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15 Reasons Why Your Partner Should Be Your Best Friend

15 Reasons Why Your Partner Should Be Your Best Friend

Should you really be best friends with your partner?

Some people argue it’s better to have someone else other than your partner as your best friend. Such people may claim that a relationship with your partner is different from that with your best friend and that you shouldn’t put all your eggs in one basket.

While these people want a lover and lifetime partner, and even profess to “love” their partners, it can be argued they don’t really “like” their partner, which (if true) points to something disjointed in the relationship that should probably be looked into.

Of course, there are no hard and fast rules about what is right or wrong in relationships. What matters is whether something works for you. But, for the vast majority of people, coupling and even marrying their best friend works beautifully.

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It is arguably your best bet for finding true and lasting love. Here’s why there is nothing better than having your partner as your best friend.

1. You are more yourself in the relationship.

That’s because you are already close friends. You have no reason to feel self-conscious or act out in the relationship. And being your true self in a relationship is of paramount importance for a healthy union.

2. You are familiar with each other’s bad side.

As best friends, you know each others’ weaknesses, insecurities and dark sides all too well. In fact, you know each other so well that some reprehensible little habits have become strangely endearing.

3. You are more or less aware of each other’s relationship histories.

That means it’s unlikely there will be any serious surprises popping out of nowhere in your relationship since you share a common past.

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4. Your fights and disagreements are less damaging.

All couples have a few disagreements and fights from time to time. However, when your partner is your best friend, actual fights and disagreements that could easily spiral into full blown wars often start to fizzle out into playful fighting by the time they are over.

5. The process of adjusting to your partner’s tastes is much smoother.

That’s because you’re already accustomed to each other. You have a sense of what your partner likes and dislikes and know exactly what to expect of them. This means you’re both well equipped to deal with any arising issues.

6. You see each other in true form.

Best friends see beyond the façade we put on display publicly. They see right through to our well guarded selves within. When your partner is your best friend, he or she knows you for who you truly are and accepts you just the way you are. You have each other down to a science. So much so that you both know if you were ever to try anything fishy, you’d be able to bust each other immediately.

7. You have way too many inside jokes that no one else understands.

As best friends, the random laughing, singing and dancing that goes on between the two of you is the stuff of envy and admiration. You’ve even coined hilarious inside words and phrases that could quite possibly be incriminating, but aren’t.

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8. You can wear each other’s clothes.

It may be considered weird for lovers to wear each other’s clothes, but when couples are best friends, weird is often the norm. Hearing couples ask questions like, “Can I wear those sweatpants today?” is a totally normal thing that happens when your partner is your best friend.

9. You don’t have to call each other all the time to know that you have each other on the mind.

You can actually go a little while without talking to each other and be completely fine. You just don’t worry you’ll let your partner down because you know each other too well for such petty worries.

10. You have movies and TV shows that you watch together.

And if one of you were to watch one of them without the other, World War III would probably break out in your residence. But truth be told, it is just so endearing and warming when you watch your favorite movies and television shows together.

11. You can do fun, childlike things together.

As best friends, you’ve actually already done some pretty childish things together, like skipping instead of walking and licking the bowl of brownie batter. And you are not about to stop it, because you’re so comfortable with each other that embarrassment is no longer even a factor.

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12. You can be totally honest with each other.

Best friends tell each other the truth and trust one another more than anyone else. When your partner is your best friend, he can criticize you without you misunderstanding the intention behind it. You can also tell him when you think he’s being silly, and he has no problem with it.

13. You don’t worry your partner might say or do something silly in front of your family.

That’s because both your families have seen you two walk and grow together as good friends and as a couple for a long time. They’ve witnessed it all and are completely at ease and comfortable with you. Silly mistakes in front of your parents, ironically, endear them more.

14. You connect at a much deeper level.

It often seems like you always know what your partner wants even when they haven’t spelled it out. You are totally in sync, thanks in large part to the friendship foundation you have built, and have (and most likely will continue to) enjoy each other’s company for years.

15. You can see yourself growing old together.

Growing old with your best friend is the best thing that can happen – pun intended. Imagine having to spend your sunset years stuck with someone you can’t stand.

Fortunately, with your partner as your best friend, you don’t have to worry about that happening to you. Your love is based on genuine friendship, and blossomed into real love. Not everyone gets to have that in life.

More by this author

David K. William

David is a publisher and entrepreneur who tries to help professionals grow their business and careers, and gives advice for entrepreneurs.

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Last Updated on January 16, 2020

12 Simple Ways to Boost Your Confidence Right Now

12 Simple Ways to Boost Your Confidence Right Now

The way you feel about yourself greatly influences how you live and interact with others. If you are confident about yourself, you tend to see yourself positively and actually enjoy spending time with and around people. You don’t feel self-conscious or awkward around others, and that allows you to live your fullest and happiest life.

However, if you’re drowning in a sea of self-doubt, hesitancy and shyness, you often withdraw and isolate yourself from others and avoid interacting and connecting with people. That anxiety you feel in the pit of your stomach when you are around people is holding you back greatly and it is not good for your emotional health and overall well-being. You need to do something about it if you are low in self-confidence or have friends or family members who are not confident.

“Confidence isn’t walking into a room thinking you’re better than everyone, it’s walking in not having to compare yourself to anyone” – Anonymous

Here are simple, practical tips to boost your confidence right now and make you feel and act your best.

1. Stop labeling yourself as awkward, timid or shy.

When you label yourself as awkward, timid or shy, you sub-consciously tell your mind to act accordingly and psychologically feel inclined to live up to those expectations. Instead of labeling and entertaining negative self-talk, visualize and affirm yourself as confident and strong. Close your eyes for a minute and visualize yourself in different situation as you would like to be.

Be your own cheerleader. Experts believe that positive affirmation and good mental practices like picturing yourself winning or achieving a goal can lead to greater feelings of self-assurance and prepare your brain for success.[1] As the saying goes, “seeing is believing.” Picture yourself as confident and soon enough you will begin to manifest behavior that gives evidence to this new ‘fact.’

2. Recognize that the world is not focused on you (unless, of course, you are Kanye West).

That means you don’t have to be excessively sensitive about who you are or what you are doing (or not doing). You are not on the center stage; there is no need for preoccupation with self and perfectionism. As rap music star Rocko sings, “You just do you and I will do me, aight?”

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Forget about trying to please everyone or being perfect. Trying to be perfect and being a people-pleaser puts too much pressure on you and creates unnecessary anxiety. Besides, people are too preoccupied with their own issues to pay much attention to your every move unless, of course, you are a mega famous, super celebrity like Beyonce or Kanye West.

3. Focus on other people as opposed to yourself.

If you are low on confidence, self-conscious, nervous and shy in social situations, focus your attention on other people and what they are saying or doing instead of focusing on your own awkwardness.

For example, think about what it is that is interesting about the person who’s the centre of the party or the guy or girl you are talking with. Prompt them to talk more about themselves and be genuinely curious and interested in what they say. You will instantly come across as confident and warmhearted.

People generally want to talk about themselves, be heard and understood. They will love it when you’re eager and willing to listen to them and really hear what they have to say.

This habit of focusing more on what you love in others as opposed to what you dislike in yourself will not only help you become more assertive and comfortable in virtually all social situations, but also instantly make you feel great about yourself.

4. Know (and accept) yourself for who you are.

Chinese military general, strategist and philosopher Sun Tzu, author of the internationally acclaimed book The Art of War, said, “Know yourself and you will win all battles.” Even in the battle with lack of confidence, you will need to know yourself to win.

Knowing yourself starts with understanding that people are not all the same, neither are all social situation suitable for everyone. You might not be confident in large gatherings, but you could be bold and confident in one-on-one and small group interactions. We all have our own unique gifts and unique ways of expressing ourselves. Embrace yours!

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Introverts, for example, have a quiet confidence that is, unfortunately, often confused for shyness. They are naturally low key and prefer to spend time alone. However, this natural disposition affords them certain unique gifts, such as an ability to listen better than most people and notice things that others don’t.

Your uniqueness is where your strength and advantage lies. You won’t be comfortable and confident in all situations all the time. Albert Einstein said,

“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.”

5. Crack a smile.

If there is one sure way to instantly boost your confidence, it’s cracking a smile. Christine Clapp, a public speaking expert at The George Washington University, says that flashing those pretty, pearly white teeth will immediately make you appear both confident and composed. But, the effect of smiling is not just external. Studies show that smiling can also help nix feelings of stress and pave the way for a happier and more relaxed you.[2]

Not a bad return for something seemingly so trite, wouldn’t you agree?

6. Break a sweat—with exercise.

Working out is another great way to make yourself feel amazing and confident. Science has shown that exercising increases your endorphins, helps reduce stress, tones your muscles and makes you feel happy and confident.[3]

And hey, all you have to do is take a walk a few times a week and you’ll see the benefits. What seems to matter—as far as your confidence goes—is whether you break a sweat, not how strenuous your session is, which is pretty cool. Start working out now.

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7. Groom yourself.

This might seem mundane, but it’s amazing how much of a difference a shower and shave can have on your confidence and self-image. And when you spritz on a scent, the boost on confidence and self-esteem is incredible. As it turns out, your favorite fragrance does more than make you smell oh-so-nice.

A study found that a fragrance can inspire confidence in men. Interestingly, the study also found that the more a man likes the fragrance, the more confident he might feel. Another study found that 90% of women feel more confident while wearing a scent than those who go fragrance-free.

8. Dress nicely.

Another one that might seem trite, but it works. If you dress nicely, you’ll instantly feel good about yourself and give your confidence a real boost. That is largely because you’ll feel attractive, presentable and sometimes even successful in nice clothes.

While dressing nicely means something different for everyone, it does not necessarily mean wearing $500 designer outfits. It means wearing clothes that are clean, that you are comfortable in and that are nice-looking and presentable, including casual clothes.

9. Do activities you enjoy.

Whether it is reading a book, playing a musical instrument, riding your bicycle or going fishing, do what you really enjoy and what makes you truly happy often. It will boost your self-esteem, soothe your ego and allow you to identify with your gifts and talents. That will in turn bolster your self-belief and grow your confidence exponentially.

You might not become popular for doing what you love, but you might not even want to be popular at all. Being popular doesn’t make you happy; doing what you love does.

10. Prepare for the possibility of rejection / setback.

Late World No. 1 professional tennis player Arthur Ashe said, “One important key to success is self-confidence. A key to self-confidence is preparation.” You need to prepare for the possibility of rejection and setback.

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Why?

Everybody suffers rejection and setback at one point or another. You are not exempted. The question on your mind, therefore, should not be if you will be rejected, but how you will handle rejection when it comes.

Prepare yourself adequately in every situation to minimize the risk and effect of rejection and so that your confidence is not broken. For example, learn public speaking and rehearse what you are going to say beforehand if you have landed a public speaking engagement. That way, you are sure of yourself and confident you have what it takes to hack it. If you are rejected, don’t take it personally.

Rejection and setbacks happen to the best of us. Take it as a learning experience. Learn from your mistakes and move on.

11. Face uncomfortable situations square in the face.

Don’t run away from uncomfortable situations. Running away from people or situations because you feel scared, shy or timid only confirms and reinforces your shyness. Instead, face the situation that makes you uneasy square in the face. For example, go ahead and talk to that person you are afraid to approach, or go straight to the front of your yoga class! What’s the worst that can happen?

Prepare and be ready for any eventuality. The more you face your fears, the more you realize you are stronger than you thought and the more confident you get. This simple, yet admittedly courageous, act makes you unstoppable. You get comfortable being uncomfortable and begin to feel like you can take on the world. And that is the hallmark of someone destined for great things.

12. Sit up straight and walk tall—you are awesome!

Yes, sit up straight and believe you are awesome. Don’t slump in your chair or slouch your shoulders. Experts say the right stance can not only keep your self-esteem and mood lifted, but also lead to more confidence in your own thoughts.[4]

The way to sit is to open up your chest and keep your head level so that you look and feel poised and assured. And when you get up, stand tall and walk like you’re on a mission. People who sit up straight and walk tall are more attractive and instantly feel more confident. Try it now: you’ll feel fierce and confident just by sitting up straight and walking tall.

Featured photo credit: Freshh Connection via unsplash.com

Reference

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