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7 Easy Ways To Boost Your Confidence

7 Easy Ways To Boost Your Confidence

1. Stop constantly comparing yourself to others

It is easy in the age of digital media, to be constantly bombarded with snapshots of other people’s ideal lives. Scrolling through your Facebook newsfeed it is hard not to feel discouraged when you see photos of friends on tropical vacations, eating Thai from your favorite restaurant or effortless looking stylish with some of the latest fashion trends. Remind yourself that what may appear on the surface is not the entire picture and comparing yourself to them is not only inaccurate, but a waste of time.

2. Begin with changing what you can control

It is important to really look at your insecurities and estimate if you can realistically change what you dislike about yourself. If it is something physical, like losing weight, create a plan that is reasonable for your abilities and then take baby steps towards your goals. If your lack of confidence is psychological, it is important to look into why you feel this way, possibly with the help of a close friend or professional help in the form of a therapist. If you feel like you have trouble speaking up for instance, pinpoint a moment in your day when you feel like you should stand up for yourself and then encourage yourself to do so. It will be hard in the beginning, but after awhile it will be easier.

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3. Fake it until you make it

It can be very hard to confront your own moments of insecurity and try to act confident when you really feel like you would rather magically disappear from the situation. It is important in moments like these to pretend to have confidence, even when you feel like it is the last thing that defines you. A helpful tip is to go into a private space and put your hands on your hips, with your feet spread apart. This is called the superwoman/man stance and has been proven to help individuals gain more confidence through body language.

4. Remind yourself that the loudest voice in the room is not always the person that has the most confidence

In Western culture we are taught that the volume of your voice is equivalent to a person’s level of confidence. This is not always true because it can just be a way for someone to be mask their own feelings of insecurity. It is important to remember that if you speak with an even tone and do not ask for validation in the form of a question when you speak, then you can still be seen as a confident person. If you are quiet because you lack confidence, practice speaking in front of a mirror every day by yourself and find a tone of voice that you feel comfortable with. Say positive affirmations to yourself and pretty soon you will start believing them.

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5. Push any doubts about yourself to the back of your mind

Everyone, no matter how confident they may seem, has something that they do not like about themselves. The difference between people who appear confident is that they focus on their strengths and not their weaknesses. When you hear the little voice of doubt in your head, practice replacing those doubts with things that you excel in. It may be hard at first, but remember practice makes progress.

6. Stay diligent and consistent in building a more confident version of yourself

It’s important to remember that change takes time and consistent effort. If you don’t feel like you are making progress in a larger scale, focus on smaller accomplishments. One way to notice change is by keeping a record of each day and writing down what you feel you accomplished. Looking back on each day, week and month you will start to notice improvement.

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7. Find a solid support group

When focusing on confidence-building it’s important to have a group of friends, romantic partners and family that are 100 percent behind your goals. If you have anyone who is toxic to your self-improvement and will not support you, then it is important to talk with them about this. Sit down with them face to face and explain how you feel or write them a heartfelt email. If they are still not supportive, than maybe it’s in your best interest to discontinue the relationship.

Featured photo credit: Pixabay via pixabay.com

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Last Updated on February 19, 2020

15 Positive Thinking Books You Need for a Happy Life

15 Positive Thinking Books You Need for a Happy Life

Books give us the opportunity to live vicariously through the lives of people with greater wisdom than ourselves. They stimulate our brains and help us not only solve the problems we struggle with, but also motivate and inspire us with new ideas.

One of the great things about people who think positively and live happy lives is that they love to help others do the same. There are countless positive-thinking books and these 15 are a great way to help you start living a happy life.

1. Man’s Search For Meaning by Victor E. Frankl

mans search for meaning

    This book goes through the horrific struggle of Viktor Frankl who survived holocaust concentration camps. The only thing that kept him going was his idea that everything, even the worst of human suffering, had to have meaning. If you’re struggling through anything in your life, I guarantee the words of Viktor will give you courage to press on and find happiness.

    2. Tuesdays with Morrie by Mitch Albom

    tuesday with morrie

       

      What is life’s greatest lesson? Morrie, a retired professor with a fatal disease, opts to use his predicament to share that message as opposed to just giving up and dying. Following the last few months of Morrie’s life will help you realize what is truly important in life.

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      3. The Last Lecture by Randy Pausch

      Lecture_Book

        Similar to Tuesdays with Morrie, Randy is a college professor who finds he has a fatal disease with only a few months to live. It is customary for professors at his university (Carnegie Mellon) to give a final lecture with the basis of ‘what wisdom would you impart to a large group of people if it was your last chance?’ Randy stays incredibly positive throughout and even keeps the lecture humorous and entertaining. Amidst it all, his wisdom is a powerful reminder about how to live a happy, full life.

        4. Earning Freedom by Michael Santos

        earning freedom

          Michael Santos was sentenced to 45 years is prison for selling drugs. During his term he fought hard to earn a masters degree and half of a doctorate (halted by the warden) while writing numerous books educating students about the criminal justice system. This book provides a fascinating window into his entire sentence (released in 2012) and how a positive attitude and strong work ethic got him through it. If he found happiness in prison through positive thinking, we can do it anywhere.

          If you don’t have the attention span to finish a long book, the following quick reads are shorter but just as powerful.

          5. The Little Engine That Could by Watty Piper

          little engine that could

            This book has shaped childrens’ minds for years. It illustrates the undeniable fact that when you think positively and believe in yourself, you can accomplish extraordinary things.

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            6. The Giving Tree by Shel Silverstein

            The_Giving_Tree

              Happiness is found in giving. What does it mean to love someone? What would you sacrifice for someone you love? This children’s book teaches a valuable lesson about unconditional love and what it truly means to be happy.

              7. The Dash by Linda Ellis and Mac Anderson

              the dash

                “When your life is over, everything you did will be represented by a single dash between two dates—what will that dash mean for the people you have known and loved?” (Linda Ellis) We don’t choose a lot of things about our life – parents, birthplace, etc. – but we can choose what that dash between those two dates means. This short book will give you a great perspective on making your life worthwhile.

                8. As a Man Thinketh by James Allen

                As-a-Man-Thinketh

                  “The outer conditions of a person’s life will always be found to be harmoniously related to his inner state… Men do not attract that which they want, but that which they are.” (James Allen) This book might be short, but it is jam-packed with statements that will make you stop and think. We truly become what we think we are. Negative thoughts affect us more than we know. Positive thinking = happy life.

                  9. A Million Miles in a Thousand Years by Donald  Miller

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                  a-million-miles-in-a-thousand-years

                    You are the author of your story. No matter how boring or dull your life has been, you can always turn it around. Donald was in a rut in his life. He had no desire to get out of bed and found himself questioning the meaning of life. Eventually he realized he wasn’t a slave to a pre-written script. He used that mindset to turn around his thoughts, actions, and life. When the closing credits roll on the story of your life, what will people say? Never forget that you have the power to push your limits and live an interesting, happy life.

                    10. The Traveler’s Gift by Andy Andrews

                    travelersgift

                      The Traveler’s Gift is a fictional story about a man who is overwhelmed with life and finds himself thrown into numerous true events from history – including Abraham Lincoln’s Gettysburg Address. He interacts and learns important life lessons from seven different experiences. The book is full of ways to think more positively and find more success in life.

                      11. David and Goliath by Malcolm Gladwell

                      david and goliath

                        Malcolm Gladwell motivates you to challenge your preconceptions of underdogs and misfits in this thought-provoking book. When you break down the facts in the story of David and Goliath from the Bible, you find that David really wasn’t an underdog at all – he was the one with the advantage. This book outlines story after story after story of people who were at a disadvantage and learned to find the strength in their weakness.

                        12. How Will You Measure Your Life by Clayton M. Christensen

                        how will you measure

                          How would you feel if you got to the end of your life only to realize you had been measuring success wrong? Clayton provides a mass amount of wisdom and advice on how to live a life you won’t regret.

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                          13. Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff by Richard Carlson

                          Dont_Sweat_Small_Stuff

                            The small things we worry about every day may not seem like a big deal, but they wear us down slowly and stop us from living up to our full potential. Learn how to get rid of those worries and negative thoughts and live a happier life.

                            14. Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis

                            mere christianity

                              C.S. Lewis, who used to be an Atheist, explains how he came to find meaning in life through Christianity. He breaks down all the reasons we doubt and falter in life and how living the principles of Christianity fixes our weaknesses. Lewis is famous for his deep, thought-provoking quotes and this book is no exception.

                              15. Bushido: The Way of the Samurai by Tsunetomo Yamamoto

                              bushido

                                Bushido is based on the Hagakure, a document that served as the basis for samurai warrior behavior. The document’s purpose was to shape the mind and the spirit of the samurai warrior.

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                                Featured photo credit: Annie Spratt via unsplash.com

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