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15 Things Only People Who Used To Travel Alone Would Understand

15 Things Only People Who Used To Travel Alone Would Understand

Are you a solo traveler? Travelling alone can be scary, rewarding and fun in equal measures, and it can help you to grow as a person.

Check out 15 things only solo travelers would understand.

1. You Will Never Come Back The Same Person

Traveling the world alone normally means you will arrive home a better person; it will renew your spirit and make you feel energized. You become more self-aware and open with every trip, and you will have more confidence within yourself.

2. You Are In Control Of Your Emotions

Solo travelers experience various levels of stress on a regular basis, from timing flight connections to misplaced hotel rooms. You quickly teach yourself not to get upset or angry easily, and you know how to remain calm even when you are feeling worried.

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3. You Are A Great Negotiator

Any solo traveler understands the importance of negotiation, as it is often necessary to negotiate when you need something or you are being taken advantage of.

Solo travelers can’t rely on their friends to back them up, so instead they teach themselves to become master negotiators – handy!

4. You Can Live In The Moment

Solo travelers know how to live in the moment – you are only in a set place for a limited amount of time, so you know how to seize the day. It doesn’t matter that there is a thunderstorm happening outside, you will make it to that outdoor wine festival!

5. You Will Learn Something From Every Place You Visit

Every location and culture is different to the next, and there is so much to see and learn. When you travel alone you get the chance to truly connect with your location, and you always end up learning something new about the world whenever you go.

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6. You Understand The Importance Of Leaving Your Comfort Zone

If you can travel to an unknown country alone, you are probably pretty good at leaving your comfort zone. You are very happy to push yourself, because know the best experiences happen outside of your comfort zone.

7. You Don’t Have To Commit

One of the best parts of being a solo traveler is not having to commit; you can cancel and change plans without annoying anybody, you can change your destination on the spur of the moment, and if you love a place, you can stay as long as you’d like!

8. Your Perspective Is Always Changing

Being a solo traveler means you really get the chance to speak to strangers and connect with them. Every time you speak to others abroad you see the world through their eyes, and your perspective changes slightly, and can make you more open-minded.

9. You Know How To Ignore Fear

You have dealt with fear before; what if traveling alone is scary? What if I lose my passport while I am away? Despite these worries, you ignored the fear so you could experience traveling alone. Now you can often ignore the fear, because you know you are capable of dealing with anything.

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10. You Are Aware Of Your Strength

You have traveled hundreds of miles alone, paid for out of your own bank account, following a plan that you made yourself. You have learned how to roll with the punches, and you are aware of your how strong and capable you can be.

11. You Trust Yourself

You have to trust yourself if you are planning on travelling solo; no-one else will book your flights and arrange hostels. You know you won’t let yourself down, and if anything bad happens you trust yourself to fix it.

12. You Know How Important Other People Are

As well as trusting yourself, you value others highly. Travelling alone means you have to rely on strangers all the time, from cab drivers to the customer service desk in the airport. You accept that you are not always in control, and you can rely on others to help and assist you.

13. You Know Yourself Well

Spending time alone is the perfect way to really get to know yourself. You love the people in your life, but you also love how travelling solo gives you the opportunity to spend some quality time with yourself.

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14. You Can Fake Confidence

Often there are a few semi-disasters per trip, from losing your room key to getting lost on the way back to the hostel. Solo travelers have to fake confidence regularly to help solve problems, which often helps them to become genuinely confident people later in life.

15. You Want To Travel Solo Again

You’re happy to travel with friends or your partner, but you know at some point you will travel alone again. You get to truly connect with the country you’re visiting, you can do whatever you want and you get to spend some quality time with yourself – perfection.

Featured photo credit: Man Celebrating Freedom In nature With Glacier/Dan Cooper via stokpic.com

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Amy Johnson

Freelance writer, editor and social media manager.

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Last Updated on December 17, 2018

Why You Think You’re Not Good Enough and How To Believe in Yourself

Why You Think You’re Not Good Enough and How To Believe in Yourself

Have you ever wanted to say something at work, but a little voice of doubt crept in and said, “what if you are wrong”?

Maybe you wanted to apply for that promotion or ask that special someone on a date, but something kept you from taking action. When you think you’re not good enough, you tend to fear the outcome and lack faith in your abilities. That is why it is vital you discover how to believe in yourself so you can accomplish your goals and create your dream life.

Whatever your situation, the fears and self-doubt your false beliefs create will always stop you in your tracks. Identifying the beliefs that cause you to sabotage your life is the first step to removing them.

Self-doubt causes inaction, and inaction leads to regret. When you are not following your passion and living your dream life, you are left with a lot of questions:

  • What if I took a chance on myself?
  • Could I have had a better life if I took more risks?
  • Am I be satisfied with the legacy I am leaving behind?
  • What could I have accomplished if I did not settle for less?

So why would you think you’re not good enough?

1. Parenting

The perception you have of yourself is based on your past experiences. There are studies that show children mimic everything from their parents ability to regulate emotions, to their parents belief about money.[1]

I have had clients who did not believe they were good enough because they did not receive any positive reinforcement as a child. When they were young, their parents were extremely overprotective.

Think of your childhood challenges like dragons you had to slay. Each obstacle you overcame was another dragon you successfully removed from your life. As you slay more dragons, your self-esteem and confidence increase. When someone has overprotective parents, their parents end up slaying the dragons.

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As a result, the child builds more confidence in their parent’s abilities, while still doubting their own.

If you are never encouraged to slay your own dragons, you start to doubt whether you can. It is only natural for a child to conclude their parents are always helping them because they think they need it. This child ages into an adult who still believes they are not good enough. They seek the help and confirmation of others, and they rarely stand-up to opposition.

Solution: Slay Your Dragons!

If you want to believe in yourself, you are going to have to take steps to rebuild your trust in yourself. Start by keeping your word to others and arriving on-time. By showing yourself that others can (and do) trust you, you are going to feel more comfortable trusting yourself.

As you move onto larger and more challenging tasks, you have built a foundation of trust in your ability to keep your word. Next, you are going to want to reclaim your sword from others. At first, you may want to confide in whoever it is currently slaying your dragons.

Understand if it is your parent or someone who loves you, they want the best for you and mean well. You are simply going to tell them that you want to do the work, and will ask them for their thoughts in the planning phase. Feel free to check in with them and give them updates on your progress, while making sure they understand you are wanting to do the work yourself.

Then when the task is completed, let them know so you can celebrate together. Now that you have slayed your own dragon, you can start to reclaim your confidence. By you utilizing them as your guide, you get the added bonus of someone you respect and admire, telling you how amazing you are.

Think of it like a symbolic passing of the torch. Now, you are both dragon slayers. Which means all the positive attributes you attributed to them slaying your dragons, now belong to you.

2. Over-Exaggerating and Oversimplifying

Your past experiences may involve you or someone close to you failing. When you experience failure, you can lose your desire to continue. This has less to do with whether you are brave or scared, and more to do with the fact that your mind does not like failure.

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No one enjoys participating in events in which they under-perform. Outside of the usual reasons of embarrassment, feelings of inadequacy, and fear of failure – it is simply not fun.

Who wants to play baseball if they strikeout every time it is their turn? Would you enjoy singing in front of an audience if you were booed off the stage every time you performed? I could go on, but I think you get the point.

The thing about those two examples is no one really strikes out “every” at-bat. It is also unlikely someone could be booed off the stage “every time” they performed in-front of an audience.

What ends up happening is you oversimplify and exaggerate your past experiences and then your mind believes you. If you believe you are not good enough to ask someone on a date because they “always” tell you no, then do not be surprised you never muster the courage to do so.

If you want to overcome these feelings of inadequacy, start by changing your beliefs. This exercise does not need to be complicated. If you believe you strikeout every time it is your turn, I want to you to go to a batting cage and keep swinging until you hit the baseball.

When you experience success, I want you to take a mental note, write it down, or have someone video it. This is your proof that you do not always strike out. Then, whenever your belief that you are not good enough resurfaces, you are going to replay that video.

Regardless of the situation, you can find a successful experience that you are overlooking.

Solution: Read About the Failures of Others

It sounds a little crazy, I know, but reading about the failures of other successful people will improve your confidence. In a study conducted by Columbia University, they found that teaching students about the failures of great scientists encouraged them to do better.[2]

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When you are battling fear and self-doubt, you tend to over-exaggerate the abilities of others and diminish your own by comparison. You start to believe the successful are successful because they are courageous risk-takers, who do not take no for an answer. You tell yourself, they are meant to succeed, while you on the other hand are not.

When you are able to relate to the successful, you start to realize they have the same struggles and challenges you do. The only difference is they kept going.

Now it is not a question of whether you can succeed, it is a question of whether you want to succeed.

3. Undervalue Yourself

What is the main difference between someone who believes they are good enough and someone who does not? The person who believes they are good enough understands they are a person of value.

What I mean by this is if you do not believe you are worth being listened to, you will not have anything to say. If you do not believe you are good enough to be respected and treated as such, you will accept and rationalize all kinds of mistreatment.

There is an old saying that we are treated as we allow ourselves to be treated. When someone has the confidence and self-esteem that commands respect, they will not accept being treated any kind of way. However, if someone does not see themselves as worthy, they will remain in toxic situations because they do not believe anything better is on the horizon.

Dr. Jennifer Crocker, who worked on a series of self-esteem studies, found in her latest research that:[3]

“College students who based their self-worth on external sources–including appearance, approval from others and even their academic performance–reported more stress, anger, academic problems, relationship conflicts, and had higher levels of drug and alcohol use and symptoms of eating disorders”

Solution: Internalize Your Self-Worth

Instead of valuing yourself based on the awards, recognition, and accolades of others, you need to search internally. By basing your perception of yourself on your core values, you can regain control over self-image.

Instead of focusing on things that are outside of control, keep your mind on what it is that makes you special. You are not defined by your job, relationships, religion, or education. Rather, you are defined by the manner in which you participate in these things. You may be a creative, hard-working, and compassionate person; and that shows up in every thing you do.

Understand that you do not need to be creative, hard-working, and compassionate all the time to consider yourself these things. You are not trying to be perfect, but you are trying to connect with your true self.

By understanding the similarities in which you tackle objectives, you will build a consistent and powerful self-worth that stands apart from external confirmation.

Final Thoughts

Do not allow your past experiences do dictate your future success. You do not want to look back on your life and have a lot of questions and regrets.

Build trust in yourself by taking action today. This will help you build the confidence you need to believe in yourself and your ability to become the champion of your life.

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Featured photo credit: Riccardo Mion via unsplash.com

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