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3 Reasons It Doesn’t Matter If You’re Doing It Right

3 Reasons It Doesn’t Matter If You’re Doing It Right

There are only two ways of doing things: The right way or the wrong way.

Or at least, that’s often what we choose to believe.

As humans, our fatal flaw is that we want perfection. We want to do things, and we want them done right. They need to be 100 percent on the ball, with no mistakes, typos or discrepancies.

The problem with perfection though – it can stop you dead in your tracks.

It can be that all-powerful tool for inaction. Preventing you from even getting the ball rolling, never mind actually finishing a project. But as a general rule of thumb – if you’re not doing anything; nothing is going to happen. Period.

So, I’m here to show you why doing things perfectly isn’t all that important.

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That the right way, isn’t always the best way. That something imperfect can take on a life of it’s own, and become great.

1. Rules Are Made To Be Broken

I don’t particularly care for rules. They tend to get in the way of good ideas, productivity and achieving what you really want.

Rules are made for compliance, and to prevent all out anarchy. They serve as nothing more than a guideline for what you should be doing, based on someone else’s previous success. 

The best thing I find to do with rules?

Break them.

Choose the ones you loathe, and shatter them. Abide by the ones you like and forge your own path. Once the rules you made stop working for you – break those ones as well.

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By breaking the rules, you change the entire game. Just like Hendrix playing his guitar upside down, Rosa Park’s wouldn’t get out of her seat and Elvis’ crazy hips were too hot for TV.

Once you make the rules work for you, the game becomes a whole lot easier to play.

2. No Plan Survives Contact With The Enemy

We are supposed to plan. That’s what’s expected of us, no matter what we aim to do. That’s how the old saying goes, right? ‘Fail to prepare, prepare to fail.’ In the modern world, I think we plan a little too much.

We need a gym plan, a business plan, a planned route to work, a marketing plan, a plan of how to plan plans.

And, planning has it’s merits. It’s always worthwhile knowing what we’re going to do, and why’re going to do it. But in a lot of cases, the act of making a plan can stop us dead in our tracks. We don’t want to finish our plan until it is planning perfection.

The harsh truth of it all though – things rarely go to plan.

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In fact, if 25 percent of your plan actually happens, I’d be amazed. As soon as you set your plan in motion, the winds of change blow and realities you couldn’t ever have accounted for take over.

You could get the flu, upset a client, lose a contract, break your leg, have targeted the wrong audience, have a faulty beta model or have your building overrun by termites. Anything you couldn’t foresee coming in your plan could potentially happen.

Your success will not be measured on how well you planned your approach, but in how well you adapted to the obstacles in the way.

Don’t use planning as an excuse for in action. When it’s good enough, it’s time to put it in to action.

3. Mistakes Are Valuable

Imagine your life if you did everything right. If you made no mistakes, never tripped up over yourself and never, once in your life, just screwed it all up.

You’d never learn anything, ever.

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The important lessons in life, love and success come from making beautifully overwhelming mistakes. In taking that step in the wrong direction, that shows you it’s not the path to take. The mistakes that give you that gut intuition to do one thing, or another.

If I’d never have crashed my car at 17, I’d probably be dead now. I’d have been driving round, 20 mph over the limit with my music blaring, and ended up in a fatal accident. Instead, I’m here to write this article for you today.

Mistakes feel terrible at first. And nobody every really likes making a mistake. But the truth of the matter is – without them, you’ll never go any further forward in life. For every good decision, there is a powerful mistake hidden behind it.

When have you broken the rules, stopped planning to perfection or made a valuable mistake? I’d love to hear your comments.

Featured photo credit: old skool paul via flickr.com

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Last Updated on October 14, 2020

Had a Bad Day? 7 Ways to Rebound From It and Feel Good Again

Had a Bad Day? 7 Ways to Rebound From It and Feel Good Again

Today didn’t turn out as you planned, but it doesn’t mean you’re weak. It simply means that you’re human, and you’re not bad just because you had a bad day.

“Not everyday is a good day but there is something good in every day.” -Alice Morse Earle

It’s not the end of the world when you find yourself thinking “I had a bad day,” but it can feel like it. You may have had plans that fell apart, experiences that set you back, and interactions that only did harm.

You may have started the day thinking you could take on it all, only to find you could hardly get out of bed. When you have a bad day, you can forget to look at the good.

Sometimes, self-care helps us to remember why we are worth it. It helps us to recharge and reset our mindset. It helps us to know that there are still options and that the day isn’t over yet.

Love yourself today, no matter how hard it’s been. That’s the way to find yourself amidst the hardships you have. That’s how you center yourself and regain focus and live a more meaningful life. Give yourself some credit and compassion.

Here are 7 ways to rebound from a bad day using self-compassion as a tool. If you had a bad day, these are for you!

1. Make a Gratitude List

In a study on gratitude, psychologists Dr. Robert A Emmons and Dr. Michael E. McCullough conducted an experiment where one group of people wrote out gratitude lists for ten weeks while another group wrote about irritations. The study found that the group that wrote about gratitude reported more optimistic mindsets in their lives[1].

Overall, having a gratitude list improved well-being and made one truly grateful by counting the blessings in their lives.

Write a list of what you are grateful for if you had a bad day. Make it as long as you like, but also remember to note why you’re grateful for each thing you write.

What has given you the most joy? What has set you up for better days? Keep a tally of triumphs in mind, especially when you do have the bad days.

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The day doesn’t define you, and you still have things of value that surround you. These could be material things, spiritual connections and experiences, relationships, basic needs, emotional and mental well-being, physical health, progress towards hopes and dreams, or simply being alive.

Here are some other simple ways to practice gratitude.

2. Write in a Journal

Journaling affects your overall mental health, which also affects physical health and aids in the management of stress, depression, anxiety, and more[2].

All you need is a pen and paper, or you could do an online, password-protected journal such as Penzu. The key is to get started and not pressure yourself on how polished or perfect it is. You don’t need to have prior experience to start journal writing. Just start.

Write out everything that is bothering you for 15 minutes. This helps with rumination, processing problems, and can even aid with brainstorming solutions.

However you approach it, you can find patterns of thinking that no longer serve you and start to transform your overall mental state. This will impact all areas of your life and is a great coping skill.

3. Meditate

Meditation can help you overcome negative thought patterns, worrying about the future, dwelling on the past, or struggling to overcome a bad day[3]. It shifts your mentality and helps you focus on the present or any one thing you truly want to focus on.

Here is an example of a meditation you can do:

Get into a comfortable position. Close your eyes. Rest your body, release tension, and unclench your jaw. Tighten and release each muscle group in a body scan for progressive muscle relaxation.

Focus on your breath, taking a few deep breaths. Let your belly expand when you breathe in for diaphragmatic breathing. Empty yourself completely of air, then return to normal breathing.

Next, focus on the idea of self-love and let it erase negative thoughts. Think about the ways you’ve been judging yourself, with the narratives coming up that your mind may create.

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Give yourself unconditional love and release judgment. Take your time meditating on this because you matter. This is particularly important if you had a bad day.

Check out this article for more on how to get started with a meditation practice.

4. Do Child’s Pose

Yoga Outlet says:

“Child’s Pose is a simple way to calm your mind, slow your breath, and restore a feeling of peace and safety. Practicing the pose before bedtime can help to release the worries of the day. Practicing in the morning can you help transition from sleeping to waking.”[4]

When you do Child’s Pose, it can be between difficult positions in yoga, or it can be anytime you feel you need a rest. It helps you recover from difficulties and relax the mind.

It also has the physical health benefits of elongating your back, opening your hips, and helping with digestion[5].

To do Child’s Pose, rest your buttocks back on your feet, knees on the floor. Elongate your body over your knees with both arms extended or tucked back, with head and neck resting on the floor[6].

Had a bad day? Try Child's Pose.

     

    Do this pose as a gift to yourself. You are allowing yourself to heal, rest, get time for yourself, recover, and recharge. When you’ve had a bad day, it’s there waiting for you.

    5. Try Positive Self-Talk

    Engage in positive self-talk. This is essentially choosing your thoughts.

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    When you have a negative thought, such as “I can’t do this,” replace it consciously with the thought “I can do this.” Give yourself positive affirmations to help with this.

    Negative self-talk fits into four general categories: personalizing or blaming yourself, magnifying or only focusing on the negative, catastrophizing or expecting the worst to happen, and polarizing or only seeing back and white[7].

    When you stop blaming yourself for everything and start focusing on the positive, expecting things to work out, and seeing the areas of grey in life, you reverse these negative mindsets and engage in positive self-talk.

    When you speak words of kindness to yourself, your brain responds with a more positive attitude. That attitude will affect everything you do. It’s how you take care of yourself if you had a bad day.

    Check in with yourself to know when you are having negative self-talk. Are you seeing patterns? When did they start to become a problem? Are you able to turn these thoughts around?

    6. Use Coping Skills and Take a Break

    Use your coping skills. This means not letting your thoughts take control of yourself.

    You can distract yourself and escape a bit. Do things you love. You can exercise, listen to music, dance, volunteer or help someone, be in nature, or read a book.

    It isn’t about repression. It’s about redirection. You can’t stay in thoughts that are no longer working for you.

    Sometimes, it’s okay to get out of your own way. Give yourself a break from the things going on in your head. You can always come back to a problem later. This may even help you figure out the best course of action as sometimes stepping away is the only way to see the solution.

    If you had a bad day, you may not feel like addressing what went wrong. You may need a break, so take one.

    7. If a Bad Day Turns Into Bad Days

    “I believe depression is legitimate. But I also believe that if you don’t exercise, eat nutritious food, get sunlight, get enough sleep, consume positive material, surround yourself with support, then you aren’t giving yourself a fighting chance.” –Jim Carrey

    If you’ve been feeling out of control, depressed, or unstable for more than a few weeks, it’s time to call a mental health professional. This is not because you have failed in any way. It’s because you are human, and you simply need help.

    You may not be able to quickly rebound from a bad day, and that’s fine. Feel what you feel, but don’t let it consume you.

    When you talk to a professional, share the techniques that you have already tried here and whether they were helpful. They may tell you additional ideas or gain insights from your struggles of not being able to rebound from a series of bad days.

    If you’re having more than just a bad day, they will want to know. If you don’t have the answers, that’s okay, too. You just need to try these tools and figure out how you’re feeling. That’s all that’s required of you.

    Keep taking care of yourself. Any progress is progress, no matter how small. Give yourself a chance to get better by reaching out.

    Final Thoughts

    If you had a bad day, don’t let it stop you.

    Know this: It’s okay not to be okay. You have a right to feel what you feel. But there is something you can do about it.

    You can invest in yourself via self-care.

    You are not alone in this. Everyone has bad days from time to time. You just need to know that you are the positive things you tell yourself.

    More Things You Can Do If You Had a Bad Day

    Featured photo credit: Anthony Tran via unsplash.com

    Reference

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