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Avoid Life Dramas With These Tips

Avoid Life Dramas With These Tips

Anytime I see any version of “no drama” on someone’s social media profile, I automatically assume they’re full of drama. You create your own drama in life, so, if you’re sick of life dramas, you’re doing it to yourself. Stop hitting yourself and take 10 steps toward a drama-free life.

1. Avoid Giving Unsolicited Advice

    I’m sure you know the exact way to fix everyone’s problems. You could single-handedly solve world hunger, bridge the income gap, and enact world peace. The reality is you have no idea what you’re talking about, and even if you do, nobody’s interested unless they’re directly asking you. Keep your advice to yourself, and you’ll avoid a lot of unnecessary drama.

    2. Know Your Limits

      People have a tendency to over-commit themselves. When you have too many commitments, you can’t focus everything you should on all of them. Things fall by the wayside, and you become a flake, no matter how hard you try. If you keep falling short of peoples’ expectations, they’ll all end up “against” you, and you’ll find yourself surrounded by drama.

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      3. Mind Your Beeswax

        It’s ok to socialize with people, but keep your nose out of other people’s business. If the treatment of whistle-blowers like Edward Snowden and Chelsea Manning have taught us anything, it’s people get overly dramatic when their secrets are leaked. Avoid the drama by minding your own business.

        4. Speak Honestly

          Lies are annoying – they fill your mind with all this extra gibberish. When you lie to people, you create your own unnecessary drama that could’ve easily been avoided. It’s a conscious choice you’re making to lie, and the lies will unravel sooner or later. Avoid the drama of covering the truth and the drama when it’s revealed you lied by speaking honestly.

          5. Focus On Yourself

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            If you’re focused on getting ahead in your goals, you won’t even notice the drama. You’ll be so zoned in on your own future all the side-drama just fades into the background. It becomes as important to you as the suffering of all those starving children in Africa and abused pets Sarah McLachlan sings about.

            6. Learn To Say No

              People will ask you a lot of questions. If you’re asked if you know something, deny it. Don’t try to say it in a way they know you know but can’t say so you feel important or special – just deny it. Don’t get involved. It’s that simple. And if someone you don’t want to talk to texts you with drama, don’t respond. They’ll get bored with it sooner or later.

              7. Stop Gossip

                I’m no gossip, but I heard Sandy tell John she overheard Bill and Katie talking about how Frank is. Gossip is a two-way street. It’s all well and good to tell everyone about how someone else gossips, but that makes you a gossip. The listener is a gossip, too. You don’t get to project your downfalls on others to absolve yourself from responsibility.

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                8. Smile

                  When you smile, you become the center of the room. You end up in the driver’s seat. If people come to you with drama, you can steer the conversation elsewhere. They’ll follow you because you seem more confident. If they don’t, you can confidently ignore them and walk away. No more drama.

                  9. Be Compassionate

                    A lot of so-called “drama” in life is really due to the way you’re reacting. People have problems, and sometimes they need to vent. Everyone vents, and you can be compassionate to all of them. It’s possible to listen to peoples’ problems as a courtesy. You don’t have to truly listen if you don’t want to, but at the very least give the impression that you are. It’s a temporary situation, and, if it’s that uncomfortable to you, you can avoid it the next time.

                    10. Meditate

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                      Life will always have drama – it’s unavoidable. Instead of letting it get to you, meditate. You’ll never find that fairy tale “happily ever after” life where everything is easy. The richest and poorest, youngest and oldest, biggest and smallest of us, have problems. The grass on both sides of the fence needs constant watering, weeding and mowing.

                      Suck it up…

                      Featured photo credit: clipart via clipartbest.com

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                      Last Updated on October 17, 2019

                      How to Spend More Quality Time with Your Partner

                      How to Spend More Quality Time with Your Partner

                      You see your partner every single day. They are the first person you talk to in the morning and the last person you kiss goodnight.

                      But does seeing each other day in and day out equal a healthy relationship? Not necessarily.

                      Spending quality time with your partner is the best way to ensure your relationship stays healthy and strong. This means going above and beyond sitting together while you watch Netflix or going out for the occasional dinner. You deserve more from your relationship – and so does your spouse!

                      What does quality time mean? It means spending time with your spouse without interruption. It’s a chance for you to come together and talk. Communication will build emotional intimacy and trust.

                      Quality time is also about expressing love in a physical way. Not sex, necessarily (but that’s great, too!) but through hand-holding, cuddling, caressing, and tickling. Studies show that these displays of affection will boost partner satisfaction.[1]

                      So how do you spend quality time with your partner? Here are 13 relationship tips on making the most out of your time with your partner.

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                      1. Recognize the Signs

                      If you want a healthy relationship, you have to learn how to recognize the signs that you need to spend more quality time together.

                      Some telltale signs include:

                      • You’re always on your phones.
                      • You value friendships or hobbies over quality time with your spouse.
                      • You aren’t together during important events.
                      • You are arguing more often or lack connection.
                      • You don’t make plans or date nights.
                      • You’re not happy.

                      If you are experiencing any of these relationship symptoms, know that quality time together can reverse the negative effects of the signs above.

                      2. Try New Things Together

                      Have you ever wanted to learn how to play an instrument or speak another language? How about skydive or ballroom dance?

                      Instead of viewing these as solo hobbies and interests, why not involve your partner?

                      Trying new activities together builds healthy relationships because it encourages spouses to rely on one another for emotional and physical support.

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                      Shared hobbies also promote marital friendship, and the Journal of Happiness Studies found that marital satisfaction was twice as high for couples who viewed each other as best friends.[2]

                      3. Schedule in Tech-Free Time

                      Your phone is a great way to listen to music, watch videos, and keep up-to-date with friends and family. But is your phone good for your relationship?

                      Many couples phone snub, or ‘phub’, one another. Studies show that phubbing can lower relationship satisfaction and increase one’s chances of depression.[3]

                      Reduce those chances by removing distractions when spending quality time together and showing your partner they have your full attention.

                      4. Hit the Gym as a Couple

                      One way you can spend more time together as a couple is by becoming workout partners. Studies show that couples are more likely to stay with their exercise routine if they work out together.[4] Couples also work out harder than they would solo. One study found that 95 percent of couples who work out together maintained weight loss compares to the 66 percent of singles who did.[5]

                      Join a gym, do at-home couples’ workouts, try couples yoga, hit the hiking trails, or get your bikes out. No matter which way you choose to exercise, these healthy activities can promote a healthy relationship.

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                      5. Cook Meals Together

                      Pop open a bottle of wine or put some romantic music on while you get busy – in the kitchen, of course!

                      One of the best relationship tips for spending quality time together when you both have busy schedules is to cook meals together.[6]

                      Spice things up and try and prepare a four-course meal or a fancy French dish together. Not only is this a fun way to spend your time together, but it also promotes teamwork.

                      If all goes well, you’ll have a romantic date night meal at home that you prepared with your four hands. And if the food didn’t turn out the way you’d hoped, you are guaranteed to have a laugh and create new memories together.

                      6. Have a Regular Date Night

                      Couples experience a greater sense of happiness and less stress when they are spending quality time together.[7] One of the biggest relationship tips for a healthy partnership is to include a date night in your weekly routine.

                      The National Marriage Project found that having a weekly date night can make your relationship seem more exciting and helps prevent relationship boredom.[8] It also lowers the probability of divorce, improves your sex life, and increases healthy communication.

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                      Some great ideas for what to do on your date night include:

                      • Have a movie marathon – Gather up your favorite flicks and cuddle up on the couch.
                      • Play games together – Cards, board games, video games, and other creative outlets are a fun way to spend quality time together.
                      • Recreate your first date – Go back to that restaurant and order the same meal you did when you first got together. You can spice up your evening by pretending you’re strangers meeting for the first time and see how sexy the night gets.
                      • Plan a weekend getaway – There’s nothing better than traveling with the one you love.
                      • Dinner and a movie – A classic!
                      • Try a new restaurant – Make it your mission to rate and try all of the Mexican restaurants/Irish pubs/Italian trattorias in your area.
                      • Have a long sex session – Intimacy promotes the release of the oxytocin hormone which is responsible for a myriad of great feelings.[9]

                      Here’re even more date night ideas for your reference: 50 Unique and Really Fun Date Ideas for Couples

                      Final Thoughts

                      The benefits of spending quality time together are endless. Here are just some of the ways it can contribute to a healthy relationship:

                      • Improves emotional and physical intimacy
                      • Lowers divorce rates
                      • Improves communication
                      • Reduces marital boredom
                      • Bonds couples closer
                      • Improves friendship
                      • Boosts health
                      • Reduces stress

                      These are all excellent reasons to start making date night a regular part of your week.

                      It’s easy to have a healthy relationship when you set aside dedicated time to share with your spouse. Try new things together, make your spouse your workout buddy, and look for innovative ways to be close and connected.

                      These relationship tips will bring great benefits to your marriage.

                      Featured photo credit: Allen Taylor via unsplash.com

                      Reference

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