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15 Things To Tell Yourself Today To Live Better

15 Things To Tell Yourself Today To Live Better

Calling yourself an unworthy idiot might be high up there as one of the worst things you can do if you want to improve your life. But admit it, we sometimes say things like that to ourselves. Your mind is truly listening to everything you say. Do you want to improve your daily life? Here’s a list of things to tell yourself today!

1. I Will Fight For What I Want

It is important to be strong, mentally. For instance, if you really want to lose weight, you need to be confident that you can do it. Tell yourself that you deserve more from life. You deserve to be healthy. You deserve to be the sexiest guy or girl in the room. Now, be brave and go get it!

2. I Am Proud Of Who I Am

We all come from different backgrounds, and there’s no shame in who you are. It is important that you walk tall, and embrace your individuality. Did you fail in the past? It doesn’t matter. You now have the opportunity to do things better. Keep your chin held high and let the world see that you’re proud.

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3. I Have A Reason To Smile

Not every day is going to go your way. Your car might run out of gas, you might be late for work, or you might be behind on bills. No matter what’s happening, you need to stand back and say to yourself, “I have a reason to smile.” Think of all the good things in your life. Having a positive attitude is the key to turning things around for yourself.

4. I Do The Best I Can

There are situations where you won’t come out on top. For instance, not every athlete will win every competition they’re in. The point is that you are trying your best to be a winner. Focus on that, and you’re sure to live better.

5. I Will Make Time For My Goals Today

More and more people are living with very full schedules – work, kids, sports, spouse – and it often seems like there isn’t enough time to get everything done in one day. However, if you tell yourself in the morning that you will make time to accomplish your goals, you will find that you have more time than you thought.

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6. I Am Worth Something

There are days that you might feel worthless, like you’re not doing enough, but most of this is due to a negative attitude. If you wake up every morning and tell yourself that you are worth something to someone, even if it’s your kids, your spouse, or even your parents, you will feel much better. A positive attitude is the foundation for living better.

7. I Will Accomplish Something Today

Similar to making time to accomplish your goals in one day, you need to make sure you accomplish something. For instance, if you haven’t done the laundry in a few days, or you haven’t played a board game with your kids, set that as your goal for today. Take small steps, focusing on one goal each day. Accomplishing something, no matter how small, is better than accomplishing nothing.

8. I Will Make Today Count

Each day it is important to go on living your life to the fullest. You want to go out and do what you can and always strive to be the best person that you can be.

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9. I Will Help Someone Today

Being a good Samaritan is a great way to live better, and to feel better about the person you are. Whether you help an elderly person cross the street, or retrieve a kite from a tree for a little kid at the park, you’re helping someone, which in turn helps you.

10. I Will Think Good Thoughts

As I mentioned, positive thinking is the key to being successful and living better. You want to push the negative thoughts out of your mind, and focus on only those that are positive, even when negativity starts to creep in.

11. I Will Enjoy Today

Again, you need to think positively about today, and remember to enjoy the time you have on this earth. Make sure you do at least one ‘just for fun’ activity each day. Having joy in your heart and mind is essential to living better.

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12. I Am Strong

Many people think that they can’t accomplish certain goals because they aren’t ‘strong’ enough to do so. It is important that you realize you can accomplish anything you set your mind to, and that you are stronger than you think.

13. I Am In Charge Of My Life

Once you come to the realization that you are in charge of your life, you will begin to live better. It is the choices you make each day that make you who you are. You have control of those choices, so you can definitely choose to be better and to live better.

14. I Believe In The Impossible

You will run into people who think your goals and dreams are impossible. In response simply say, “I believe in the impossible.” This means that you believe your dreams will come true if you just live the right way, work hard, and be determined. Remember, if you believe it, you can achieve it.

15. I Will Not Believe The Naysayers

When trying to live better, it’s important to put some other people out of your mind – the naysayers, that is. People who bring you down, tell you that you aren’t worth it, that you aren’t strong, and that you can’t do anything, are people you should ignore. You want to bring positivity to your life, so do away with the negativity.

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Last Updated on January 15, 2021

7 Ways To Have More Confident Body Language

7 Ways To Have More Confident Body Language

The popular idiomatic saying that “actions speak louder than words” has been around for centuries, but even to this day, most people struggle with at least one area of nonverbal communication. Consequently, many of us aspire to have more confident body language but don’t have the knowledge and tools necessary to change what are largely unconscious behaviors.

Given that others’ perceptions of our competence and confidence are predominantly influenced by what we do with our faces and bodies, it’s important to develop greater self-awareness and consciously practice better posture, stance, eye contact, facial expressions, hand movements, and other aspects of body language.

Posture

First things first: how is your posture? Let’s start with a quick self-assessment of your body.

  • Are your shoulders slumped over or rolled back in an upright posture?
  • When you stand up, do you evenly distribute your weight or lean excessively to one side?
  • Does your natural stance place your feet relatively shoulder-width apart or are your feet and legs close together in a closed-off position?
  • When you sit, does your lower back protrude out in a slumped position or maintain a straight, spine-friendly posture in your seat?

All of these are important considerations to make when evaluating and improving your posture and stance, which will lead to more confident body language over time. If you routinely struggle with maintaining good posture, consider buying a posture trainer/corrector, consulting a chiropractor or physical therapist, stretching daily, and strengthening both your core and back muscles.

Facial Expressions

Are you prone to any of the following in personal or professional settings?

  • Bruxism (tight, clenched jaw or grinding teeth)
  • Frowning and/or furrowing brows
  • Avoiding direct eye contact and/or staring at the ground

If you answered “yes” to any of these, then let’s start by examining various ways in which you can project confident body language through your facial expressions.

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1. Understand How Others Perceive Your Facial Expressions

A December 2020 study by UC Berkeley and Google researchers utilized a deep neural network to analyze facial expressions in six million YouTube clips representing people from over 140 countries. The study found that, despite socio-cultural differences, people around the world tended to use about 70% of the same facial expressions in response to different emotional stimuli and situations.[1]

The study’s researchers also published a fascinating interactive map to demonstrate how their machine learning technology assessed various facial expressions and determined subtle differences in emotional responses.

This study highlights the social importance of facial expressions because whether or not we’re consciously aware of them—by gazing into a mirror or your screen on a video conferencing platform—how we present our faces to others can have tremendous impacts on their perceptions of us, our confidence, and our emotional states. This awareness is the essential first step towards

2. Relax Your Face

New research on bruxism and facial tension found the stresses and anxieties of Covid-19 lockdowns led to considerable increases in orofacial pain, jaw-clenching, and teeth grinding, particularly among women.[2]

The National Institute of Dental and Craniofacial Research estimates that more than 10 million Americans alone have temporomandibular joint dysfunction (TMJ syndrome), and facial tension can lead to other complications such as insomnia, wrinkles, dry skin, and dark, puffy bags under your eyes.[3])

To avoid these unpleasant outcomes, start practicing progressive muscle relaxation techniques and taking breaks more frequently throughout the day to moderate facial tension.[4] You should also try out some biofeedback techniques to enhance your awareness of involuntary bodily processes like facial tension and achieve more confident body language as a result.[5]

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3. Improve Your Eye Contact

Did you know there’s an entire subfield of kinesic communication research dedicated to eye movements and behaviors called oculesics?[6] It refers to various communication behaviors including direct eye contact, averting one’s gaze, pupil dilation/constriction, and even frequency of blinking. All of these qualities can shape how other people perceive you, which means that eye contact is yet another area of nonverbal body language that we should be more mindful of in social interactions.

The ideal type (direct/indirect) and duration of eye contact depends on a variety of factors, such as cultural setting, differences in power/authority/age between the parties involved, and communication context. Research has shown that differences in the effects of eye contact are particularly prominent when comparing East Asian and Western European/North American cultures.[7]

To improve your eye contact with others, strive to maintain consistent contact for at least 3 to 4 seconds at a time, consciously consider where you’re looking while listening to someone else, and practice eye contact as much as possible (as strange as this may seem in the beginning, it’s the best way to improve).

3. Smile More

There are many benefits to smiling and laughing, and when it comes to working on more confident body language, this is an area that should be fun, low-stakes, and relatively stress-free.

Smiling is associated with the “happiness chemical” dopamine and the mood-stabilizing hormone, serotonin. Many empirical studies have shown that smiling generally leads to positive outcomes for the person smiling, and further research has shown that smiling can influence listeners’ perceptions of our confidence and trustworthiness as well.

4. Hand Gestures

Similar to facial expressions and posture, what you do with your hands while speaking or listening in a conversation can significantly influence others’ perceptions of you in positive or negative ways.

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It’s undoubtedly challenging to consciously account for all of your nonverbal signals while simultaneously trying to stay engaged with the verbal part of the discussion, but putting in the effort to develop more bodily awareness now will make it much easier to unconsciously project more confident body language later on.

5. Enhance Your Handshake

In the article, “An Anthropology of the Handshake,” University of Copenhagen social anthropology professor Bjarke Oxlund assessed the future of handshaking in wake of the Covid-19 pandemic:[8]

“Handshakes not only vary in function and meaning but do so according to social context, situation and scale. . . a public discussion should ensue on the advantages and disadvantages of holding on to the tradition of shaking hands as the conventional gesture of greeting and leave-taking in a variety of circumstances.”

It’s too early to determine some of the ways in which Covid-19 has permanently changed our social norms and professional etiquette standards, but it’s reasonable to assume that handshaking may retain its importance in American society even after this pandemic. To practice more confident body language in the meantime, the video on the science of the perfect handshake below explains what you need to know.

6. Complement Your Verbals With Hand Gestures

As you know by now, confident communication involves so much more than simply smiling more or sounding like you know what you’re talking about. What you do with your hands can be particularly influential in how others perceive you, whether you’re fidgeting with an object, clenching your fists, hiding your hands in your pockets, or calmly gesturing to emphasize important points you’re discussing.

Social psychology researchers have found that “iconic gestures”—hand movements that appear to be meaningfully related to the speaker’s verbal content—can have profound impacts on listeners’ information retention. In other words, people are more likely to engage with you and remember more of what you said when you speak with complementary hand gestures instead of just your voice.[9]

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Further research on hand gestures has shown that even your choice of the left or right hand for gesturing can influence your ability to clearly convey information to listeners, which supports the notion that more confident body language is readily achievable through greater self-awareness and deliberate nonverbal actions.[10]

Final Takeaways

Developing better posture, enhancing your facial expressiveness, and practicing hand gestures can vastly improve your communication with other people. At first, it will be challenging to consciously practice nonverbal behaviors that many of us are accustomed to performing daily without thinking about them.

If you ever feel discouraged, however, remember that there’s no downside to consistently putting in just a little more time and effort to increase your bodily awareness. With the tips and strategies above, you’ll be well on your way to embracing more confident body language and amplifying others’ perceptions of you in no time.

More Tips on How to Develop a Confident Body Language

Featured photo credit: Maria Lupan via unsplash.com

Reference

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