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20 Amazing Things About Having An Older Brother

20 Amazing Things About Having An Older Brother

Older Brothers are like sweet but sour candy that you can’t get enough of. Even though they sometimes make your eyes twitch and your lips pucker, you can’t seem to resist them.

They tease you and may drive your crazy, but they will also protect you and love you. So we’ve come up with the 20 things to remind girls about the amazing benefits of having an older brother.

1. He taught you how to understand boys and men alike.

Men or boys can be hard to deal with and for a girl, having an elder brother can provide great insight to understanding them. From the time a young lady starts dating, an elder brother can help her navigate through and past a lot of the early misunderstandings she may experience at the start of the relationships.

Having an elder brother and his advice at hand can help you avoid a lot of relationship heartaches. Or, at least, get through them.

2. He taught you how to be patient.

As a sister, you are probably all too familiar with the pranks and goofy games boys play. On a positive note, this taught you how to be patient. Whether its motherhood and parenting or dealing with others, having an elder brother has taught you to not get angry or be frustrated too easily.

3. He showed you how to be tough.

Girls who have older brothers tend to make good fighters, literally and figuratively. You learn to stand up for yourself and make your voice heard. You learn to not get pushed around by anyone.

The wrestling matches you get into with your brother teach you to stay strong and never give up. He might be stronger than you, but you learn to become cunning.

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4. He introduced you to sports.

For most young girls, an older brother begins your lifelong obsession with sports or your favorite sports teams. If you are an avid sports enthusiast, chances are, you have a lot of fond memories enjoying watching ball games with your older brother.

5. He taught you how to compete.

Having an older brother is great because he teaches you how to tap into your competitive side. As you try to succeed in any career path, this skill will become an asset.

An older brother gives you great insight into the male dominant world of competition. He will also help develop your self-esteem and leadership skills.

6. He taught you to keep your emotions in check.

It is no secret that girls are typically more emotional than boys. However, girls who grow up with brothers learn to keep their emotions in check.

They learn to “suck it up” and move on. Growing up among boys means you will most likely learn to play the role of comforter in tricky or tragic situations.

7. He taught you chivalry.

Older brothers teach their little sisters exactly how they should be treated by a man. As a little sister, you notice the way he treats your mom or his girlfriend and that in turn creates the standard that you will hold all men who try to date you to.

The way you let men treat you today is probably what you learned from your older brother.

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8. He will always protect you.

Sometimes a girl just needs to be protected by her older brother. Like a lion to its cubs, men take on a very protective nature or role when it comes to the well-being of their little sisters.

You don’t have to worry about any creepy men coming around with your older brother in the picture.

9. He looks to you to keep him accountable.

As a little sister, one thing you may not realize is that you help keep your older brother in check and accountable for his actions. Because he knows you are looking up to him, he will probably not do all the dumb things boys are typically knows to do. Just some.

10. You get to be his personal stylist.

You are probably responsible for any kind of style and class your older brother may have. It is no secret that most men don’t know how to dress themselves, so little sisters often take on the role of personal stylist to their older brothers.

11. You teach him compassion.

It is impossible for an older brother to stay mad and upset at his little sister for too long. In this sense, you teach him early on compassion and how to forgive.

No matter what you do, your older brother will always have room in his heart for you.

12. You will never need to hire a mover.

You know all too well that life can get very busy. You move to college, move into a new apartment or need help hauling heavy equipment. No matter what it is, having an older brother means you will never need to hire someone to help you move your stuff.

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He is always going to be there to literally help you move the heavy stuff in your life.

13. You will always have a steady stream of good men to date.

Eventually most girls would love to get married. However it can be difficult sometimes to find good men to date. Having an older brother means you will have a steady stream of suitors.

Some may be his friends and others may be guys who try to get to know him as a way to get to know you. Whatever the case, when it comes to dating, having an older brother can be a very productive resource.

14. You got to teach him about girls.

Men typically don’t know much about girls. However your brother has the upper hand to learning just how to treat or talk to a woman.

Whenever he is having girl problems, you know he will always reach out to you for advice. Like he has been there for you to learn about the opposite sex, you have been his source of learning too. And an older brother learns to confide in his little sister.

15. He teaches you self-defense.

In this day and age, it has become increasingly important for girls to know how to use a weapon to protect themselves. More than likely, if you know how to operate a weapon like a gun or a knife, you learned it from your older brother.

16. He takes the brunt of parenting.

Having an older sibling mean someone already absorbed the bad parenting skills of mom and dad. By the time you come around, their skills are more refined and relaxed.

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For younger sisters, having an older brother may mean that your parents won’t be so hard on you.

17. He teaches you what’s cool.

From a young age, a girl might turn to her older brother who seems to have more knowledge and expertise about the world. They often, for example, teach you about pop culture and world events.

Having an older brother can be a gateway to learning so much about the world.

18. He’s there to help you financially.

Older brothers love to take on a father figure type role when it comes to their younger sisters. This often means helping them out financially.

For example, since he is older and probably already working, chances are you can ask him for money whenever mom or dad says no.

19. He teaches you to laugh at yourself and be silly.

Life is serious enough, but having an older brother can teach you to enjoy the humor of practical jokes. A lot of times, boys will play pranks.And sometimes you get to be included on those with your brother.
Learning to roll with the punches will teach you to not take life so seriously and be able to laugh at yourself.

20. He is a shoulder to cry on.

Part of the protective nature of an older brother is being a good listener or a comfortable shoulder to cry on. Knowing that you can always count on him to listen without criticism or judgement is the glue that binds little sisters to their older brothers.

Much like the love of a father, an older brother tends to love his little sister unconditionally.

Featured photo credit: http://mandanielsen.blogspot.com/2010_03_01_archive.html via mandanielsen.blogspot.com

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Last Updated on August 19, 2019

How to Be True to Yourself and Live the Life You Want

How to Be True to Yourself and Live the Life You Want

We live in a world that constantly tells us what to do, how to act, what to be. Knowing how to be true to yourself and live the life you want can be a challenge.

When someone asks how we are, we assume that the person does not mean the question sincerely, for it would lead to an in depth conversation. So telling them that you are good or fine, even if you’re not, is the usual answer.

In an ideal world, we would stop and truly listen. We wouldn’t be afraid to be ourselves. Instead, when we answer about how we are doing, our mask, the persona we show the world, tightens. Sometimes even more so than it might have been before. Eventually, it becomes hard to take off, even when you’re alone.

Imagine a world where we asked how someone was doing and they really told us. Imagine a world where there were no masks, only transparency when we talked to one another.

If you want to live in a world that celebrates who you are, mistakes and all, take off the mask. It doesn’t mean you have to be positive or fine all the time.

According to a Danish psychologist, Svend Brinkman, we expect each other to be happy and fine every second, and we expect it of ourselves. And that “has a dark side.”[1] Positive psychology can have its perks but not at the expense at hiding how you truly feel in order to remain seemingly positive to others.

No one can feel positive all the time and yet, that is what our culture teaches us to embrace. We have to unlearn this. That said, telling others you are ‘“fine”’ all the time is actually detrimental to your wellbeing, because it stops you from being assertive, from being authentic or your truest self.

When you acknowledge a feeling, it leads you to the problem that’s causing that feeling; and once you identify the problem, you can find a solution to it. When you hide that feeling, you stuff it way down so no one can help you.You can’t even help yourself.

Feelings are there for one reason: to be felt. That doesn’t mean you have to act on that feeling. It just means that you start the process of problem solving so you can live the life you want.

1. Embrace Your Vulnerability

When you are your true self, you can better self-advocate or stand up for what you need. Your self-expression matters, and you should value your voice. It’s okay to need things, it’s okay to speak up, and it’s okay not to be okay.

Telling someone you are simply “fine” when you are not, does your story and your journey a great disservice. Being true to yourself entails embracing all aspects of your existence.

When you bring your whole self to the table, there is nothing that you can’t beat. Here’re 7 benefits of being vulnerable you should learn.

Can you take off the mask? This is the toughest thing anyone can do. We have learned to wait until we are safe before we start to be authentic.

In relationships especially, this can be hard. Some people avoid vulnerability at any cost. And in our relationship with ourselves, we can look in the mirror and immediately put on the mask.

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It all starts with your story. You have been on your own unique journey. That journey has led you here, to the person you are today. You have to be unafraid, and embrace all aspects of that journey.

You should seek to thrive, not just survive. That means you do not have to compete or compare yourself with anyone.

Authenticity means you are enough. It’s enough to be who you are to get what you want.

What if for the first time ever, you were real? What if you said what you wanted to say, did what you wanted to do, and didn’t apologize for it?

You were assertive, forthcoming in your opinions or actions to stand for what is right for you, (rather than being passive or aggressive) in doing so. You didn’t let things get to you. You knew you had something special to offer.

That’s where we all should be.

So, answer me this:

How are you, really?

And know that no matter the answer, you should still be accepted.

Bravery is in the understanding that you still may not be accepted for your truth.

Bravery is knowing you matter even when others say that you do not.

Bravery is believing in yourself when all evidence counters doing so (i.e. past failures or losses)

Bravery is in being vulnerable while knowing vulnerability is a sign of strength.

It’s taking control.

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2. Choose Your Attitude in Adversity

You can take control of your destiny and live the life you want by being true to yourself. You can start anytime. You can start today.

You can start with one day at a time, just facing what happens that day. Most of us get overwhelmed when faced with the prospect of a big change. Even if the only thing we change is our attitude.

In one instant, you can become a different person with a change of attitude. When you take control of your attitude, you become able to better understand what is around you. This allows you to move forward.

Originally, you may have had a life plan. It could have started when you were little; you were hoping to become a mermaid, doctor, astronaut or all three when you grew up. You were hoping to be someone. You were hoping to be remembered.

You can still dream those dreams, but eventually reality sets in. Obstacles and struggles arise. You set on a different path when the last one didn’t work out. You think of all the “shoulds” in your life in living the life you want. You should be doing this…should be doing that…

Clayton Barbeau, psychologist, coined the term “shoulding yourself.’[2] When we are set on one path and find ourselves doing something different. It becomes all the things you should be doing rather than seeing the opportunities right in front of you.

But in all this disarray, did you lose sight of the real you?

It may be in our perceived failures and blunders that we lose sight of who we are, because we try to maintain position and status.

In being who we really are and achieving what we really want, we need to be resilient: How to Build Resilience to Face What Life Throws at You

It means that we do not see all possibilities of what might happen, but must trust ourselves to begin again, and continue to build the life we want. In the face of adversity, you must choose your attitude.

Can attitude overcome adversity? It certainly helps. While seeking to be true to yourself and live the life you want, you will have to face a fact:

Change will happen.

Whether that change is good or bad is unique to each person and their perspective.

You might have to start over, once, twice, a few times. It doesn’t mean that everything will be okay, but that you will be okay. What remains or should remain is the true you. When you’ve lost sight of that, you’ve lost sight of everything.

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And then, you rebuild. Moment after moment, day after day. We all have a choice, and in this moment, that matters.

You can choose to have a positive attitude, seeing the silver lining in each situation and, where there is none, the potential for one. Maybe that silver lining is you and what you will do with the situation. How will you use it for something good?

That’s how you can tap into yourself and your power. Sometimes it happens by accident, sometimes on purpose. It can happen when we aren’t even looking for it, or it can be your only focus. Everyone gets there differently.

You can rise, or you can remain. Your choice.

When the worst happens, you can rely on your authenticity to pull you through. That’s because Self Advocacy, speaking up to let others know what you need, is part of finding the real you.

There is nothing wrong with asking for help. Or sometimes, helping others can help us deal with the pain of a hurtful situation. You decide how you’re going to help others, and suddenly, you become your best self.

3. Do What Makes You Happy When No One’s Looking

Being the best version of you has nothing to do with your success or your status. It has everything to do with your Character, what you do when no one’s looking.

In order to create the life you want, you have to be the person you want to be. Faking it till you make it is just a way to white knuckle it through your journey. You have the fire inside of you to make things right, to put the pieces together, to live authentically. And Character is how you get there.

If you fall down and you help another up while you’re down there, it’s like you rise twice.

Along with attitude, your character is about the choices you make rather than what happens to you.

Yes, it’s about doing the right thing even when obstacles seem insurmountable.  It’s about using that mountain you’ve been given to show others it can be moved.  It’s about being unapologetically you, taking control, choosing your attitude in adversity and being the best version of you to create the life you want.

How do you know what you really want? Is it truly status or success?

Unfortunately, these things do not always bring happiness. And aspects of our image or “performance driven existence” may not achieve satisfaction. Materialism is part of our refusal to accept ourselves as enough. All the things we use to repress our true selves are about being enough.

“Enoughness” is what we truly seek, but ego gets in the way.

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Ego is the perception of self as outer worth. It’s not REAL self worth.

Ego represses our true self with a new self— the self of chasing ‘“Am I ever enough?”’ questions. And instead of filling our true selves with self-love and acceptance, when we “should ourselves” and chase “enoughness,” we feed the ego or our image.

It’s important to realize YOU ARE ENOUGH, without all the material trappings.

Stanford psychologist Meagan O’Reilly describes the damage of not thinking we are enough. One of her tactics for combating this is to complete the sentence,[3]

“If I believed I were already enough, I’d ____”

What would you do if you felt you were enough?

By believing you are enough, you can live the life you want.

So many fake it to try to get there, and they end up losing themselves when they lose more and more touch with their Authenticity.

Final Thoughts

By being yourself, you are being brave. By acknowledging all you can be, you tell the universe that you can until you believe it too. The steps are easy, and you are worth it. All of it is about the purpose you are leading and the passion that is your fuel.

Being true to yourself is all about mastering how to live life authentically rather than faking or forcing it. Having the life you want (and deserve) is about being trusting in yourself and the purpose you are living for. Both need passion behind it, fueling it each second, or you will experience burn out.

When you are authentic, you can call the road you walk your own. When you live your life for you and not just the results of all your actions (faking it till you make it), you can let go of what you don’t need. This clarifies and pushes purpose to you, living for something that is greater than you.

You will find that making decisions based on what will actually achieve your goals, will help you attain the life you want, and your success with each step, will allow you to enjoy the process. Good luck!

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Featured photo credit: Ariana Prestes via unsplash.com

Reference

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