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The Number One Reason You’re Still Single

The Number One Reason You’re Still Single

I hate to be the one to break it to you but if you’re still single and don’t want to be there is really only one reason why. Now, you might need to sit down for this one. Are you ready? Here we go!

The number one reason is …

You just haven’t found the right one yet.

OK, let that sink in for a minute.

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My guess is that you were probably expecting a different answer, right? Like something that is wrong with you? Maybe you’re not pretty enough or masculine enough, not funny enough, not smart enough, not [insert your own negative criticism here].

Well, that’s not actually the truth; the truth is that you just haven’t found them yet.

I know we haven’t met before, but I’m guessing you’re pretty awesome, that there is nothing wrong with you and that you are possibly your own worst critic. Don’t believe me? Check out this video: What do strangers think of you?

So do yourself a huge favor, cut the negative thoughts, get happy and start loving yourself and your single freedom. The right one will come along in their own time. In the meantime, here is my list of eight things you can be doing while you wait for Mr or Ms Right. The best part is that it’s all about you, so get creative and add your own in – I’d love to hear what you’ve included.

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1. Stop waiting for them and start living in the now

It’s a good idea to know what you are looking for in a partner. If you don’t, how will you know when you’ve found him or her? But, if you are spending every waking moment day dreaming about them, then there is a big chance that you are wasting your valuable time right now. Instead of thinking about them, why not think about you? What goals do you want to achieve in the next 12 months? What places do you want to see? Which people you want to visit? Dream them up and then make a plan to achieve them. Because guess what? You’re single and you can do whatever you want!

2. Learn to love yourself

There is only ever going to be one of you. You are unique and special. Be proud of who you are and all the things you have achieved. You don’t need someone else to make you feel loved and you don’t need someone else to make you feel whole. You already have everything you need right now to live a happy, healthy and full life. So don’t be hard on yourself, learn to love yourself exactly the way you are.

3. Learn to love your single freedom

Dr Phil said it best: “It is better to be happy alone than sick with someone else. The most important relationship you have is the one you have with yourself.” I can’t agree more. Being single has so many benefits; it’s your chance to be selfish and do all the things you want to do. So get out there and enjoy it! Not sure where to start? Try these: 10 Things You Must Do When You’re Single.

4. Listen to the story you’re telling yourself

I recently wrote a blog post about listening to the stories that we tell ourselves. Anything you say that’s really negative is not helping you. If you call yourself a “freak magnet,” or tell yourself “all the good men/women are taken,” or that you are “never going to find someone,” then your chances of this happening are very high. We attract what we put out there to the world. So change that story and attract something new.

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5. Make time for your friends and family

When the time comes and you do find someone amazing, chances are you will have less time for many of your favorite people. So make time for your friends and family now by planning holidays to see them or trips together. Hang out and do things with the people who are closest to you.

6. Get out and try something new

Have you been wanting to try something different lately? Is there something you’ve always wanted to do but haven’t had a chance to do it yet? Well, go out and do it! No doubt it will make you feel incredible. Don’t stop at one thing either. Make up your bucket list and start crossing things off now.

7. Set yourself a big goal and spend some time each day making it happen

It could be a career change, it could be overseas travel, it could be starting your dream business. Don’t hold yourself back. Write down that big goal and then work on it each and every day. Who knows what you can achieve. How exciting!

8. Trust the process

Have you ever listened to your friends who are married or in a relationship? Often they have a story about all the losers they met prior to finding their loved one. That’s because we all need to go through the process, to learn our own lessons and meet a few oddballs before the universe brings us the one we’re meant to be with. You are exactly where you need to be right now, so trust the process.

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“Someday, someone will walk into your life and make you realize why it never worked with anyone else.” – Unknown

 

Stop looking for the negatives and start loving all the positives that come with your single freedom. Chances are when you get a little bit distracted and start achieving some big goals, the right one might just come along.

What would you like to add to this list? I’d love to know in the comments below.

You might also like: 7 Reasons Why You Are Still Single

Featured photo credit: mírame – look at me/ruurmo via flickr.com

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Last Updated on November 5, 2019

12 Powerful Habits of a Lifelong Learner

12 Powerful Habits of a Lifelong Learner

Formal education is something everyone has to go through to a certain degree, and the knowledge it offers isn’t always that practical in real life. Life long learning is how you improve as a person, bit by bit and day by day.

Life long learners recognize the importance and joy of growth so they never settle for what they currently know and always seek for improvement.

Here are 12 habits of people who value lifelong learning have in common – see how many of them you recognize in yourself.

1. They Read on a Daily Basis

Whatever problem or dilemma you currently face, there’s definitely at least one decent book that discusses it and presents a variety of solutions.

Reading is a great way to open up new horizons, train your brain and revolutionize your life. I can’t even count how many times books completely transformed the way I view the world, and it’s always a change for the better. Through reading, you can connect with successful people and learn from the lessons they share.

Life long learners love to get lost in books and do it regularly. Bill Gates knows that reading matters a lot; on his personal blog, he reviews plenty of game-changing books.

Due to technology, you can access a bookshelf of the wealthiest entrepreneur on this planet.

2. They Attend Various Courses

Whether it’s online or offline, there are countless courses you can participate in without spending a dime on it. These are great opportunities to connect with clever and like-minded people and learn from them.

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Because of the advanced technology, you can now gain knowledge from online programs, starting from coding through self-improvement to programs from top universities.

There are literally endless ways to thrive. What life long learners have in common is squeezing as much as possible out of these opportunities.

3. They Actively Seek Opportunities to Grow

Instead of spending your free time laying on the couch and watching TV, you prefer doing something creative and practical. You know every wasted minute is gone forever.

That’s why you’d rather practice your language skills with a native-speaker you’ve met, engage in local meet up or attend a class that teaches something you always wanted to learn.

Life long learners stay up-to-date with growth opportunities in their areas and participate in them frequently.

4. They Take Care of Their Bodies

“Physical fitness is not only one of the most important keys to a healthy body, it is the basis of dynamic and creative intellectual activity.” — John F. Kennedy

A clever mind combined with a body in a great condition is the best asset you can have. Our bodies were designed to run, walk, jump, swim, lift and much more. Leading a sedentary lifestyle harms both your physical and mental sphere.

Life long learners know the body is your temple. In order to make it flourish for as long as possible, they train regularly, move a lot and eat healthy.

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5. They Have Diverse Passions

Among Steve Jobs’ wise quotes, there’s one I like especially. It’s about connecting the dots:

“You can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backward. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future.” — Steve Jobs

Each dot is some event or skill in your life, and it’s only when you go through these elements that you know how to combine them into something great.

Having a variety of passions indicates that you love to progress. By practicing different skills, you give yourself an advantage over the rest of the people. During hard times, you are more likely to to act intelligently and solve your problems with less effort.

6. They Love Making Progress

If behind the efforts, there is passion and a deep desire to grow, your chances of success are way higher, compared to when you are forced to learn.

Life long learners love to experience the constant growth and improvement. The breakthrough moments help them to notice the impressive change that took place because of the learning process. Any milestone serves as a driving force for further headway.

7. They Challenge Themselves with Specific Goals

In order to keep growing, you clearly define your goals. Smart goal setting is one of the tools to ensure constant growth.

Since you love challenges, a difficult goal doesn’t scare you. Quite the opposite, it keeps you motivated and engaged.

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Research showed that precise and ambitious goals increase the performance of an individual. As we already agreed, life long learners are people who care about their performance, hence they never stop improving.

8. They Embrace Change

A complete change can lead to incredible results. This is especially visible on the example of successful companies.

Oftentimes, it’s that transformation which created space for their so-called overnight success. Twitter was originally created as an internal service to serve Odeo employees. Currently, it has over 300 million monthly active users and is considered the second biggest social network.

As a life long learner, you know a change can lead to extraordinary results so you welcome it and stay open minded about making a shift.

9. They Believe It’s Never Too Late to Start Something

Some people tend to think after a certain age, they are no longer allowed to start something and become successful. The truth is, it’s just a lame excuse not to leave the comfort zone.

Opposite to common misconceptions, there’s no wrong age to begin something. Henry Ford was 45 when he invented the Ford Model T car, which is considered as the first affordable automobile.

Sure, for some domains like becoming a professional athlete, starting early is required. However, to learn and improve for its own sake, you are never too old.

10. Their Attitude to Getting Better Is Contagious

“We now accept the fact that learning is a life long process of keeping abreast of change. And the most pressing task is to teach people how to learn.” — Peter Drucker

There’s nothing better than to see your surroundings getting involved in what you actively participate in. Oftentimes, the best way to achieve that is to inspire them and be the example. As Gandhi would say, you need to be the change you want to see in the world.

As a life long learner, you are extremely passionate about the constant growth and people around you can sense that positive attitude. As a result, they start acting similarly.

11. They Leave Their Comfort Zone

Is it really better to step out of your comfort zone? The answer is always yes.

You always embrace discomfort as you know the path to success leads through hardship and countless obstacles. Instead of being afraid of facing them, you challenge yourself to overcome more and more difficult handicaps.

Every time you get out of your comfort zone, regardless whether you win or fail, you learn something new. That’s the part you love the most!

12. They Never Settle Down

“Knowledge is exploding, so you need to commit yourself to a plan for life long learning.” — Don Tapscott

A sense of being clever enough is something you don’t experience. Without a doubt, you appreciate what you already know, but that’s never a reason to stop. You just know once you stop learning, you lose the amazing privilege humans have, namely an ability to a never-ending intellectual development.

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Featured photo credit: Christin Hume via unsplash.com

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