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17 Things Only Slow People Would Understand

17 Things Only Slow People Would Understand

Have you been called a “slowpoke”, a “sloth”, or just plain “slow?”  Have you ever been told to “speed up”, “hurry up”, “think fast”, or “spit it out”?  If you have, this article is for you!  You’re slow, you’re good at being slow, and you’re probably better off for it! This may be a fast-paced world, but you know that the quick way isn’t always the best way.  Here are 15 great reasons why you may be “slow.”

You Make Sure Everything is Correct

I learned within 10 minutes at my first job at Burger King that I would never make a good drive-thru “pusher.”  I was just too slow!  I knew how upset people got when their order was incorrect, and I think I spent 3 precious minutes bobbing my head up and down between the food in the carry-out bag and the overhead order screen.  Management quickly sent me back to front cashier.  Slow people can be very methodical.

You Want Everything to Be Perfect

Slow people can also be perfectionists.  This means it may take a long time to get the results, but they will be fantastic when you finally get them!  The last person to finish tests is often the person who is carefully checking answers.  I was one of those students who spent hours on my homework each night but also got straight A’s throughout my school career.

You’re Waiting for the Right Timing

If you’re slow, methodical, AND a perfectionist, you are also likely to be a procrastinator.  You know you’re not a slacker — you have very good intentions — you’re just afraid that your project may take a very long time.  In fact, this very article is past the due date!  The best thing for you slow, perfectionistic, procrastinators like me is to make sure you break those projects into manageable chunks and then schedule them in throughout the week, reworking your timing as needed.  If you can manage your time, you can put that perfectionism to great use!

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You Are in “the Zone”

Do people complain that you are slow at correspondence?  This may be because you find responding to e-mails, phonecalls, and texts very disruptive!  I often find that I get into a flow throughout the day, and responding to a “very important” phonecall or e-mail can throw a wrench in my productivity machine.  I feel much more at ease when I can sit down and respond to all my e-mails at once.

You Give Your Full Attention

I also much prefer completing one project at a time, which I’ve discovered is actually better for you!  Studies show that in order to multitask you actually need to split your brain activity, which means less focus and less efficiency! Remember that on your next job interview!  Finally, I’m uncomfortable answering the phone if I know my mind won’t be fully present.  This may make us the wrong choice as an emergency contact, but it makes us the right person for a heart-to-heart conversation.  When we talk with others, they know that we have time for them, and we’re not checking our e-mail while we’re doing it.

You Choose Your Words Carefully

Unfortunately, those who can spit out rapid-fire responses get noticed, while those with well-developed answers get the shaft!  Introverts in particular take quite a long time to process information.  They run their thoughts through a complex system of tests and tweaks before they are satisfied enough to share their response.  So, often others think they have nothing to say!  If you are one of those big analyzers, be sure to say, “Let me think on that a minute,” so that others know that you are still forming your response.  Also, remember to find a healthy balance.  Rapid-firers may regret speaking before thinking, but deep thinkers can fall into the trap of over-thinking.

You Think More Deeply

Not only do you spend quite a bit of time analyzing, you may go pretty deep with your thinking, too.  You prefer profound thoughts to small talk, and there is so much knowledge and learning to consider!  Deep thinkers may not be the life of the party, but if you ask the right questions — you might open Pandora’s box!

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You’re a Good Listener

Or maybe you’re not deep in thought. Maybe you’re actually listening!  Many people aren’t good listeners because they’re not giving their full attention to the person who is speaking; they’re too busy formulating what they will say next. Good listeners still their minds and do not form a response until the other person is finished.  These are the people that you really want to talk with because you know they’ll hear everything you have to say.

You Consider All of Your Options

Some may call you indecisive . . .  but how about open-minded?  I’m sometimes the last person to place my order because I won’t settle for “the usual.”  I’m brave enough to try something new but conscientious enough to thoroughly read the menu and try to make my best choice.

You’re An Artist

When it was time to go out, and I was running behind I used to joke to my partner that I was having a “girl moment.”  Truthfully, I was getting my inner artist on!  I would experiment with make-up, adding a little of this and taking away a little of that, looking at my face from every angle in the mirror.  And I would sometimes change my whole outfit 5 or 6 times because I just couldn’t find the top to match the bottom. And then it was accessories, accessories, accessories!  That’s also why we spend so much time trying on clothes?  We know what looks good, and we’re not stopping ’til we find it!

You Enjoy Your Food

Are you considered a “slow-eater”?  Good for you!  This is much better for your health.  As a classroom teacher, by the time I made it to lunch after wrapping up for the morning, I usually had 10-15 minutes to shovel down food.  During a visit to my chiropractor I asked about my issues with bloating, and I was amazed by the simplicity of his response: “Chew your food more slowly.”  Sure enough, my condition improved immediately after I changed my eating style!  Besides allowing your stomach to more properly digest your food, you slow-eaters are more likely to enjoy your food.  You’ll have more time to taste it, to smell it.  Slow-eating is encouraged to help prevent over-eating, as well.  If I’m craving a cookie, and I’ve crammed it down my throat, my body has missed the satisfying taste and smell, and I’m more likely to grab another one.  Slowing down your eating also gives your stomach a chance to catch up with your eyes!  Those who eat more slowly are more likely to recognize when their stomach is full and to stop eating when they are satisfied.

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You Want to Fully Get Something

How much do you remember of those tests you crammed for?  How much did you really get from that article you skimmed?  I enjoy a book much more when I take my time reading it.  I get a lot more out of a movie when I rewind parts that I missed.  The more you slow down, the more you understand.

You Care

Which gifts do you appreciate the most and remember the longest — the ones that took two seconds to buy or the ones that took careful thought and much effort? Some people will go on a hunt until they find that perfect gift.  Others make them, infusing their precious time and love into their gifts.  This past Christmas my dad’s gift to me was a beautiful miniature stained glass window of lighthouses (my favorite image) that he had created himself.  You can be sure that will stay in my window for the rest of my life.

You’re in the Moment

Do people complain that you walk too slowly, run too slowly, ride too slowly, or drive too slowly?  Besides being a safer person, you are also more likely to be relaxed and in the moment!  Think about those “Sunday drivers” that drive you crazy — or maybe you’ve been one of them!  Why do they drive so slowly?  They are relaxed.  They are not rushing to work or to an appointment.  They are spending the day with family and friends, in a state of peace, doing the things they love.  Isn’t that a great place to be?

You Enjoy the View

When you take a brisk walk through the park, do you remember the flowers that you passed?  Do you catch the birds that fly overhead?  I’ve found that I can’t remember much of what I did on the days that I rushed from place to place, and I don’t see any of the trail when I’m biking for speed.  My mom is notorious for lagging behind on nature walks because she stops every few feet to take pictures!  She says that taking pictures has opened up a whole new world for her.  She sees things that she never would have noticed before.

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You Want to Be Safe

There’s nothing wrong with slowing down and leaving yourself enough time to get where you want to go.  I’d prefer to be safe and read a book for a bit if I arrive somewhere early.  If people are honking behind you or passing you left and right — so what?  I’ll bet you have a great driving record and are less likely to be found in a ditch on those bad weather days!

You’re Worth the Wait

So what that you’re the last one ready, the last one to speak, or the last one done?  You’re worth it!  You take your time, you do it right, and it turns out well.  You’re a happier, more relaxed person, a genuine listener, a dependable employee, and you look amazing!

So, the next time someone tells that you are slow, take it as a compliment!  Know that by slowing things down you are enjoying the view and keeping your life from speeding on by.

Featured photo credit: Just Colorful Bubble by Victor Hanacek via picjumbo.com

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Last Updated on September 18, 2020

13 Helping Points When Things Don’t Go Your Way

13 Helping Points When Things Don’t Go Your Way

For the original article by Celestine: 13 Helping Points When Things Don’t Go Your Way

“We all have problems. The way we solve them is what makes us different.” ~Unknown

“It’s not stress that kills us, it is our reaction to it.” – Hans Selye

Have you ever experienced moments when things just don’t go your way? For example, losing your keys, accidentally spilling your drink, waking up late, missing your buses/trains, forgetting to bring your things, and so on?

You’re not alone. All of us, myself included, experience times when things don’t go as we expect.

Here is my guide on how to deal with daily setbacks.

1. Take a step back and evaluate

When something bad happens, take a step back and evaluate the situation. Some questions to ask yourself:

  1. What is the problem?
  2. Are you the only person facing this problem in the world today?
  3. How does this problem look like at an individual level? A national level? On a global scale?
  4. What’s the worst possible thing that can happen to you as a result of this?
  5. How is it going to impact your life in the next 1 year? 5 years? 10 years?

Doing this exercise is not to undermine the problem or disclaiming responsibility, but to consider different perspectives, so you can adopt the best approach for it. Most problems we encounter daily may seem like huge issues when they crop up, but most, if not all, don’t have much impact in our life beyond that day.

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2. Vent if you have to, but don’t linger on the problem

If you feel very frustrated and need to let off some steam, go ahead and do that. Talk to a friend, complain, crib about it, or scream at the top of your lungs if it makes you happy.

At the same time, don’t get caught up with venting. While venting may temporarily relieve yourself, it’s not going to solve the problem ultimately. You don’t want to be an energy vampire.

Vent if there’s a need to, but do it for 15 to 20 minutes. Then move on.

3. Realize there are others out there facing this too

Even though the situation may be frustrating, you’re not alone. Remember there are almost 7 billion people in the world today, and chances are that other people have faced the same thing before too. Knowing it’s not just you helps you to get out of a self-victimizing mindset.

4. Process your thoughts/emotions

Process your thoughts/emotions with any of the four methods:

  1. Journal. Write your unhappiness in a private diary or in your blog. It doesn’t have to be formal at all – it can be a brain dump on rough paper or new word document. Delete after you are done.
  2. Audio taping. Record yourself as you talk out what’s on your mind. Tools include tape recorder, your PC (Audacity is a freeware for recording/editing audio) and your mobile (most mobiles today have audio recording functions). You can even use your voice mail for this. Just talking helps you to gain awareness of your emotions. After recording, play back and listen to what you said. You might find it quite revealing.
  3. Meditation. At its simplest form, meditation is just sitting/lying still and observing your reality as it is – including your thoughts and emotions. Some think that it involves some complex mambo-jumbo, but it doesn’t.
  4. Talking to someone. Talking about it with someone helps you work through the issue. It also gets you an alternate viewpoint and consider it from a different angle.

5. Acknowledge your thoughts

Don’t resist your thoughts, but acknowledge them. This includes both positive and negative thoughts.

By acknowledging, I mean recognizing these thoughts exist. So if say, you have a thought that says, “Wow, I’m so stupid!”, acknowledge that. If you have a thought that says, “I can’t believe this is happening to me again”, acknowledge that as well.

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Know that acknowledging the thoughts doesn’t mean you agree with them. It’s simply recognizing the existence of said thoughts so that you can stop resisting yourself and focus on the situation on hand.

6. Give yourself a break

If you’re very stressed out by the situation, and the problem is not time sensitive, then give yourself a break. Take a walk, listen to some music, watch a movie, or get some sleep. When you’re done, you should feel a lot more revitalized to deal with the situation.

7. Uncover what you’re really upset about

A lot of times, the anger we feel isn’t about the world. You may start off feeling angry at someone or something, but at the depth of it, it’s anger toward yourself.

Uncover the root of your anger. I have written a five part anger management series on how to permanently overcome anger.

After that, ask yourself: How can you improve the situation? Go to Step #9, where you define your actionable steps. Our anger comes from not having control on the situation. Sitting there and feeling infuriated is not going to change the situation. The more action we take, the more we will regain control over the situation, the better we will feel.

8. See this as an obstacle to be overcome

As Helen Keller once said,

“Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experiences of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired and success achieved.”

Whatever you’re facing right now, see it as an obstacle to be overcome. In every worthy endeavor, there’ll always be countless obstacles that emerge along the way. These obstacles are what separate the people who make it, and those who don’t. If you’re able to push through and overcome them, you’ll emerge a stronger person than before. It’ll be harder for anything to get you down in the future.

9. Analyze the situation – Focus on actionable steps

In every setback, there are going to be things that can’t be reversed since they have already occurred. You want to focus on things that can still be changed (salvageable) vs. things that have already happened and can’t be changed. The only time the situation changes is when you take steps to improve it. Rather than cry over spilt milk, work through your situation:

  1. What’s the situation?
  2. What’s stressing you about this situation?
  3. What are the next steps that’ll help you resolve them?
  4. Take action on your next steps!

After you have identified your next steps, act on them. The key here is to focus on the actionable steps, not the inactionable steps. It’s about regaining control over the situation through direct action.

10. Identify how it occurred (so it won’t occur again next time)

A lot of times we react to our problems. The problem occurs, and we try to make the best out of what has happened within the context. While developing a healthy coping mechanism is important (which is what the other helping points are on), it’s also equally important, if not more, to understand how the problem arose. This way, you can work on preventing it from taking place next time, vs. dealing reactively with it.

Most of us probably think the problem is outside of our control, but reality is most of the times it’s fully preventable. It’s just a matter of how much responsibility you take over the problem.

For example, for someone who can’t get a cab for work in the morning, he/she may see the problem as a lack of cabs in the country, or bad luck. However, if you trace to the root of the problem, it’s probably more to do with (a) Having unrealistic expectations of the length of time to get a cab. He/she should budget more time for waiting for a cab next time. (b) Oversleeping, because he/she was too tired from working late the previous day. He/she should allocate enough time for rest next time. He/she should also pick up better time management skills, so as to finish work in lesser time.

11. Realize the situation can be a lot worse

No matter how bad the situation is, it can always be much worse. A plus point vs. negative point analysis will help you realize that.

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12. Do your best, but don’t kill yourself over it

No matter how bad your situation may seem, do your best, but don’t kill yourself over it. Life is too beautiful to worry so much over daily issues. Take a step back (#1), give yourself a break if you need to (#6), and do what you can within your means (#9). Everything else will unfold accordingly. Worrying too much about the outcome isn’t going to change things or make your life any better.

13. Pick out the learning points from the encounter

There’s something to learn from every encounter. What have you learned from this situation? What lessons have you taken away?

After you identify your learning points, think about how you’re going to apply them moving forward. With this, you’ve clearly gained something from this encounter. You’ve walked away a stronger, wiser, better person, with more life lessons to draw from in the future.

Get the manifesto version of this article: [Manifesto] What To Do When Things Don’t Go Your Way

Featured photo credit: Alice Donovan Rouse via unsplash.com

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