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15 Habits of Highly Miserable People

15 Habits of Highly Miserable People

The definition of a miserable person is wretchedly unhappy or uncomfortable. That is pretty spot on, don’t you think?

When a person is miserable, they never see or expect the good in anything and always try to make those around them feel just as bad and negative as them. Being miserable is a way of life for some people because they get sympathy, constant reassurance from other miserable people and a sense of self, defined by whatever circumstance they find themselves in.

If you are tired of being miserable and want a happy existence , I’ve come up with a few habits of highly miserable people that you can avoid. If you can identify and change one around, you’ll be well on your way to a good life again!

1. They’re never thankful for anything.

Being grateful and thankful for anything in a highly miserable person’s life is a big no!

When a person shows gratitude, they should do it from a point of view of happiness and are usually ten times more likely to be thankful for things they already have rather than the things they don’t.

A miserable person avoids any expressions of gratitude at all costs because it goes against what they believe. They think that counting their blessings is a waste of time and life will always be full of something to be ungrateful about.

2. They lead a very unadventurous life.

Highly miserable people lead a dull, boring and unadventurous life. They ensure to have a mundane existence, with no fun, no possibility or excitement and then complain about it!

When life is unadventurous and boring, they’ll start to believe that they are boring and project that upon other people.

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Life is predictable as far as a highly miserable person is concerned. TV is a big activity in this kind of life coupled with addiction and other mediocre activities such as reading tabloid papers and celebrity magazines, none of which stimulate or invigorate the body or mind.

3. They live in and glorify the past.

We’ve all done it, said things like ‘it was so much better when I was a kid’ except highly miserable people tend to live their lives stuck in the past rather than remembering it fondly and moving on.

They’ll talk about what has happened, what they have done and what it was like back then, saying that life has only gone downhill since.

When a highly miserable people vilify the past, they refer to it as being born in the wrong place at the wrong time, or life when they were a kid was unhappy and they never got what they wanted.

4. They do things for personal gain.

“All the happiness in the world stems from wanting others to be happy, and all the suffering in the world stems from wanting the self to be happy.” – Shantideva

Being self-centered and only doing things for personal gain is an extreme habit of a highly miserable person.

Life is about having and gaining more and getting it no matter how they get it, even at the expense of others. They’ll surround themselves with like-minded people and even take on ‘professions’ that involve criminal activities. They’ll have no qualm about taking from others or acting as if they are doing good whereas their intentions are not so.

5. They are afraid of economic loss.

Fear is a good habit to have if you want to be a highly miserable person.

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Fear keep miserable people from doing a job they absolutely hate; it makes them work long unbearable hours working for a company that doesn’t care about its employees.

They are greedy and stingy with money, generosity isn’t even in their vocabulary; and if it is, there is personal gain involved.

They’ll become ill because of their money worries, probably depressed and lose friends/family as a result. If they could, they’d sit and worry all day long, thinking about what they could lose if they took a risk, left their job or tried something different.

6. They love to pick fights.

Every now and again, a highly miserable person often picks a fight out of the blue with someone close to them. They usually pick a fight about something absurd and completely unrelated to their current situation.

Secondly, they expect that person to respond with kindness and sympathy and if they don’t, they’ll be quick to point it out. If however the other party mentions it again, they’ll be sure to make it seem as if they don’t know what they are talking about and that they never intended for the situation to occur. They’ll quickly act to be hurt and be the victim, even though they started the fight.

7. They blame others and play the victim.

Highly miserable people are brilliant at blaming their parents, because, after all, they were the ones who brought them to this world and shaped who they were.

Typically, they’ll also blame the bully who bullied them as a kid, a teacher who didn’t like them or a friend who never wanted to do what they wanted to do.

They simply can’t let go of the idea of playing the blame game.

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8. They think people’s intentions towards them are always dishonorable.

They’ll take any remark, comment or opinion the wrong way, believing that whoever gave it is trying to insult, belittle or put them down. They believe that humiliation is at the forefront of most people’s intentions of which will make a highly miserable person distrustful, resentful and always on the defense.

Miserable people expect the very worst from people and can’t imagine a person acting on good intentions.

9. They give themselves a negative identity and revel in it.

Highly miserable people let their perceived emotional problem absorbs their very core.

For example, if they suffered from anxiety, depression, grief of some sort, they’d define them as a person. They also try to make everyone know exactly what’s wrong with them. They make this the focus of their life, talking about it constantly, and bringing it up at every opportunity.

10. They get involved in others’ drama.

They are the center point of all the drama in their lives and others’. This includes family and community dramas.

They want to be the person that people will turn to, to share their miserableness with and to help carry the drama to new levels; exaggerating situations and consoling others with their own sorry stories about how life has dealt them a cruel hand.

11. They always expect the worst.

Life sucks and all the bad stuff happens to them, is the mantra of a miserable person.

Optimism for the future is nonsense and being positive will only be done in vain. To them, their marriage probably won’t work out, their children won’t love them, their house will fall apart and their job is an unbearable chore.

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12. They focus only on themselves.

Highly miserable people focus on themselves, their needs and their problems, as they believe that nobody else’s issues or struggles are as bad as theirs.

They worry all the time about why they do things, why they behave in certain ways, while analyzing their flaws and chewing over their problems.

13. They are critical of everything.

Nothing is good enough, nothing works and nothing makes a highly miserable person happy. They are critical of everything whether people agree with them or not.

Miserable people always voice their opinion before everyone else. They criticize something that someone loves just to make sure their point is heard. They love to antagonize and believe they are always right while everyone else is always wrong.

14. They worry too much.

Worry makes people miserable. Miserable people won’t listen to reasons and are obsessed with situations and things they have no control over.

Worrying feeds into their misery so it’s only natural that these types of people are worrisome by nature.

15. They are envious of other people’s success.

Miserable people won’t outright say they are envious of other people’s successes. What they will do however, is to put down other people’s achievements and successes by pointing out the negatives or downplaying the news so the other person’s excitement is immediately deflated.

When someone is happy, a highly miserable person will point out all that could possibly go wrong in great detail.

If you feel as though you have some or all the traits of a miserable person, now is the time to change so you can be a happier, cheerful and more successful person.

Articles to Change up Your Attitude

Featured photo credit: Fickr Miserable Soul – Mr.C90 via flickr.com

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Paula Lawes

Paula loves people and connecting. She writes about communication and relationships tips on Lifehack.

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Last Updated on July 3, 2020

30 Small Habits To Lead A More Peaceful Life

30 Small Habits To Lead A More Peaceful Life

In today’s world, true peace must come from within us and our own actions. Here are 30 small things you can do on a regular basis to increase your overall sense of harmony, peace, and well-being:

1. Don’t go to every fight you’re invited to

Particularly when you’re around those who thrive on chaos, be willing to decline the invitation to join in on the drama.

2. Focus on your breath

Throughout the day, stop to take a few deep breaths. Keep stress at bay with techniques such as “square breathing.” Breathe in for four counts, hold for four counts, then out for four counts, and hold again for four counts. Repeat this cycle four times.

3. Get organized and purge old items

A cluttered space often creates a cluttered spirit. Take the time to get rid of anything you haven’t used in a year and invest in organizational systems that help you sustain a level of neatness.

4. Stop yourself from being judgmental

Whenever you are tempted to have an opinion about someone else’s life, check your intentions. Judging others creates and promotes negative energy.

5. Say ‘thank you’ early and often

Start and end each day with an attitude of gratitude. Look for opportunities in your daily routine and interactions to express appreciation.

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6. Smile more

Even if you have to “fake it until you make it,” there are many scientific benefits of smiling and laughing. Also, pay attention to your facial expression when you are doing neutral activities such as driving and walking. Turn that frown upside down!

7. Don’t worry about the future

As difficult as this sounds, there is a direct connection between staying in the present and living a more peaceful life. You cannot control the future. As the old proverb goes, “Worry is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do, but it won’t get you anywhere.” Practice gently bringing your thoughts back to the present.

8. Eat real food

The closer the food is to the state from which it came from the earth, the better you will feel in eating it. Choose foods that grew from a plant over food that was made in a plant.

9. Choose being happy over being right

Too often, we sacrifice inner peace in order to make a point. It’s rarely worth it.

10. Keep technology out of the bedroom

Many studies, such as one conducted by Brigham and Women’s Hospital, have connected blue light of electronic devices before bed to adverse sleep and overall health. To make matters worse, many people report that they cannot resist checking email and social media when their cell phone is in reach of their bed, regardless of the time.

11. Make use of filtering features on social media

You may not want to “unfriend” someone completely, however you can choose whether you want to follow their posts and/or the sources of information that they share.

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12. Get comfortable with silence

When you picture someone who is the ultimate state of peace, typically they aren’t talking.

13. Listen to understand, not to respond

So often in conversations, we use our ears to give us cues about when it is our turn to say what we want to say. Practice active listening, ask questions, process, then speak.

14. Put your troubles in a bubble

Whenever you start to feel anxious, visualize the situation being wrapped in a bubble and then picture that sphere floating away.

15. Speak more slowly

Often a lack of peace manifests itself in fast or clipped speech. Take a breath, slow down, and let your thoughtful consideration drive your words.

16. Don’t procrastinate

Nothing adds stress to our lives like waiting until the last minute.

17. Buy a coloring book

Mandala coloring books for adults are becoming more popular because of their connection to creating inner peace.

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18. Prioritize yourself

You are the only person who you are guaranteed to live with 24 hours a day for the rest of your life.

19. Forgive others

Holding a grudge is hurting you exponentially more than anyone else. Let it go.

20. Check your expectations

Presumption often leads to drama. Remember the old saying, “Expectations are premeditated resentments.”

21. Engage in active play

Let your inner child come out and have some fun. Jump, dance, play, and pretend!

22. Stop criticizing yourself

The world is a hard enough place with more than enough critics. Your life is not served well by being one of them.

23. Focus your energy and attention on what you want

Thoughts, words, and actions all create energy. Energy attracts like energy. Put out what you want to get back.

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24. Assign yourself “complaint free” days.

Make a conscious decision not to complain about anything for a whole day. It might be harder than you think and the awareness will stick with you.

25. Surround yourself with people you truly enjoy being in the company of

Personalities tend to be contagious, and not everyone’s is worth catching. Be judicious in your choices.

26. Manage your money

Financial concerns rank top on the list of what causes people stress. Take the time each month to do a budget, calculate what you actually spend and sanity check that against the money you have coming in.

27. Stop trying to control everything

Not only is your inner control freak sabotaging your sense of peace, it is also likely getting in the way of external relationships as well.

28. Practice affirmations

Repeat positive phrases that depict the life and qualities you want to attract. It may not come naturally to you, but it works.

29. Get up before sunrise

Personally witnessing the dawn brings a unique sense of awe and appreciation for life.

30. Be yourself

Nothing creates more inner discord than trying to be something other than who we really are. Authenticity breeds happiness.

Featured photo credit: man watching sunrise via stokpic.com

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