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Learn How To Really Maintain A Long-Term And Fulfilling Relationship

Learn How To Really Maintain A Long-Term And Fulfilling Relationship

Many men think that seduction stops when the relationship begins. Some guys think of  “settling down” as a kind of retirement, a vacation from being an independent charismatic person, and a shift to a more restrictive lifestyle. These men know nothing about women or living as a couple…

The contradiction is that in seduction the idea is to show you are attracted and make the girl attracted back. There’s no use in trying to conceal it. But why do we use the tools of seduction during the first few dates and then throw them away? And why do we trade in the excitement of the seduction for the stability of a relationship anyways?

We will explore all of these issues through the most important question: does seduction stop once you enter the door of a relationship? Hang on; the answer is going to blow you away!

A relationship is not an end in itself

What many people forget is that entering into a relationship is not jumping into a bed of rose petals. It shouldn’t be some kind of life goal (note that people obsessed with the idea of living as a couple face enormous difficulties in finding a suitable partner) nor fate.

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I have often observed this kind of thinking. The guy in a relationship is seen either as a caged prisoner desperate for freedom, or as the luckiest man in the world (let’s be honest, according to the shape of his girlfriend).

However, we all need to recognize that the flame of a relationship grows through a simple process: seduction.

There is nothing shameful in this. Having feelings is not something we control. They are there, and that’s it. From that point on, it is our responsibility only to make enough efforts to continue just enough to keep the flame alive.

Love stories don’t just happen, gentlemen. They evolve, taking shape, according to mutual feelings, time spent together, arguments, or successes …

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Love stories as cyclical patterns

What people see on the surface in any relationship is a happy couple, solid, ready to meet the challenges of everyday life. This idea is bolstered by what we often consider a traditional family (two parents and two children).

These standards tend to make us believe that once we fall into a relationship the worst is over. We’ve made it! But then the passion dies. “L’amour fou” (mad love) is a short-term contract. Once this period (from 1 to 3 years according to experts) is over, the challenge begins.

Yes, I said it: CHALLENGE. Any routine that can lead to comfort, can also lead to weariness. And weariness can slowly lead to separation. You must build a set of habits that keep things interesting if you want to push through this period.

This spiral can be prevented, and here we’ll give you some tools to push through … First off we need to establish that seduction should constantly remain part of your repertoire. Second, stop thinking about whether or not you’ve found “the one” (it’s a silly question, it will be obvious, and it’s the basis of a boring relationship).

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Actions to fully satisfy your partner on a daily basis

Relationship seduction will be A couple needs energy and dynamism. The latter can be created or promoted by following some simple but effective principles:

Be yourself: It is a necessity. A man who acts like a phony dick will eventually be tossed into the trash heap. Psychological and intellectual challenges must be permanent. Your personal development is at the heart of your relationship. Be a man or your relationship would not survive.

Don’t be predictable: Instead of waiting for a birthday or valentine’s day, be more the type to organize surprises from time to time (go out to dine in a restaurant, travel or make a short trip, have a romantic weekend …). This will kick boring habits to the curb. Include your partner in your personal development process. Bam! Two birds and one stone…

Always be honest and sincere: A life based on lies and deception doesn’t last you very long. If you love your partner, prove it by allowing him or her to get a place in your world and never hid from her what lies deep within you.

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Be strong:  If you can share your feelings and thoughts, be careful not to abandon your status as an independent man. Women are looking for protection and security (financial, intellectual, psychological and physical). So do not spend your time complaining or highlight your weaknesses.

Be independent: An attractive man is a proactive man, always demanding challenges and personal fulfillment. If she feels she is a hindrance to your development there may be lost confidence (on both sides) in your ability to be happy with her. Stay active!

This is but a small snapshot. Unlike in traditional seduction, in relationship seduction men need to consistently and effectively work on their image, behavior… otherwise the relationship could go haywire. So, is seduction important to relationships? Yes!

Seduction is not only important; it is the cement, the base. If you abandon this outlook when settling down with a woman, you lose yourself and your freedom, and you might lose the girl in the process.

You have been warned, my friend.

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Last Updated on September 12, 2019

12 Things You Should Remember When Feeling Lost in Life

12 Things You Should Remember When Feeling Lost in Life

Even the most charismatic people you know, whether in person or celebrities of some sort, experience days where they feel lost in life and isolated from everyone else.

While it’s good to know we aren’t alone in this feeling, the question still remains:

What should we do when we feel lost and lonely?

Here are 12 things to remember:

1. Recognize That It’s Okay!

The truth is, there are times you need to be alone. If you’ve always been accustomed to being in contact with people, this may prove difficult.

However, learning how to be alone and comfortable in your own skin will give you confidence and a sense of self reliance.

We cheat ourselves out of the opportunity to become self reliant when we look for constant companionship.

Learn how to embrace your me time: What Your Fear of Being Alone Is Really About and How to Get over It

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2. Use Your Lost and Loneliness as a Self-Directing Guide

You’ve most likely heard the expression: “You have to know where you’ve been to know where you’re going.”

Loneliness also serves as a life signal to indicate you’re in search of something. It’s when we’re in the midst of solitude that answers come from true soul searching.

Remember, there is more to life than what you’re feeling.

3. Realize Loneliness Helps You Face the Truth

Being in the constant company of others, although comforting sometimes, can often serve as a distraction when we need to face the reality of a situation.

Solitude cuts straight to the chase and forces you to deal with the problem at hand. See it as a blessing that can serve as a catalyst to set things right!

4. Be Aware That You Have More Control Than You Think

Typically, when we see ourselves as being lost or lonely, it gives us an excuse to view everything we come in contact with in a negative light. It lends itself to putting ourselves in the victim mode, when the truth of the matter is that you choose your attitude in every situation.

No one can force a feeling upon you! It is YOU who has the ultimate say as to how you choose to react.

5. Embrace the Freedom That the Feeling of Being Alone Can Offer

Instead of wallowing in self pity, which many are prone to do because of loneliness, try looking at your circumstance as a new-found freedom.

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Most people are in constant need of approval of their viewpoints. Try enjoying the fact that  you don’t need everyone you care about to support your decisions.

6. Acknowledge the Person You Are Now

Perhaps you feel a sense of loneliness and confusion because your life circumstances have taken you away from the persona that others know to be you.

Perhaps the new you differs radically from the old. Realize that life is about change and how we react to that change. It’s okay that you’re not who you used to be.

Take a look at this article and learn to accept your imperfect self: Accept Yourself (Flaws and All): 7 Benefits of Being Vulnerable

7. Keep Striving to Do Your Best

Often those who are feeling isolated and unto themselves will develop a defeatist attitude. They’ll do substandard work because their self esteem is low and they don’t care.

Never let this feeling take away your sense of worth! Do your best always and when you come through this dark time, others will admire how you stayed determined in spite of the obstacles you had to overcome.

And to live your best life, you must do this ONE thing: step out of your comfort zone.

8. Don’t Forget That Time Is Precious

When we’re lost in a sea of loneliness and depression, it’s all too easy to reflect on regrets of past life events. This does nothing but feed negativity and perpetuate the situation.

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Instead of falling prey to this common pitfall, put one foot in front of the other and acknowledge every positive step you take. By doing this, you can celebrate the struggles you overcome at the end of the day.

9. Remember, Things Happen for a Reason

Every circumstance we encounter in our life is designed to teach us and that lesson is in turn passed on to others.

Sometimes we’re fortunate enough to figure out the lesson to be learned, while other times, we simply need to have faith that if the lesson wasn’t meant directly for us to learn from, how we handled it was observed by someone who needed to learn.

Your solitude and feeling of lost, in this instance, although painful possibly, may be teaching someone else.

10. Journal During This Time

Record your thoughts when you’re at the height of loneliness and feeling lost. You’ll be amazed when you reflect back at how you viewed things at the time and how far you’ve come later.

This time (if recorded) can give you a keen insight into who you are and what makes you feel the way you feel.

11. Remember You Aren’t the First to Feel This Way

It’s quite common to feel as if we’re alone and no one else has ever felt this way before. We think this because at the time of our distress, we’re silently observing others around us who are seemingly fine in every way.

The truth is, we can’t possibly know the struggles of those around us unless they elect to share them. We ALL have known this pain!

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Try confiding in someone you trust and ask them how they deal with these feelings when they experienced it. You may be surprised at what you learn.

12. Ask for Help If the Problem Persists

The feeling of being lost and lonely is common to everyone, but typically it will last for a relatively short period of time.

Most people will confess to, at one time or another, being in a “funk.” But if the problem persists longer than you feel it should, don’t ignore it.

When your ability to reason and consider things rationally becomes impaired, do not poo poo the problem away and think it isn’t worthy of attention. Seek medical help.

Afraid to ask for help? Here’s how to change your outlook to aim high!

Final Thoughts

Loneliness and a sense of feeling lost can in many ways be extremely painful and difficult to deal with at best. However, these feelings can also serve as a catalyst for change in our lives if we acknowledge them and act.

Above anything, cherish your mental well being and don’t underestimate its worth. Seek professional guidance if you’re unable to distinguish between a sense of freedom for yourself and a sense of despair.

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Featured photo credit: Andrew Neel via unsplash.com

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