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15 Things Emotionally Healthy People Do

15 Things Emotionally Healthy People Do

With more and more research connecting our emotional and physical health, it comes as no surprise just how important it is to take care of our emotional well-being. If you are like me and grew up in a household that put very little emphasis on this, it can be hard to understand what emotional health actually is, let alone how to start improving it.

Emotional health can be defined in a few ways: having high self-esteem, a solid sense of self, and being in control of yourself despite how you’re feeling.

Being able to acknowledge and then constructively express a wide range of emotions to others not only helps you handle life’s challenges better but will aid in building strong relationships. In the process of releasing unhealthy habits and beliefs, I came across these 15 habits that emotionally healthy people do:

1. They continue to grow their self-awareness

The first step in moving towards becoming emotionally healthy is self-awareness. When you practice self-awareness, you are able to see what habits and beliefs serve you and which do not. You can do so by engaging in self-reflection and self-analysis on a regular basis.

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2. They know their boundaries

Emotionally healthy people know their boundaries and aren’t afraid to stick to them. They know by doing so they are not only keeping themselves emotionally safe and happy, they will be of better service to others… even if that means saying no.

3. They forgive and repair damaged relationships, if possible

Emotionally healthy people forgive.  It may take time, but they allow themselves to grieve and work through any and all emotions that come up after being hurt. If possible, they repair damaged relationships, but they also know when it’s best to end a relationship for good.

4. They exercise and eat well

The mind, body, and soul are all connected. Healthy people understand how important each is in regard to the others. That means not only expanding your mind, i.e. reading, learning something new, meditating, but also moving your body and fueling it properly. You will be able to focus, perform, and sleep better.

5. They nurture their self-esteem

Healthy people understand their self-esteem will naturally go through highs and lows as the “seasons change.” They do not hold onto judgments about these changes but rather accept and nurture them.

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6. They practice flexibility

No, I’m not talking about yoga (although I’m sure yoga definitely helps with being emotionally healthy!) What I am talking about is being flexible with what life throws at you. Emotionally healthy people are adaptable. They can assess a new situation, how they’re feeling, and other reactions to it. They can then decide what is the best way to respond.

7. They place a high value on personal development

Healthy people understand the value of personal development. They grow and learn from mentors and people they admire. They spend a lot of time reading or listening to information about personal development so they can grow (kinda like you’re doing right now!)

8. They stay positive

You will rarely see an emotionally healthy person complaining about their life. Instead, you’ll see someone who can accept the current hand they’ve been dealt with positivity. They are problem solvers. They create opportunities to grow and do so willingly.

9. They practice gratitude

Practicing gratitude is a healthy way to attract more of the things you want in your life. If you want more love, be grateful for the love you already have. If you want more money, same thing. Healthy people understand and honor the law of attraction by practicing gratitude. They also understand by giving thanks you are shifting your thoughts onto the positive rather than the negative.

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10. If they are angry, they allow themselves to be angry

I know this appears to contradict the last two traits but listen, healthy people acknowledge, accept, and express exactly how they feel. They don’t hold it in or let it fester for long. If they’re mad, they allow themselves to feel mad. Same with being hurt, jealous, disappointed, frustrated or the like. The difference between emotionally healthy people and emotionally unhealthy people is they recognize that they feel a particular emotion and allow themselves time to process it. Once that happens, they tend to feel better!

11. They stay active and productive

Healthy people are always trying something new – volunteering at an animal shelter, building a new shed, learning how to ski or something that keeps their minds and bodies challenged. They know the beauty of life happens when you go out and live!

12. They know when to ask for help

Emotionally healthy people aren’t afraid to ask for help, or rather, they ask despite feeling afraid. They recognize it’s OK to get assistance at some point or another, whether it’s to help with emotional issues, relationship advice, or they’re in need of a dog sitter. When they need to, they will ask.

13. They take care of themselves

Self-care is vital in being emotionally healthy. These kind of people know when you need to refuel your bodies & minds and aren’t afraid to do so. They are also aware of their limits, their triggers and how to get back in balance.

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14. They follow their passions

Passions don’t live within us to be ignored. Emotionally healthy people work towards living a fulfilled life, and a major part of that is by following their passions. They understand if they don’t, they will always be longing for something and that is fertile ground for falling into unhealthy ways. Find your passion and follow it! It will lead you to love, I promise.

15. They love animals

You don’t have to own and love a cat, dog, rabbit, iguana, snake, or horse to be emotionally healthy. However, I bet there’s a lot of emotionally healthy people out there who are big animal lovers and have a beloved fur, or fur-less, baby that they consider family!

Featured photo credit: MorgueFile via mrg.bz

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Last Updated on May 22, 2020

What Makes a Good Leader: 9 Critical Leadership Qualities

What Makes a Good Leader: 9 Critical Leadership Qualities

The word “leader” makes you think of people in charge, high-ranking people: your boss, politicians, presidents, CEOs…

But leadership really isn’t about a particular position or a person’s seniority. Just because someone has worked for many years doesn’t mean s/he has gained the qualities and skills to lead a team.

Getting promoted to a managerial position doesn’t automatically turn you into a leader either. CEOs and other high-ranking officials don’t always have great leadership skills.

So what makes a good leader? What are the characteristics of a leader?

Good leadership is about acquiring and honing specific skills. Leadership skills enable you to be a role model for a team in any environment. With great leadership qualities, successful leaders come in all shapes and sizes: in the home, at school, or in the workplace.

The following are some of the many characteristics great leaders exhibit.

1. A Positive Attitude

Great leaders know that they won’t have a happy and motivated team unless they themselves exhibit a positive attitude. This can be done by remaining positive when things go wrong and by creating a relaxed and happy atmosphere in the workplace.

Even some simple things like providing snacks or organizing a team Happy Hour can make a world of difference. An added perk is that team members are likely to work harder and do overtime when needed if they’re happy and appreciated.

Even in the worst situations, such as experiencing low team morale or team members having made a big mistake at work, a great leader stays positive and figures out ways to keep the team motivated to solve the problems.

Walt Disney had his share of hardships and challenges, and like any great leader, he managed to stay positive and find new opportunities. In 1928, Disney found that his film producer, Charles Mintz, wanted to reduce his payments for the Oswald series. Mintz threatened to cut ties entirely if Disney didn’t accept his terms, and Disney chose to part ways. But in leaving Oswald, Disney decided to create something new: the iconic Mickey Mouse[1].

The key is to break down huge challenges into smaller ones and find ways to tackle them one by one.

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Think about the lessons you can learn from the mistake and jot them down because sometimes you win, and sometimes you learn.

2. Confidence

All great leaders have to exhibit an air of confidence if they’re going to succeed. Please don’t confuse this with self-satisfaction and arrogance. You want people to look up to you for inspiration, not so they can punch you in the face.

Confidence is important because people will be looking to you on how to behave, particularly if things aren’t going 100% right. If you remain calm and poised, team members are far more likely to as well. As a result, morale and productivity will remain high, and the problem will be solved more quickly.

If you panic and give up, they will know immediately and things will simply go downhill from there.

Elon Musk is a great example of a leader with confidence. He truly believes that Tesla will be successful, which he has shown many times through his actions. He converted 532,000 stock options at $6.63 each, their value on Dec. 4, 2009, before Tesla went public. It was a hefty bargain considering Tesla’s stock price stood at around $195 per share at that time. He doesn’t apologize for his beliefs and has drawn fire from just about everyone for his political actions.

You can’t instantly become a very confident person, but all the small things you do every day will gradually make you more confident:

  • List 5 things you like about yourself every day (something different every day), and you’ll appreciate yourself more.
  • Work on your strengths and do your best to enhance them.

3. A Sense of Humor

It’s imperative for any kind of leader to have a sense of humor, particularly when things go wrong. And they will.

Your team members are going to be looking to you for how to react in a seemingly dire situation. It would probably be best if you weren’t stringing up a noose for yourself in the corner. You need to be able to laugh things off because if staff morale goes down, so will productivity.

Establish this environment prior to any kind of meltdown by encouraging humor and personal discussions in the workplace.

As a president, Barack Obama exuded confidence and calm during stressful situations. But he was also known for his “dad jokes,”[2] his genuinely funny speeches at the White House Correspondents’ Dinner, and appearing on Zack Galifianakis’s Between Two Ferns.[3] Obama’s sense of humor made him grounded, realistic, and honest, which no doubt helped during some tense moments in the White House!

Learn to laugh at yourself. Confident people laugh about their own silly mistakes, and when you do this, others will also trust you more because you’re willing to share your experiences.

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Be observant and learn from the jokes others make. You can also get a lot of inspiration from the internet.

4. Ability to Embrace Failure

No matter how hard you try to avoid it, failures will happen; that’s okay. You just need to know how to deal with them.

Great leaders take them in strides. They remain calm and logically think through the situation and utilize their resources. What they don’t do is fall apart and reveal to their team how worried they are, which leads to negative morale, fear, and binge-drinking under desks.

Great leaders do, in fact, lead, even when they’re faced with setbacks.

Henry Ford experienced a major setback after designing and improving the Ford Quadricycle. He founded the Detroit Automobile Company in 1899, but the resulting cars they produced did not live up to his standards and were too expensive. The company dissolved in 1901. Ford took this in stride and formed the Henry Ford Company. The sales were slow and the company had financial problems; it wasn’t until 1903 that the Ford Motor Company was successful and put the Ford on the map.

Get to the root cause of any problem so you can prevent it from happening again and learn from the mistake.

By asking “why” 5 times (or more) on why something happened, you can find out the key factor that caused the problem and can find the best solution to tackle the problem.

You’ll also learn how to prevent this from happening again in the future after finding out a problem’s root cause.

5. Careful Listening and Feedback

This is far more complex than it actually sounds. Good communication skills are essential for a great leader. You may very well understand the cave of crazy that is your brain, but that doesn’t mean that you can adequately take the ideas out of it and explain them to someone else.

The best leaders need to be able to communicate clearly with the people around them. They also need to be able to interpret other people properly and not take what they say personally.

The Dalai Lama, as a symbol of the unification of the state of Tibet, represents and practices Buddhist values. The Dalai Lama’s leadership is benevolent and aims toward truth and understanding, alongside the other Buddhist precepts. This is a great example for all leaders: if you want to give good directions to others, you have to get feedback from others to understand the situation properly.

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Encourage communication between team members and establish an open door policy.

Practice not interrupting team members when they’re talking. Instead, summarize what they say and ask for feedback after you have talked about your ideas.

6. Knowing How and When to Delegate

No matter how much you might want to, you can’t actually do everything yourself. Even if you could, in a team environment that would be a terrible idea anyway.

Good leaders recognize that delegation does more than simply alleviate their own stress levels (although that’s obviously a nice perk). Delegating to others shows that you have confidence in their abilities, which subsequently results in higher morale in the workplace, as well as loyalty from your staff. They want to feel appreciated and trusted.

Although Steve Jobs was known for focusing in on the smallest of details, he knew how to delegate. By finding, cultivating, and trusting capable team members, Jobs was able to make Apple run smoothly, even when he had to be absent for extended periods of time.

To know when and how to delegate work to team members, you have to be very familiar with each of them:

  • List out all of their strengths, weaknesses, and personalities.
  • Talk with your team members more to know about their passion and interests.

Take a look at this guide and learn more about delegation: How to Delegate Work Effectively (The Definitive Guide for Leaders)

7. Growth Mindset

Any good leader knows how important it is to develop the skills of those around them. The best can recognize those skills early on. Not only will development make work easier as they improve and grow, it will also foster morale. In addition, they may develop some skills that you don’t possess that will be beneficial to the workplace.

Great leaders share their knowledge with the team and give them the opportunity to achieve. This is how leaders gain their respect and loyalty.

Pope Francis has been unusually popular with many Catholics and many non-Catholics. His position isn’t totally traditional, which is part of his appeal, but he also has admirable leadership skills. Pope Francis’s TED talk[4] drew attention because he encouraged leaders to be humble and to demonstrate solidarity with others. This inclusive, kind, and respectful style of leadership is incredibly important for any situation.

It’s important to spend time talking with other team members individually to understand them.

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Find out team members’ current challenges and try to give feedback and encouragement so they will grow and do better.

8. Responsibility

Great leaders know that when it comes to their company, work place or whatever situation they’re in, they need to take personal responsibility for failure. How can they expect employees to hold themselves accountable if they themselves don’t?

The best leaders don’t make excuses; they take the blame and then work out how to fix the problem as soon as possible. This proves that they’re trustworthy and possess integrity.

Howard Gillman is the chancellor of UC Irvine. You might have heard of how the university rescinded a bunch of acceptances, and then changed its mind[5], This past spring, an unusually high number of accepted students decided to matriculate; the school initially responded by rescinding offers over things like missed deadlines. But the college realized this was a mistake and reversed its decision. Gillman and the university accepted responsibility and decided to move past their earlier bad decision.

Always ask yourself what you can do better or what you should change. Take responsibility and think about what you can do better to prevent this from happening next time.

9. A Desire to Learn

It’s safe to say that all great leaders will have to enter unchartered waters at some point during their career. Because of this, they have to be able to trust their intuition and draw on past experiences to guide them.

Great leaders know that there’s always something to learn from everything they have experienced before. They are able to connect the present challenges with the lessons learned in the past to make decisions and take actions promptly.

You can either recall what you’ve learned from your memories or search your notes (ideally, a software that you can access anywhere with things well-organized).

Warren Buffett, one of the richest people in the world, has mostly made the right calls. But in dealing with huge amounts of money, Buffett has also made several multi-million (and sometimes multi-billion) dollar mistakes. He has stated that buying the company Berkshire Hathaway was his biggest mistake[6]. From that poor choice, he realized that it was unwise to pursue “improvements” and “expansions” in the existing textile industry. Despite mistakes like this, Buffett has invested wisely, and it shows.

To effectively learn from the past, write down lessons you’ve learned from any mistakes you’ve made. Have all the lessons well organized, and when similar things happen again in future, take these lessons as references.

The Bottom Line

Leadership traits are learnable. If you practice consistently, you can be a great leader, too.

Make small changes to your habits when you work with your team, wherever that may be. Most of us aren’t presidents or CEOs, but we all work with other people, and our actions always impact others. This gives every person the chance to develop leadership skills and to stand out from the crowd.

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Featured photo credit: Markus Spiske via unsplash.com

Reference

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