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7 Tips How to Make Friends During College

7 Tips How to Make Friends During College

You can get very lonely in college, even with hundreds or thousands of people around. In fact, it’s been scientifically proven that college is one of the loneliest points in an adults life, especially if the college is not in your hometown.

1. Realize that it’s normal for you to be lonely

The trick here is to not take it personal. Many people do get lonely in their college years, even if they hide it. It has nothing to do with who you are, it’s just a period of your life when the level of loneliness sky rockets.

But there are things you can do. And the first thing, is to consider those emotions of loneliness as normal. If you think you get lonely because there is something wrong with you, you’ll only hide yourself from people, and thus make yourself even lonelier. Whatever you do, don’t isolate yourself further, making the problem worse.

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2. Don’t Compare Yourself With The Most Popular People

If you’re lonely, or lack friends, you’re more likely to compare yourself with the “cool kids.” That’s what the statistics say. If you only compare your social life and the quality of your friendships with the most connected people in campus, you’re doing yourself a disservice.

Instead, look closer. Most people in college don’t have 50 friends who are dying to hang out. Most just have a couple or one friend that they regularly talk to. Most people are bored in college, and actually want some more company.

If you see things from the lens of “it’s all or nothing,” you won’t appreciate the few friendships you could make at first, that would lead to a very happy social life, later on.

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3. Leverage On Commonalities

It’s easier to hang out with people who have things in common with you. E.g. same class, same hatred (or love) for a professor or a course, same hometown, same preferred Tv series, same hobby, etc.

4. Think Outside The Campus

If you want to make friends in college, you have to think outside of it, as well. Avoid keeping the conversations around college stuff, ask and discuss things outside, and make plans outside of that context. Don’t be the sort of buddy they only talk to when they have something to say about college, be a friend they can talk to about anything.

5. Connect People and You’ll Never Be Lonely Again

Even seasoned grown-ups forget this powerful principle. When you bring people together, create plans involving more than one person, and introduce people to each other, everyone just sticks around. You get appreciated for that sense of initiative, and people stick around longer, as a group has more “gravitational power” than you by yourself.

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6. All Doors Open If You’re Humble

I know, conventional advice say that you’re not supposed to be nice, and cockiness is attractive. That’s cute, but in the real world, you get a lot more advantage if you keep your ego at home, and avoid arrogance at all costs. Never let anyone think that you think you’re better than them.

Always assume you’re at the same level (or same social status) than everyone else. When you do that, humble people, arrogant ones, popular, or losers, they all love you. You make them feel comfortable.

7. There’s No Social Skills 101

Do yourself a favor, and make a commitment to learn and sharpen social skills during your college years. It’s your golden opportunity to learn how to make friends, make conversations, have fun, and build long-lasting friendships.

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It’s your golden opportunity to learn what makes someone have a happy social life, no matter what your personality is like. You obviously don’t need to be a loud larger-than-life extrovert to make friends. You need to practice and grow your social skills.

Good luck with making some new friends today.

Featured photo credit: @adam.s195 via secure.flickr.com

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Paul Sanders

A communication expert who tries to help people improve their social skills and make friends anywhere.

How to Keep a Conversation Going and Never Run Out of Things to Say What to Do When You Have No Friends and Feel Lonely 7 Tips How to Make Friends During College 5 Reasons Why Your Social Life Isn’t Improving, And What To Do About It How To Quietly Build A Social Life

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Last Updated on September 17, 2019

10 Simple Ways To Always Think Positive Thoughts

10 Simple Ways To Always Think Positive Thoughts

Positive thinking can lead to a lot of positive change in your life. Developing an optimistic outlook can be good for both your physical and mental health.

But sometimes, certain situations arise in life that makes it hard to keep a positive outlook. Take steps to make positive thinking become more like your second nature and you’ll reap the biggest benefits.

Here are 10 ways to make thinking positive thoughts easy:

1. Spend Time with Positive People

If you surround yourself with constant complainers, their negativity is likely to rub off on you.

Spend time with positive friends and family members to increase the likelihood that their positive thinking habits will become yours too. It’s hard to be negative when everyone around you is so positive.

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2. Take Responsibility for Your Behavior

When you encounter problems and difficulties in life, don’t play the role of the victim. Acknowledge your role in the situation and take responsibility for your behavior.

Accepting responsibility can help you learn from mistakes and prevent you from blaming others unfairly.

3. Contribute to the Community

One of the best ways to feel good about what you have, is to focus on what you have to give.

Volunteer in some manner and give back to the community. Helping others can give you a new outlook on the world and can assist you with positive thinking.

4. Read Positive and Inspirational Materials

Spend time each day reading something that encourages positive thinking. Read the Bible, spiritual material, or inspirational quotes to help you focus on what’s important to you in life. It can be a great way to start and end your day.

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Some recommendations for you:

5. Recognize and Replace Negative Thoughts

You won’t be successful at positive thinking if you’re still plagued by frequent negative thoughts. Learn to recognize and replace thoughts that are overly negative. Often, thoughts that include words like “always” and “never” signal that they aren’t true.

If you find yourself thinking something such as, “I always mess everything up,” replace it with something more realistic such as, “Sometimes I make mistakes but I learn from them.”

There’s no need to make your thoughts unrealistically positive, but instead, make them more realistic.

6. Establish and Work Toward Goals

It’s easier to be positive about problems and setbacks when you have goals that you’re working toward. Goals will give you motivation to overcome those obstacles when you encounter problems along the way. Without clear goals, it’s harder to make decisions and gauge your progress.

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Learn to set SMART goals to help you achieve more.

7. Consider the Consequences of Negativity

Spend some time thinking about the consequences of negative thinking. Often, it can become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

For example, a person who thinks, “I probably won’t get this job interview,” may put less effort into the interview. As a result, he may decrease his chances of getting the job.

Create a list of all the ways negative thinking impacts your life. It likely influences your behavior, your relationships, and your feelings. Then, create a list of the ways in which positive thinking could be beneficial.

8. Offer Compliments to Others

Look for reasons to compliment others. Be genuine in your praise and compliments, but offer it frequently. This will help you look for the good in other people.

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9. Create a Daily Gratitude List

If you start keeping a daily gratitude list, you’ll start noticing exactly how much you have to be thankful for. This can help you focus on the positive in your life instead of thinking about all the bad things that have happened in the day.

Getting in the habit of showing an attitude of gratitude makes positive thinking more of a habit. Here’re 40 Simple Ways To Practice Gratitude.

10. Practice Self-Care

Take good care of yourself and you’ll be more equipped to think positively.

Get plenty of rest and exercise and practice managing your stress well. Taking care of your physical and mental health will provide you with more energy to focus on positive thinking.

Learn about these 30 Self-Care Habits for a Strong and Healthy Mind, Body and Spirit.

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Featured photo credit: DESIGNECOLOGIST via unsplash.com

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