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17 Things Only Slow People Would Understand

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17 Things Only Slow People Would Understand

Have you been called a “slowpoke”, a “sloth”, or just plain “slow?”  Have you ever been told to “speed up”, “hurry up”, “think fast”, or “spit it out”?  If you have, this article is for you!  You’re slow, you’re good at being slow, and you’re probably better off for it! This may be a fast-paced world, but you know that the quick way isn’t always the best way.  Here are 15 great reasons why you may be “slow.”

You Make Sure Everything is Correct

I learned within 10 minutes at my first job at Burger King that I would never make a good drive-thru “pusher.”  I was just too slow!  I knew how upset people got when their order was incorrect, and I think I spent 3 precious minutes bobbing my head up and down between the food in the carry-out bag and the overhead order screen.  Management quickly sent me back to front cashier.  Slow people can be very methodical.

You Want Everything to Be Perfect

Slow people can also be perfectionists.  This means it may take a long time to get the results, but they will be fantastic when you finally get them!  The last person to finish tests is often the person who is carefully checking answers.  I was one of those students who spent hours on my homework each night but also got straight A’s throughout my school career.

You’re Waiting for the Right Timing

If you’re slow, methodical, AND a perfectionist, you are also likely to be a procrastinator.  You know you’re not a slacker — you have very good intentions — you’re just afraid that your project may take a very long time.  In fact, this very article is past the due date!  The best thing for you slow, perfectionistic, procrastinators like me is to make sure you break those projects into manageable chunks and then schedule them in throughout the week, reworking your timing as needed.  If you can manage your time, you can put that perfectionism to great use!

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You Are in “the Zone”

Do people complain that you are slow at correspondence?  This may be because you find responding to e-mails, phonecalls, and texts very disruptive!  I often find that I get into a flow throughout the day, and responding to a “very important” phonecall or e-mail can throw a wrench in my productivity machine.  I feel much more at ease when I can sit down and respond to all my e-mails at once.

You Give Your Full Attention

I also much prefer completing one project at a time, which I’ve discovered is actually better for you!  Studies show that in order to multitask you actually need to split your brain activity, which means less focus and less efficiency! Remember that on your next job interview!  Finally, I’m uncomfortable answering the phone if I know my mind won’t be fully present.  This may make us the wrong choice as an emergency contact, but it makes us the right person for a heart-to-heart conversation.  When we talk with others, they know that we have time for them, and we’re not checking our e-mail while we’re doing it.

You Choose Your Words Carefully

Unfortunately, those who can spit out rapid-fire responses get noticed, while those with well-developed answers get the shaft!  Introverts in particular take quite a long time to process information.  They run their thoughts through a complex system of tests and tweaks before they are satisfied enough to share their response.  So, often others think they have nothing to say!  If you are one of those big analyzers, be sure to say, “Let me think on that a minute,” so that others know that you are still forming your response.  Also, remember to find a healthy balance.  Rapid-firers may regret speaking before thinking, but deep thinkers can fall into the trap of over-thinking.

You Think More Deeply

Not only do you spend quite a bit of time analyzing, you may go pretty deep with your thinking, too.  You prefer profound thoughts to small talk, and there is so much knowledge and learning to consider!  Deep thinkers may not be the life of the party, but if you ask the right questions — you might open Pandora’s box!

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You’re a Good Listener

Or maybe you’re not deep in thought. Maybe you’re actually listening!  Many people aren’t good listeners because they’re not giving their full attention to the person who is speaking; they’re too busy formulating what they will say next. Good listeners still their minds and do not form a response until the other person is finished.  These are the people that you really want to talk with because you know they’ll hear everything you have to say.

You Consider All of Your Options

Some may call you indecisive . . .  but how about open-minded?  I’m sometimes the last person to place my order because I won’t settle for “the usual.”  I’m brave enough to try something new but conscientious enough to thoroughly read the menu and try to make my best choice.

You’re An Artist

When it was time to go out, and I was running behind I used to joke to my partner that I was having a “girl moment.”  Truthfully, I was getting my inner artist on!  I would experiment with make-up, adding a little of this and taking away a little of that, looking at my face from every angle in the mirror.  And I would sometimes change my whole outfit 5 or 6 times because I just couldn’t find the top to match the bottom. And then it was accessories, accessories, accessories!  That’s also why we spend so much time trying on clothes?  We know what looks good, and we’re not stopping ’til we find it!

You Enjoy Your Food

Are you considered a “slow-eater”?  Good for you!  This is much better for your health.  As a classroom teacher, by the time I made it to lunch after wrapping up for the morning, I usually had 10-15 minutes to shovel down food.  During a visit to my chiropractor I asked about my issues with bloating, and I was amazed by the simplicity of his response: “Chew your food more slowly.”  Sure enough, my condition improved immediately after I changed my eating style!  Besides allowing your stomach to more properly digest your food, you slow-eaters are more likely to enjoy your food.  You’ll have more time to taste it, to smell it.  Slow-eating is encouraged to help prevent over-eating, as well.  If I’m craving a cookie, and I’ve crammed it down my throat, my body has missed the satisfying taste and smell, and I’m more likely to grab another one.  Slowing down your eating also gives your stomach a chance to catch up with your eyes!  Those who eat more slowly are more likely to recognize when their stomach is full and to stop eating when they are satisfied.

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You Want to Fully Get Something

How much do you remember of those tests you crammed for?  How much did you really get from that article you skimmed?  I enjoy a book much more when I take my time reading it.  I get a lot more out of a movie when I rewind parts that I missed.  The more you slow down, the more you understand.

You Care

Which gifts do you appreciate the most and remember the longest — the ones that took two seconds to buy or the ones that took careful thought and much effort? Some people will go on a hunt until they find that perfect gift.  Others make them, infusing their precious time and love into their gifts.  This past Christmas my dad’s gift to me was a beautiful miniature stained glass window of lighthouses (my favorite image) that he had created himself.  You can be sure that will stay in my window for the rest of my life.

You’re in the Moment

Do people complain that you walk too slowly, run too slowly, ride too slowly, or drive too slowly?  Besides being a safer person, you are also more likely to be relaxed and in the moment!  Think about those “Sunday drivers” that drive you crazy — or maybe you’ve been one of them!  Why do they drive so slowly?  They are relaxed.  They are not rushing to work or to an appointment.  They are spending the day with family and friends, in a state of peace, doing the things they love.  Isn’t that a great place to be?

You Enjoy the View

When you take a brisk walk through the park, do you remember the flowers that you passed?  Do you catch the birds that fly overhead?  I’ve found that I can’t remember much of what I did on the days that I rushed from place to place, and I don’t see any of the trail when I’m biking for speed.  My mom is notorious for lagging behind on nature walks because she stops every few feet to take pictures!  She says that taking pictures has opened up a whole new world for her.  She sees things that she never would have noticed before.

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You Want to Be Safe

There’s nothing wrong with slowing down and leaving yourself enough time to get where you want to go.  I’d prefer to be safe and read a book for a bit if I arrive somewhere early.  If people are honking behind you or passing you left and right — so what?  I’ll bet you have a great driving record and are less likely to be found in a ditch on those bad weather days!

You’re Worth the Wait

So what that you’re the last one ready, the last one to speak, or the last one done?  You’re worth it!  You take your time, you do it right, and it turns out well.  You’re a happier, more relaxed person, a genuine listener, a dependable employee, and you look amazing!

So, the next time someone tells that you are slow, take it as a compliment!  Know that by slowing things down you are enjoying the view and keeping your life from speeding on by.

Featured photo credit: Just Colorful Bubble by Victor Hanacek via picjumbo.com

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Last Updated on November 18, 2021

10 Proven Ways to Judge a Person’s Character

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10 Proven Ways to Judge a Person’s Character

We all fall into the trap of judging a person’s character by their appearance. How wrong we are! All too often, the real character of the person only appears when some negative event hits them or you. Then you may see a toxic person emerging from the ruins and it is often a shock.

A truly frightening example is revealed in the book by O’Toole in Bowman called Dangerous Instincts: How Gut Instincts Betray Us. A perfectly respectable, charming, well dressed neighbor was found to have installed a torture chamber in his garage where he was systematically abusing kidnapped women. This is an extreme example, but it does show how we can be totally deceived by a person’s physical appearance, manners and behavior.

So, what can you do? You want to be able to assess personal qualities when you come into contact with colleagues, fresh acquaintances and new friends who might even become lifelong partners. You want to know if they are:

  • honest
  • reliable
  • competent
  • kind and compassionate
  • capable of taking the blame
  • able to persevere
  • modest and humble
  • pacific and can control anger.

The secret is to reserve judgment and take your time. Observe them in certain situations; look at how they react. Listen to them talking, joking, laughing, explaining, complaining, blaming, praising, ranting, and preaching. Only then will you be able to judge their character. This is not foolproof, but if you follow the 10 ways below, you have a pretty good chance of not ending up in an abusive relationship.

1. Is anger a frequent occurrence?

All too often, angry reactions which may seem to be excessive are a sign that there are underlying issues. Do not think that every person who just snaps and throws his/her weight around mentally and physically is just reacting normally. Everyone has an occasional angry outburst when driving or when things go pear-shaped.

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But if this is almost a daily occurrence, then you need to discover why and maybe avoid that person. Too often, anger will escalate to violent and aggressive behavior. You do not want to be near someone who thinks violence can solve personal or global problems.

2. Can you witness acts of kindness?

How often do you see this person being kind and considerate? Do they give money to beggars, donate to charity, do voluntary work or in some simple way show that they are willing to share the planet with about 7 billion other people?

I was shocked when a guest of mine never showed any kindness to the weak and disadvantaged people in our town. She was ostensibly a religious person, but I began to doubt the sincerity of her beliefs.

“The best index to a person’s character is how he treats people who can’t do him any good, and how he treats people who can’t fight back.”

Abigail Van Buren

3. How does this person take the blame?

Maybe you know that s/he is responsible for a screw-up in the office or even in not turning up on time for a date. Look at their reaction. If they start blaming other colleagues or the traffic, well, this is an indication that they are not willing to take responsibility for their mistakes.

4. Don’t use Facebook as an indicator.

You will be relieved to know that graphology (the study of that forgotten skill of handwriting) is no longer considered a reliable test of a person’s character. Neither is Facebook stalking, fortunately. A study showed that Facebook use of foul language, sexual innuendo and gossip were not reliable indicators of a candidate’s character or future performance in the workplace.

5. Read their emails.

Now a much better idea is to read the person’s emails. Studies show that the use of the following can indicate certain personality traits:

  • Too many exclamation points may reveal a sunny disposition
  • Frequent errors may indicate apathy
  • Use of smileys is the only way a person can smile at you
  • Use of the third person may reveal a certain formality
  • Too many question marks can show anger
  • Overuse of capital letters is regarded as shouting. They are a definite no-no in netiquette, yet a surprising number of  people still use them.

6. Watch out for the show offs.

Listen to people as they talk. How often do they mention their achievements, promotions, awards and successes? If this happens a lot, it is a sure indication that this person has an over-inflated view of his/her achievements. They are unlikely to be modest or show humility. What a pity!  Another person to avoid.

7. Look for evidence of perseverance.

A powerful indicator of grit and tenacity is when a person persists and never gives up when they really want to achieve a life goal. Look for evidence of them keeping going in spite of enormous difficulties.

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Great achievements by scientists and inventors all bear the hallmark of perseverance. We only have to think of Einstein, Edison (who failed thousands of times) and Nelson Mandela to get inspiration. The US Department of Education is in no doubt about how grit, tenacity and perseverance will be key success factors for youth in the 21st century.

8. Their empathy score is high.

Listen to how they talk about the less fortunate members of our society such as the poor, immigrants and the disabled. Do you notice that they talk in a compassionate way about these people? The fact that they even mention them is a strong indicator of empathy.

People with zero empathy will never talk about the disadvantaged. They will rarely ask you a question about a difficult time or relationship. They will usually steer the conversation back to themselves. These people have zero empathy and in extreme cases, they are psychopaths who never show any feelings towards their victims.

9. Learn how to be socially interactive.

We are social animals and this is what makes us so uniquely human. If a person is isolated or a loner, this may be a negative indicator of their character. You want to meet a person who knows about trust, honesty and loyalty. The only way to practice these great qualities is to actually interact socially. The great advantage is that you can share problems and celebrate success and joy together.

“One can acquire everything in solitude, except character.”

Stendhal

 10. Avoid toxic people.

These people are trying to control others and often are failing to come to terms with their own failures. Typical behavior and conversations may concern:

  • Envy or jealousy
  • Criticism of partners, colleagues and friends
  • Complaining about their own lack of success
  • Blaming others for their own bad luck or failure
  • Obsession with themselves and their problems

Listen to these people talk and you will quickly discover that you need to avoid them at all costs because their negativity will drag you down. In addition, as much as you would like to help them, you are not qualified to do so.

Now, having looked at some of the best ways to judge a person, what about yourself? How do others see you? Why not take Dr. Phil’s quiz and find out. Can you bear it?

Featured photo credit: Jacek Dylag via unsplash.com

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