“Sister.She is your mirror, shining back at you with a world of possibilities. She is your witness, who sees you at your worst and best, and loves you anyway. She is your partner in crime, your midnight companion, someone who knows when you are smiling, even in the dark. She is your teacher, your defense attorney, your personal press agent, even your shrink. Some days, she’s the reason you wish you were an only child.
~ Barbara Alpert.Advertising
I am very privileged to have always had a very close relationship with my sister. I have a number of best friends, some have been my best friends for over 30 years and I love them dearly. My sister, however is “my best friend ever” .Isadora James describes exactly how I feel about our relationship, she quotes;
” A sister is a gift to the heart, a friend to the spirit, a golden thread to the meaning of life”
What makes the relationship so special and why my sister is my best friend ever is, because she is my connection to my past, my present and future. We have so many shared memories and she treasures every one of those memories as much as I do. When I look ahead to the future I see my sister by my side no matter what life path I choose and I am known to be susceptible to choosing many different paths!
So what makes my sister my best friend ever? Well, here are 30 things that my sister knows about me which explains exactly why she is my best friend ever. I am sure that if you have a close relationship with your sister she too will know pretty much the same 30 things about you which of course makes her “your best friend ever”.Advertising
Can I also just say that some of the 30 things my sister knows about me, nobody else does – so it is kind of scary declaring to the world and if you are reading this and you are my best friend, brother or husband remember I love you dearly! Please do not use this information against me.This list is not ranked in any order of priority, its just random.
- My sister knows my secrets from the past and right up to the present. She was 2 years old and I was eight when I first started telling her my secrets
- She knows my full potential, she knows exactly what I can achieve and has 100% belief in me
- She has a special nickname for me and when she calls me ##### (can’t quite tell that to the world just yet….maybe later)…that makes me feel special
- She knows how much I love her
- She knows that when she was born I loved her however I was also prepared to sell her
- My sister knows that when we go out for dinner I will want to share an entree and dessert with her and that I will pick food off her plate while she is eating and she is ok with that because she does the same. Everybody else gets really annoyed and we cant figure out what the problem is!
- She knows what embarrassing stories to tell about me and has told those stories at my 40th, my 50th birthday and wedding
- She knows what clothes I like and what looks good on me or what doesn’t. We often end up dressing in very similar outfits and then we have to flip a coin as to who has to go and change
- She knows why I am short and she is tall – I am short like my grandmother and she is tall like my mum (she loves telling that to everyone). My lack of statue also relates to the nick name she has for me.
- She is the one person in my life who I can be totally myself – no pretence
- My sister is my connection to my childhood memories and to the memory of our parents – we just need to look at each other and we go back to the time of our childhood and growing up on the farm.
- She knows not to look bored or get that glazed look when I reminisce about the good times in my past – which is often
- She has seen me very intoxicated and has never judged me or made me feel bad. She knows how bad I will feel the next morning. Once when I tripped (it was the carpet) and broke a number of wine glasses in a very expensive restaurant she calmly got me in a taxi took me home and has never mentioned the incident again!
- She knows what I think about the rest of the family – the good, bad and ugly
- She knows that she is the only one person that can moan to me about how annoying our family really are. No one else can do that, just her.
- She knows the right thing to say when I am feeling anxious, scared or fearful
- She always knows exactly what presents to give me and she always takes time to think about what the perfect gift is for me.
- My sister knows that I could ask her to do anything for me (even if it was illegal) and she would do it
- She notices and knows everything that is not so great about me, particularly the physical aspects happening for me at the time, and she will comment on them, such as having lots of pimples, looking too pale, losing too much weight, putting on too much weight etc.
- She knows she is the only one who can make a not very complimentary comment to me and won’t worry at all about what my response will be. She has already moved on.
- My sister knows that I hate all the yucky photos of me, however she somehow has managed to get them all and takes great delight in laughing and pointing out how ridiculous I looked
- My sister knows my pain and unbearable suffering at the sudden loss of our parents, because she too experienced the same pain and unbearable suffering – together we have managed to slowly recover.
- My sister knows that I trust her completely and that if my husband and I died, she would love and protect our children with her life.
- My sister knows (well she will now) that I admire and respect her immensely for her incredible determination, her intelligence, her focus and commitment to whatever task or project she sets for herself. She has amazing willpower which at times can be seen as being very stubborn – she just does not give up.
- Best friends will tread very carefully when they are giving feedback or offering an opinion to me, but not my sister, she knows exactly what needs to be said. She will point out all my faults and offer her opinions on how I should parent, save money, deal with my husband, lose weight etc. I also know that she loves me unconditionally no matter what I do, so I listen, breathe deeply and then smile.
- My sister knows that she has a memory like an elephant and when I tell stories from our childhood or family stories she will correct me if I get it wrong. She remembers everything and also knows what bits of the story I will leave out ( because it is not relevant to me) before I do and she will fill in the gaps! She is always right!
- My sister knows and shares the same values as me and that makes us very aligned in our thinking especially when we feel personally challenged by others.
- My sister knows that I can be unpredictable, fickle, fearful and at times painful and she is okay with it
- My sister knows how important my dream is to be a writer, speaker and coach and she is there 100%, supporting, coaching and encouraging me on my journey. To her, living my dream life is totally achievable and very realistic for me- its a no brainer from her perspective. She keeps telling me to “just get on with it”.
- My sister is my best friend ever because she knows what makes me happy and she always thinks about how she can support me to be the best person I can be and to live a happy fulfilled rewarding life.
Its a funny thing when I first started writing this article I thought wow 30 things is a lot to come up with in regard to what my sister knows about me. However now that I have completed the 30 things she knows about me, I actually have more….maybe I will leave them for another time.Advertising
“When sisters stand shoulder to shoulder, who stands a chance against us?” ~Pam Brown
Featured photo credit: two young women sitting on grass having good time via shutterstock.comAdvertising
Last Updated on September 17, 2018
7 Signs of an Unhappy Relationship That Makes You Feel Stuck
Relationships are complicated and when you’re unhappy, it can be difficult to tell what’s causing it and what needs to change.
Sometimes it’s as easy as opening up to your partner about your problems, while other times it may be necessary to switch partners or roll solo to get your mind straight.
When you’re in the thick of things, it can be difficult to tell if you’re unhappy in your relationship or just unhappy in general (in which case, a relationship may be just the cure you need).
Here’re signs of an unhappy relationship that is possibly making you feel stuck:
1. You’re depressed about your home life.
No matter what you do in life, you’re going to have good and bad days. Your relationship is no different.
However, no matter what you’re going through at home, you have to feel comfortable in your own home.
If you constantly dread going home because your significant other is there, there’s a problem. Maybe it’s something you already know about, everyone has an argument or just needs some alone time.
When that yearning to be alone becomes an insatiable obsession over the course of months and years, it’s time to realize you’re not the exception to the rule.
You’re unhappy in your relationship, and you need to take a look in the mirror and do whatever it takes to make yourself smile.
2. You aren’t comfortable being yourself.
Remember all those things you discovered about yourself when you first got together? The way your partner made you feel when you met that made you fall in love with him or her in the first place.
If they don’t make you feel that way anymore, it’s not the end of the world. If your partner makes you uncomfortable about being you, then her or she is only dragging you down. It’s up to you to decide how to handle that.
You need to be comfortable with who you are. This means being comfortable in your skin and with the way you walk, talk, look, breath, move, and all the other things that make you uniquely you.
If the person who supposedly loves you doesn’t make you feel good about yourself, know that you can do better. They’re not even one in a billion.
3. You can’t stop snooping.
Mutual trust is necessary in any relationship. The only way to get that trust is with respect.
I can find you anywhere online, no matter how private and secure you think you are. The odds of you having a password I can’t crack are slim. If we’ve met in person, I could install a remote key logger on your device without even touching it.
Finding your information online hardly takes a clandestine organization. Any idiot with a Wi-Fi-enabled device can cyberstalk you. I’m just the only idiot in the village admitting it.
So now that we know everyone snoops, it’s time to address your personal habits. Governments snoop because they don’t trust us. If you’re snooping on your partner, it’s because you don’t trust them.
It’s ok to have doubts, and it’s perfectly normal to look into anything that looks weird, but keep in mind that data collection is only half of an investigation.
If you find yourself constantly snooping and questioning everything, clearly there’s a trust issue and the relationship likely needs to end.
4. You’re afraid of commitment.
If you’ve been dating longer than a year and you aren’t engaged, it’s never going to happen.
Commitment is important. People will come up with a million ways to describe why they can’t be committed.
No matter who you are if you like it, you need to put a ring on it. Find an engagement ring, stick a gemstone in it and marry the person. If you’re not legally able to get married or you don’t believe in it for one reason or another, have a child (or adopt one, however you’re able to) or treat your partner’s family like your own. It’s a huge financial and mental commitment.
If you’re not ready for one or the other after some time, don’t waste anymore of your precious life on the relationship.
Your relationship should be something that propels you forward. If it’s not going anywhere, make it an open relationship and call it what it is—dating multiple people.
5. You imagine a happier life without your partner.
If all you’re doing is imagining a happier life without your partner, it’s a sign that you’re in the wrong relationship. You’re unhappy and you need to get out.
Your partner should be included in your dreams. There’s nothing wrong with wanting a future with someone.
Try to remember what you dreamed of before you got your heart broken by the realities of life, love and the pursuit of human success.
Remember when you would crush on that cute kid in class? You would secretly imagine marrying him or her and going on an adventure—that’s the way life should be.
If you’re not at least imagining adventures together, then why are you in that relationship?
6. You resent, rather than love your partner.
When a relationship starts to crumble, you begin to resent your partner for all the things you once loved about him or her.
When you’ve reached this point, your partner has reached at least No. 2 on this list. From your partner’s perspective, your unhappiness with them is picked up as bashing them for being who they are.
If you’re both unhappy in the relationship, it’s better if it ends as quickly and painlessly as possible.
7. You chase past feelings.
It’s okay to reminisce about the past, but if all you do is wish things were like they used to be, it’s a sign you’re not on the right path.
You’re unhappy and, at the very least, you need to have an open dialogue about it. This isn’t necessarily a sign that the relationship should end, but it definitely needs a spark.
When you talk to your partner candidly about what it is you’re looking for, you never know how they’ll react. The risk alone is worth it, good or bad.
If you’re feeling stuck in your current relationship, it’s time to reflect about it with your partner. Don’t ignore these signs of an unhappy relationship as they will slowly go worse and harm both you and your partner in long-term.
Featured photo credit: josh peterson via unsplash.com