Advertising
Advertising

12 Things Truly Mature Men Don’t Do

12 Things Truly Mature Men Don’t Do

When men get to a certain age, they start to leave their old life behind in favour for one with fewer hangovers and more responsibilities. This all happens when men start to mature and in return for this maturity they begin to see life in a different way. Less stress and more results. Being more mature can help with moving up the career ladder or settling down with a beautiful woman. Read down our list to see if you have, like a good piece of steak, matured well.

1. They don’t go out on a school night.

When we’re young we tend not to worry about the consequences of coming into work with a hangover or just not turning up at all. When men become more mature they remember that it’s their job that allows them to pay for all the fun things in life. It’s important to turn up to work with a clear head and to make sure they’re working to their best ability as this can lead to a promotion, which can’t be a bad thing! Mature men don’t forget to have fun, though; they just remember that’s what days off are for!

2. They don’t see their partners as secondary to their friends.

It’s often said that men sometimes put their friends before their partner. There’s a whole culture surrounding men who want to “get away from the ball and chain” and have to ask permission to have a few pints. Mature men realize that their partner is a possible life companion so they deserve to be a priority. They aren’t ashamed to spend less time with “the lads” in favor of a quiet night in with their other half. Significant others are supposed to be best friends as well as lovers, so mature men begin to realize that and stop making them feel inadequate.

Advertising

3. They don’t put off seeing their moms.

Many of us resent having to go and see the family because we’d rather watch Netflix all day. A mature man remembers that his family isn’t going to be there forever and that it’s important to spend time with those who cared for him when he was young. Not only does he understand the importance of seeing family, but he actually wants to do it because he’s gotten over seeing it as a chore.

4. They don’t try to please others.

Men always want to please their friends. They’ll go out when they can’t afford it because they don’t want to be “that guy”. When men get older and more mature, they know that it’s more important to please yourself first because in all honesty, no one will even notice that you’re not there. Mature men know when it’s a good time to socialize and when it’s best to save the pennies.

5. They don’t meet confrontation with anger.

Young men are often noted for their violent nature. Not all men, of course, but when men get angry, they often use violence to solve it. Mature men realize that violence and anger don’t solve problems. They realize that there are repercussions when they become angry and that it’s best to avoid these for the future. Words are way more effective.

Advertising

6. They don’t run away from difficult situations.

When men are younger, they tend to see difficult situations as a reason to run away. The fight-or-flight instinct starts to flare up and more often than not, when things aren’t going well some men don’t stay and fight. When men have become more mature they realize that life isn’t always perfect and it’s important to deal with these situations, as they make us stronger. Mature men will fight head on and make sure that there are no leftover issues that could come up later in life.

7. They don’t shy away from their responsibilities.

Similarly, when men grow older, the amount of responsibilities they have increases. Men who are mature embrace these responsibilities and take ownership of them. Instead of pretending they don’t exist, a mature man will ensure that he is on top of everything he needs to do, knowing that he won’t be able to enjoy his leisure time without having done so.

8. They don’t live for the weekend.

We all enjoy having some time off from work but mature men know that wishing your life away is, well, just that, wishing it away. Instead, mature men like to enjoy everyday and fill up their weeks with not only things they have to do, but things they want to do.

Advertising

9. They don’t have a big group of friends.

Young men always have that group of “lads” that they do everything with. When men start to mature, they begin to stay in on a Friday night, favoring a takeaway and a beer rather than a night on the lash. This usually means that some friends are lost and replaced with a few great friends that don’t rely on you to come out every Saturday night to sustain your friendship. It’s not bad to prefer a few close friends to a group of friends who can sometimes be unreliable.

10. They aren’t afraid to be weak in front of their partners.

Men are known for not being in touch with their emotions and this tends to drive women crazy. When a man has become more mature he isn’t afraid of being judged for showing his sensitive side because he knows that it’s more healthy to show his emotions than to suppress them. He also knows that showing weakness to his partner ensures that they grow closer to each other and end up sustaining a much longer and healthier relationship.

11. They don’t get scared by the possibility of starting their own family.

Not everyone wants to have children and start a family but men who have matured aren’t running for the rooftops when they hear about all their friends having children. In fact they actually get a little broody and coo when they see little baby booties. A man who wants children will be excited by the prospect of having a mini me running around his ankles. It’s important to never push a man (or anyone!) to do something he doesn’t want to do, but when he’s ready, you’ll know.

Advertising

12. They don’t live in the moment.

When we’re young we’re taught to live for the moment and don’t worry about what tomorrow might bring. YOLO if you like, but when men begin to mature they realize that being reckless isn’t the best way to live. Of course it’s important to enjoy life and take every experience offered. But it’s not going to pay the bills. Mature men realize this and ensure that they take the future into consideration when they start to make plans.

More by this author

15 Things Only People Who Do Shift Work Will Understand 20 Quotes That May Make You Less Angry This Is Why Finding The Right Spouse Is The Key To Your Career Success An Amazing Way To Put On Eyeliner Using Eyelash Curler 12 Things Truly Mature Men Don’t Do

Trending in Communication

1 12 Simple Ways to Boost Your Confidence Right Now 2 How to Use the 5 Minute Journal to Invest in Your Happiness 3 What’s the Purpose of Life? A Guide to Live with Meaning 4 Why Happiness is a Choice (And a Smart One to Make) 5 How to Survive a Midlife Crisis (The Definitive Guide for Men)

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on January 16, 2020

12 Simple Ways to Boost Your Confidence Right Now

12 Simple Ways to Boost Your Confidence Right Now

The way you feel about yourself greatly influences how you live and interact with others. If you are confident about yourself, you tend to see yourself positively and actually enjoy spending time with and around people. You don’t feel self-conscious or awkward around others, and that allows you to live your fullest and happiest life.

However, if you’re drowning in a sea of self-doubt, hesitancy and shyness, you often withdraw and isolate yourself from others and avoid interacting and connecting with people. That anxiety you feel in the pit of your stomach when you are around people is holding you back greatly and it is not good for your emotional health and overall well-being. You need to do something about it if you are low in self-confidence or have friends or family members who are not confident.

“Confidence isn’t walking into a room thinking you’re better than everyone, it’s walking in not having to compare yourself to anyone” – Anonymous

Here are simple, practical tips to boost your confidence right now and make you feel and act your best.

1. Stop labeling yourself as awkward, timid or shy.

When you label yourself as awkward, timid or shy, you sub-consciously tell your mind to act accordingly and psychologically feel inclined to live up to those expectations. Instead of labeling and entertaining negative self-talk, visualize and affirm yourself as confident and strong. Close your eyes for a minute and visualize yourself in different situation as you would like to be.

Be your own cheerleader. Experts believe that positive affirmation and good mental practices like picturing yourself winning or achieving a goal can lead to greater feelings of self-assurance and prepare your brain for success.[1] As the saying goes, “seeing is believing.” Picture yourself as confident and soon enough you will begin to manifest behavior that gives evidence to this new ‘fact.’

2. Recognize that the world is not focused on you (unless, of course, you are Kanye West).

That means you don’t have to be excessively sensitive about who you are or what you are doing (or not doing). You are not on the center stage; there is no need for preoccupation with self and perfectionism. As rap music star Rocko sings, “You just do you and I will do me, aight?”

Advertising

Forget about trying to please everyone or being perfect. Trying to be perfect and being a people-pleaser puts too much pressure on you and creates unnecessary anxiety. Besides, people are too preoccupied with their own issues to pay much attention to your every move unless, of course, you are a mega famous, super celebrity like Beyonce or Kanye West.

3. Focus on other people as opposed to yourself.

If you are low on confidence, self-conscious, nervous and shy in social situations, focus your attention on other people and what they are saying or doing instead of focusing on your own awkwardness.

For example, think about what it is that is interesting about the person who’s the centre of the party or the guy or girl you are talking with. Prompt them to talk more about themselves and be genuinely curious and interested in what they say. You will instantly come across as confident and warmhearted.

People generally want to talk about themselves, be heard and understood. They will love it when you’re eager and willing to listen to them and really hear what they have to say.

This habit of focusing more on what you love in others as opposed to what you dislike in yourself will not only help you become more assertive and comfortable in virtually all social situations, but also instantly make you feel great about yourself.

4. Know (and accept) yourself for who you are.

Chinese military general, strategist and philosopher Sun Tzu, author of the internationally acclaimed book The Art of War, said, “Know yourself and you will win all battles.” Even in the battle with lack of confidence, you will need to know yourself to win.

Knowing yourself starts with understanding that people are not all the same, neither are all social situation suitable for everyone. You might not be confident in large gatherings, but you could be bold and confident in one-on-one and small group interactions. We all have our own unique gifts and unique ways of expressing ourselves. Embrace yours!

Advertising

Introverts, for example, have a quiet confidence that is, unfortunately, often confused for shyness. They are naturally low key and prefer to spend time alone. However, this natural disposition affords them certain unique gifts, such as an ability to listen better than most people and notice things that others don’t.

Your uniqueness is where your strength and advantage lies. You won’t be comfortable and confident in all situations all the time. Albert Einstein said,

“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.”

5. Crack a smile.

If there is one sure way to instantly boost your confidence, it’s cracking a smile. Christine Clapp, a public speaking expert at The George Washington University, says that flashing those pretty, pearly white teeth will immediately make you appear both confident and composed. But, the effect of smiling is not just external. Studies show that smiling can also help nix feelings of stress and pave the way for a happier and more relaxed you.[2]

Not a bad return for something seemingly so trite, wouldn’t you agree?

6. Break a sweat—with exercise.

Working out is another great way to make yourself feel amazing and confident. Science has shown that exercising increases your endorphins, helps reduce stress, tones your muscles and makes you feel happy and confident.[3]

And hey, all you have to do is take a walk a few times a week and you’ll see the benefits. What seems to matter—as far as your confidence goes—is whether you break a sweat, not how strenuous your session is, which is pretty cool. Start working out now.

Advertising

7. Groom yourself.

This might seem mundane, but it’s amazing how much of a difference a shower and shave can have on your confidence and self-image. And when you spritz on a scent, the boost on confidence and self-esteem is incredible. As it turns out, your favorite fragrance does more than make you smell oh-so-nice.

A study found that a fragrance can inspire confidence in men. Interestingly, the study also found that the more a man likes the fragrance, the more confident he might feel. Another study found that 90% of women feel more confident while wearing a scent than those who go fragrance-free.

8. Dress nicely.

Another one that might seem trite, but it works. If you dress nicely, you’ll instantly feel good about yourself and give your confidence a real boost. That is largely because you’ll feel attractive, presentable and sometimes even successful in nice clothes.

While dressing nicely means something different for everyone, it does not necessarily mean wearing $500 designer outfits. It means wearing clothes that are clean, that you are comfortable in and that are nice-looking and presentable, including casual clothes.

9. Do activities you enjoy.

Whether it is reading a book, playing a musical instrument, riding your bicycle or going fishing, do what you really enjoy and what makes you truly happy often. It will boost your self-esteem, soothe your ego and allow you to identify with your gifts and talents. That will in turn bolster your self-belief and grow your confidence exponentially.

You might not become popular for doing what you love, but you might not even want to be popular at all. Being popular doesn’t make you happy; doing what you love does.

10. Prepare for the possibility of rejection / setback.

Late World No. 1 professional tennis player Arthur Ashe said, “One important key to success is self-confidence. A key to self-confidence is preparation.” You need to prepare for the possibility of rejection and setback.

Advertising

Why?

Everybody suffers rejection and setback at one point or another. You are not exempted. The question on your mind, therefore, should not be if you will be rejected, but how you will handle rejection when it comes.

Prepare yourself adequately in every situation to minimize the risk and effect of rejection and so that your confidence is not broken. For example, learn public speaking and rehearse what you are going to say beforehand if you have landed a public speaking engagement. That way, you are sure of yourself and confident you have what it takes to hack it. If you are rejected, don’t take it personally.

Rejection and setbacks happen to the best of us. Take it as a learning experience. Learn from your mistakes and move on.

11. Face uncomfortable situations square in the face.

Don’t run away from uncomfortable situations. Running away from people or situations because you feel scared, shy or timid only confirms and reinforces your shyness. Instead, face the situation that makes you uneasy square in the face. For example, go ahead and talk to that person you are afraid to approach, or go straight to the front of your yoga class! What’s the worst that can happen?

Prepare and be ready for any eventuality. The more you face your fears, the more you realize you are stronger than you thought and the more confident you get. This simple, yet admittedly courageous, act makes you unstoppable. You get comfortable being uncomfortable and begin to feel like you can take on the world. And that is the hallmark of someone destined for great things.

12. Sit up straight and walk tall—you are awesome!

Yes, sit up straight and believe you are awesome. Don’t slump in your chair or slouch your shoulders. Experts say the right stance can not only keep your self-esteem and mood lifted, but also lead to more confidence in your own thoughts.[4]

The way to sit is to open up your chest and keep your head level so that you look and feel poised and assured. And when you get up, stand tall and walk like you’re on a mission. People who sit up straight and walk tall are more attractive and instantly feel more confident. Try it now: you’ll feel fierce and confident just by sitting up straight and walking tall.

Featured photo credit: Freshh Connection via unsplash.com

Reference

Read Next