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Last Updated on January 10, 2018

15 Habits of Highly Miserable People

15 Habits of Highly Miserable People

The definition of a miserable person is wretchedly unhappy or uncomfortable. That is pretty spot on don’t you think? When a person is miserable they never see or expect the good in anything and always try to make those around them feel just as bad and negative as them. Being miserable is a way of life for some people because they get sympathy, constant reassurance from other miserable people and a sense of self, defined by whatever circumstance they find themselves in.

Unfortunately, highly miserable people are much more accepted in society as opposed to someone that is happy and upbeat all the time, who can be looked at as ‘weird’ or ‘strange’.

If you are tired of being miserable and want a happy existence on this planet, I’ve come up with a few habits of highly miserable people. If you can identify and change one around you’ll be well on your way to a good life again!

They are never thankful for anything

Being grateful and thankful for anything in a highly miserable person’s life is a big no! When a person shows gratitude they should do it from a point of view of happiness and are usually ten times more likely to be thankful for things they already have rather than the things they don’t. If you are a miserable person, you’ll avoid any expressions of gratitude at all costs because it goes against what you believe. You’ll think that counting your blessings is a waste of time and life will always be full of something to be ungrateful about.

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They lead a very unadventurous life

Highly miserable people lead a dull, boring and unadventurous life. They ensure that you have a mundane existence, with no fun, no possibility or excitement and then complain about it! When life is unadventurous and boring, they’ll start to believe that they are boring and project that upon other people. Life is predictable as far as a highly miserable person is concerned. TV is a big activity in this kind of life coupled with addiction and other mediocre activities such as reading tabloid papers and celebrity magazines, none of which stimulate or invigorate the body or mind.

They live in and glorify the past

We’ve all done it, said things like ‘it was so much better when I was a kid’ except highly miserable people tend to live their lives stuck in the past rather than remembering it fondly and moving on. They’ll talk about what has happened, what they have done and what it was like back then, saying that life has only gone downhill since. When a highly miserable people vilify the past, they refer to it as being born in the wrong place at the wrong time, or life when they were a kid was unhappy and they never got what they wanted.

They do things for personal gain

“All the happiness in the world stems from wanting others to be happy, and all the suffering in the world stems from wanting the self to be happy.” – Shantideva

Being self-centered and only doing things for personal gain is an extreme habit of a highly miserable person. Life is about having and gaining more and getting it no matter how they get it, even at the expense of others. They’ll surround themselves with like-minded people and even take on ‘professions’ that involve criminal activities. They’ll have no qualm about taking from others or acting as if they are doing good whereas their intentions are not so.

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They are afraid of economic loss

Fear is a good habit to have if you want to be a highly miserable person. Fear will keep miserable people from doing a job they absolutely hate; it will make them work long unbearable hours working for a company that doesn’t care about its employees. They’ll be greedy and stingy with money, generosity isn’t even in their vocabulary and if it is, there will be personal gain involved. They’ll become ill because of their money worries, probably depressed and lose friends/family as a result. If they could, they’d sit and worry all day long, thinking about what they could lose if they took a risk, left their job or tried something different.

They love to pick fights

Every now and again a highly miserable person will pick a fight out of the blue with someone close to them. They usually pick a fight about something absurd and completely unrelated to their current situation. Secondly, they’ll expect that person to respond with kindness and sympathy and if they don’t, they’ll be quick to point it out. If however the other party mentions it again, they’ll be sure to make it seem as if they don’t know what they are talking about and that they never intended for the situation to occur. They’ll quickly act to be hurt and be the victim, even though they started the fight.

They blame others and play the victim

Highly miserable people are brilliant at blaming their parents, because, after all, they were the ones who brought them to this world and shaped who they were. Typically, they’ll also blame the bully who bullied them as a kid, a teacher who didn’t like them or a friend who never wanted to do what they wanted to do. Blame is essential; it must never be forgotten and used almost every single day to ensure miserableness is continued.

They think people’s intentions towards them are always dishonorable

They’ll take any remark, comment or opinion the wrong way believing that whoever gave it is trying to insult, belittle or put them down. They believe that humiliation is at the forefront of most people’s intentions of which will make a highly miserable person distrustful, resentful and always on the defense. Miserable people expect the very worst from people and can’t imagine a person acting on good intentions.

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They will give themselves a negative identity and revel in it

To be highly miserable they must, without doubt, ensure that any perceived emotional problem absorbs their very core. For example, if they suffered from anxiety, depression, grief of some sort they’d make sure it defines them as a person.  They also have the habit of making sure everyone knows exactly what’s wrong with them. They make this the focus of their life, talking about it constantly, and bringing it up at every opportunity. The highly miserable people will ensure that they know about their ‘condition’ inside and out, reading up on it and knowing all the symptoms.

They will make sure they are involved in other people’s drama

They will be the center point of all the drama in their lives and others’. This will include family and community dramas, so that they can be the person that people will turn to, to share their miserableness with and to help carry the drama to new levels. Exaggerating situations and consoling others with their own sorry stories about how life has dealt them a cruel hand.

They always expect the worst

Life sucks and all the bad stuff happens to them, is the mantra of a miserable person. Optimism for the future is nonsense and being positive will only be done in vain. Their marriage probably won’t work out, their children are bad and don’t love them, their house will fall apart and their job is an unbearable chore. If a disaster is going to happen, it will most certainly happen to these people, and they definitely won’t be surprised.

They focus only on themselves

Highly miserable people focus on themselves, their needs and their problems, as nobody else’s issues or struggles are as bad as theirs. They will worry all the time about why they do things, why they behave in certain ways, while analyzing their flaws and chewing over their problems.

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They are critical of everything

Nothing is good enough, nothing works and nothing makes a highly miserable person happy. They will be critical of everything whether people agree with them or not. Miserable people will always voice their opinion before everyone else. They will criticize something that someone loves just to make sure their point is heard. They love to antagonize and truly believe they are always right while everyone else is always wrong.

They worry too much

Worry makes people miserable, so a highly miserable person will make sure to do plenty of that! They won’t listen to reasons and will be obsessed with situations and things they have no control over. Worrying feeds into their misery so it’s only natural that these types of people are worrisome by nature.

They are envious of other people’s success

Miserable people won’t outright say they are envious of other people’s successes, what they will do however, is to put down other people’s achievements and successes by pointing out the negatives or downplaying the news so the other person’s excitement is immediately deflated. When someone is happy, a highly miserable person will make sure to point out all that could possibly go wrong in great detail!

If you feel as though you have some or all the traits of a highly miserable person, now is the time to change some of these habits so you can be a happier, cheerful and more successful person.

Featured photo credit: Fickr Miserable Soul – Mr.C90 via flickr.com

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Last Updated on November 5, 2018

8 Powerful Reasons to Love Your Enemies

8 Powerful Reasons to Love Your Enemies

We’ve all got our enemies; people who take pleasure in causing us pain and misery. Sometimes, the development of an enemy is due to certain differences in your characters and events have led to that. Other times, some people end up hating you for apparently no reason at all.

Regardless of how you got this enemy, as opposed to the paradigm of fighting fire with fire, consider the following reasons and see why you should actually appreciate your enemies. This article will show you not only how to not be bothered by your enemies, but how to actually foster love for them.

Read on to learn the secret.

1. It’s a practical lesson in anger management

To be honest, your enemies are the best people to help you understand your sense of anger management. When it might be true that your enemies have a way of bringing out the worst in you as regards anger, it is also true that they can help you in your quest to have that anger managed. You can’t get truly angry at someone you love and it is only in that time when you get truly annoyed that you learn how to manage it.

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Anger management is more effective when it is in practice and not in theory

Your enemies are like the therapists who you need, but actually don’t want. Inasmuch as you might want to hate them, they provide you an opportunity to control the anger impulse that you have.

2. It’s an opportunity for healthy competition

You might not know it, but your enemies make for great rivals as they help harness the competitor in you (sometimes, you might not even know or bee conversant with this competitive side until you come across an adversary). You get the right motivation to compete and this can go a long way to spur you to victory.

However, while doing so, it is also essential that you remember not to become a worse version of yourself while competing. Working against an adversary is tricky, and you need to ensure that you don’t cause harm to yourself or your morals in the process. Healthy competition is all you need to get out of this.

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3. Their negative comments can help you make a breakthrough

It is true that your enemies never really have much good to say about you. However, in as much as they might be talking out of a place of hate, there might be some truth to what they’re saying.

To wit, whenever you hear something mean or nasty from an enemy, you might want to take a step back and evaluate yourself. There is a chance that what this enemy is saying is true and coming to face that fact is a major step in helping you to become a better person overall. This is another testament to the fact that enemies can be therapists in their own way.

4. Enemies can also be powerful allies

Loving your enemies can also mean making an effort to interact and make peace with them. In the end, if you are able to establish some common ground and patch things up, you’ll have succeeded in making another friend. And who doesn’t need friends?

This can also help you in working with people in the long run. You get to hone your inter-personal skills, and that can be a big plus to your ledger.

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5. It gives you the ability to realize positivity

In a multitude of negativity, a speck of positivity always seems to find its way through.

Sometimes, a knowledge of the fact that you have enemies will also help you to focus on the many positives and good things that are in your life. A lot of times, we neglect what really matters in life. This can be due to being overly concerned with the enemies we have.

However, it is also possible for this acknowledgement to spur you to take a step back and appreciate the goo things (and people who surround you).

6. There might just be a misunderstanding

Sometimes, the reason why you have an enemy might be something very innocuous. You might not have known the cause of this fractured relationship and your enemy will help complete the picture.

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Simply approaching them will help you to understand the reason for the fracture. This, in turn, can help you to work towards healing your relationship moving forward. Misunderstandings happen, and you need to be able to work around them.

7. You learn to appreciate love as well

A constant reminder of the fact that there are enemies will also help you not to take those who love you for granted. Love and hate are two opposing emotions and it is possible for one to momentarily overshadow the other.

However, while you’ll always have enemies, there will also always be people who love you. These people need to be appreciated for what they do for you. Never let the hate projected to you from your enemies take the place of that.

8. Do you really need the hate?

The truth is that enemies bring only toxic emotions and generate bad reactions from you. If you’re truly to live a prosperous life, you can’t really be carrying all this baggage around.

Hate is bad and you should try all you can to get rid of it. It is a well-known fact that nobody can get really far in life while carrying a lot of emotional baggage. Well, hate is the biggest form of emotional baggage there is.

Featured photo credit: rawpixel via unsplash.com

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