“Pearls don’t lie on the seashore. If you want one, you must dive for it.”
Life is beautiful once you go out on quests that coincide with your beliefs. This article will provide you with insights and motivate you to pursue the love of your life, rather than merely residing inside your comfort cave with regrets.
1. The future is not obvious.
The future is neither secured nor obvious if you reside in the comfort cave. Change is constantly happening in life; if you resist it by staying inside, you will simply perish. Charles Darwin wrote about “survival of the fittest,” not survival of strongest. Those who adapt to change ultimately survive and achieve their aspirations, so why waste time by residing inside the cave when the future is not promised? Just start your quest in search for eternity or meaning. Nothing is lost except your dreadful fear.Advertising
2. Inaction leads to eventually hating yourself.
Residing inside the comfort cave feels secure at the beginning. But in due course, you will come to hate yourself for your inaction and you may die at the end of a boring life. It’s better to die from living life without regret and shame; the worst predicament you could find yourself in is hating yourself despite knowing this fact and doing nothing about it. Just get up and start the adventurous voyage of life, which you will never be ashamed of, unlike residing in a cave.
3. The journey is worth pursuing.
The journey outside the cave can leave you with many trials and tribulations. It’s definitely not going to be easy, but I can surely say that it’s worth pursuing. All those hurdles in the way make you tough and capable of fighting the uncertainties of life. The pursuit towards happiness is always preceded by harsh truths, so be prepared and cherish the journey. At the end of the day, its not always about destination; the journey matters too.Advertising
4. You may find the treasure.
Joseph Campbell famously says, “The cave you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek.” Treasure could be anything that you truly believe in; it might be your passion toward music, interest in politics, love of art, faith in people, etc. History is full of amazing heroes who challenged the comfort cave and found their treasures. So do not worry—have faith in your heart and plunge into the journey, for we live by faith not by sight.
5. You will grow as a person.
The universe is within you; you cannot discover it unless you grow as a person. The journey outside of the comfort cave gives you a chance to grow spiritually and change accordingly. You cannot expect the world to change and anticipate that the world will change you. Life is full of paradoxes; you can only understand them if you grow within, or else you end up succumbing to the paradoxes in search for answers.Advertising
6. You will discover the purpose of life.
The ultimate purpose of life is not defined by destiny; it has to be discovered by you. It is only possible to discover this purpose by coming out of the comfort cave, for discovery will happen only on the journey. Residing in the comfort cave and contemplating the purpose of life will ensure that the maze always remains unsolved to you. The purpose of life will never be discovered unless you go on a quest for it.
7. You will achieve “Nirvana.”
Buddha describes “Nirvana” as the supreme form of human achievement; it is nothing but a transcendent state of overcoming fear and desire. The journey tests you to the core to overcome the fear of uncertainty and to lose your petty desires in transcendence, along the way of achieving “Nirvana.” The true and transcendent state of mind will be the eternal source of happiness that you have been searching for your entire life.
Featured photo credit: Liam Andrew Cura via s3.amazonaws.com
Last Updated on August 4, 2020
The Gentle Art of Saying No For a Less Stressful Life
It’s a simple fact that you can never be productive if you take on too many commitments — you simply spread yourself too thin and will not be able to get anything done, at least not well or on time.
But requests for your time are coming in all the time — through phone, email, IM or in person. To stay productive, and minimize stress, you have to learn the Gentle Art of Saying No — an art that many people have problems with.
What’s so hard about saying no? Well, to start with, it can hurt, anger or disappoint the person you’re saying “no” to, and that’s not usually a fun task. Second, if you hope to work with that person in the future, you’ll want to continue to have a good relationship with that person, and saying “no” in the wrong way can jeopardize that.
But it doesn’t have to be difficult or hard on your relationship. Here’s how to master the Gentle Art of Saying No:
1. Value Your Time
Know your commitments, and how valuable your precious time is. Then, when someone asks you to dedicate some of your time to a new commitment, you’ll know that you simply cannot do it. And tell them that: “I just can’t right now … my plate is overloaded as it is.”
2. Know Your Priorities
Even if you do have some extra time (which for many of us is rare), is this new commitment really the way you want to spend that time?
For myself, I know that more commitments means less time with my wife and kids, who are more important to me than anything.
3. Practice Saying No
Practice makes perfect. Saying “no” as often as you can is a great way to get better at it and more comfortable with saying the word. And sometimes, repeating the word is the only way to get a message through to extremely persistent people. When they keep insisting, just keep saying no. Eventually, they’ll get the message.
4. Don’t Apologize
A common way to start out is “I’m sorry but …” as people think that it sounds more polite. While politeness is important, apologizing just makes it sound weaker. You need to be firm, and unapologetic about guarding your time.
5. Stop Being Nice
Again, it’s important to be polite, but being nice by saying yes all the time only hurts you. When you make it easy for people to grab your time (or money), they will continue to do it. But if you erect a wall, they will look for easier targets.
Show them that your time is well guarded by being firm and turning down as many requests (that are not on your top priority list) as possible.
6. Say No to Your Boss
Sometimes we feel that we have to say yes to our boss — they’re our boss, right? And if we say “no,” then we look like we can’t handle the work — at least, that’s the common reasoning.
But in fact, it’s the opposite — explain to your boss that by taking on too many commitments, you are weakening your productivity and jeopardizing your existing commitments. If your boss insists that you take on the project, go over your project or task list and ask him/her to re-prioritize, explaining that there’s only so much you can take on at one time.
It’s often much easier to pre-empt requests than to say “no” to them after the request has been made. If you know that requests are likely to be made, perhaps in a meeting, just say to everyone as soon as you come into the meeting,
“Look guys, just to let you know, my week is booked full with some urgent projects and I won’t be able to take on any new requests.”
8. Get Back to You
Instead of providing an answer then and there, it’s often better to tell the person you’ll give their request some thought and get back to them. This will allow you to give it some consideration, and check your commitments and priorities. Then, if you can’t take on the request, simply tell them:
“After giving this some thought, and checking my commitments, I won’t be able to accommodate the request at this time.”
At least you gave it some consideration.
9. Maybe Later
If this is an option that you’d like to keep open, instead of just shutting the door on the person, it’s often better to just say,
“This sounds like an interesting opportunity, but I just don’t have the time at the moment. Perhaps you could check back with me in [give a time frame].”
Next time, when they check back with you, you might have some free time on your hands.
10. It’s Not You, It’s Me
This classic dating rejection can work in other situations. Don’t be insincere about it, though. Often, the person or project is a good one, but it’s just not right for you, at least not at this time.
Simply say so — you can compliment the idea, the project, the person, the organization … but say that it’s not the right fit, or it’s not what you’re looking for at this time. Only say this if it’s true — people can sense insincerity.
More Tips for a Less Stressful Life
- How to Say No When You Feel You Can Only Say Yes
- 30 Self-Care Habits for a Strong and Healthy Mind, Body and Spirit
- How to Declutter Your Life and Reduce Stress (The Ultimate Guide)
Featured photo credit: Kyle Glenn via unsplash.com