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11 Life Lessons That College Won’t Teach You

11 Life Lessons That College Won’t Teach You

College life is something that teaches us many things. It tells us how irritating and annoying can people be in the beginning; yet at the end these people are the ones whom we call our best buddies. The most amazing part is that the college life allows us to define our selves. We choose our ideologies and perceptions about life. We experience first time freedom to develop and define our own unique existence.

The endless teasings, the first crush, the first group of best buddies, the first hangover, the first night out, the best enemies, the bunks, the professor’s questions, and much more: college life teaches us many things.

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    With so many memories and lessons learned, it could be surprising that there are a few things that were missed. Here are 11 life lessons that you won’t learn from years at the university.

    1. The courses and classes can’t be used much.

    The guy who sits next to you in the office may not have taken the same course that you did. The two of you may belong to different academic backgrounds, still you both earn the same respect and money. No one asks you what you learned in college, but you have to learn things on your own and finish the task which your boss “assumes” that you learned in college. College is over and now life is beyond the lectures and textbooks.

    2. In life, skills matter.

    The person who supervises you might just be younger than you. However, you will call him “sir”. In college a junior, who may be elder to you, respected you because you were senior. That was college, where respect was given. In real life, respect is earned.

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    3. The art of communicating.

    You may had escaped the Personality Development classes in college but in life you realize the importance of communicating well. You might need to propose a girl, you have to ask for a salary hike, or you may want to discuss issues with your neighbors. Communication skills are something which can make or break you.

    4. How to judge people correctly.

    In college a person is your friend or foe, but in life you just can’t guess what relationship you share. A “somebody” at office may proof to be a “nobody” at the time of need. A good friend at the office may cut off your chance of promotion because he has to make his own way. So you have to learn how to identify the traits of people around you. Actions may contradict the words.

    Young business man thinking with colleagues at the back

      5. You check yourself: what you say, how you say and to whom you say.

      In college you could abuse and fight with your batch mates on one day and the other day you found yourself busy with the same people because you had to complete an assignment together. But in life it is a different story. In college your friends and the others knew what you mean by your words, but in life people will perceive you as per their perceptions, not as per your words.

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      6. Networking and social connections always help

      In college your friends could be your world. But in life you can’t sustain without networking and social connections. You need a job referral; you need a new house; you need to start a business; you need to start your social activists group. This all means you need good relations with people.

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        7. Saving money isn’t easy.

        The quest to explore life, the thrill of being 100 feet in the sky, the joy of savoring the red wine in a vineyard, the scuba diving experience with the corals and sea creatures. For any of these adventures, you need some savings, which isn’t easy. Your paycheck will always have somewhere else to go–buying food, clothes, paying the bills, visiting your parents. And you’ll notice there won’t always be a lot left over after this.

        8. In relationships, actions speak.

        In college life, a romantic relationship thrived on sweet words. But in real life actions speak. You look at the person; you observe his/her actions and notice how he/she makes you feel. So be careful about the words you use, but also be careful about your actions and gestures.

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        9. Making mistake is fine but it must be a new one each time.

        Each mistake allows you to learn something. It leaves you with a lesson. But to succeed you must make a new mistake each time, so that you always get a new lesson. In college it was okay to ask the same silly question to the same professor again and again, but in life if you ask the same questions or make the same mistake again and again you will labeled as “dumb.”

        10. It is important that you keep marching ahead. Life is a journey, not a destination.

        When you were in school, you only wanted good grades. Once you reached college, you wanted to be famous. When you got your job, your next aim was to get a promotion. After being promoted you wanted a free holiday ticket with family, and so on. Life moves on and on and every moment you have new expectations and aspirations. So just pay attention to the little joys and keep moving ahead.

        11. Everyone is really busy, so you need to take care of yourself.

        Everyone around you is fighting his/her own fight. Even a five-year-old has his own challenges and tasks to do. Everyone is busy thinking about himself, so take care. Yes, you need to love and care for the person whom you see in the mirror because college is over and your friends aren’t there.

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          Last Updated on October 14, 2020

          Had a Bad Day? 7 Ways to Rebound From It and Feel Good Again

          Had a Bad Day? 7 Ways to Rebound From It and Feel Good Again

          Today didn’t turn out as you planned, but it doesn’t mean you’re weak. It simply means that you’re human, and you’re not bad just because you had a bad day.

          “Not everyday is a good day but there is something good in every day.” -Alice Morse Earle

          It’s not the end of the world when you find yourself thinking “I had a bad day,” but it can feel like it. You may have had plans that fell apart, experiences that set you back, and interactions that only did harm.

          You may have started the day thinking you could take on it all, only to find you could hardly get out of bed. When you have a bad day, you can forget to look at the good.

          Sometimes, self-care helps us to remember why we are worth it. It helps us to recharge and reset our mindset. It helps us to know that there are still options and that the day isn’t over yet.

          Love yourself today, no matter how hard it’s been. That’s the way to find yourself amidst the hardships you have. That’s how you center yourself and regain focus and live a more meaningful life. Give yourself some credit and compassion.

          Here are 7 ways to rebound from a bad day using self-compassion as a tool. If you had a bad day, these are for you!

          1. Make a Gratitude List

          In a study on gratitude, psychologists Dr. Robert A Emmons and Dr. Michael E. McCullough conducted an experiment where one group of people wrote out gratitude lists for ten weeks while another group wrote about irritations. The study found that the group that wrote about gratitude reported more optimistic mindsets in their lives[1].

          Overall, having a gratitude list improved well-being and made one truly grateful by counting the blessings in their lives.

          Write a list of what you are grateful for if you had a bad day. Make it as long as you like, but also remember to note why you’re grateful for each thing you write.

          What has given you the most joy? What has set you up for better days? Keep a tally of triumphs in mind, especially when you do have the bad days.

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          The day doesn’t define you, and you still have things of value that surround you. These could be material things, spiritual connections and experiences, relationships, basic needs, emotional and mental well-being, physical health, progress towards hopes and dreams, or simply being alive.

          Here are some other simple ways to practice gratitude.

          2. Write in a Journal

          Journaling affects your overall mental health, which also affects physical health and aids in the management of stress, depression, anxiety, and more[2].

          All you need is a pen and paper, or you could do an online, password-protected journal such as Penzu. The key is to get started and not pressure yourself on how polished or perfect it is. You don’t need to have prior experience to start journal writing. Just start.

          Write out everything that is bothering you for 15 minutes. This helps with rumination, processing problems, and can even aid with brainstorming solutions.

          However you approach it, you can find patterns of thinking that no longer serve you and start to transform your overall mental state. This will impact all areas of your life and is a great coping skill.

          3. Meditate

          Meditation can help you overcome negative thought patterns, worrying about the future, dwelling on the past, or struggling to overcome a bad day[3]. It shifts your mentality and helps you focus on the present or any one thing you truly want to focus on.

          Here is an example of a meditation you can do:

          Get into a comfortable position. Close your eyes. Rest your body, release tension, and unclench your jaw. Tighten and release each muscle group in a body scan for progressive muscle relaxation.

          Focus on your breath, taking a few deep breaths. Let your belly expand when you breathe in for diaphragmatic breathing. Empty yourself completely of air, then return to normal breathing.

          Next, focus on the idea of self-love and let it erase negative thoughts. Think about the ways you’ve been judging yourself, with the narratives coming up that your mind may create.

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          Give yourself unconditional love and release judgment. Take your time meditating on this because you matter. This is particularly important if you had a bad day.

          Check out this article for more on how to get started with a meditation practice.

          4. Do Child’s Pose

          Yoga Outlet says:

          “Child’s Pose is a simple way to calm your mind, slow your breath, and restore a feeling of peace and safety. Practicing the pose before bedtime can help to release the worries of the day. Practicing in the morning can you help transition from sleeping to waking.”[4]

          When you do Child’s Pose, it can be between difficult positions in yoga, or it can be anytime you feel you need a rest. It helps you recover from difficulties and relax the mind.

          It also has the physical health benefits of elongating your back, opening your hips, and helping with digestion[5].

          To do Child’s Pose, rest your buttocks back on your feet, knees on the floor. Elongate your body over your knees with both arms extended or tucked back, with head and neck resting on the floor[6].

          Had a bad day? Try Child's Pose.

             

            Do this pose as a gift to yourself. You are allowing yourself to heal, rest, get time for yourself, recover, and recharge. When you’ve had a bad day, it’s there waiting for you.

            5. Try Positive Self-Talk

            Engage in positive self-talk. This is essentially choosing your thoughts.

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            When you have a negative thought, such as “I can’t do this,” replace it consciously with the thought “I can do this.” Give yourself positive affirmations to help with this.

            Negative self-talk fits into four general categories: personalizing or blaming yourself, magnifying or only focusing on the negative, catastrophizing or expecting the worst to happen, and polarizing or only seeing back and white[7].

            When you stop blaming yourself for everything and start focusing on the positive, expecting things to work out, and seeing the areas of grey in life, you reverse these negative mindsets and engage in positive self-talk.

            When you speak words of kindness to yourself, your brain responds with a more positive attitude. That attitude will affect everything you do. It’s how you take care of yourself if you had a bad day.

            Check in with yourself to know when you are having negative self-talk. Are you seeing patterns? When did they start to become a problem? Are you able to turn these thoughts around?

            6. Use Coping Skills and Take a Break

            Use your coping skills. This means not letting your thoughts take control of yourself.

            You can distract yourself and escape a bit. Do things you love. You can exercise, listen to music, dance, volunteer or help someone, be in nature, or read a book.

            It isn’t about repression. It’s about redirection. You can’t stay in thoughts that are no longer working for you.

            Sometimes, it’s okay to get out of your own way. Give yourself a break from the things going on in your head. You can always come back to a problem later. This may even help you figure out the best course of action as sometimes stepping away is the only way to see the solution.

            If you had a bad day, you may not feel like addressing what went wrong. You may need a break, so take one.

            7. If a Bad Day Turns Into Bad Days

            “I believe depression is legitimate. But I also believe that if you don’t exercise, eat nutritious food, get sunlight, get enough sleep, consume positive material, surround yourself with support, then you aren’t giving yourself a fighting chance.” –Jim Carrey

            If you’ve been feeling out of control, depressed, or unstable for more than a few weeks, it’s time to call a mental health professional. This is not because you have failed in any way. It’s because you are human, and you simply need help.

            You may not be able to quickly rebound from a bad day, and that’s fine. Feel what you feel, but don’t let it consume you.

            When you talk to a professional, share the techniques that you have already tried here and whether they were helpful. They may tell you additional ideas or gain insights from your struggles of not being able to rebound from a series of bad days.

            If you’re having more than just a bad day, they will want to know. If you don’t have the answers, that’s okay, too. You just need to try these tools and figure out how you’re feeling. That’s all that’s required of you.

            Keep taking care of yourself. Any progress is progress, no matter how small. Give yourself a chance to get better by reaching out.

            Final Thoughts

            If you had a bad day, don’t let it stop you.

            Know this: It’s okay not to be okay. You have a right to feel what you feel. But there is something you can do about it.

            You can invest in yourself via self-care.

            You are not alone in this. Everyone has bad days from time to time. You just need to know that you are the positive things you tell yourself.

            More Things You Can Do If You Had a Bad Day

            Featured photo credit: Anthony Tran via unsplash.com

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