Anytime I see any version of “no drama” on someone’s social media profile, I automatically assume they’re full of drama. You create your own drama in life, so, if you’re sick of life dramas, you’re doing it to yourself. Stop hitting yourself and take 10 steps toward a drama-free life.
1. Avoid Giving Unsolicited Advice
I’m sure you know the exact way to fix everyone’s problems. You could single-handedly solve world hunger, bridge the income gap, and enact world peace. The reality is you have no idea what you’re talking about, and even if you do, nobody’s interested unless they’re directly asking you. Keep your advice to yourself, and you’ll avoid a lot of unnecessary drama.
2. Know Your Limits
People have a tendency to over-commit themselves. When you have too many commitments, you can’t focus everything you should on all of them. Things fall by the wayside, and you become a flake, no matter how hard you try. If you keep falling short of peoples’ expectations, they’ll all end up “against” you, and you’ll find yourself surrounded by drama.
3. Mind Your Beeswax
It’s ok to socialize with people, but keep your nose out of other people’s business. If the treatment of whistle-blowers like Edward Snowden and Chelsea Manning have taught us anything, it’s people get overly dramatic when their secrets are leaked. Avoid the drama by minding your own business.
4. Speak Honestly
Lies are annoying – they fill your mind with all this extra gibberish. When you lie to people, you create your own unnecessary drama that could’ve easily been avoided. It’s a conscious choice you’re making to lie, and the lies will unravel sooner or later. Avoid the drama of covering the truth and the drama when it’s revealed you lied by speaking honestly.
5. Focus On Yourself
If you’re focused on getting ahead in your goals, you won’t even notice the drama. You’ll be so zoned in on your own future all the side-drama just fades into the background. It becomes as important to you as the suffering of all those starving children in Africa and abused pets Sarah McLachlan sings about.
6. Learn To Say No
People will ask you a lot of questions. If you’re asked if you know something, deny it. Don’t try to say it in a way they know you know but can’t say so you feel important or special – just deny it. Don’t get involved. It’s that simple. And if someone you don’t want to talk to texts you with drama, don’t respond. They’ll get bored with it sooner or later.
7. Stop Gossip
I’m no gossip, but I heard Sandy tell John she overheard Bill and Katie talking about how Frank is. Gossip is a two-way street. It’s all well and good to tell everyone about how someone else gossips, but that makes you a gossip. The listener is a gossip, too. You don’t get to project your downfalls on others to absolve yourself from responsibility.
When you smile, you become the center of the room. You end up in the driver’s seat. If people come to you with drama, you can steer the conversation elsewhere. They’ll follow you because you seem more confident. If they don’t, you can confidently ignore them and walk away. No more drama.
9. Be Compassionate
A lot of so-called “drama” in life is really due to the way you’re reacting. People have problems, and sometimes they need to vent. Everyone vents, and you can be compassionate to all of them. It’s possible to listen to peoples’ problems as a courtesy. You don’t have to truly listen if you don’t want to, but at the very least give the impression that you are. It’s a temporary situation, and, if it’s that uncomfortable to you, you can avoid it the next time.
Life will always have drama – it’s unavoidable. Instead of letting it get to you, meditate. You’ll never find that fairy tale “happily ever after” life where everything is easy. The richest and poorest, youngest and oldest, biggest and smallest of us, have problems. The grass on both sides of the fence needs constant watering, weeding and mowing.
Featured photo credit: Matheus Ferrero via unsplash.com