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5 life lessons you will learn the hard way

5 life lessons you will learn the hard way

Life is not easy when you are pursuing something worthwhile and ready to learn from the best experiences. Most of the time, we learn the lessons from the old and wise as they have already been where we are and have done what we do. But we hardly take their advice in advance. We never think of this as a precaution. We always learn it from our life and rarely does life teach us something in a easy way. It always takes tests and then fails us to learn anything worthwhile. Here are five life lessons which people will learn the hard way in majority of cases.

1. It takes consistent time and effort to be an expert in any area.

This is the first and foremost thing to keep in mind. People usually get discouraged when it takes more time than they thought it will. One thing to keep in mind is that people have to, at this time, refer only to people who have already achieved what you want to be, which most people fail to do. They look at other unsuccessful people and apply those criteria to them even before they take action. Look at any successful person and you’ll notice one thing common in all of them. They took time to learn and mastered their craft like no one else. There is no elevator to success; you have to take the stairs.

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2. You don’t have to live your life in a way society wants you to.

Decades of old beliefs, superstitions and rituals are being performed these days and are followed blindly without questioning their rationale. Parents sometimes force their children to select a career they don’t want because other children have selected that career. Girls are made to follow some rituals in their family which makes no sense to them at all. Worst of all, people follow them without even asking. There is no harm in old rituals and beliefs but when you pursue them before your interest, sooner or later you’ll realize that you should first do what you think is right.

3. We don’t care about the things we get easily.

This is true in all the areas of life. Take health for example. Very few people take their health seriously. They know that if their health is lost, they won’t be happy, still they eat junk food and never exercise, keep accumulating fat and keep spending on weight loss programs. Still nothing works. Why? Because they don’t take their health seriously and the real reason behind that is they have got it for free. We spend thousands on cars and take care of them nicely. Imagine what would have been the price of human body if we had to pay for it? And then imagine how well we would take care of it if we had paid a huge amount of money to get our body.

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4. In a world where everyone is trying to be like someone else, it takes great amount of courage to take the road less traveled.

In our whole life, we are always asking ten people before taking any step. We always want to validate that we are sure and do not make any mistake. We are too scared to fail hence, we follow the same path that everyone suggests, do the same thing everyone does, take the same career path everyone takes, wear the same clothes everyone wears, and hang out with the same people we work with. Why? Because we are scared. But when you get bored of life, you realize that you are not meant to do what everyone does and that your destiny is different than anyone else’s out there in the world. But the price we pay to realize this is high because it takes a tremendous amount of guts to follow your own trail by listening to your heart.

5. You have to break the rules sometimes.

We follow rules so that things are in order and no one is disturbed unnecessarily. This is true in case of traffic and other company rules but when it comes to your life, there are rules made by people who are scared to do something apart from their routine and therefore they made rules to prevent others doing so. But when time passes by and you think you are not being directed towards your goal and these so called rules are your biggest obstacles, BREAK THEM. Sometimes, we need to be bold and act courageously.

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After all, life lessons are always learned the hard way. However, if you are smart enough to learn early and wish not to waste your precious time learning them the hard way, learn them now and apply it to your life as soon as possible.  

Featured photo credit: skate via flickr.com

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Dhaval Gajera

Author and Speaker.

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Last Updated on November 15, 2018

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

What do you think it takes to achieve your goals? Hard work? Lots of actions? While these are paramount to becoming successful in reaching our goals, neither of these are possible without a positive mindset.

As humans, we naturally tend to lean towards a negative outlook when it comes to our hopes and dreams. We are prone to believing that we have limitations either from within ourselves or from external forces keeping us from truly getting to where we want to be in life. Our tendency to think that we’ll “believe it when we see it” suggests that our mindsets are focused on our goals not really being attainable until they’ve been achieved. The problem with this is that this common mindset fuels our limiting beliefs and shows a lack of faith in ourselves.

The Success Mindset

Success in achieving our goals comes down to a ‘success mindset’. Successful mindsets are those focused on victory, based on positive mental attitudes, empowering inclinations and good habits. Acquiring a success mindset is the sure-fire way to dramatically increase your chance to achieve your goals.

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The idea that achieving our goals comes down to our habits and actions is actually a typical type of mindset that misses a crucial point; that our mindset is, in fact, the determiner of our energy and what actions we take. A negative mindset will tend to create negative actions and similarly if we have a mindset that will only set into action once we see ‘proof’ that our goals are achievable, then the road will be much longer and arduous. This is why, instead of thinking “I’ll believe it when I see it”, a success mindset will think “I’ll see it when I believe it.”

The Placebo Effect and What It Shows Us About The Power of Mindset

The placebo effect is a perfect example of how mindset really can be powerful. In scientific trials, a group of participants were told they received medication that will heal an ailment but were actually given a sugar pill that does nothing (the placebo). Yet after the trial the participants believed it’s had a positive effect – sometimes even cured their ailment even though nothing has changed. This is the power of mindset.

How do we apply this to our goals? Well, when we set goals and dreams how often do we really believe they’ll come to fruition? Have absolute faith that they can be achieved? Have a complete unwavering expectation? Most of us don’t because we hold on to negative mindsets and limiting beliefs about ourselves that stop us from fully believing we are capable or that it’s at all possible. We tend to listen to the opinions of others despite them misaligning with our own or bow to societal pressures that make us believe we should think and act a certain way. There are many reasons why we possess these types of mindsets but a success mindset can be achieved.

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How To Create a Success Mindset

People with success mindsets have a particular way of perceiving things. They have positive outlooks and are able to put faith fully in their ability to succeed. With that in mind, here are a few ways that can turn a negative mindset into a successful one.

1. A Success Mindset Comes From a Growth Mindset

How does a mindset even manifest itself? It comes from the way you talk to yourself in the privacy of your own head. Realising this will go a long way towards noticing how you speak to yourself and others around you. If it’s mainly negative language you use when you talk about your goals and aspirations then this is an example of a fixed mindset.

A negative mindset brings with it a huge number of limiting beliefs. It creates a fixed mindset – one that can’t see beyond it’s own limitations. A growth mindset sees these limitations and looks beyond them – it finds ways to overcome obstacles and believes that this will result in success. When you think of your goal, a fixed mindset may think “what if I fail?” A growth mindset would look at the same goal and think “failures happen but that doesn’t mean I won’t be successful.”

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There’s a lot of power in changing your perspective.

2. Look For The Successes

It’s really important to get your mind focused on positive aspects of your goal. Finding inspiration through others can be really uplifting and keep you on track with developing your success mindset; reinforcing your belief that your dreams can be achieved. Find people that you can talk with about how they achieved their goals and seek out and surround yourself with positive people. This is crucial if you’re learning to develop a positive mindset.

3. Eliminate Negativity

You can come up against a lot of negativity sometimes either through other people or within yourself. Understanding that other people’s negative opinions are created through their own fears and limiting beliefs will go a long way in sustaining your success mindset. But for a lot of us, negative chatter can come from within and these usually manifest as negative words such as can’t, won’t, shouldn’t. Sometimes, when we think of how we’re going to achieve our goals, statements in our minds come out as negative absolutes: ‘It never works out for me’ or ‘I always fail.’

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When you notice these coming up you need to turn them around with ‘It always works out for me!’ and ‘I never fail!’ The trick is to believe it no matter what’s happened in the past. Remember that every new day is a clean slate and for you to adjust your mindset.

4. Create a Vision

Envisioning your end goal and seeing it in your mind is an important trait of a success mindset. Allowing ourselves to imagine our success creates a powerful excitement that shouldn’t be underestimated. When our brain becomes excited at the thought of achieving our goals, we become more committed, work harder towards achieving it and more likely to do whatever it takes to make it happen.

If this involves creating a vision board that you can look at to remind yourself every day then go for it. Small techniques like this go a long way in sustaining your success mindset and shouldn’t be dismissed.

An Inspirational Story…

For centuries experts said that running a mile in under 4 minutes was humanly impossible. On the 6th May 1954, Rodger Bannister did just that. As part of his training, Bannister relentlessly visualised the achievement, believing he could accomplish what everyone said wasn’t possible…and he did it.

What’s more amazing is that, as soon as Bannister achieved the 4-minute mile, more and more people also achieved it. How was this possible after so many years of no one achieving it? Because in people’s minds it was suddenly possible – once people knew that it was achievable it created a mindset of success and now, after over fifty years since Bannister did the ‘impossible’, his record has been lowered by 17 seconds – the power of the success mindset!

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