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Getting Textual: The Unwritten Rules of Texting You Should Know

Getting Textual: The Unwritten Rules of Texting You Should Know

Texting is something that is here to stay. It doesn’t matter if you’re using Whatsapp, Google Hangouts, Facebook Messenger, or good old fashioned text messaging because they all rely on the same premise–conducting conversations with text over a messaging service. Unlike calling or emailing, texting has its own set of rules that you should follow to have the most effective conversations.

Keep it short

The Unwritten Rules of Texting You Should Know

    In the standard text format, a single message can be between 140-160 characters. Sometimes you run a little long and you have to send multiple texts. However, if you find that you’re texting so much that it turns into a multimedia message then you should probably just call or email the other person. Texts are short communiques designed to relay details quickly. They’re not meant to be novellas.

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    Don’t flutter-text

    Flutter texting is a somewhat new term that describes the practice of sending a text at the end of every sentence. This may not seem so bad, until you have someone sending you five or six sentences. That’s five or six texts that come floating in. This causes phones to vibrate and shoot off the ringtone a bunch of times. It’s highly obnoxious. You should put the whole message in a single text because people may not appreciate their phone going off that many times all at once.

    Text to confirm plans but not to cancel

    When you confirm a plan, people are expecting you to get a hold of them so they are more likely to be paying attention to when they get a message. On the other hand, if you decide to cancel, they may be on their way to the event or be setting up. That means they’re not paying attention to their texts. Cancelling at the last minute deserves a phone call so they know that it’s happening.

    Don’t end a relationship over a text

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    The Unwritten Rules of Texting You Should Know

      There are just some things a person should never do. Ending a relationship over a text message is one of them. That is a serious life change for most people and the person you are breaking up with deserves to have the news delivered to them face to face.

      In fact, don’t deliver bad news ever over text

      Don’t tell someone a relative or a friend has passed away over a text. Don’t tell your parents you crashed the family car over a text. Anything that could be considered bad news on practically any scale should be delivered either in person or in a phone call. Sending a text to someone to deliver any bad news is a cop out. They deserve the news face to face.

      Don’t keep texting if someone doesn’t reply right away

      This one can be hard to do because impatience is a thing that we all have to some degree. However, people are not married to their phones 24 hours a day, seven days a week. Sometimes they may be in the bathroom, at work, or driving. Before you freak out and think that they’re ignoring you, give them a while to get to you. Sending texts over and over again looks really bad and it’ll do nothing but irritate the other person.

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      Use proper grammar and punctuation

      Unless you’re in high school it isn’t really en vogue to send butchered, shortened texts that barely anyone can understand, especially if you’re texting your boss, coworkers, or people who are older than you. Your grandmother doesn’t know the lingo and most business people consider it unprofessional. It’s good practice because we could all use a little brush up on our grammar and spelling every now and then.

      There is a time and a place for everything.

      If you know someone is sleeping, then you probably shouldn’t text them. The notification may wake them up and then you’ll just be dealing with one angry friend or relative. People at work should be receiving short messages so it doesn’t affect their productivity. Don’t text people when they’re driving because it could be dangerous for them. There is a time and a place to send certain texts.

      Double check the auto-correct

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      The Unwritten Rules of Texting You Should Know

        There is absolutely no reason why you should be one of those people who sends ridiculous texts. It’s just laziness. It has been documented repeatedly that auto-correct can turn an innocent text into something terrible. Make sure you read the message you’re sending before you hit Send. You don’t need your boss receiving some inappropriate text because your auto-correct turned a totally innocent word into a dirty one.

        Wrap up

        At the end of the day, people will text how they text. Just because you follow these rules doesn’t mean that other people will too. That said, you can serve as a role model to others and influence them to text more like an adult.

        Featured photo credit: text message/Class Action Central via classactioncentral.com

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        Joseph Hindy

        A writer, editor, and YouTuber who likes to share about technology and lifestyle tips.

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        Last Updated on October 14, 2020

        Had a Bad Day? 7 Ways to Rebound From It and Feel Good Again

        Had a Bad Day? 7 Ways to Rebound From It and Feel Good Again

        Today didn’t turn out as you planned, but it doesn’t mean you’re weak. It simply means that you’re human, and you’re not bad just because you had a bad day.

        “Not everyday is a good day but there is something good in every day.” -Alice Morse Earle

        It’s not the end of the world when you find yourself thinking “I had a bad day,” but it can feel like it. You may have had plans that fell apart, experiences that set you back, and interactions that only did harm.

        You may have started the day thinking you could take on it all, only to find you could hardly get out of bed. When you have a bad day, you can forget to look at the good.

        Sometimes, self-care helps us to remember why we are worth it. It helps us to recharge and reset our mindset. It helps us to know that there are still options and that the day isn’t over yet.

        Love yourself today, no matter how hard it’s been. That’s the way to find yourself amidst the hardships you have. That’s how you center yourself and regain focus and live a more meaningful life. Give yourself some credit and compassion.

        Here are 7 ways to rebound from a bad day using self-compassion as a tool. If you had a bad day, these are for you!

        1. Make a Gratitude List

        In a study on gratitude, psychologists Dr. Robert A Emmons and Dr. Michael E. McCullough conducted an experiment where one group of people wrote out gratitude lists for ten weeks while another group wrote about irritations. The study found that the group that wrote about gratitude reported more optimistic mindsets in their lives[1].

        Overall, having a gratitude list improved well-being and made one truly grateful by counting the blessings in their lives.

        Write a list of what you are grateful for if you had a bad day. Make it as long as you like, but also remember to note why you’re grateful for each thing you write.

        What has given you the most joy? What has set you up for better days? Keep a tally of triumphs in mind, especially when you do have the bad days.

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        The day doesn’t define you, and you still have things of value that surround you. These could be material things, spiritual connections and experiences, relationships, basic needs, emotional and mental well-being, physical health, progress towards hopes and dreams, or simply being alive.

        Here are some other simple ways to practice gratitude.

        2. Write in a Journal

        Journaling affects your overall mental health, which also affects physical health and aids in the management of stress, depression, anxiety, and more[2].

        All you need is a pen and paper, or you could do an online, password-protected journal such as Penzu. The key is to get started and not pressure yourself on how polished or perfect it is. You don’t need to have prior experience to start journal writing. Just start.

        Write out everything that is bothering you for 15 minutes. This helps with rumination, processing problems, and can even aid with brainstorming solutions.

        However you approach it, you can find patterns of thinking that no longer serve you and start to transform your overall mental state. This will impact all areas of your life and is a great coping skill.

        3. Meditate

        Meditation can help you overcome negative thought patterns, worrying about the future, dwelling on the past, or struggling to overcome a bad day[3]. It shifts your mentality and helps you focus on the present or any one thing you truly want to focus on.

        Here is an example of a meditation you can do:

        Get into a comfortable position. Close your eyes. Rest your body, release tension, and unclench your jaw. Tighten and release each muscle group in a body scan for progressive muscle relaxation.

        Focus on your breath, taking a few deep breaths. Let your belly expand when you breathe in for diaphragmatic breathing. Empty yourself completely of air, then return to normal breathing.

        Next, focus on the idea of self-love and let it erase negative thoughts. Think about the ways you’ve been judging yourself, with the narratives coming up that your mind may create.

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        Give yourself unconditional love and release judgment. Take your time meditating on this because you matter. This is particularly important if you had a bad day.

        Check out this article for more on how to get started with a meditation practice.

        4. Do Child’s Pose

        Yoga Outlet says:

        “Child’s Pose is a simple way to calm your mind, slow your breath, and restore a feeling of peace and safety. Practicing the pose before bedtime can help to release the worries of the day. Practicing in the morning can you help transition from sleeping to waking.”[4]

        When you do Child’s Pose, it can be between difficult positions in yoga, or it can be anytime you feel you need a rest. It helps you recover from difficulties and relax the mind.

        It also has the physical health benefits of elongating your back, opening your hips, and helping with digestion[5].

        To do Child’s Pose, rest your buttocks back on your feet, knees on the floor. Elongate your body over your knees with both arms extended or tucked back, with head and neck resting on the floor[6].

        Had a bad day? Try Child's Pose.

           

          Do this pose as a gift to yourself. You are allowing yourself to heal, rest, get time for yourself, recover, and recharge. When you’ve had a bad day, it’s there waiting for you.

          5. Try Positive Self-Talk

          Engage in positive self-talk. This is essentially choosing your thoughts.

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          When you have a negative thought, such as “I can’t do this,” replace it consciously with the thought “I can do this.” Give yourself positive affirmations to help with this.

          Negative self-talk fits into four general categories: personalizing or blaming yourself, magnifying or only focusing on the negative, catastrophizing or expecting the worst to happen, and polarizing or only seeing back and white[7].

          When you stop blaming yourself for everything and start focusing on the positive, expecting things to work out, and seeing the areas of grey in life, you reverse these negative mindsets and engage in positive self-talk.

          When you speak words of kindness to yourself, your brain responds with a more positive attitude. That attitude will affect everything you do. It’s how you take care of yourself if you had a bad day.

          Check in with yourself to know when you are having negative self-talk. Are you seeing patterns? When did they start to become a problem? Are you able to turn these thoughts around?

          6. Use Coping Skills and Take a Break

          Use your coping skills. This means not letting your thoughts take control of yourself.

          You can distract yourself and escape a bit. Do things you love. You can exercise, listen to music, dance, volunteer or help someone, be in nature, or read a book.

          It isn’t about repression. It’s about redirection. You can’t stay in thoughts that are no longer working for you.

          Sometimes, it’s okay to get out of your own way. Give yourself a break from the things going on in your head. You can always come back to a problem later. This may even help you figure out the best course of action as sometimes stepping away is the only way to see the solution.

          If you had a bad day, you may not feel like addressing what went wrong. You may need a break, so take one.

          7. If a Bad Day Turns Into Bad Days

          “I believe depression is legitimate. But I also believe that if you don’t exercise, eat nutritious food, get sunlight, get enough sleep, consume positive material, surround yourself with support, then you aren’t giving yourself a fighting chance.” –Jim Carrey

          If you’ve been feeling out of control, depressed, or unstable for more than a few weeks, it’s time to call a mental health professional. This is not because you have failed in any way. It’s because you are human, and you simply need help.

          You may not be able to quickly rebound from a bad day, and that’s fine. Feel what you feel, but don’t let it consume you.

          When you talk to a professional, share the techniques that you have already tried here and whether they were helpful. They may tell you additional ideas or gain insights from your struggles of not being able to rebound from a series of bad days.

          If you’re having more than just a bad day, they will want to know. If you don’t have the answers, that’s okay, too. You just need to try these tools and figure out how you’re feeling. That’s all that’s required of you.

          Keep taking care of yourself. Any progress is progress, no matter how small. Give yourself a chance to get better by reaching out.

          Final Thoughts

          If you had a bad day, don’t let it stop you.

          Know this: It’s okay not to be okay. You have a right to feel what you feel. But there is something you can do about it.

          You can invest in yourself via self-care.

          You are not alone in this. Everyone has bad days from time to time. You just need to know that you are the positive things you tell yourself.

          More Things You Can Do If You Had a Bad Day

          Featured photo credit: Anthony Tran via unsplash.com

          Reference

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