Advertising
Advertising

15 Things Not To Say About Yourself

15 Things Not To Say About Yourself

How you view yourself can make or break you. If you want success, watch out for these 15 things not to say about yourself.

1. “I wish I didn’t have such bad luck.”

The more opportunities you pursue, the better your “luck” will get. If you want something, go get it. Success comes from hustle (not chance).

2. “It’s too late for me, so why bother?”

It is never too late to change your life. Even the most damaged of us can rise from the ashes to take control of our life. See your age as an asset (not a liability). With years comes experience, and with experience comes knowledge.

3. “But what will they think about me?”

Getting caught up in what everybody else thinks about you is a sure-fire way to multiply your stress levels. Never sacrifice your true personality in an attempt to impress others. If a friend is worth having, they will appreciate you for who you are, not who they think you should be.

Advertising

4. “I’m so stupid.”

No one has all the answers, so ease up on yourself. We all have our own unique skill sets. Being bad at one thing doesn’t make you stupid. Instead of agonizing over your weaknesses, focus on developing your strengths and then use them as much as possible! The more you can do what you’re good at, the more confident you will become in yourself.

5. “No one will ever love me.”

How could you possibly know that? Answer: you couldn’t. And if you’re staying at home thinking about how no one loves you (instead of putting yourself out there so you could meet a potential new partner), you’re just making a bad situation worse. Mr. or Ms. Right won’t find you if you’re holed-up in your PJs. If you want to be found, act like it.

6. “I can’t do it.”

Don’t admit defeat before the race even starts. If it helps, think about the three biggest things you’ve achieved in your life. That could be graduating college, getting a promotion, starting a blog, landing a date, or whatever.

Got your three things? Now ask yourself, “What strengths did I use to achieve this specific thing?” for each item. Write down your answers.

Advertising

Notice any trends? If so, the road to success is right in front of you.

7. “I don’t think ______ likes me because they didn’t answer my text/call/e-mail.”

Jumping to conclusions like this displays a self-centered worldview. And besides, wouldn’t it be more likely that your friend/partner got tied up with class/work/(insert thing here)? People have things to do, so don’t assume it’s all about you.

8. “Life isn’t fair. If only things were better…”

No, life isn’t fair (and I hate to break it to you, but it never will be). There will always be good and bad things happening in your life at any given moment. This is beyond your control, so let it go. But whether you focus on the good or bad part is entirely up to you. You’re welcome to stress out about negative things you can’t control, but do know that won’t make you feel any better (quite the opposite). Keep your eye on the positive, because no matter how it looks right now, you’re doing better than you think.

9. “I hate my body.”

Please don’t say that. Whether you’re curvy, skinny, or muscular is irrelevant. Your body is a glorious vessel that carries you everywhere you go in this world. Take care of your body and it will take care of you. Getting caught up in what you see as imperfections is a waste of your precious time and energy. Don’t look for physical traits you dislike, but focus on the things about yourself that you find cute, handsome, or attractive. If you want to feel better about your (incredibly good-looking) body today, check out these 10 reasons why you are attractive.

Advertising

10. “I’m so embarrassed I wish I could disappear.”

I’m bet everybody reading this has spilled food on their shirt, dropped (and broke) a dish, tripped over a random object, and/or walked face-first into a wall (I can’t be the only one). If you have a goof in public and feel your cheeks flush, take a deep breath and tell yourself, “This isn’t a big deal.” For bonus points, make a quick lighthearted joke at your own expense to show you don’t take things too seriously.

11. “I’m out of his/her league.”

There isn’t such a thing as a “league” for you to be in or out of, so stop it with the negative self-talk. If you’re attracted to a person, say so.

12. “I can’t believe _____ got picked over me.”

Jealousy is a destructive emotion that does lots of harm and no good. If a co-worker got a promotion you hoped for, be a good sport about it. They probably deserve the position just as much as you do (and even if they don’t, it’s no reason to be hostile — it’s certainly not their fault you didn’t get picked). When rejected, your best bet is to transfer your negative feelings into positive action. Think you should have got the gig? Don’t gossip about it — prove it.

13. “It’s too hard.”

You know what’s really hard?

Advertising

Yeah…you don’t get to say anything is “too hard.”

If you can believe it, you can achieve it.

14. “I can’t trust anyone, I’ve been hurt too much.”

Funny thing about trust: the less you trust other people, the less they tend to trust you. Are all people worthy of your trust? Certainly not, but that’s no reason to be paranoid. Just because a past partner or two (or several) proved untrustworthy doesn’t mean everyone is out to get you, it just means you haven’t found the right person yet.

15. “I might as well give up.”

Life is like a video-game. No matter how many times you lose, you can push “Continue” as many times as you need to. You don’t lose until you quit, so don’t quit.

If you have any other things not to say about yourself that would be a great addition to this list, please leave it in the comments below.

More by this author

Daniel Wallen

Freelance Writer

9 Surprising Benefits of Being Single That No One Has Told You Before 7 Ways To Let Go Of Insecurity In Your Relationship How To Ask A Girl Out And Get A Yes (Almost) Every Time 7 Harsh Truths That Will Improve Your Life 20 Timeless Tips to Make the Most Out of Life

Trending in Communication

1 What Is Your Destiny in Life? How to Mindfully Achieve Your Purpose 2 7 Signs of an Unhappy Relationship That Makes You Feel Stuck 3 10 Things You Can Do Now to Change Your Life Forever 4 Meditation Can Change Your Life: The Power of Mindfulness 5 Understand Your Love Style & Learn to Love: Co Dependent Relationship

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on September 17, 2018

7 Signs of an Unhappy Relationship That Makes You Feel Stuck

7 Signs of an Unhappy Relationship That Makes You Feel Stuck

Relationships are complicated and when you’re unhappy, it can be difficult to tell what’s causing it and what needs to change.

Sometimes it’s as easy as opening up to your partner about your problems, while other times it may be necessary to switch partners or roll solo to get your mind straight.

When you’re in the thick of things, it can be difficult to tell if you’re unhappy in your relationship or just unhappy in general (in which case, a relationship may be just the cure you need).

Here’re signs of an unhappy relationship that is possibly making you feel stuck:

1. You’re depressed about your home life.

No matter what you do in life, you’re going to have good and bad days. Your relationship is no different.

However, no matter what you’re going through at home, you have to feel comfortable in your own home.

If you constantly dread going home because your significant other is there, there’s a problem. Maybe it’s something you already know about, everyone has an argument or just needs some alone time.

Advertising

When that yearning to be alone becomes an insatiable obsession over the course of months and years, it’s time to realize you’re not the exception to the rule.

You’re unhappy in your relationship, and you need to take a look in the mirror and do whatever it takes to make yourself smile.

2. You aren’t comfortable being yourself.

Remember all those things you discovered about yourself when you first got together? The way your partner made you feel when you met that made you fall in love with him or her in the first place.

If they don’t make you feel that way anymore, it’s not the end of the world. If your partner makes you uncomfortable about being you, then her or she is only dragging you down. It’s up to you to decide how to handle that.

You need to be comfortable with who you are. This means being comfortable in your skin and with the way you walk, talk, look, breath, move, and all the other things that make you uniquely you.

If the person who supposedly loves you doesn’t make you feel good about yourself, know that you can do better. They’re not even one in a billion.

3. You can’t stop snooping.

Mutual trust is necessary in any relationship. The only way to get that trust is with respect.

Advertising

I can find you anywhere online, no matter how private and secure you think you are. The odds of you having a password I can’t crack are slim. If we’ve met in person, I could install a remote key logger on your device without even touching it.

Finding your information online hardly takes a clandestine organization. Any idiot with a Wi-Fi-enabled device can cyberstalk you. I’m just the only idiot in the village admitting it.

So now that we know everyone snoops, it’s time to address your personal habits. Governments snoop because they don’t trust us. If you’re snooping on your partner, it’s because you don’t trust them.

It’s ok to have doubts, and it’s perfectly normal to look into anything that looks weird, but keep in mind that data collection is only half of an investigation.

If you find yourself constantly snooping and questioning everything, clearly there’s a trust issue and the relationship likely needs to end.

4. You’re afraid of commitment.

If you’ve been dating longer than a year and you aren’t engaged, it’s never going to happen.

Commitment is important. People will come up with a million ways to describe why they can’t be committed.

Advertising

No matter who you are if you like it, you need to put a ring on it. Find an engagement ring, stick a gemstone in it and marry the person. If you’re not legally able to get married or you don’t believe in it for one reason or another, have a child (or adopt one, however you’re able to) or treat your partner’s family like your own. It’s a huge financial and mental commitment.

If you’re not ready for one or the other after some time, don’t waste anymore of your precious life on the relationship.

Your relationship should be something that propels you forward. If it’s not going anywhere, make it an open relationship and call it what it is—dating multiple people.

5. You imagine a happier life without your partner.

If all you’re doing is imagining a happier life without your partner, it’s a sign that you’re in the wrong relationship. You’re unhappy and you need to get out.

Your partner should be included in your dreams. There’s nothing wrong with wanting a future with someone.

Try to remember what you dreamed of before you got your heart broken by the realities of life, love and the pursuit of human success.

Remember when you would crush on that cute kid in class? You would secretly imagine marrying him or her and going on an adventure—that’s the way life should be.

Advertising

If you’re not at least imagining adventures together, then why are you in that relationship?

6. You resent, rather than love your partner.

When a relationship starts to crumble, you begin to resent your partner for all the things you once loved about him or her.

When you’ve reached this point, your partner has reached at least No. 2 on this list. From your partner’s perspective, your unhappiness with them is picked up as bashing them for being who they are.

If you’re both unhappy in the relationship, it’s better if it ends as quickly and painlessly as possible.

7. You chase past feelings.

It’s okay to reminisce about the past, but if all you do is wish things were like they used to be, it’s a sign you’re not on the right path.

You’re unhappy and, at the very least, you need to have an open dialogue about it. This isn’t necessarily a sign that the relationship should end, but it definitely needs a spark.

When you talk to your partner candidly about what it is you’re looking for, you never know how they’ll react. The risk alone is worth it, good or bad.

Final thoughts

If you’re feeling stuck in your current relationship, it’s time to reflect about it with your partner. Don’t ignore these signs of an unhappy relationship as they will slowly go worse and harm both you and your partner in long-term.

Featured photo credit: josh peterson via unsplash.com

Read Next