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These Simple Ways Will Improve Your Relationship Starting Today

These Simple Ways Will Improve Your Relationship Starting Today

1. Communicate more.

A successful relationship is never going to happen between two people who don’t talk. And, as the saying goes, “communication is key.” So, spend time every day talking. It doesn’t have to be long, but make sure you’re really connecting. This means, no TV, no radio, and no internet–just talking. Knowing what is going on in your partner’s mind will help you know how to support him or her, and a more supportive relationship is a better one.

2. Focus on the positive.

At the beginning of a relationship, you only see the best side of your partner. Then, as your relationship goes on, you start seeing all the little annoying things he or she does. It’s like cracks start appearing in your once perfect significant other. The bad news is once the cracks appear, you can never forget them. You have to make an conscious effort to look past your partner’s imperfections. Stay focused on the positive parts of his or her personality and you will have a better relationship. How do you do this? Be grateful for him or her. Be grateful for what he or she does and who they are. Then, the little cracks will become what they started out as– little.

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3. Show don’t tell.

About a year after I got married I learned the biggest secret of relationships. I was annoyed about how my spouse reacted. It kept getting to me, wearing on my nerves. Well, the next day I did the exact same thing. Then I realized the big secret: the things you’re most annoyed about are usually things you are doing yourself. Fix your own behavior and your partner will typically follow suit.

4. Ask what you could do better.

It’s always good to check up with your partner. Don’t guess about what you could do better – ask. It’s easy, and you might find out that doing something little for him or her will pay off tremendously. Also, you may get a hidden benefit: your partner might ask what he or she can do for you!

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5. Listen.

It’s easy to talk about yourself, but that could make your partner feel insignificant. Make sure you shut your mouth enough to listen to what he or she has to say. Also, try and remember what they’ve said. Following up with him or her about something said, like an important project or something he or she was worried about can make them feel like you really care.

6. Embrace imperfection.

No one is perfect. You’re flawed and so is your significant other. Sometimes you’ll need to get over the little things your partner does that bother you. Does he forget to take out the trash? Does she always leave dirty dishes in the sink? Well, the easiest thing to do is to get over it. But, if you can’t get over it here’s a fun trick: consider doing a “nasty habit trade.” This is where you both get to pick something the other one does that you hate. Then you both decide to work on your bad habits at the same time. Neither of you will be defensive because you’re each tackling a bad habit. And, you will be more motivated to change because your partner will be working on his or her bad habit at the same time.

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7. Have fun.

Sometimes relationships are hard. It can be a struggle to deal with family members, finances, kids, work and everything else. Carving out time to play, laugh and have a good time is crucial. It doesn’t have to be anything big. Last year for Christmas I made my husband the “12 Dates of Christmas.” I put 12 dates in envelopes for him to open each month this year. It’s been fun to open them up and plan something new.

Featured photo credit: Lover’s Quarrel/Alex De Carvelho via flickr.com

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Kelsie Fannon

Kelsie is a journalist and writer who shares about productivity and money tips on Lifehack.

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Last Updated on September 12, 2019

12 Things You Should Remember When Feeling Lost in Life

12 Things You Should Remember When Feeling Lost in Life

Even the most charismatic people you know, whether in person or celebrities of some sort, experience days where they feel lost in life and isolated from everyone else.

While it’s good to know we aren’t alone in this feeling, the question still remains:

What should we do when we feel lost and lonely?

Here are 12 things to remember:

1. Recognize That It’s Okay!

The truth is, there are times you need to be alone. If you’ve always been accustomed to being in contact with people, this may prove difficult.

However, learning how to be alone and comfortable in your own skin will give you confidence and a sense of self reliance.

We cheat ourselves out of the opportunity to become self reliant when we look for constant companionship.

Learn how to embrace your me time: What Your Fear of Being Alone Is Really About and How to Get over It

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2. Use Your Lost and Loneliness as a Self-Directing Guide

You’ve most likely heard the expression: “You have to know where you’ve been to know where you’re going.”

Loneliness also serves as a life signal to indicate you’re in search of something. It’s when we’re in the midst of solitude that answers come from true soul searching.

Remember, there is more to life than what you’re feeling.

3. Realize Loneliness Helps You Face the Truth

Being in the constant company of others, although comforting sometimes, can often serve as a distraction when we need to face the reality of a situation.

Solitude cuts straight to the chase and forces you to deal with the problem at hand. See it as a blessing that can serve as a catalyst to set things right!

4. Be Aware That You Have More Control Than You Think

Typically, when we see ourselves as being lost or lonely, it gives us an excuse to view everything we come in contact with in a negative light. It lends itself to putting ourselves in the victim mode, when the truth of the matter is that you choose your attitude in every situation.

No one can force a feeling upon you! It is YOU who has the ultimate say as to how you choose to react.

5. Embrace the Freedom That the Feeling of Being Alone Can Offer

Instead of wallowing in self pity, which many are prone to do because of loneliness, try looking at your circumstance as a new-found freedom.

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Most people are in constant need of approval of their viewpoints. Try enjoying the fact that  you don’t need everyone you care about to support your decisions.

6. Acknowledge the Person You Are Now

Perhaps you feel a sense of loneliness and confusion because your life circumstances have taken you away from the persona that others know to be you.

Perhaps the new you differs radically from the old. Realize that life is about change and how we react to that change. It’s okay that you’re not who you used to be.

Take a look at this article and learn to accept your imperfect self: Accept Yourself (Flaws and All): 7 Benefits of Being Vulnerable

7. Keep Striving to Do Your Best

Often those who are feeling isolated and unto themselves will develop a defeatist attitude. They’ll do substandard work because their self esteem is low and they don’t care.

Never let this feeling take away your sense of worth! Do your best always and when you come through this dark time, others will admire how you stayed determined in spite of the obstacles you had to overcome.

And to live your best life, you must do this ONE thing: step out of your comfort zone.

8. Don’t Forget That Time Is Precious

When we’re lost in a sea of loneliness and depression, it’s all too easy to reflect on regrets of past life events. This does nothing but feed negativity and perpetuate the situation.

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Instead of falling prey to this common pitfall, put one foot in front of the other and acknowledge every positive step you take. By doing this, you can celebrate the struggles you overcome at the end of the day.

9. Remember, Things Happen for a Reason

Every circumstance we encounter in our life is designed to teach us and that lesson is in turn passed on to others.

Sometimes we’re fortunate enough to figure out the lesson to be learned, while other times, we simply need to have faith that if the lesson wasn’t meant directly for us to learn from, how we handled it was observed by someone who needed to learn.

Your solitude and feeling of lost, in this instance, although painful possibly, may be teaching someone else.

10. Journal During This Time

Record your thoughts when you’re at the height of loneliness and feeling lost. You’ll be amazed when you reflect back at how you viewed things at the time and how far you’ve come later.

This time (if recorded) can give you a keen insight into who you are and what makes you feel the way you feel.

11. Remember You Aren’t the First to Feel This Way

It’s quite common to feel as if we’re alone and no one else has ever felt this way before. We think this because at the time of our distress, we’re silently observing others around us who are seemingly fine in every way.

The truth is, we can’t possibly know the struggles of those around us unless they elect to share them. We ALL have known this pain!

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Try confiding in someone you trust and ask them how they deal with these feelings when they experienced it. You may be surprised at what you learn.

12. Ask for Help If the Problem Persists

The feeling of being lost and lonely is common to everyone, but typically it will last for a relatively short period of time.

Most people will confess to, at one time or another, being in a “funk.” But if the problem persists longer than you feel it should, don’t ignore it.

When your ability to reason and consider things rationally becomes impaired, do not poo poo the problem away and think it isn’t worthy of attention. Seek medical help.

Afraid to ask for help? Here’s how to change your outlook to aim high!

Final Thoughts

Loneliness and a sense of feeling lost can in many ways be extremely painful and difficult to deal with at best. However, these feelings can also serve as a catalyst for change in our lives if we acknowledge them and act.

Above anything, cherish your mental well being and don’t underestimate its worth. Seek professional guidance if you’re unable to distinguish between a sense of freedom for yourself and a sense of despair.

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Featured photo credit: Andrew Neel via unsplash.com

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