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8 Ways You Can Learn to Deal with Jealousy

8 Ways You Can Learn to Deal with Jealousy

Whether you envy someone because of his high metabolism, corner office, house on the lake, or latest solo travel to an exotic country, jealousy can throw you off your game, squander your energy, and generate angst for yourself.

Below are 8 surefire ways you can deal with jealousy to minimize its draining effects and harness its power:

1. Develop an Abundance Mindset

When you have a mindset of scarcity, it’s hard to appreciate others’ gains. If you believe there are limited pieces of the pie to go around, you’ll obsess over protecting your share and worry over what others have.

But with an abundance mindset, you can freely celebrate another person’s accomplishment and look for ways to make the pie bigger. Acting from a place of abundance heightens your level of satisfaction and adds to others’ sense of fulfillment.

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2. Learn From Those Who Have Made It

If someone else was able to obtain the thing you covet, chances are, so can you. Another person’s success usually means the goal is possible and the dream is attainable.

Study what they did to get where they are. Decide how you can tweak tactics, update strategies, improve the process, and make the journey easier for yourself.

3. Acknowledge That You Have Something Unique to Contribute

Being aware of your personal strengths and gifts encourages you to make your mark, irrespective of what others do and achieve.

No one else has the exact same combination of talents, skills and knowledge that you have. Share your unique ideas and apply your individual experiences to create what you want and optimize what you have.

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4. Stop Comparing Yourself to Others

Act like you have a lot going for you, even if you believe the next person has more. Reflect on your past success and future potential, and stop dwelling on how you stack up against those you envy.

Capitalize on what you already have instead of brood over what you’re missing. Strive to be at the top of your own game, rather than try to out-do others.

5. Get Your Act Together

Jealousy can be a reminder of a dream or goal that you placed on the back-burner, but still desire. If this is why you feel envy, start getting your act together.

Acknowledge that most people worked diligently toward what they have. Take small, doable steps to achieve what you want. Let go of what’s not working.

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6. Determine if What the Other Person Has is What You Really Want

Are you feeling jealous of others due to peer pressure, societal expectations or family obligations? Do you really need the big house, luxury car, fancy corner office, or rich and famous friends to have a fulfilling and purposeful life?

What seems to make one person happy might not have the same effects for you. Success doesn’t have to mean fitting in with the mainstream, standing out from the crowd, acquiring material possessions, or having external accomplishments.

7. Realize That Another Person’s Success Doesn’t Make You a Failure

Individuals make progress at different paces and reach milestones on their own time. Just because one person reached the finish line before you did in one race doesn’t mean you can’t or won’t win the next race.

Starting the race or crossing the finish line is an accomplishment in and of itself. Don’t make someone else’s success devalue your sense of personal progress and individual achievement.

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8. Understand That Jealousy is a Normal, Universal Emotion

People get jealous for all sorts of reasons, including fear and insecurity, the need to protect core interests, and the desire for a more joyful life.

Once you accept that jealousy is a natural emotion, you can consciously choose how to act on it. You don’t have to pout, stomp around, slam doors, throw a pity party, or withdraw from the world. Jealousy gets the better of you only if you let it.

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Last Updated on July 18, 2019

What Makes People Happy? 20 Secrets of “Always Happy” People

What Makes People Happy? 20 Secrets of “Always Happy” People

Some people just seem to float through life with a relentless sense of happiness – through the toughest of times, they’re unfazed and aloof, stopping to smell the roses and drinking out of a glass half full.

They may not have much to be happy about, but the simplicity behind that fact itself may make them happy.

It’s all a matter of perspective, conscious effort and self-awareness. Listed below are a number of reasons why some people are always happy.

1. They Manage Their Expectations

They’re not crushed when they don’t get what they want – or misled into expecting to get the most out of every situation. They approach every situation pragmatically, hoping for the best but being prepared for the worst.

2. They Don’t Set Unrealistic Standards

Similar to the last point, they don’t live their lives in a constant pursuit towards impossible visions of perfection, only to always find themselves falling short of what they want.

3. They Don’t Take Anything for Granted

Happiness rests with feeling fulfilled – those who fail to stop and appreciate what they have every now and again will never experience true fulfillment.

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4. They’re Not Materialistic

There are arguing viewpoints on whether or not money can really buy happiness; if it can, then we know from experience that we can never be satisfied because there will always be something newer or better that we want. Who has ever had enough money?

5. They Don’t Dwell

They don’t sweat the small things or waste time worrying about things that don’t really matter at the end of the day. They don’t let negative thoughts latch onto them and drain them or distract them. Life’s too short to worry.

6. They Care About Themselves First

They’re independent, care for themselves and understand that they must put their needs first in order to accommodate the needs of others.

They indulge, aim to get what they want, make time for themselves and are extremely self-reliant.

7. They Enjoy the Little Things

They stop to smell the roses. They’re accustomed to find serenity when it’s available, to welcome entertainment or a stimulating discussion with a stranger when it crosses their path. They don’t overlook the small things in life that can be just as important.

8. They Can Adapt

They’re not afraid of change and they work to make the most out of new circumstances, good or bad. They thrive under pressure, are not overwhelmed easily and always embrace a change of pace.

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9. They Experiment

They try new things, experience new flavors and never shy away from something they have yet to experience. They never order twice from the same menu.

10. They Take Their Time

They don’t unnecessarily rush through life. They work on their own schedule to the extent that they can and maneuver through life at their own relaxing pace.

11. They Employ Different Perspectives

They’re not stuck in one perspective; a loss can result in a new opportunity, hitting rock bottom can mean that there’s no where to go but up.

12. They Seek to Learn

Their constant pursuit of knowledge keeps them inspired and interested in life. They cherish information and are on a life-long quest to learn as much as they can.

13. They Always Have a Plan

They don’t find themselves drifting without purpose. When something doesn’t go as planned, they have a plan for every letter in the alphabet to fall back on.

14. They Give Respect to Get It

They are respectful and, in turn, are seen as respectable; the respect they exude earns them the respect they deserve.

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15. They Consider Every Opportunity

They always have their eyes open for a new road, a new avenue worth exploring. They know how to recognize opportune moments and pounce on them to make the most of every situation. Success is inevitable for them.

16. They Always Seek to Improve

Perpetual self-improvement is the key towards their ongoing thirst for success. Whatever it is they do, they take pride in getting better and better, from social interactions to mundane tasks. Their pursuit at being the best eventually materializes.

17. They Don’t Take Life Too Seriously

They’re not ones to get offended easily over-analyze or complicate matters. They laugh at their own faults and misfortunes.

18. They Live in the Moment

They don’t live for tomorrow or dwell on what may have happened yesterday. Every day is a new opportunity, a new chapter. They live in the now, and in doing so, get the most out of every moment.

You can learn how to do so too: How to Live in the Moment and Stop Worrying About the Past or Future

19. They Say Yes

Much more often than they say no. They don’t have to be badgered to go out, don’t shy away from new opportunities or anything that may seem inconvenient.

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20. They’re Self-Aware

Most important, they’re wholly aware of themselves. They self-reflect and are conscious of their states of mind. If somethings bothering them, they fix it.

We’re all susceptible to feeling down every now and again, but we are all equipped with the necessary solutions that just have to be discovered.

Lack of confidence, inability to feel fulfilled, and susceptibility to stress are all matters that can be controlled through the way we handle our lives and perceive our circumstances.

Learn about How Self-Reflection Gives You a Happier and More Successful Life.

Final Thoughts

The main philosophy employed by the happiest includes the idea that life’s simply too short: life’s too short to let things get you down, to take things for granted, to pursue absolute and unrealistic perfection.

For some, employing these characteristics is a second nature – they do it without knowing. For others, a conscious effort must be put forth every now and again. Self-Awareness is key.

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Featured photo credit: Charles Postiaux via unsplash.com

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