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20 Amazing Things About Having An Older Brother

20 Amazing Things About Having An Older Brother

Older Brothers are like sweet but sour candy that you can’t get enough of. Even though they sometimes make your eyes twitch and your lips pucker, you can’t seem to resist them.

They tease you and may drive your crazy, but they will also protect you and love you. So we’ve come up with the 20 things to remind girls about the amazing benefits of having an older brother.

1. He taught you how to understand boys and men alike.

Men or boys can be hard to deal with and for a girl, having an elder brother can provide great insight to understanding them. From the time a young lady starts dating, an elder brother can help her navigate through and past a lot of the early misunderstandings she may experience at the start of the relationships.

Having an elder brother and his advice at hand can help you avoid a lot of relationship heartaches. Or, at least, get through them.

2. He taught you how to be patient.

As a sister, you are probably all too familiar with the pranks and goofy games boys play. On a positive note, this taught you how to be patient. Whether its motherhood and parenting or dealing with others, having an elder brother has taught you to not get angry or be frustrated too easily.

3. He showed you how to be tough.

Girls who have older brothers tend to make good fighters, literally and figuratively. You learn to stand up for yourself and make your voice heard. You learn to not get pushed around by anyone.

The wrestling matches you get into with your brother teach you to stay strong and never give up. He might be stronger than you, but you learn to become cunning.

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4. He introduced you to sports.

For most young girls, an older brother begins your lifelong obsession with sports or your favorite sports teams. If you are an avid sports enthusiast, chances are, you have a lot of fond memories enjoying watching ball games with your older brother.

5. He taught you how to compete.

Having an older brother is great because he teaches you how to tap into your competitive side. As you try to succeed in any career path, this skill will become an asset.

An older brother gives you great insight into the male dominant world of competition. He will also help develop your self-esteem and leadership skills.

6. He taught you to keep your emotions in check.

It is no secret that girls are typically more emotional than boys. However, girls who grow up with brothers learn to keep their emotions in check.

They learn to “suck it up” and move on. Growing up among boys means you will most likely learn to play the role of comforter in tricky or tragic situations.

7. He taught you chivalry.

Older brothers teach their little sisters exactly how they should be treated by a man. As a little sister, you notice the way he treats your mom or his girlfriend and that in turn creates the standard that you will hold all men who try to date you to.

The way you let men treat you today is probably what you learned from your older brother.

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8. He will always protect you.

Sometimes a girl just needs to be protected by her older brother. Like a lion to its cubs, men take on a very protective nature or role when it comes to the well-being of their little sisters.

You don’t have to worry about any creepy men coming around with your older brother in the picture.

9. He looks to you to keep him accountable.

As a little sister, one thing you may not realize is that you help keep your older brother in check and accountable for his actions. Because he knows you are looking up to him, he will probably not do all the dumb things boys are typically knows to do. Just some.

10. You get to be his personal stylist.

You are probably responsible for any kind of style and class your older brother may have. It is no secret that most men don’t know how to dress themselves, so little sisters often take on the role of personal stylist to their older brothers.

11. You teach him compassion.

It is impossible for an older brother to stay mad and upset at his little sister for too long. In this sense, you teach him early on compassion and how to forgive.

No matter what you do, your older brother will always have room in his heart for you.

12. You will never need to hire a mover.

You know all too well that life can get very busy. You move to college, move into a new apartment or need help hauling heavy equipment. No matter what it is, having an older brother means you will never need to hire someone to help you move your stuff.

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He is always going to be there to literally help you move the heavy stuff in your life.

13. You will always have a steady stream of good men to date.

Eventually most girls would love to get married. However it can be difficult sometimes to find good men to date. Having an older brother means you will have a steady stream of suitors.

Some may be his friends and others may be guys who try to get to know him as a way to get to know you. Whatever the case, when it comes to dating, having an older brother can be a very productive resource.

14. You got to teach him about girls.

Men typically don’t know much about girls. However your brother has the upper hand to learning just how to treat or talk to a woman.

Whenever he is having girl problems, you know he will always reach out to you for advice. Like he has been there for you to learn about the opposite sex, you have been his source of learning too. And an older brother learns to confide in his little sister.

15. He teaches you self-defense.

In this day and age, it has become increasingly important for girls to know how to use a weapon to protect themselves. More than likely, if you know how to operate a weapon like a gun or a knife, you learned it from your older brother.

16. He takes the brunt of parenting.

Having an older sibling mean someone already absorbed the bad parenting skills of mom and dad. By the time you come around, their skills are more refined and relaxed.

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For younger sisters, having an older brother may mean that your parents won’t be so hard on you.

17. He teaches you what’s cool.

From a young age, a girl might turn to her older brother who seems to have more knowledge and expertise about the world. They often, for example, teach you about pop culture and world events.

Having an older brother can be a gateway to learning so much about the world.

18. He’s there to help you financially.

Older brothers love to take on a father figure type role when it comes to their younger sisters. This often means helping them out financially.

For example, since he is older and probably already working, chances are you can ask him for money whenever mom or dad says no.

19. He teaches you to laugh at yourself and be silly.

Life is serious enough, but having an older brother can teach you to enjoy the humor of practical jokes. A lot of times, boys will play pranks.And sometimes you get to be included on those with your brother.
Learning to roll with the punches will teach you to not take life so seriously and be able to laugh at yourself.

20. He is a shoulder to cry on.

Part of the protective nature of an older brother is being a good listener or a comfortable shoulder to cry on. Knowing that you can always count on him to listen without criticism or judgement is the glue that binds little sisters to their older brothers.

Much like the love of a father, an older brother tends to love his little sister unconditionally.

Featured photo credit: http://mandanielsen.blogspot.com/2010_03_01_archive.html via mandanielsen.blogspot.com

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Last Updated on September 18, 2020

13 Helping Points When Things Don’t Go Your Way

13 Helping Points When Things Don’t Go Your Way

For the original article by Celestine: 13 Helping Points When Things Don’t Go Your Way

“We all have problems. The way we solve them is what makes us different.” ~Unknown

“It’s not stress that kills us, it is our reaction to it.” – Hans Selye

Have you ever experienced moments when things just don’t go your way? For example, losing your keys, accidentally spilling your drink, waking up late, missing your buses/trains, forgetting to bring your things, and so on?

You’re not alone. All of us, myself included, experience times when things don’t go as we expect.

Here is my guide on how to deal with daily setbacks.

1. Take a step back and evaluate

When something bad happens, take a step back and evaluate the situation. Some questions to ask yourself:

  1. What is the problem?
  2. Are you the only person facing this problem in the world today?
  3. How does this problem look like at an individual level? A national level? On a global scale?
  4. What’s the worst possible thing that can happen to you as a result of this?
  5. How is it going to impact your life in the next 1 year? 5 years? 10 years?

Doing this exercise is not to undermine the problem or disclaiming responsibility, but to consider different perspectives, so you can adopt the best approach for it. Most problems we encounter daily may seem like huge issues when they crop up, but most, if not all, don’t have much impact in our life beyond that day.

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2. Vent if you have to, but don’t linger on the problem

If you feel very frustrated and need to let off some steam, go ahead and do that. Talk to a friend, complain, crib about it, or scream at the top of your lungs if it makes you happy.

At the same time, don’t get caught up with venting. While venting may temporarily relieve yourself, it’s not going to solve the problem ultimately. You don’t want to be an energy vampire.

Vent if there’s a need to, but do it for 15 to 20 minutes. Then move on.

3. Realize there are others out there facing this too

Even though the situation may be frustrating, you’re not alone. Remember there are almost 7 billion people in the world today, and chances are that other people have faced the same thing before too. Knowing it’s not just you helps you to get out of a self-victimizing mindset.

4. Process your thoughts/emotions

Process your thoughts/emotions with any of the four methods:

  1. Journal. Write your unhappiness in a private diary or in your blog. It doesn’t have to be formal at all – it can be a brain dump on rough paper or new word document. Delete after you are done.
  2. Audio taping. Record yourself as you talk out what’s on your mind. Tools include tape recorder, your PC (Audacity is a freeware for recording/editing audio) and your mobile (most mobiles today have audio recording functions). You can even use your voice mail for this. Just talking helps you to gain awareness of your emotions. After recording, play back and listen to what you said. You might find it quite revealing.
  3. Meditation. At its simplest form, meditation is just sitting/lying still and observing your reality as it is – including your thoughts and emotions. Some think that it involves some complex mambo-jumbo, but it doesn’t.
  4. Talking to someone. Talking about it with someone helps you work through the issue. It also gets you an alternate viewpoint and consider it from a different angle.

5. Acknowledge your thoughts

Don’t resist your thoughts, but acknowledge them. This includes both positive and negative thoughts.

By acknowledging, I mean recognizing these thoughts exist. So if say, you have a thought that says, “Wow, I’m so stupid!”, acknowledge that. If you have a thought that says, “I can’t believe this is happening to me again”, acknowledge that as well.

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Know that acknowledging the thoughts doesn’t mean you agree with them. It’s simply recognizing the existence of said thoughts so that you can stop resisting yourself and focus on the situation on hand.

6. Give yourself a break

If you’re very stressed out by the situation, and the problem is not time sensitive, then give yourself a break. Take a walk, listen to some music, watch a movie, or get some sleep. When you’re done, you should feel a lot more revitalized to deal with the situation.

7. Uncover what you’re really upset about

A lot of times, the anger we feel isn’t about the world. You may start off feeling angry at someone or something, but at the depth of it, it’s anger toward yourself.

Uncover the root of your anger. I have written a five part anger management series on how to permanently overcome anger.

After that, ask yourself: How can you improve the situation? Go to Step #9, where you define your actionable steps. Our anger comes from not having control on the situation. Sitting there and feeling infuriated is not going to change the situation. The more action we take, the more we will regain control over the situation, the better we will feel.

8. See this as an obstacle to be overcome

As Helen Keller once said,

“Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experiences of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired and success achieved.”

Whatever you’re facing right now, see it as an obstacle to be overcome. In every worthy endeavor, there’ll always be countless obstacles that emerge along the way. These obstacles are what separate the people who make it, and those who don’t. If you’re able to push through and overcome them, you’ll emerge a stronger person than before. It’ll be harder for anything to get you down in the future.

9. Analyze the situation – Focus on actionable steps

In every setback, there are going to be things that can’t be reversed since they have already occurred. You want to focus on things that can still be changed (salvageable) vs. things that have already happened and can’t be changed. The only time the situation changes is when you take steps to improve it. Rather than cry over spilt milk, work through your situation:

  1. What’s the situation?
  2. What’s stressing you about this situation?
  3. What are the next steps that’ll help you resolve them?
  4. Take action on your next steps!

After you have identified your next steps, act on them. The key here is to focus on the actionable steps, not the inactionable steps. It’s about regaining control over the situation through direct action.

10. Identify how it occurred (so it won’t occur again next time)

A lot of times we react to our problems. The problem occurs, and we try to make the best out of what has happened within the context. While developing a healthy coping mechanism is important (which is what the other helping points are on), it’s also equally important, if not more, to understand how the problem arose. This way, you can work on preventing it from taking place next time, vs. dealing reactively with it.

Most of us probably think the problem is outside of our control, but reality is most of the times it’s fully preventable. It’s just a matter of how much responsibility you take over the problem.

For example, for someone who can’t get a cab for work in the morning, he/she may see the problem as a lack of cabs in the country, or bad luck. However, if you trace to the root of the problem, it’s probably more to do with (a) Having unrealistic expectations of the length of time to get a cab. He/she should budget more time for waiting for a cab next time. (b) Oversleeping, because he/she was too tired from working late the previous day. He/she should allocate enough time for rest next time. He/she should also pick up better time management skills, so as to finish work in lesser time.

11. Realize the situation can be a lot worse

No matter how bad the situation is, it can always be much worse. A plus point vs. negative point analysis will help you realize that.

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12. Do your best, but don’t kill yourself over it

No matter how bad your situation may seem, do your best, but don’t kill yourself over it. Life is too beautiful to worry so much over daily issues. Take a step back (#1), give yourself a break if you need to (#6), and do what you can within your means (#9). Everything else will unfold accordingly. Worrying too much about the outcome isn’t going to change things or make your life any better.

13. Pick out the learning points from the encounter

There’s something to learn from every encounter. What have you learned from this situation? What lessons have you taken away?

After you identify your learning points, think about how you’re going to apply them moving forward. With this, you’ve clearly gained something from this encounter. You’ve walked away a stronger, wiser, better person, with more life lessons to draw from in the future.

Get the manifesto version of this article: [Manifesto] What To Do When Things Don’t Go Your Way

Featured photo credit: Alice Donovan Rouse via unsplash.com

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