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4 Ways You Can Be Happy For Someone Experiencing Good Times When You’re Experiencing Hard Times

4 Ways You Can Be Happy For Someone Experiencing Good Times When You’re Experiencing Hard Times

You feel stuck. They get a promotion. You need a vacation. They book an all-inclusive. You get dumped. They get engaged. You long to be married, to have kids, to build your dream home, and they’re asking you to be their best man, to be Lexie’s Godparent, and to help them move.

Really? Could life pour any more salt on your open wounds?

We’ve all been there more times than we probably care to admit. We know that jealously that rears its ugly head. Try as you might, you just can’t seem to suppress it. You’re happy for them on the outside, but if you were brutally honest with yourself secretly deep down in your heart you’re not all that happy for them on the inside.

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You want to be. You have every intention of being sincere, and you muster every last drop of energy to say, “I’m so happy for you,” but let’s call a spade a spade.

The façade is cracked. The sadness of your current circumstances is seeping through your eyes. You’ve lost all inhibitions to stay strong.

So what does one do? Is it possible to have a genuinely smiling face and heart without wanting to launch mental grenades?

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Yes it is.

1. See the lessons you are learning.

There’s absolutely no limit to the amount of knowledge you can gain if you stay teachable. Life is the coolest university degree and it pours its limitless wealth of knowledge into those who study it. So go for it! Dissect your circumstances to see what your current challenges can teach you. Take notes! What can it hurt? You’re probably lying awake at night anyway, right?

2. Practice gratitude everyday.

Is that a aliché? Perhaps. But it’s a cliché for a reason.

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Focusing on what you do have as opposed to what you don’t is the most perspective-shifting thing you could ever do. It’s a discipline that should really be implemented when life is happy, so that when the hard times hit, the well-engrained habit will altar how you see your bad and cause you to ponder how bad your bad really is. I can think of no better celebratory bash than to host a farewell party for your own pity party.

3. Remind yourself of how far you’ve come.

You would never be where you are today without having gone through what you’ve gone through. It’s the power of your story. Those tough lessons taught you something valuable, and it’s important to go back from time to time to remind yourself of how far you’ve come.

Walk down the memory lane. Be proud of yourself. Revel in your hard work. Remind yourself of the lessons you have learned so far.

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Then allow those memories to serve as your reminder that your present challenges will one day be the future memories you will grow to understand and appreciate.

4. Remember that life recycles its seasons.

One day you’re laughing, the next day you’re crying, some days are easy, some days are hard, years come and years go. It’s the natural ebb and flow of life, there’s no denying that.

But beauty is found in owning the season you are in. Be present, be humble, learn, grow and take comfort in knowing that summer is always right around the corner from winter. For today, for the here and now, embrace not knowing. Embrace imperfection. Embrace uncertainty. Embrace growth. Embrace change.

And you know what’ll happen?

You’ll be too busy growing into a better version of yourself that you won’t even have to think about being happy for other people. You just will be. You’ll be so focused on appreciating your own journey, that you’ll naturally appreciate someone else’s. Your quiet confidence will be hard to deny.

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Last Updated on September 17, 2019

10 Simple Ways To Always Think Positive Thoughts

10 Simple Ways To Always Think Positive Thoughts

Positive thinking can lead to a lot of positive change in your life. Developing an optimistic outlook can be good for both your physical and mental health.

But sometimes, certain situations arise in life that makes it hard to keep a positive outlook. Take steps to make positive thinking become more like your second nature and you’ll reap the biggest benefits.

Here are 10 ways to make thinking positive thoughts easy:

1. Spend Time with Positive People

If you surround yourself with constant complainers, their negativity is likely to rub off on you.

Spend time with positive friends and family members to increase the likelihood that their positive thinking habits will become yours too. It’s hard to be negative when everyone around you is so positive.

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2. Take Responsibility for Your Behavior

When you encounter problems and difficulties in life, don’t play the role of the victim. Acknowledge your role in the situation and take responsibility for your behavior.

Accepting responsibility can help you learn from mistakes and prevent you from blaming others unfairly.

3. Contribute to the Community

One of the best ways to feel good about what you have, is to focus on what you have to give.

Volunteer in some manner and give back to the community. Helping others can give you a new outlook on the world and can assist you with positive thinking.

4. Read Positive and Inspirational Materials

Spend time each day reading something that encourages positive thinking. Read the Bible, spiritual material, or inspirational quotes to help you focus on what’s important to you in life. It can be a great way to start and end your day.

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Some recommendations for you:

5. Recognize and Replace Negative Thoughts

You won’t be successful at positive thinking if you’re still plagued by frequent negative thoughts. Learn to recognize and replace thoughts that are overly negative. Often, thoughts that include words like “always” and “never” signal that they aren’t true.

If you find yourself thinking something such as, “I always mess everything up,” replace it with something more realistic such as, “Sometimes I make mistakes but I learn from them.”

There’s no need to make your thoughts unrealistically positive, but instead, make them more realistic.

6. Establish and Work Toward Goals

It’s easier to be positive about problems and setbacks when you have goals that you’re working toward. Goals will give you motivation to overcome those obstacles when you encounter problems along the way. Without clear goals, it’s harder to make decisions and gauge your progress.

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Learn to set SMART goals to help you achieve more.

7. Consider the Consequences of Negativity

Spend some time thinking about the consequences of negative thinking. Often, it can become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

For example, a person who thinks, “I probably won’t get this job interview,” may put less effort into the interview. As a result, he may decrease his chances of getting the job.

Create a list of all the ways negative thinking impacts your life. It likely influences your behavior, your relationships, and your feelings. Then, create a list of the ways in which positive thinking could be beneficial.

8. Offer Compliments to Others

Look for reasons to compliment others. Be genuine in your praise and compliments, but offer it frequently. This will help you look for the good in other people.

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9. Create a Daily Gratitude List

If you start keeping a daily gratitude list, you’ll start noticing exactly how much you have to be thankful for. This can help you focus on the positive in your life instead of thinking about all the bad things that have happened in the day.

Getting in the habit of showing an attitude of gratitude makes positive thinking more of a habit. Here’re 40 Simple Ways To Practice Gratitude.

10. Practice Self-Care

Take good care of yourself and you’ll be more equipped to think positively.

Get plenty of rest and exercise and practice managing your stress well. Taking care of your physical and mental health will provide you with more energy to focus on positive thinking.

Learn about these 30 Self-Care Habits for a Strong and Healthy Mind, Body and Spirit.

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Featured photo credit: DESIGNECOLOGIST via unsplash.com

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