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7 Things Every Couple Should Do To Protect The Relationship From Infidelity

7 Things Every Couple Should Do To Protect The Relationship From Infidelity

Studies show a variety of results on infidelity, but the general consensus is that 30–40% of men and 20–30% of women will cheat on their partner at some point in their relationship. Don’t let those numbers cause despair! You don’t have to be resigned to the fact that you will cheat or be cheated on. Talk to your partner and try these seven things to protect the relationship from infidelity.

1. Be honest with yourself about your weaknesses.

If you go out to a bar with friends and have a few drinks, do you get a little flirty? If so, be honest with yourself. Don’t let yourself drink enough to get to that point, or stay with your group of friends instead of letting your eyes roam. If you play off your weaknesses as just harmless things that happen, you’re more likely to easily write off excuses for further indiscretions. You have to call yourself out on what potentially negative habits you have and keep them in check, otherwise they could pick up steam and turn into a mistake you’re going to regret.

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2. Discuss your boundaries.

Talk with your partner about what fidelity means to you. Does flirting count as cheating? Can they have close friends of the opposite sex? If they talk on the phone for hours with that friend, are you confident that it’s only a friendship? What about reconnecting with exes on social media? Make sure you both want fidelity in the relationship, and set guidelines for what that fidelity entails. If you don’t agree, then you might need to rethink the relationship. Make sure to keep an even playing field – if you think flirting is infidelity when your partner does it, you can’t do it either, even if you know it’s not going anywhere.

3. Avoid tempting situations.

Don’t put yourself in a situation where you’ll be alone with an attractive member of the opposite sex, or where you’ll be drinking without your partner, but with some cute bar patrons. You might think you’ll have no problem turning anything down, but once you’re already in the situation, it’s incredibly easy to keep going with the flow – the flow that might lead to a mistake that ends your relationship! It’s much harder to get yourself out of a tempting situation once it’s started, so it’s best to avoid them completely.

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4. Talk to friends who will hold you accountable.

If you’ve had a fidelity problem in the past, or think you might cheat on your current partner, surround yourself with friends that can help you through. Make sure you trust them completely and know that they won’t just say they’ll help you through, then egg you on once you’re knee deep in the tempting situation.

5. Make better choices.

This goes hand in hand with being honest with yourself about your weaknesses and avoiding tempting situations. Making better choices means you’re consciously making the effort to better yourself and save your relationship. Any time you find yourself in a questionable situation, or having thoughts that might lead you astray, you need to make a decision to stay on track and do what’s best for your relationship.

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6. Don’t keep secrets.

Being honest with your partner is just as important as being honest with yourself. You don’t need to tell your partner every time you think about someone other than them, because that will just hurt their feelings and bruise the relationship, but do tell them if you’re having the thoughts in general. Tell them if you’re worried about going out with certain friends because of the environment and mindset everyone will be in. Don’t keep secrets about things that happened during your work day, even if it involves your attractive coworker. Keeping secrets about even the smallest things makes it easier to keep the big issues quiet, too. Keeping secrets of any kind is the first step towards damaging a relationship that used to be strong.

7. Communicate openly.

Make sure you can communicate openly with your partner. Don’t get angry when they tell you their thoughts and feelings, and let them know you expect them to stay calm when you talk, as well. Tell them whatever’s on your mind regarding yourself, them, your relationship, and your hopes and dreams for the future. Sharing everything and making sure you’re on the same page about your relationship and how it’s progressing will make you feel closer, and feeling closer will make you less inclined to cheat because you’re happy with what you have.

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Featured photo credit: Guian Bolisay via flickr.com

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Last Updated on July 18, 2019

What Makes People Happy? 20 Secrets of “Always Happy” People

What Makes People Happy? 20 Secrets of “Always Happy” People

Some people just seem to float through life with a relentless sense of happiness – through the toughest of times, they’re unfazed and aloof, stopping to smell the roses and drinking out of a glass half full.

They may not have much to be happy about, but the simplicity behind that fact itself may make them happy.

It’s all a matter of perspective, conscious effort and self-awareness. Listed below are a number of reasons why some people are always happy.

1. They Manage Their Expectations

They’re not crushed when they don’t get what they want – or misled into expecting to get the most out of every situation. They approach every situation pragmatically, hoping for the best but being prepared for the worst.

2. They Don’t Set Unrealistic Standards

Similar to the last point, they don’t live their lives in a constant pursuit towards impossible visions of perfection, only to always find themselves falling short of what they want.

3. They Don’t Take Anything for Granted

Happiness rests with feeling fulfilled – those who fail to stop and appreciate what they have every now and again will never experience true fulfillment.

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4. They’re Not Materialistic

There are arguing viewpoints on whether or not money can really buy happiness; if it can, then we know from experience that we can never be satisfied because there will always be something newer or better that we want. Who has ever had enough money?

5. They Don’t Dwell

They don’t sweat the small things or waste time worrying about things that don’t really matter at the end of the day. They don’t let negative thoughts latch onto them and drain them or distract them. Life’s too short to worry.

6. They Care About Themselves First

They’re independent, care for themselves and understand that they must put their needs first in order to accommodate the needs of others.

They indulge, aim to get what they want, make time for themselves and are extremely self-reliant.

7. They Enjoy the Little Things

They stop to smell the roses. They’re accustomed to find serenity when it’s available, to welcome entertainment or a stimulating discussion with a stranger when it crosses their path. They don’t overlook the small things in life that can be just as important.

8. They Can Adapt

They’re not afraid of change and they work to make the most out of new circumstances, good or bad. They thrive under pressure, are not overwhelmed easily and always embrace a change of pace.

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9. They Experiment

They try new things, experience new flavors and never shy away from something they have yet to experience. They never order twice from the same menu.

10. They Take Their Time

They don’t unnecessarily rush through life. They work on their own schedule to the extent that they can and maneuver through life at their own relaxing pace.

11. They Employ Different Perspectives

They’re not stuck in one perspective; a loss can result in a new opportunity, hitting rock bottom can mean that there’s no where to go but up.

12. They Seek to Learn

Their constant pursuit of knowledge keeps them inspired and interested in life. They cherish information and are on a life-long quest to learn as much as they can.

13. They Always Have a Plan

They don’t find themselves drifting without purpose. When something doesn’t go as planned, they have a plan for every letter in the alphabet to fall back on.

14. They Give Respect to Get It

They are respectful and, in turn, are seen as respectable; the respect they exude earns them the respect they deserve.

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15. They Consider Every Opportunity

They always have their eyes open for a new road, a new avenue worth exploring. They know how to recognize opportune moments and pounce on them to make the most of every situation. Success is inevitable for them.

16. They Always Seek to Improve

Perpetual self-improvement is the key towards their ongoing thirst for success. Whatever it is they do, they take pride in getting better and better, from social interactions to mundane tasks. Their pursuit at being the best eventually materializes.

17. They Don’t Take Life Too Seriously

They’re not ones to get offended easily over-analyze or complicate matters. They laugh at their own faults and misfortunes.

18. They Live in the Moment

They don’t live for tomorrow or dwell on what may have happened yesterday. Every day is a new opportunity, a new chapter. They live in the now, and in doing so, get the most out of every moment.

You can learn how to do so too: How to Live in the Moment and Stop Worrying About the Past or Future

19. They Say Yes

Much more often than they say no. They don’t have to be badgered to go out, don’t shy away from new opportunities or anything that may seem inconvenient.

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20. They’re Self-Aware

Most important, they’re wholly aware of themselves. They self-reflect and are conscious of their states of mind. If somethings bothering them, they fix it.

We’re all susceptible to feeling down every now and again, but we are all equipped with the necessary solutions that just have to be discovered.

Lack of confidence, inability to feel fulfilled, and susceptibility to stress are all matters that can be controlled through the way we handle our lives and perceive our circumstances.

Learn about How Self-Reflection Gives You a Happier and More Successful Life.

Final Thoughts

The main philosophy employed by the happiest includes the idea that life’s simply too short: life’s too short to let things get you down, to take things for granted, to pursue absolute and unrealistic perfection.

For some, employing these characteristics is a second nature – they do it without knowing. For others, a conscious effort must be put forth every now and again. Self-Awareness is key.

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Featured photo credit: Charles Postiaux via unsplash.com

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