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When You Start To Become Mature, These 20 Great Things Happen In Your Life

When You Start To Become Mature, These 20 Great Things Happen In Your Life

Do you remember when you were a kid in your bed at night? Whenever you saw someone older you couldn’t wait until you were older too. You envied college students and their freedom. Even adults looked pretty cool, walking into hi-rise office buildings with their shiny leather briefcases. But the closer you are to becoming a mature grown-up, the more you find yourself avoiding it.

You probably did go to college and are now working on the top floor of a hi-rise building carrying some type of case that holds your two cellphones, and iPad. You look mature but deep inside you still feel a sense of closeness to the little child holding his teddy bear.

You might not feel that it will happen, but one day you will mature. Your “carefree-whatever” lifestyle will transform, and you will become a responsible functioning adult. You can’t avoid it. Personal evolution is continuous. Life changes you, whether you like it or not. Your perspective, relationships, values, and style as they are now will also change. That’s reality.

It doesn’t mean that life will stop throwing mud in your face. It just means that when maturity kicks in, everything becomes less frantic.

Maturing is an on-going process of growth. Your experiences teach you lessons that will make your life easier.

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1. You will pay off your debt.

It will happen. One day you will be caught up with all your bills. You will get tired of carrying that financial burden around and you will  figure out a way to pay off your debt.

2. You will pay your bills on time every month.

Instead of waiting until the last minute of the grace period ending up with a $35 late fee, you will find an app that reminds you when all your bills are due and then you will pay them on time.

3. You will know (and respect) the difference between what you need and what you want.

There are a lot of tantalizing products to buy and they are hard to resist but when you mature you will know when it’s the right time to buy what you want. If you have the extra money go ahead, treat yourself. Just make sure your bills are paid before you buy the next best thing or Google glass.

4. You will take care of your health.

Doctors’ appointments are easy to put off. No one likes to go through the hassle of making an appointment, going to the office, getting blood work, and waiting for follow-up calls. You can procrastinate and say, “Let’s see if this gets worse.” But then you will find yourself of waiting for it to get better until your ailment needs emergency treatment at 3:00 a.m. When you become mature, you will notice something is wrong early on and make that doctor’s appointment right away.

5. You will go to the dentist for regular cleanings.

Not because your Mom told you to (or because the pain from your abscessed tooth forces you to) but because you want to look great and keep your pearly whites to be healthy instead of facing many more hours in a dental chair as he puts in implants.

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6. You will eat foods that make you feel good.

Instead of eating foods that cause you to run to the bathroom, you will make smarter food choices. If gluten messes up your stomach, you won’t eat it. If you’re lactose intolerant, you’ll get used to drinking almond milk. Healthy foods feel better than junk food.

7.  You will date people who are potential life partners.

Marriage will be an option, not a disease you’re afraid to catch. You’ll realize that spending every night at the local bar with friends is fine for now, but you will realize that you want a real life partner to share your life with and you won’t be afraid to commit to that.

8. You will be able to admit your weaknesses and know how to strengthen them.

Mature persons know how to improve themselves. If they are always late, they will leave extra time to get ready so they show up on time. If they have a hard time apologizing, they’ll realize that and instead of making excuses, they will admit when they are wrong. That’s a true sign of maturity, most grown-ups have a hard time with this one.

9. You will know when to ask for help.

Every one doesn’t know everything. You can’t excel in every area of life. Asking to be mentored is a strength. All the great successful people have a mentor. Oprah had Maya Angelou and still has Steven Speilberg. Michael Jordan was mentored by Phil Jackson and Bill Gates has Warren Buffet. If they do it, so can you.

10. You will be a better son/daughter, brother/sister, step-brother/step-sister, aunt/uncle.

Family will matter. You will call your parents regularly instead of only calling when you need something. And you will know that you have matured when your phone call starts with “how are you?” instead of asking for what you need.

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11. You will be able to control your impulses.

You will be mature enough to know the consequences of your actions and your words and have the strength to not give in to your every impulse. Every text message doesn’t have to be immediately answered. Mature people can wait.

12. You will be able to express yourself in a calmer, respectful tone of voice.

Your communication skills will improve. You will soon realize you don’t have to verbalize every thought you have. You will speak realistically – no more exaggerations, no more magnifications. You will deal with facts and not fabrications.

13. You will become more flexible.

Nothing is as constant as change. It is the only thing you can be sure of. Nothing ever stays the same (even when you want it to). When you mature you will realize that and learn to accept change. You may have to adjust to make someone else happy or know when it’s time to change jobs but you’ll be able to manage it. A mature person knows that even if the change won’t be easy, they will have the skills to maneuver their way through it.

 14. You will have an easier time making decisions.

You will be able to process the pros and cons of your dilemmas and then you will be able to make that decision. It doesn’t mean every decision will be the correct one, but you will feel confident that you made the best decision at the time.

15. You will take responsibility for your actions.

Instead of blaming everyone else for your unfortunate outcomes, you will have clear vision and see that your choices caused those outcomes. When you mature, it’s time to man-up and own your actions. Emotional maturity makes it easier to say, “I did that. How can I make it better next time?”

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16. You will become less dramatic.

Things will not all feel like catastrophic events to you anymore. Things will be in proper perspective. You’ll be able to see a “big picture” view of what is realistically happening. Your mind will process each situation with clarity based in reality.

17. You will accept and respect other people’s opinions and ideas.

When you mature, your ego is aligned. You will learn that every incident doesn’t revolve around you. You will see that other people matter too and realize that other people’s opinions have value.

18. You will not get your feelings hurt so easily.

Somehow as the years go by, you toughen up. You won’t get your feelings hurt as often and as hard as they do now. Criticism won’t bruise you or force you to end relationships. You will realize that someone’s comments might be worth thinking about.

19. You will make smarter choices. Wisdom comes with age.

As you mature you will see that smart choices are so much more enjoyable than fun choices. Sure, everyone wants to have fun but when you mature you will realize that your “fun” choices are causing too many problems in your life. You’ll be so much happier when you make smart choices. Clarity is your new best friend.

20. You will become a better life manager when you mature.

You will get a grip on how to handle whatever comes your way because you no longer have a backlog of avoided problems stored up. Your vision will be clear and you will know how to navigate through each crisis without having to ask 10 friends what they think.

Maturity is a reality. Welcome it, don’t fear it. You will be so much happier when you do. You may fly higher than you ever dreamed you would. 

Featured photo credit: geetkshizzle via geekshizzle.com

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Last Updated on March 14, 2019

7 Questions to Ask in a Job Interview That Will Impress the Interviewer

7 Questions to Ask in a Job Interview That Will Impress the Interviewer

Recruiters might hold thousands of interviews in their careers and a lot of them are reporting the same thing—that most candidates play it safe with the questions they ask, or have no questions to ask in a job interview at all.

For job applicants, this approach is crazy! This is a job that you’re going to dedicate a lot of hours to and that might have a huge impact on your future career. Don’t throw away the chance to figure out if the position is perfect for you.

Here are 7 killer questions to ask in a job interview that will both impress your counterpart and give you some really useful insights into whether this job will be a dream … or a nightmare.

1. What are some challenges I might come up against this role?

A lesser candidate might ask, “what does a typical day look like in this role?” While this is a perfectly reasonable question to ask in an interview, focusing on potential challenges takes you much further because it indicates that you already are visualizing yourself in the role.

It’s impressive because it shows that you are not afraid of challenges, and you are prepared to strategize a game plan upfront to make sure you succeed if you get the job.

It can also open up a conversation about how you’ve solved problems in the past which can be a reassuring exercise for both you and the hiring manager.

How it helps you:

If you ask the interviewer to describe a typical day, you may get a vibrant picture of all the lovely things you’ll get to do in this job and all the lovely people you’ll get to do them with.

Asking about potential roadblocks means you hear the other side of the story—dysfunctional teams, internal politics, difficult clients, bootstrap budgets and so on. This can help you decide if you’re up for the challenge or whether, for the sake of your sanity, you should respectfully decline the job offer.

2. What are the qualities of really successful people in this role?

Employers don’t want to hire someone who goes through the motions; they want to hire someone who will excel.

Asking this question shows that you care about success, too. How could they not hire you with a dragon-slayer attitude like that?

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How it helps you:

Interviewers hire people who are great people to work with, but the definition of “great people” differs from person to person.

Does this company hire and promote people with a specific attitude, approach, worth ethic or communication style? Are the most successful people in this role strong extroverts who love to talk and socialize when you are studious and reserved? Does the company reward those who work insane hours when you’re happiest in a more relaxed environment?

If so, then this may not be the right match for you.

Whatever the answer is, you can decide whether you have what it takes for the manager to be happy with your performance in this role. And if the interviewer has no idea what success looks like for this position, this is a sign to proceed with extreme caution.

3. From the research I did on your company, I noticed the culture really supports XYZ. Can you tell me more about that element of the culture and how it impacts this job role?

Of course, you could just ask “what is the culture like here? ” but then you would miss a great opportunity to show that you’ve done your research!

Interviewers give BIG bonus point to those who read up and pay attention, and you’ve just pointed out that (a) you’re diligent in your research (b) you care about the company culture and (c) you’re committed to finding a great cultural fit.

How it helps you:

This question is so useful because it lets you pick an element of the culture that you really care about and that will have the most impact on whether you are happy with the organization.

For example, if training and development is important to you, then you need to know what’s on offer so you don’t end up in a dead-end job with no learning opportunities.

Companies often talk a good talk, and their press releases may be full of shiny CSR initiatives and all the headline-grabbing diversity programs they’re putting in place. This is your opportunity to look under the hood and see if the company lives its values on the ground.

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A company that says it is committed to doing the right thing by customers should not judge success by the number of up-sells an employee makes, for instance. Look for consistency, so you aren’t in for a culture shock after you start.

4. What is the promotion path for this role, and how would my performance on that path be measured?

To be clear, you are not asking when you will get promoted. Don’t go there—it’s presumptuous, and it indicates that you think you are better than the role you have applied for.

A career-minded candidate, on the other hand, usually has a plan that she’s working towards. This question shows you have a great drive toward growth and advancement and an intention to stick with the company beyond your current state.

How it helps you:

One word: hierarchy.

All organizations have levels of work and authority—executives, upper managers, line managers, the workforce, and so on. Understanding the hierarchical structure gives you power, because you can decide if you can work within it and are capable of climbing through its ranks, or whether it will be endlessly frustrating to you.

In a traditional pyramid hierarchy, for example, the people at the bottom tend to have very little autonomy to make decisions. This gets better as you rise up through the pyramid, but even middle managers have little power to create policy; they are more concerned with enforcing the rules the top leaders make.

If having a high degree of autonomy and accountability is important to you, you may do better in a flat hierarchy where work teams can design their own way of achieving the corporate goals.

5. What’s the most important thing the successful candidate could accomplish in their first 3 months/6 months/year?

Of all the questions to ask in a job interview, this one is impressive because it shows that you identify with and want to be a successful performer, and not just an average one.

Here, you’re drilling down into what the company needs, and needs quite urgently, proving that you’re all about adding value to the organization and not just about what’s in it for you.

How it helps you:

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Most job descriptions come with 8, 10 or 12 different job responsibilities and a lot of them with be boilerplate or responsibilities that someone in HR thinks are associated with this role. This question gives you a better sense of which responsibilities are the most important—and they may not be what initially attracted you to the role.

If you like the idea of training juniors, for example, but success is judged purely on your sales figures, then is this really the job you thought you were applying for?

This question will also give you an idea of what kind of learning curve you’re expected to have and whether you’ll get any ramp-up time before getting down to business. If you’re the type of person who likes to jump right in and get things done, for instance, you may not be thrilled to hear that you’re going to spend the first three months shadowing a peer.

6. What do you like about working here?

This simple question is all about building rapport with the interviewer. People like to talk about themselves, and the interviewer will be flattered that you’re interested in her opinions.

Hopefully, you’ll find some great connection points that the two of you share. What similar things drive you head into the office each day? How will you fit into the culture?

How it helps you:

You can learn a lot from this question. Someone who genuinely enjoys his job will be able to list several things they like, and their answers will sound passionate and sincere. If not….well, you might consider that a red flag.

Since you potentially can learn a lot about the company culture from this question, it’s a good idea to figure out upfront what’s important to you. Maybe you’re looking for a hands-off boss who values independent thought and creativity? Maybe you work better in environments that move at a rapid, exciting pace?

Whatever’s important to you, listen carefully and see if you can find any common ground.

7. Based on this interview, do you have any questions or concerns about my qualifications for the role?

What a great closing question to ask in a job interview! It shows that you’re not afraid of feedback—in fact, you are inviting it. Not being able to take criticism is a red flag for employers, who need to know that you’ll act on any “coaching moments” with a good heart.

As a bonus, asking this question shows that you are really interested in the position and wish to clear up anything that may be holding the company back from hiring you.

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How it helps you:

What a devious beast this question is! On the surface, it looks straightforward, but it’s actually giving you four key pieces of information.

First, is the manager capable of giving you feedback when put on the spot like this? Some managers are scared of giving feedback, or don’t think it’s important enough to bother outside of a formal performance appraisal. Do you want to work for a boss like that? How will you improve if no one is telling you what you did wrong?

Second, can the manager give feedback in a constructive way without being too pillowy or too confrontational? It’s unfair to expect the interviewer to have figured out your preferred way of receiving feedback in the space of an interview, but if she come back with a machine-gun fire of shortcomings or one of those corporate feedback “sandwiches” (the doozy slipped between two slices of compliment), then you need to ask yourself, can you work with someone who gives feedback like that?

Third, you get to learn the things the hiring manager is concerned about before you leave the interview. This gives you the chance to make a final, tailored sales pitch so you can convince the interviewer that she should not be worried about those things.

Fourth, you get to learn the things the hiring manager is concerned about period. If turnover is keeping him up at night, then your frequent job hopping might get a lot of additional scrutiny. If he’s facing some issues with conflict or communication, then he might raise concerns regarding your performance in this area.

Listen carefully: the concerns that are being raised about you might actually be a proxy for problems in the wider organization.

Making Your Interview Work for You

Interviews are a two-way street. While it is important to differentiate yourself from every other candidate, understand that convincing the interviewer you’re the right person for the role goes hand-in-hand with figuring out if the job is the right fit for you.

Would you feel happy in a work environment where the people, priorities, culture and management style were completely at odds with the way you work? Didn’t think so!

More Resources About Job Interviews

Featured photo credit: Amy Hirschi via unsplash.com

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