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20 Amazing Things About Having An Older Brother

20 Amazing Things About Having An Older Brother

Older Brothers are like sweet but sour candy that you can’t get enough of. Even though they sometimes make your eyes twitch and your lips pucker, you can’t seem to resist them.

They tease you and may drive your crazy, but they will also protect you and love you. So we’ve come up with the 20 things to remind girls about the amazing benefits of having an older brother.

1. He taught you how to understand boys and men alike.

Men or boys can be hard to deal with and for a girl, having an elder brother can provide great insight to understanding them. From the time a young lady starts dating, an elder brother can help her navigate through and past a lot of the early misunderstandings she may experience at the start of the relationships.

Having an elder brother and his advice at hand can help you avoid a lot of relationship heartaches. Or, at least, get through them.

2. He taught you how to be patient.

As a sister, you are probably all too familiar with the pranks and goofy games boys play. On a positive note, this taught you how to be patient. Whether its motherhood and parenting or dealing with others, having an elder brother has taught you to not get angry or be frustrated too easily.

3. He showed you how to be tough.

Girls who have older brothers tend to make good fighters, literally and figuratively. You learn to stand up for yourself and make your voice heard. You learn to not get pushed around by anyone.

The wrestling matches you get into with your brother teach you to stay strong and never give up. He might be stronger than you, but you learn to become cunning.

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4. He introduced you to sports.

For most young girls, an older brother begins your lifelong obsession with sports or your favorite sports teams. If you are an avid sports enthusiast, chances are, you have a lot of fond memories enjoying watching ball games with your older brother.

5. He taught you how to compete.

Having an older brother is great because he teaches you how to tap into your competitive side. As you try to succeed in any career path, this skill will become an asset.

An older brother gives you great insight into the male dominant world of competition. He will also help develop your self-esteem and leadership skills.

6. He taught you to keep your emotions in check.

It is no secret that girls are typically more emotional than boys. However, girls who grow up with brothers learn to keep their emotions in check.

They learn to “suck it up” and move on. Growing up among boys means you will most likely learn to play the role of comforter in tricky or tragic situations.

7. He taught you chivalry.

Older brothers teach their little sisters exactly how they should be treated by a man. As a little sister, you notice the way he treats your mom or his girlfriend and that in turn creates the standard that you will hold all men who try to date you to.

The way you let men treat you today is probably what you learned from your older brother.

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8. He will always protect you.

Sometimes a girl just needs to be protected by her older brother. Like a lion to its cubs, men take on a very protective nature or role when it comes to the well-being of their little sisters.

You don’t have to worry about any creepy men coming around with your older brother in the picture.

9. He looks to you to keep him accountable.

As a little sister, one thing you may not realize is that you help keep your older brother in check and accountable for his actions. Because he knows you are looking up to him, he will probably not do all the dumb things boys are typically knows to do. Just some.

10. You get to be his personal stylist.

You are probably responsible for any kind of style and class your older brother may have. It is no secret that most men don’t know how to dress themselves, so little sisters often take on the role of personal stylist to their older brothers.

11. You teach him compassion.

It is impossible for an older brother to stay mad and upset at his little sister for too long. In this sense, you teach him early on compassion and how to forgive.

No matter what you do, your older brother will always have room in his heart for you.

12. You will never need to hire a mover.

You know all too well that life can get very busy. You move to college, move into a new apartment or need help hauling heavy equipment. No matter what it is, having an older brother means you will never need to hire someone to help you move your stuff.

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He is always going to be there to literally help you move the heavy stuff in your life.

13. You will always have a steady stream of good men to date.

Eventually most girls would love to get married. However it can be difficult sometimes to find good men to date. Having an older brother means you will have a steady stream of suitors.

Some may be his friends and others may be guys who try to get to know him as a way to get to know you. Whatever the case, when it comes to dating, having an older brother can be a very productive resource.

14. You got to teach him about girls.

Men typically don’t know much about girls. However your brother has the upper hand to learning just how to treat or talk to a woman.

Whenever he is having girl problems, you know he will always reach out to you for advice. Like he has been there for you to learn about the opposite sex, you have been his source of learning too. And an older brother learns to confide in his little sister.

15. He teaches you self-defense.

In this day and age, it has become increasingly important for girls to know how to use a weapon to protect themselves. More than likely, if you know how to operate a weapon like a gun or a knife, you learned it from your older brother.

16. He takes the brunt of parenting.

Having an older sibling mean someone already absorbed the bad parenting skills of mom and dad. By the time you come around, their skills are more refined and relaxed.

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For younger sisters, having an older brother may mean that your parents won’t be so hard on you.

17. He teaches you what’s cool.

From a young age, a girl might turn to her older brother who seems to have more knowledge and expertise about the world. They often, for example, teach you about pop culture and world events.

Having an older brother can be a gateway to learning so much about the world.

18. He’s there to help you financially.

Older brothers love to take on a father figure type role when it comes to their younger sisters. This often means helping them out financially.

For example, since he is older and probably already working, chances are you can ask him for money whenever mom or dad says no.

19. He teaches you to laugh at yourself and be silly.

Life is serious enough, but having an older brother can teach you to enjoy the humor of practical jokes. A lot of times, boys will play pranks.And sometimes you get to be included on those with your brother.
Learning to roll with the punches will teach you to not take life so seriously and be able to laugh at yourself.

20. He is a shoulder to cry on.

Part of the protective nature of an older brother is being a good listener or a comfortable shoulder to cry on. Knowing that you can always count on him to listen without criticism or judgement is the glue that binds little sisters to their older brothers.

Much like the love of a father, an older brother tends to love his little sister unconditionally.

Featured photo credit: http://mandanielsen.blogspot.com/2010_03_01_archive.html via mandanielsen.blogspot.com

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Published on May 4, 2021

How To Spot Fake People (And Ways To Deal With Them)

How To Spot Fake People (And Ways To Deal With Them)

They say we are the average of the five persons we spend the most time with. For a minute, consider the people around you. Are they truly who your “tribe” should be or who you aspire to become in the future? Are they really genuine people who want to see you succeed? Or are they fake people who don’t really want to see you happy?

In this article, I’ll review why it is important to surround yourself with genuine individuals—the ones who care, bring something to our table, and first and foremost, who leave all fakeness behind.

How to Spot Fake People?

When you’ve been working in the helping professions for a while, spotting fake people gets a bit easier. There are some very clear signs that the person you are looking at is hiding something, acting somehow, or simply wanting to get somewhere. Most often, there is a secondary gain—perhaps attention, sympathy, or even a promotion.

Whatever it is, you’re better off working their true agenda and staying the hell away. Here are some things you should look out for to help spot fake people.

1. Full of Themselves

Fake people like to show off. They love looking at themselves in the mirror. They collect photos and videos of every single achievement they had and every part of their body and claim to be the “best at what they do.”

Most of these people are actually not that good in real life. But they act like they are and ensure that they appear better than the next person. The issue for you is that you may find yourself always feeling “beneath” them and irritated at their constant need to be in the spotlight.

2. Murky in Expressing Their Emotions

Have you ever tried having a deep and meaningful conversation with a fake person? It’s almost impossible. It’s because they have limited emotional intelligence and don’t know how they truly feel deep down—and partly because they don’t want to have their true emotions exposed, no matter how normal these might be.

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It’s much harder to say “I’m the best at what I do” while simultaneously sharing “average” emotions with “equal” people.

3. Zero Self-Reflection

To grow, we must accept feedback from others. We must be open to our strengths and to our weaknesses. We must accept that we all come in different shapes and can always improve.

Self-reflection requires us to think, forgive, admit fault, and learn from our mistakes. But to do that, we have to be able to adopt a level of genuineness and depth that fake people don’t routinely have. A fake person generally never apologizes, but when they do, it is often followed with a “but” in the next breath.

4. Unrealistic Perceptions

Fake people most often have an unrealistic perception of the world—things that they want to portray to others (pseudo achievements, materialistic gains, or a made-up sense of happiness) or simply how they genuinely regard life outside themselves.

A lot of fake people hide pain, shame, and other underlying reasons in their behavior. This could explain why they can’t be authentic and/or have difficulties seeing their environment for the way it objectively is (both good and bad).

5. Love Attention

As I mentioned earlier, the biggest sign that something isn’t quite right with someone’s behavior can be established by how much they love attention. Are you being interrupted every time you speak by someone who wants to make sure that the spotlight gets reverted back to them? Is the focus always on them, no matter the topic? If yes, you’re probably dealing with a fake person.

6. People Pleaser

Appreciation feels nice but having everyone like you is even better. While it is completely unrealistic for most people to please everyone all the time, fake people seem to always say yes in pursuit of constant approval.

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Now, this is a problem for two reasons. Firstly, these people are simply saying yes to things for their own satisfaction. Secondly, they often end up changing their minds or retracting their offer for one reason or another (“I would have loved to, but my grandmother suddenly fell ill.”), leaving you in the lurch for the 100th time this year.

7. Sarcasm and Cynicism

Behind the chronic pasted smile, fake people are well known for brewing resentment, jealousy, or anger. This is because, behind the postcard life, they are often unhappy. Sarcasm and cynicism are well known to act as a defense mechanism, sometimes even a diversion—anything so they can remain feeling on top of the world, whether it is through boosting themselves or bringing people down.

8. Crappy friend

Fake people are bad friends. They don’t listen to you, your feelings, and whatever news you might have to share. In fact, you might find yourself migrating away from them when you have exciting or bad news to share, knowing that it will always end up one way—their way. In addition, you might find that they’re not available when you truly need them or worse, cancel plans at the last minute.

It’s not unusual to hear that a fake person talks constantly behind people’s backs. Let’s be honest, if they do it to others, they’re doing it to you too. If your “friend” makes you feel bad constantly, trust me, they’re not achieving their purpose, and they’re simply not a good person to have around.

The sooner you learn to spot these fake people, the sooner you can meet meaningful individuals again.

How to Cope With Fake People Moving Forward?

It is important to remind yourself that you deserve more than what you’re getting. You are worthy, valuable, precious, and just as important as the next person.

There are many ways to manage fake people. Here are some tips on how to deal with them.

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1. Boundaries

Keep your boundaries very clear. As explained in the book Unlock Your Resilience, boundaries are what keep you sane when the world tries to suffocate you. When fake people become emotional vampires, make sure to keep your distances, limit contact, and simply replace them with more valuable interactions.

2. Don’t Take Their Behavior Personally

Sadly, they most likely have behaved this way before they knew you and will continue much longer after you have moved on. It isn’t about you. It is about their inner need to meet a void that you are not responsible for. And in all honesty, unless you are a trained professional, you are unlikely to improve it anyway.

3. Be Upfront and Honest About How You Feel

If your “friend” has been hurtful or engaged in behaviors you struggle with, let them know—nicely, firmly, however you want, but let them know that they are affecting you. If it works, great. If it doesn’t, you’ll feel better and when you’re ready to move on, you’ll know you tried to reach out. Your conscience is clear.

4. Ask for Advice

If you’re unsure about what you’re seeing or feeling, ask for advice. Perhaps a relative, a good friend, or a colleague might have some input as to whether you are overreacting or seeing some genuine concerns.

Now, don’t confuse asking for advice with gossiping behind the fake person’s back because, in the end, you don’t want to stoop down to their level. However, a little reminder as to how to stay on your own wellness track can never hurt.

5. Dig Deeper

Now, this one, I offer with caution. If you are emotionally strong, up to it, guaranteed you won’t get sucked into it, and have the skills to manage, perhaps you could dig into the reasons a fake person is acting the way they do.

Have they suffered recent trauma? Have they been rejected all their lives? Is their self-esteem so low that they must resort to making themselves feel good in any way they can? Sometimes, having an understanding of a person’s behavior can help in processing it.

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6. Practice Self-Care!

Clearly, putting some distance between the fake person and yourself is probably the way to go. However, sometimes, it takes time to get there. In the meantime, make sure to practice self-care, be gentle with yourself, and compensate with lots of positives!

Self-care can be as simple as taking a hot shower after talking to them or declining an invitation when you’re not feeling up to the challenge.

Spotting fake people isn’t too hard. They generally glow with wanna-be vibes. However, most often, there are reasons as to why they are like this. Calling their behavior might be the first step. Providing them with support might be the second. But if these don’t work, it’s time to stay away and surround yourself with the positivity that you deserve.

Final Thoughts

Remember that life is a rollercoaster. It has good moments, tough moments, and moments you wouldn’t change for the world. So, look around and make sure that you take the time to choose the right people to share it all with.

We are the average of the five people we spend the most time with, so take a good look around and choose wisely!

More Tips on Dealing With Fake People

Featured photo credit: Priscilla Du Preez via unsplash.com

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