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15 Bitters and Sweets Only People Living Alone Will Understand

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15 Bitters and Sweets Only People Living Alone Will Understand

Living alone may no longer be such a great aberration. As a woman in her forties who lives alone, I was ecstatic to discover this good news. There are delightful upsides to living alone, although there can be downsides, as well. But what relationship doesn’t have its ups and downs? The difference for singles is that ‘we’ have no one but ourselves to blame when something goes wrong!

1. You can leave the toilet lid down (or up)

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    Ladies will especially love this one. No more stumbling to the toilet in the middle of the night only to dip your cheeks into toilet water. Or get that unearthly feeling of falling into the toilet! This fear completely disappears when living alone.

    For guys, now you have the convenience of putting that lid down only when you need to!

    2. You have to pay for everything yourself

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      Certainly, it is better to have two incomes to pay for the bills, rather than one. And those of us who choose to be single are indeed responsible for the entirety of the bills. On the upside, for the ladies there may be a break when or if a gentleman takes you out. It’s always polite to pay halfsies at least, of course, but a true gentleman is always prepared to foot the bill (sorry guys).

      But all the rest of the bills that come down the pike are yours and yours alone.

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      3. You only have yourself to argue with

      There’s just no one else to blame if the dishes go undone, or the laundry, or anything else for that matter. Most singles would argue that this is on the plus side of living alone. You get to be as messy or as neat as you choose to be and there is no one around to tell you otherwise.

      4. You have to carry in your own groceries

      When living alone there’s no one else to carry out the shopping duties but you. In so doing, you are inherently responsible for carrying in said groceries. That could mean trudging back and forth all on your lonesome. It also means you get to choose exactly the menu for the coming week. And there is the upside that there’s no one else around to decide what or when to eat. The downside is that fresh veggies sometimes do go to waste as there is only one of you to go around.

      5. No one else has to put up with your morning breath

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        As a single only you are required to wake up to that foul, sticky taste in your mouth. You get to arise and take a good, long stretch, and there is no reason to go rushing into the bathroom to brush your teeth (unless of course, you have invited over some company). You are also not required to grin and bear through a hangover or headache for anyone the morning after partying. If you don’t want breakfast, skip it! After all you’re the only one to blame for a lack of getting breakfast.

        6. You can do what you want, when you want

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          Have an itch in a private place? For that matter, need to fart? Burp? Just need a quiet moment to blow your nose (or pick it)? Go ahead, you live alone and no one’s there to bother you about it. Now the downside here could be that you’re sick (as in physically ill). In that case, there’s no one around to take care of you but you. And well, yeah, that does kinda suck. Otherwise, when in the company of yourself, be as gross or as disgusting as you’d like!

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          7. You can leave the bed unmade or made

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            In other words, the decision is yours and yours alone to make. As a single, your bed can stay unmade for days, even weeks. Fitted sheet come undone? That’s OK, a single can sleep on the bare mattress … this single thing is all about you. Some call this insufferably selfish. ‘We’ singles say it is unconscionable freedom … and singles like it that way.

             8. You get to choose how you want to relax

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              Sick of watching TV? Turn it off and go read a book. Take a nice, long walk. There’s no one to stop you. Want to stay out all night? Go ahead, no one’s waiting up for you, remember? Want to go out and eat? See a flick? The choices are virtually endless. Except maybe when it comes to going out with friends … after all, they might have someone they need permission from before heading out on the town!

              9. You never have to worry about asking your roommate if it’s OK for someone to come over
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                You live alone. The only excuse you might have for not wanting someone to come over is the condition of the place. You may not be the world’s best housekeeper, so you find yourself querying your date. Does he or she mind the mess? Are you willing for him or her to wade through the mess to the bedroom? The choice, as per usual, is yours and only yours to make.

                10. You know that living alone does not exclude you from great relationships

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                  Yeah, everything really is up to you. The difference being your significant other has their own place. So, what’s not to like? You get to tell even him or her that time’s up and it’s time to go. No more clingy relationships for you. Just sheer freedom and attachments only when you want them.

                   11. You never have to come home to a drunk roommate

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                    No more helping anyone else but yourself to bed. No more listening to those unfathomable sounds from the bathroom either.The only drunk person you have to deal with is yourself. Maybe you’re the type who feels the need to comfort someone else while they sick up a night’s worth of beer and heaven knows what else. None of that is for the person who has decided to live alone.

                    12. You don’t have to leave an “Occupied” sign on the doorknob

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                      In other words, you can just let a romance bloom any way you want. Want to bring that super nice guy to your apartment? Or some nice chick? You are under no obligation to call or leave a secret sign to anyone else that you need your time with someone else.

                      13. You can leave your laundry where you dropped it

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                        Sure, the fact remains that you’ll have to wash your laundry eventually. But what’s the hurry? Shrug it off wherever you are in the apartment and simply leave it lying around. After all, there’s no one else who has to look at it or even acknowledge it exists. Cleaning day does eventually come. But singles know that ‘eventually’ doesn’t come until they’re good and ready to conquer it.

                        14. The bathroom’s all yours

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                          No more waiting until the roommate gets out of the bathroom. Or dancing on one foot trying to patiently wait to pee. The shower is always open. You don’t have to rush putting on makeup or drying your hair. The bathroom’s yours and yours alone.

                          15. The stuff you buy is all yours

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                            Ever felt peckish around midnight only to find a roommate had eaten your last yogurt? No more sharing food, or anything else for that matter. What you buy is yours, completely your responsibility. You can arrange and rearrange as you please.

                            Featured photo credit: Wikipedia Commons via commons.wikimedia.org

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                            Last Updated on January 5, 2022

                            How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

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                            How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

                            We all lose our temper from time to time, and expressing anger is actually a healthy thing to do in our relationships with others. Expressing our differences in opinion allows us to have healthy conflict and many times come to an agreement or understanding that works for everyone. However, there are times when anger can become overwhelming or damaging, and during these times, it’s important to learn how to deal with anger.

                            Expressing anger inappropriately can be harmful to relationships, both personal and professional. You may express too much anger, too often, or at times that are only going to make things worse, not better. In this article we will look at anger management techniques that will help you better control your emotions.

                            Let’s take a deeper look at how to deal with anger.

                            Expressing Anger

                            Anger is a natural and normal part of almost any relationship. This includes relationships with your significant other, kids, boss, friends, family, etc. Anger provides us with valuable information if we are willing to listen to it. It clues us in to areas where we disagree with others and things that need to be changed or altered.

                            Unhealthy Ways to Express Anger

                            Here are some common yet unhealthy ways to express anger that you should avoid:

                            Being Passive-Aggressive

                            This is a term many of us are familiar with. Passive-aggressive behavior happens when someone is angry but uses indirect communication to express their anger.

                            Some of the more common passive-aggressive behaviors include the silent treatment, making comments about someone behind their back, being grumpy, moody, or pouting, or simply not doing tasks or assignments that they should.

                            This is a passive-aggressive person’s way of showing their anger. It’s not very productive but extremely common.

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                            Poorly-Timed

                            Some people get overwhelmed and express anger in a situation where it can’t really do any good.

                            An example would be getting angry at one person in front of a crowd of people. All that does is make people uncomfortable and shuts them down. It’s not a healthy way to express anger or disagreement with someone.

                            Ongoing Anger

                            Being angry all the time is most often a symptom of something else. It’s healthy and normal to express anger when you disagree with someone. However, if someone is angry most of the time and always seems to be expressing their anger to everyone around them, this won’t serve them well.

                            Over time, people will start to avoid this person and have as little contact as possible. The reason being is no one likes being around someone who is angry all the time; it’s a no-win situation.

                            Healthy Ways to Express Anger

                            What about the healthy ways[1] to adapt? When learning how to deal with anger, here are some healthy ways to get you started.

                            Being Honest

                            Express your anger or disagreement honestly. Be truthful about what it is that is making you angry. Sometimes this will entail walking away and thinking about it for a bit before you respond.

                            Don’t say you’re mad at something someone did or said when it’s really something else that upset you.

                            Being Direct

                            Similar to being honest, being direct is a healthy way to express anger.

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                            Don’t talk around something that is making you angry. Don’t say that one thing is making you angry when it’s really something else, and don’t stack items on top of each other so you can unload on someone about 10 different things 6 months from now.

                            Be direct and upfront about what is making you angry. Ensure you are expressing your anger to the person who upset you or you are angry at, not to someone else. This is very counterproductive.

                            Being Timely

                            When something makes you angry, it’s much better to express it in a timely manner. Don’t keep it bottled up inside of you, as that’s only going to do more harm than good.

                            Think of the marriages that seem to go up in flames out of nowhere when the reality is someone kept quiet for years until they hit their breaking point.

                            Expressing anger as it occurs is a much healthier way of using anger to help us guide our relationships in the moment.

                            How to Deal With Anger

                            If you feel angry, how should you deal with it right at that moment?

                            1. Slow Down

                            From time to time, I receive an email at work that makes me so angry that steam is probably pouring out of my ears.

                            In my less restrained moments, I have been known to fire off a quick response, and that typically has ended about as well as you might imagine.

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                            When I actually walk away from my computer and go do something else for a while, I am able to calm down and think more rationally. After that happens, I am able to respond in a more appropriate and productive manner. Doing things that helps you learn how to release anger can make an uncomfortable situation more manageable before it gets out of hand.

                            2. Focus on the “I”

                            Remember that you are the one that’s upset. Don’t accuse people of making you upset because, in the end, it’s your response to what someone did that really triggered your anger. You don’t want to place blame by saying something like “Why don’t you ever put away your dishes?” Say something more like “Having dirty dishes laying on the counter upsets me—can you work with me to come to a solution?”

                            When you are accusatory towards someone, all that does is increase the tension. This doesn’t usually do anything except make your anger rise higher.

                            3. Work out

                            When learning how to deal with anger, exercise is a great outlet. If something happens that angers you, see if you have the opportunity to burn off some of the anger.

                            Being able to hit the gym to get a hard workout in is great. If this isn’t an option, see if you can go for a run or a bike ride. If you are at work when you become angry and the weather permits, at least go outside for a brisk walk.

                            Besides working some of your anger out through exercise, this also helps to give your mind a chance to work through some ways to address what it is that upset you.

                            4. Seek Help When Needed

                            There are times when we could all use some help. Life can be stressful and overwhelming. It’s perfectly fine to seek some help from a mental health professional if it will help you get back to a healthy balance.If you find that you are angry all the time, it might be a good idea to go talk to an expert about learning to control intense emotions. They can give you some sound advice and ideas on how to get your anger to a more manageable and healthy level.

                            5. Practice Relaxation

                            We all seem to lead incredibly busy lives, and that’s a good thing if we are loving the life we are living. That being said, it is very beneficial to our physical and mental well-being to take time out for relaxation.

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                            That can mean spending time doing things that help us calm down and relax, like being around people we enjoy, practicing deep breathing or listening to music. It could be making time for things that help bring us balance like a healthy diet and physical activity.

                            Many people incorporate techniques such as yoga and meditation to calm their minds and release tension when learning how to deal with anger. Whatever your choice is, ensure you take time out to relax when warning signs of anger start to bubble up.

                            6. Laugh

                            Incorporating humor and laughter on a regular basis will help keep anger in check and help you get over a bad mood and feelings of anger more quickly. This isn’t part of formal anger management techniques, but you’ll be surprised by how well it works. Remember, life is a journey that’s meant to be enjoyed fully along the way through healthy emotion. Make sure you take time to laugh and have fun.Surround yourself with people that like to laugh and enjoy life. Don’t work at a job that just causes you stress, which can lead to anger. Work at something you enjoy doing.

                            7. Be Grateful

                            It’s easy to focus on the bad in life and the things that cause us negative emotions. It’s vitally important to remind ourselves of all the wonderful things in life that bring us positive emotions, things that we easily forget because we get caught up in the whirlwind of day to day life.

                            Take time out each day to remind yourself of a few things you are grateful for in order to help you learn how to release anger and invite in more positive feelings.

                            Final Thoughts

                            Life can be overwhelming at times. We seem to have constant pressure to achieve more and to always be on the go or motivated. People we are around and situations we are in can cause stress, anger, and negative emotions. At times, it can seem to be too much, and we get angry and our emotions start to get out of control.

                            During these times, keep in mind that life is an incredible journey, full of wonder and things that bring you joy. When you find yourself angry more often than is healthy, take time out to remember the good things in life—the things that we seem to forget yet bring us so much positive energy and emotions.

                            Use some of the tips included here to help with how to deal with anger and better control your emotions.

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                            Featured photo credit: Andre Hunter via unsplash.com

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