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15 Reasons The Eldest Child Is Always A High-achiever

15 Reasons The Eldest Child Is Always A High-achiever

What do Oprah Winfrey, Sheryl Sandberg and Hilary Clinton have in common? They are all firstborn children. According to studies, if you are the first born child you have a solid chance of becoming more qualified and ambitious than your other siblings. Although many firstborn children may not agree with this notion and assertion, let us consider some reasons why the eldest child is a high achiever.

1.They are attended to the most

Before the arrival of siblings, firstborns do get most of the attention. It seems parents appreciate the arrival of firstborns and try to make an impact with them.

2. They have no one to teach them

They have to learn most of the things they know on their own. Unlike later siblings who have someone to instruct and pioneer them on the direction to go, firstborn’s do not have any one to look up to.

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3. They are surrounded with stability

Firstborn children are not bamboozled with the marriage crisis that somehow later erupts when love starts to dissipate. Firstborn children arrive into the stability of their parents who are still blossoming in the excitement of love.

4. They are more disciplined

While parents tend to relax a bit after the eldest child has a sibling or two, the eldest child is more scolded and disciplined than their siblings.

5. They have no early competition

When siblings emerge, they all start vying for recognition in different ways. One could be want to be a doctor, and another a musician. However the firstborn hits an early start in pursuing his interests with no competition appearing until later.

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6. They are given the most matured treatment

There is a theory that if you treat a child like an adult he or she will respond the same way. When the eldest child appears, he or she will grow accordingly to the intellectual culture of their home. Since there are no other young ones in the home, the eldest child grows in the intellectual culture that is already present in the home.

7. They are more pressured to succeed at school

According to a research eldest children face more pressure to succeed at school. This is as a result of parents having high expectations for their first children.

8. They are raised to lead

The eldest child are like surrogate parent towards his or her siblings. They fulfill parental roles towards their siblings when their parents are not around.

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9. They are raised to be responsible

Most times when things go wrong and mistakes are made, they are the ones who take the blame. They are nurtured to act responsible.

10. They grow up faster

Situations make the elder child grow up faster and adapt to tough situations. They get wiser while their younger ones are pampered through the process of growth.

11. They can deal with setbacks

As they grow older, the eldest child will not always have his or her way. They face setbacks, challenges early and they have to deal with them.

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12. They acknowledge hard work

They are quickly saddled with laborious or intellectual work as they grow. They become accustomed to working hard and being more resourceful.

13. They can sustain their budget

The elder child because of being responsible for not only themselves has to master the art of managing budgets and working with whatever limited resources they have.

14. They are disciplined

The discipline they receive from their parents build their focus and drives them to be more resilient and studious.

15. They are more down to earth

There were not many rooms for failures or cutting corners. The older one has to be a pacesetter to the younger. Thus they were more honest, truthful and sincere in proving to their parents that they could take charge.

Featured photo credit: http://www.pixabay.com via pixabay.com

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Last Updated on September 17, 2018

7 Signs of an Unhappy Relationship That Makes You Feel Stuck

7 Signs of an Unhappy Relationship That Makes You Feel Stuck

Relationships are complicated and when you’re unhappy, it can be difficult to tell what’s causing it and what needs to change.

Sometimes it’s as easy as opening up to your partner about your problems, while other times it may be necessary to switch partners or roll solo to get your mind straight.

When you’re in the thick of things, it can be difficult to tell if you’re unhappy in your relationship or just unhappy in general (in which case, a relationship may be just the cure you need).

Here’re signs of an unhappy relationship that is possibly making you feel stuck:

1. You’re depressed about your home life.

No matter what you do in life, you’re going to have good and bad days. Your relationship is no different.

However, no matter what you’re going through at home, you have to feel comfortable in your own home.

If you constantly dread going home because your significant other is there, there’s a problem. Maybe it’s something you already know about, everyone has an argument or just needs some alone time.

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When that yearning to be alone becomes an insatiable obsession over the course of months and years, it’s time to realize you’re not the exception to the rule.

You’re unhappy in your relationship, and you need to take a look in the mirror and do whatever it takes to make yourself smile.

2. You aren’t comfortable being yourself.

Remember all those things you discovered about yourself when you first got together? The way your partner made you feel when you met that made you fall in love with him or her in the first place.

If they don’t make you feel that way anymore, it’s not the end of the world. If your partner makes you uncomfortable about being you, then her or she is only dragging you down. It’s up to you to decide how to handle that.

You need to be comfortable with who you are. This means being comfortable in your skin and with the way you walk, talk, look, breath, move, and all the other things that make you uniquely you.

If the person who supposedly loves you doesn’t make you feel good about yourself, know that you can do better. They’re not even one in a billion.

3. You can’t stop snooping.

Mutual trust is necessary in any relationship. The only way to get that trust is with respect.

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I can find you anywhere online, no matter how private and secure you think you are. The odds of you having a password I can’t crack are slim. If we’ve met in person, I could install a remote key logger on your device without even touching it.

Finding your information online hardly takes a clandestine organization. Any idiot with a Wi-Fi-enabled device can cyberstalk you. I’m just the only idiot in the village admitting it.

So now that we know everyone snoops, it’s time to address your personal habits. Governments snoop because they don’t trust us. If you’re snooping on your partner, it’s because you don’t trust them.

It’s ok to have doubts, and it’s perfectly normal to look into anything that looks weird, but keep in mind that data collection is only half of an investigation.

If you find yourself constantly snooping and questioning everything, clearly there’s a trust issue and the relationship likely needs to end.

4. You’re afraid of commitment.

If you’ve been dating longer than a year and you aren’t engaged, it’s never going to happen.

Commitment is important. People will come up with a million ways to describe why they can’t be committed.

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No matter who you are if you like it, you need to put a ring on it. Find an engagement ring, stick a gemstone in it and marry the person. If you’re not legally able to get married or you don’t believe in it for one reason or another, have a child (or adopt one, however you’re able to) or treat your partner’s family like your own. It’s a huge financial and mental commitment.

If you’re not ready for one or the other after some time, don’t waste anymore of your precious life on the relationship.

Your relationship should be something that propels you forward. If it’s not going anywhere, make it an open relationship and call it what it is—dating multiple people.

5. You imagine a happier life without your partner.

If all you’re doing is imagining a happier life without your partner, it’s a sign that you’re in the wrong relationship. You’re unhappy and you need to get out.

Your partner should be included in your dreams. There’s nothing wrong with wanting a future with someone.

Try to remember what you dreamed of before you got your heart broken by the realities of life, love and the pursuit of human success.

Remember when you would crush on that cute kid in class? You would secretly imagine marrying him or her and going on an adventure—that’s the way life should be.

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If you’re not at least imagining adventures together, then why are you in that relationship?

6. You resent, rather than love your partner.

When a relationship starts to crumble, you begin to resent your partner for all the things you once loved about him or her.

When you’ve reached this point, your partner has reached at least No. 2 on this list. From your partner’s perspective, your unhappiness with them is picked up as bashing them for being who they are.

If you’re both unhappy in the relationship, it’s better if it ends as quickly and painlessly as possible.

7. You chase past feelings.

It’s okay to reminisce about the past, but if all you do is wish things were like they used to be, it’s a sign you’re not on the right path.

You’re unhappy and, at the very least, you need to have an open dialogue about it. This isn’t necessarily a sign that the relationship should end, but it definitely needs a spark.

When you talk to your partner candidly about what it is you’re looking for, you never know how they’ll react. The risk alone is worth it, good or bad.

Final thoughts

If you’re feeling stuck in your current relationship, it’s time to reflect about it with your partner. Don’t ignore these signs of an unhappy relationship as they will slowly go worse and harm both you and your partner in long-term.

Featured photo credit: josh peterson via unsplash.com

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