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12 Things Highly Confident People Don’t Do

12 Things Highly Confident People Don’t Do

I think some people confuse self-confidence with having a big ego. It’s almost like they think that if they love themselves, then other people will think that they are stuck-up and unlikable. I couldn’t disagree more. I always say that truly confident people don’t need to go around telling people how great they are because they don’t need to. People automatically notice their greatness from their positive behavior. Here are things that highly confident people just don’t do:

1. They don’t judge or make fun of other people.

When someone is confident, they want you to be confident too. Confident people are loving people. They want to lift you up, not tear you down.

2. They don’t seek attention for the sake of attention.

They may have an outgoing, life-of-the-party personality, or they might be quiet and shy. But even if an extrovert has high self-confidence, they don’t need the attention. They are fine if they receive it, but they don’t go actively seeking outside validation because they have already validated themselves. And that’s all they need.

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3. They don’t brag about their accomplishments.

Confident people are proud of their accomplishments. And they truly want to help people. But they do the things they do because they have passion for it. They don’t have a “Look at me! Look how awesome I am!” attitude.

4. They don’t spread negative energy.

People want to be around them. They ooze positive energy. Contrary to the “energy vampires” of the world who do nothing but suck the life out of you, confident people add to you; they don’t take away.

5. They don’t only talk about themselves.

Confident people are genuinely concerned about others, not just themselves. They ask questions. They offer suggestion and advice if they are asked. They make conversations and relationships a two-way street.

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6. They don’t over-complicate things.

They don’t make mountains out of mole hills. Confident people try to act calmly and rationally for the best of all concerned. Sometimes that includes simplifying things so that problems can be solved with a “team” mentality, not a “me vs. you” mentality.

7. They don’t focus on what they don’t want.

If you only focus on what you don’t want, you’re only going to get more of what you don’t want. Confident people know that. They look at the bright side and have a grateful heart. They set goals, hold up a positive vision of their desire, and then they take action and go after it.

8. They don’t act full of themselves.

Confident people never project an attitude. Instead, they project kindness and warmth. They smile and laugh. They want you to feel good about yourself, instead of telling you how great they are.

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9. They don’t break their word.

When someone breaks their word, it disappoints other people. Confident people know this. They don’t want other people to feel bad. Their intention is to lift up other people, so they make sure they do everything they can to do what they say they are going to do.

10. They don’t shy away from failure.

Highly confident people know that there really is no such thing as failure. There are only learning opportunities. And when the failures, or learning opportunities, come along, they know that they will be better for it. They don’t judge themselves negatively. They simply say, “thank you for the lesson” and move on.

11. They don’t waste time on things that don’t matter.

Confident people know what really matters in life. People matter. They prioritize time to spend with loved ones because it’s what life is all about. They also don’t sweat the small things. They put things into perspective and have an appreciation for everything.

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12. They don’t focus on the negative.

Generally speaking, confident people are optimists. They are happy. They look at what is good, not what is bad. They focus on what can go right, not what can go wrong. They don’t dwell in negativity. Instead, they see the positives in every situation.

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Carol Morgan

Dr. Carol Morgan is the owner of HerSideHisSide.com, a communication professor, dating & relationship coach, TV personality, speaker, and author.

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Last Updated on October 17, 2019

How to Spend More Quality Time with Your Partner

How to Spend More Quality Time with Your Partner

You see your partner every single day. They are the first person you talk to in the morning and the last person you kiss goodnight.

But does seeing each other day in and day out equal a healthy relationship? Not necessarily.

Spending quality time with your partner is the best way to ensure your relationship stays healthy and strong. This means going above and beyond sitting together while you watch Netflix or going out for the occasional dinner. You deserve more from your relationship – and so does your spouse!

What does quality time mean? It means spending time with your spouse without interruption. It’s a chance for you to come together and talk. Communication will build emotional intimacy and trust.

Quality time is also about expressing love in a physical way. Not sex, necessarily (but that’s great, too!) but through hand-holding, cuddling, caressing, and tickling. Studies show that these displays of affection will boost partner satisfaction.[1]

So how do you spend quality time with your partner? Here are 13 relationship tips on making the most out of your time with your partner.

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1. Recognize the Signs

If you want a healthy relationship, you have to learn how to recognize the signs that you need to spend more quality time together.

Some telltale signs include:

  • You’re always on your phones.
  • You value friendships or hobbies over quality time with your spouse.
  • You aren’t together during important events.
  • You are arguing more often or lack connection.
  • You don’t make plans or date nights.
  • You’re not happy.

If you are experiencing any of these relationship symptoms, know that quality time together can reverse the negative effects of the signs above.

2. Try New Things Together

Have you ever wanted to learn how to play an instrument or speak another language? How about skydive or ballroom dance?

Instead of viewing these as solo hobbies and interests, why not involve your partner?

Trying new activities together builds healthy relationships because it encourages spouses to rely on one another for emotional and physical support.

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Shared hobbies also promote marital friendship, and the Journal of Happiness Studies found that marital satisfaction was twice as high for couples who viewed each other as best friends.[2]

3. Schedule in Tech-Free Time

Your phone is a great way to listen to music, watch videos, and keep up-to-date with friends and family. But is your phone good for your relationship?

Many couples phone snub, or ‘phub’, one another. Studies show that phubbing can lower relationship satisfaction and increase one’s chances of depression.[3]

Reduce those chances by removing distractions when spending quality time together and showing your partner they have your full attention.

4. Hit the Gym as a Couple

One way you can spend more time together as a couple is by becoming workout partners. Studies show that couples are more likely to stay with their exercise routine if they work out together.[4] Couples also work out harder than they would solo. One study found that 95 percent of couples who work out together maintained weight loss compares to the 66 percent of singles who did.[5]

Join a gym, do at-home couples’ workouts, try couples yoga, hit the hiking trails, or get your bikes out. No matter which way you choose to exercise, these healthy activities can promote a healthy relationship.

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5. Cook Meals Together

Pop open a bottle of wine or put some romantic music on while you get busy – in the kitchen, of course!

One of the best relationship tips for spending quality time together when you both have busy schedules is to cook meals together.[6]

Spice things up and try and prepare a four-course meal or a fancy French dish together. Not only is this a fun way to spend your time together, but it also promotes teamwork.

If all goes well, you’ll have a romantic date night meal at home that you prepared with your four hands. And if the food didn’t turn out the way you’d hoped, you are guaranteed to have a laugh and create new memories together.

6. Have a Regular Date Night

Couples experience a greater sense of happiness and less stress when they are spending quality time together.[7] One of the biggest relationship tips for a healthy partnership is to include a date night in your weekly routine.

The National Marriage Project found that having a weekly date night can make your relationship seem more exciting and helps prevent relationship boredom.[8] It also lowers the probability of divorce, improves your sex life, and increases healthy communication.

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Some great ideas for what to do on your date night include:

  • Have a movie marathon – Gather up your favorite flicks and cuddle up on the couch.
  • Play games together – Cards, board games, video games, and other creative outlets are a fun way to spend quality time together.
  • Recreate your first date – Go back to that restaurant and order the same meal you did when you first got together. You can spice up your evening by pretending you’re strangers meeting for the first time and see how sexy the night gets.
  • Plan a weekend getaway – There’s nothing better than traveling with the one you love.
  • Dinner and a movie – A classic!
  • Try a new restaurant – Make it your mission to rate and try all of the Mexican restaurants/Irish pubs/Italian trattorias in your area.
  • Have a long sex session – Intimacy promotes the release of the oxytocin hormone which is responsible for a myriad of great feelings.[9]

Here’re even more date night ideas for your reference: 50 Unique and Really Fun Date Ideas for Couples

Final Thoughts

The benefits of spending quality time together are endless. Here are just some of the ways it can contribute to a healthy relationship:

  • Improves emotional and physical intimacy
  • Lowers divorce rates
  • Improves communication
  • Reduces marital boredom
  • Bonds couples closer
  • Improves friendship
  • Boosts health
  • Reduces stress

These are all excellent reasons to start making date night a regular part of your week.

It’s easy to have a healthy relationship when you set aside dedicated time to share with your spouse. Try new things together, make your spouse your workout buddy, and look for innovative ways to be close and connected.

These relationship tips will bring great benefits to your marriage.

Featured photo credit: Allen Taylor via unsplash.com

Reference

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