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5 Ways To Overcome Disappointments

5 Ways To Overcome Disappointments

It seems very natural. We get hit by the wrong assumption and the disappointments lurk under the blanket. It’s a phase in which we are sad and displeased caused by false expectations.

It’s just the way of life. We get hit by it and we are in a bad mood until the unpleasant feeling subsides after a while. William Shakespeare said, “Expectation is the root of all heartache.

Whoever shares knowledge about disappointments can state it as “a feeling of false expectations.” That would be the shortest explanation.

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However, as every bad mood has a remedy, disappointment does too. I would like to jump to the five ways to overcome disappointments so I can help you pass the sad feeling.

1. Identify what made you disappointed

I know I am stating the obvious, but finding the rebel that made you feel sad and displeasured is the first step to the remedy. The rebel is false expectation, but if you already find yourself caught in the trap, you should see the reason for it. Your girlfriend or boyfriend cheating on you can be a vast disappointment. It can be cured only if you consider what sphere in your faithfulness needs to be lowered. Of course there is a way and that’s the end of your relationship, but consider the feeling gone once you “see” what made you feel that way.

2. Find pleasure in the disappointment

Finding pleasure in disappointment is about strengthening your character. Pleasure is about satisfaction, and your satisfaction should be that you passed one massive “character” test that made you stronger. Nobody can share knowledge of “what if” if they haven’t survived that feeling. Be grateful that you planted an iron helm onto your brain and you upgraded your level of greatness.

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Always remember, it is all about balance. Nobody can be happy and full of joy all the time. There has to be moments of sadness and displeasure to test your capability of overcoming the bad feelings.

3. Look on the bright side

If you have seen the movie Monty Python you know what I am talking about. It’s about seeing the possibility and bright side in every disappointment, even if you are hung on a cross.

It connects with number two. By finding pleasure in the disappointment we let the shine pass through. Every disappointment helps us become self-determined. By conquering the bad feelings, we have experience in steering the wheel during bad times.

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4. Boost your mood with motivation

It always works, believe me. If you go with the flow and watch sad movies like The Notebook and P.S I Love You or watch Tyson lose from Holyfield after you lost a boxing match, it will make you feel worse. I know it feels right to watch these sorts of movies but you need to force yourself against your will.

Watch a couple of happy ending love stories such as Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind or highlights from Mike Tyson’s knockouts. Not only will it transform your bad mood into positive, but it will motivate you to feel stupid that you felt so sad before. Motivational clips and adrenaline boosting songs always work for me. We are all different so you have to experiment on this one.

5. Lower your expectations

I left this one last because it’s most important. It’s like the cherry on the top of a pie. Expectations can lead to disappointments and that’s the only thing that made you feel sad. We induct so many feelings and false expectations in one particular thing that not only will it make you sad, but it can make you sick. Since all the bad thoughts result in dysfunction of the body, that can result in the break down of the immune system and viruses see the body as a playground.

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It is vital to expect less, because doing so can rarely lead you to sadness. Always remember that bad mood can be cured only by you. The five steps to remedy disappointments once more:

  • Identify what made you disappointed and realize why.
  • Find pleasure in the disappointment by strengthening your character and remember, it’s all about balance.
  • Always look on the bright side as Monty Python did.
  • Boost your mood with motivation (you have to experiment your remedies on this one).
  • Lower your expectations if you want to stay happy for a longer period of time.

Featured photo credit: Kristina Alexanderson via flickr.com

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Last Updated on January 18, 2019

7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

Some people will have a rain cloud hanging over them, no matter what the weather is outside. Their negative attitude is toxic to your own moods, and you probably feel like there is little you can do about it.

But that couldn’t be farther from the truth.

If you want to effectively deal with negative people and be a champion of positivity, then your best route is to take definite action through some of the steps below.

1. Limit the time you spend with them.

First, let’s get this out of the way. You can be more positive than a cartoon sponge, but even your enthusiasm has a chance of being afflicted by the constant negativity of a friend.

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In fact, negativity has been proven to damage your health physically, making you vulnerable to high levels of stress and even cardiac disease. There’s no reason to get hurt because of someone else’s bad mood.

Though this may be a little tricky depending on your situation, working to spend slightly less time around negative people will keep your own spirits from slipping as well.

2. Speak up for yourself.

Don’t just absorb the comments that you are being bombarded with, especially if they are about you. It’s wise to be quick to listen and slow to speak, but being too quiet can give the person the impression that you are accepting what’s being said.

3. Don’t pretend that their behavior is “OK.”

This is an easy trap to fall into. Point out to the person that their constant negativity isn’t a good thing. We don’t want to do this because it’s far easier to let someone sit in their woes, and we’d rather just stay out of it.

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But if you want the best for this person, avoid giving the false impression that their negativity is normal.

4. Don’t make their problems your problems.

Though I consider empathy a gift, it can be a dangerous thing. When we hear the complaints of a friend or family member, we typically start to take on their burdens with them.

This is a bad habit to get into, especially if this is a person who is almost exclusively negative. These types of people are prone to embellishing and altering a story in order to gain sympathy.

Why else would they be sharing this with you?

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5. Change the subject.

When you suspect that a conversation is starting to take a turn for the negative, be a champion of positivity by changing the subject. Of course, you have to do this without ignoring what the other person said.

Acknowledge their comment, but move the conversation forward before the euphoric pleasure gained from complaining takes hold of either of you.

6. Talk about solutions, not problems.

Sometimes, changing the subject isn’t an option if you want to deal with negative people, but that doesn’t mean you can’t still be positive.

I know that when someone begins dumping complaints on me, I have a hard time knowing exactly what to say. The key is to measure your responses as solution-based.

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You can do this by asking questions like, “Well, how could this be resolved?” or, “How do you think they feel about it?”

Use discernment to find an appropriate response that will help your friend manage their perspectives.

7. Leave them behind.

Sadly, there are times when we have to move on without these friends, especially if you have exhausted your best efforts toward building a positive relationship.

If this person is a family member, you can still have a functioning relationship with them, of course, but you may still have to limit the influence they have over your wellbeing.

That being said, what are some steps you’ve taken to deal with negative people? Let us know in the comments.

You may also want to read: How to Stop the Negative Spin of Thoughts, Emotions and Actions.

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