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9 Things Only People With Albinism Would Understand

9 Things Only People With Albinism Would Understand

If you or a loved one suffers from albinism, you can be sure that you will have come across ignorance, misunderstanding, fear, and prejudice. The same old story. If you are different, you are picked on, teased, bullied and often excluded socially. Perhaps albinism gets far too much attention because white skin and hair is so different, especially if you are living in Africa. Here are 9 things that you can relate to if you suffer from this disease.

1. You wish people were better informed.

You and I know that albinism is a very rare disease. It is estimated that only 1 in 17,000 in the USA are born with this genetic defect. It is simply a lack of melanin which normally adds color to skin and hair. Because of this deficiency in melanin, albinos have very fair or white hair and also white skin. Albinos may have problems with eyesight and may have only 20/100 vision. They have to be very careful in the sun and wear sunblock. They may also suffer from photophobia which is an extreme sensitivity to light. But, apart from that, they are perfectly normal. If people were better informed, they might start to treat you like a normal human being.

2. You wish people would stop staring.

This becomes extremely irritating. If people can accept different races and different body shapes, why on earth cannot they take an albino on board? This was the question that Megan Palmer, a 16 year old albino who is also a filmmaker, wanted to address. She felt there was an urgent need to educate people so that they would stop gawking. Her short film on albinism was nominated for four awards at the THIMUN Qatar Film Festival.

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Megan has already achieved some of her objectives in that her film has gone viral on YouTube and is raising awareness about a forgotten minority. The characters in the film all talk about their difficulties and frustrations in living with albinism. It is a very moving tribute to their courage and persistence.

3. You wish filmmakers would stop portraying albino villains and weirdoes.

Nothing wrong with starring albinos in films but so far these have been almost all very negative portrayals. This only adds to the miscomprehension and intolerance. Have you seen The Da Vinci Code, for example? You may remember Silas, the albino monk who practises severe corporal mortification. What about the albino twins in The Matrix Reloaded? It seems that Hollywood has a penchant for portraying several albino characters who are evil, ruthless, and violent assassins. Name me one famous film with a normal, sympathetic or funny albino! The claim that many albino villains have saved some lousy films from oblivion is hardly a compliment.

4. You wish people would stop wanting to touch your hair.

In Megan Palmer’s film, several of the albino people talk about how disturbing it is to have people approach them and ask to touch their hair. Why would people want to touch your hair? They do not want to touch people with red hair for instance! These people are ignorant and although they may be seeking information, they are often unaware of their insensitivity.

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5. You wish schools would help more.

When parents of children with albinism fill in an Education Plan or IEP, they are signalling that their children need extra help in the classroom. Teachers usually ensure that large print copies of textbooks and worksheets are available. But some children can manage quite well with proper reading glasses which can also help to correct astigmatism.Children may find that hand-held monocular devices and other magnifying aids are helpful.

The major problems arise when children have to socialize. Teasing and bullying are all too common, unfortunately. You feel that schools could do a lot more in making children aware of differences in ability and appearance and how to behave accordingly.

“I was insulted, harassed and tortured by my peers at school and during play.” – John Makumbe

6. You wish people were more aware of what is happening in Africa.

Ignorance and superstition in Tanzania and East Africa have now resulted in albinos being murdered! Estimates say that the rate of albinism in Tanzania is 1 in 2,000. It is a terrible tragedy because people believe that the bones and even the skin of albinos have magical properties. Some people believe that HIV and cancer can be cured by using the body parts. In addition, the albinos can rarely go out in the sun because of the risk of skin cancer. Their life expectancy is also much shorter than in western countries and many albinos die in their early thirties.

“To some of our African communities they think it’s a curse – having such a child.” – Jotham Makoha

7. You wish people did not place such a high value on labels.

Unfortunately, our society wants to label any difference or handicap from early childhood. The stigma of having a label slapped on you is so unfair. Labels such as ADHD, disabled, albino or the more general SEN (special educational needs) tend to exclude children. They emphasize the condition, rather than the person. Yes, the schools are catering for their needs but this should be a totally seamless process so that all children are included and will never be a target for abuse. Teaching children to be tolerant and supportive of differences should be one of the main pillars of the educational system.

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8. You wish people would not ask such personal questions.

Whether you are a child or an adult with albinism, you will always be asked the wrong question, which is usually highly insensitive or obnoxious. People will try to see if your eyes are red because there is a stupid belief that this is the case. If only they knew! The fact is the light passing through the translucent iris means that a person may be seeing the actual blood vessels underneath. Most people with albinism have blue eyes but some have brown or hazel eyes. Then, some people even ask if you can see in the dark!

Some people will tease in a rather affectionate way but this very much depends whether the albino has a positive self image or not. It can be a useful starting point though for telling people the facts about albinism.

9. You wish there was more support and positive coverage in the media.

Coping with total ignorance, superstition and prejudice can be tough for the person with albinism. Myths abound. People will say that an albino can live for ever and that he or she is not really human! They are even afraid of touching an albino because they will be cursed.

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In order to counter that, many organisations and support groups for people with albinism are working hard to get a positive and accurate message out. Information needs to be provided and the media should be doing more in this regard. Many people with albinism have found great support from these charities and have benefited enormously. Now, if the media gave those organisations more coverage that would be great.

Featured photo credit: Sanne de Wild via lensculture.com

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Robert Locke

Author of Ziger the Tiger Stories, a health enthusiast specializing in relationships, life improvement and mental health.

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Published on October 7, 2019

4 Types of Toxic People and How to Deal with Them

4 Types of Toxic People and How to Deal with Them

Can a person really be toxic? Well, a toxic person does not refer to those who are affected by the virus or toxic. To be precise, toxic people are those who are very unsupportive, abusive and unhealthy in nature. Their behavior is filled with venom and you will not feel any sort of gentle breeze in their words.

In this article, you will learn how to spot out a toxic person, and what you can do to deal with them.

Signs of Toxic People

To make it more obvious, I have added some signs of toxic people below.

Manipulative Behavior And Fabricated Mind

Toxic people are unable to deal with the bitter truth firmly. If you are going to blurt out their fabrications with proof, they will try to change the whole matter with their manipulative behavior. They will titillate you with sensitive words or they will try to frighten you to get rid of the problems.

Inhuman And Merciless in Nature

We know that sharing our thoughts with friends will keep us in good mental state. But, if you are not getting fruitful outcomes, you have to understand that you are spending time with toxic friends.

Toxic people do not know how to put themselves in other’s shoes. They just put on a mask of simplicity. But, in reality, they don’t have feelings for you. Therefore, you should stop sharing your valuable time with them as you will get nothing except annoyance and silence.

Hypocrisy at Its Best in Their Nature

Toxic people have a great hunger for respect, adoration, and fidelity. After dignifying them with these valuable elements, you will get nothing; you will be cheated, manipulated and criticized by them. And, if you are not willing to listen to them, you will be controlled by guilt-tripping.

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Emotional Outburst And Pathological Excuses

Toxic people always want to see themselves in the positive end. Therefore, to get their job done, they always have an emotional outburst and emotional excuse to make an impulsive impression upon you.

We do mistakes and it is our duty to accept those mistakes. But, toxic people have their own rules, they have a tendency to present themselves rationally even after committing a mistake. If someone tries to expose themselves with facts, they show no embarrassment and use emotional excuses as a shield.

Play with Your Emotion And Gradually Erode It

Toxic people always try to condescend you with critical jokes and when you try to elicit your thoughts, they just burst out laughing. Teasing becomes an important element in your relationship with toxic person. They even give you backhanded compliments to belittle you.

Thus, using their toxic mindset, they just gradually diminish your abilities as well as intelligence. And you will have nothing left in your hand other than putting up with these things to maintain the silence.

Well, you probably might have not seen all these signs in one person as there are different types of toxic people roaming around you.

4 Types of Toxic People

To understand it better, I’m mentioning the different types of toxic people here.

1. Conversational Narcissist

There are some toxic people who do not know how to give importance to others. They will talk about themselves but never ask you about your condition; they will only recall you when they need you or they are facing some sort of problems.

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2. Emotional Vampires

These vampires do not suck your blood but dissipate your emotion. They always talk negatively about everyone and compel you to think in the same pattern that they follow. They mask themselves in such a way in front of you that you gradually start giving importance to them. But, ultimately, you will not get any positive outcome from them.

3. Monsters with Green eyes

As discussed earlier, toxic people will give you backhanded compliments. Basically, these are called monsters with green eyes. These monsters feel happy when you feel sad. Therefore, they will always try to belittle your achievements, intelligence, and strengths. Along with it, they give compliments with some negativity in it.

4. Black-Eyed Cats

These cats always do mew-mew and try to control everything around them. They love to be pampered but, they do not like if someone goes against them.

If you are in a relationship with such persons, you will be nagged until you are giving them complete satisfaction. In a nutshell, it must be said that you have to align yourself with them if you want to live with them. But, ultimately, you will lose your mental, conversational and emotional freedom.

How to Deal with Toxic People

Living with problems is more convenient than living with toxic people. But, toxic people are parasites and therefore, you will see these monsters rambling around you wherever you go.

However, if you know how to deal with them, it would be very helpful for you and your life would be much easier to live. We have added some tips to assist you, just check these out.

Get Rid of Intermittent Reinforcement

We are very optimistic in nature and over the time, this optimism has reached to such a level that we can happily put up with the ‘close losses’ instead of trying to catch the ‘near wins’.

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B.F Skinner once did an experiment with three rats. He put them in different cages attached with levers. The lever delivered food when it was pressed. In the 1st cage, the lever always delivered food when the rat pressed it. In case of the 2nd cage, food was never delivered by the lever even after pressing it, therefore, the rat understood the lesson and never tried to get food. But, in the third cage, the lever delivered food randomly and as a result, the rat was completely hooked and fixated. He constantly pushed it but didn’t get the food always.

Well, this is called intermittent relationship and the same thing happens in human relationships where toxic people give you intermittent reinforcement and your heart gets pumped up with optimism. As a result, you will be hooked and your life will be fixated at some point with toxic people.

You should learn to move on without them and live your life happily because random happiness cannot bring permanent relief.

Never Make Too Many Allowances And Pardons

Well, sympathetic attitude is very good and it is also a fact that sometimes toxic people suffer from genuine depression, physical as well as mental illness. But, you have to set a boundary and you cannot allow people to get away with anything so easily.

If you make too many allowances as well as pardons, it would not be good for you in the long-term. Yes, there are some people who are facing extreme hardships and they are not even toxic in nature. But, all you can do is show some genuine compassion keeping yourself within the boundaries.

Always Try to Ignore Their Toxic Traps

Demotivational words are the primary weapon that they frequently use in their implications to detract you. Along with this, they throw words in such a way that you start feeling guilty. Well, you must understand that these are just toxic traps and you should not step on it.

Always remember that you will have full access to freedom if you stop taking things personally. They not only do this with you but also with everyone. You just have to keep in mind that these toxic words are not based on truth but on their own mental reproduction. So, you just have to ignore this and focus on your work.

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Show Them Your Beautiful Smile Not the Curves on Your Forehead

Toxic people have an aptitude to attack mentally, mock disgracefully and diminish shamefully. But, you will not be affected if you don’t surrender yourself. Show them that you are not getting belittled or insulted.

We all have our problems and we also know that we are capable of solving these problems. Therefore, the matter entirely depends upon us and if we don’t allow these vampires to enter into our life or play with our emotions, they cannot suck our happiness. So, I’d suggest you show your beautiful smile when they buzz around you.

Don’t Suppress Yourself

Toxic people will intimidate, bully, pass guilt, and forcefully take money from you to get their job done. They know very well that they are doing wrong and at the same time, they are acquainted with the concept that we are incapable of doing anything against them.

Most of the time, we keep ourselves quiet until someone speaks up. And because of this suppressive mindset, we are gradually being dragged into their mind games.

Well, we have to change this concept as it infuses courage into them. We need to obstruct them with firm minds and make them realize the negative consequences of their behavior.[1] If they are upsetting you, just tell them directly. Your direct statement might open a new gate of opportunity that will allow you to help them if they are suffering from genuine problems.

So, why are you still tolerating these toxic people? Follow the tips mentioned above and deal with them in the right way.

Featured photo credit: Devin Avery via unsplash.com

Reference

[1] Tips for Grooming: Change Your Fixed Negative Belief

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