Without continual growth and progress, such words as improvement, achievement, and success have no meaning.
People in general can be described as social animals. We need interaction with others in order to develop. Most people do not like the initial stages of adversity. Conflict and difficulty create uncertainty and impact our judgment and focus.Advertising
As much as people try to avoid it, hard times are a part of life. Positive change can come from conflict. The key is to deal with the issues at hand and push through towards resolution. Avoidance and inaction only intensify the problem. Stop doing these 10 things so that you can push through hard times.
1. Hiding from reality.
There is a classic bumper sticker stating, “Life Is A Beach.” Sometimes this is not true. Tough things happen and are part of reality. You cannot ignore problems and wish them away. Accept things for what they are. It is the first step to overcoming obstacles.
2. Playing the blame game.
Picture this scenario. Your neighbor has a brand new SUV in their driveway. You see your 6 year old sedan in yours. You want to get a better vehicle but financially are not able. Resentment may build for your neighbor’s ability to buy the car. However, the responsibility ultimately rests with you. Accept your situation and take accountability so you can move on.Advertising
3. Reliving the past.
Most people seem to have a stage that they look back on where life was good. Too many think back on those times and wish to relive them. It is not possible to go back in time and relive memories. Think back on them to remember what made them good. Use those memories as momentum to create positive things now and in your future. Alternatively, if you tend to relive negative memories, try to let them go. You can’t change what happened in the past; you can only change what is going to happen in the future.
4. Being complacent.
Have you ever seen an upset three year old curl up in a ball and suck his thumb? It looks cute for a three year old, but not for an adult. But that is what you are doing when you are complacent. Problems do not take care of themselves. Take action, even if it is the wrong action, to get through hard times.
5. Worrying too much.
It is natural for us as people to have blinders on. When hard times occur we have a narrow of view of things. Remember the big picture of situations. Sometimes you will see a solution that you may not have realized before.Advertising
6. Thinking it’s worse than it is.
You feel like you are pushing a boulder up a hill when faced with difficulties. But a solution can be found with resolve and tenacity. Take personal debt as an example. It may seem overwhelming, but can be overcome with planning and time. Work at a problem and eventually it will be overcome.
7. Not smiling.
You have probably heard the saying, “it takes more muscles to frown than to smile.” When complications in life occur, it is easy for us to have a miserable outlook. Smile more and be good natured to others even through difficulties. That attitude will reciprocate and help buoy your spirits.
8. Not having answers.
Information is so readily available in this day and age. You can just Google anything or check out topics on Wikipedia. When conflict occurs it seems like there are no answers. Take a step back and look at the problems you face. Get input from others with a different perspective.Advertising
Imagine walking down the street and then stopping. You don’t move forward or back; you just stand there. It may seem kind of silly, but that is what you do when you procrastinate. Part of the problem may be “analysis paralysis,” which when you over-think something instead of taking action. Set a goal and work towards reaching it.
10. Doing it alone.
When hard times occur you may feel the need to tackle problems on your own. This could stem from feelings of guilt or frustration. There are times when you need to reach out to others for assistance. Everyone is wired differently and have different ways of thinking. Use the experience of others to get through hard times. The time may come when they may need your help.
History provides great examples of hardships faced by people throughout the world, with stories of how adversity was overcome and triumph followed. This can happen for each of us in our own lives. This post started with a quote from Benjamin Franklin and ends with one from Kelly Clarkson: “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.”
Featured photo credit: Tambako The Jaguar via flickr.com
Last Updated on July 10, 2020
How to Reinvent Yourself and Change Your Life
There will always be times in your life when you may need to learn how to reinvent yourself. This could come when you experience a big change, such as leaving your job, moving on from a relationship, transferring to a new home, or losing a loved one. If you are going through a major shift in your life, you may have to find new ways of thinking or doing things, or risk failing to reach your full potential.
“When something bad happens, you have three choices. You can let it define you, let it destroy you, or you can let it strengthen you.”
Many people who dared to leave their old unhappy lives enabled themselves to pursue their passions and find a renewed zest for living. You can also achieve the same if you take a leap of faith and make things happen for yourself.
To help you always be at your best wherever you may be in your life, here are some practical tips on how to reinvent yourself.
The Reinvention Checklist
Before embarking on a journey of self-reinvention, you need to make sure that you have everything that you need to make the trip bump-proof. These things include:
Problems and obstacles are guaranteed to happen. Some of them will be difficult and may knock you off course; the important thing, however, is that you learn from these difficulties, never lose focus, and always get back up. This requires building resilience to get through the tough times.
Humans are social beings. Although it is important that you learn to rely on yourself when facing any challenge, it is also important to have a support team that you can lean on to give you a boost when things get too tough and to correct you when you’re making mistakes.
The key is to find the right balance between independence and dependence. Don’t be afraid to be vulnerable and share the difficulties you’re facing. When you open up, you’ll find the people who are really going to be there for you.
During the process of learning how to reinvent yourself, you will have to pull yourself away from your old comfort zones, habits, roles, and self-perceptions. This can be difficult and cause you to question your self-worth, so it’s important to engage in self-care to maintain a positive outlook and keep your mind and body healthy as you face the challenges that await you. Self-care can include:
- Participating in a hobby you enjoy
- Spending time with your support system
- Taking some time to walk in nature
- Practicing loving-kindness meditation
Find what works for you and what helps you feel like your true self as you seek a reinvented version of you.
How to Reinvent Yourself
Once you’re sure that you’re equipped with all the tools in the self-reinvention checklist, you can begin your journey of learning how to reinvent yourself.
1. Discover Your Strengths
This step provides valuable information on how you deal with certain situations. If you have this information, you will be able to manage difficulties more efficiently.
To find out what your strengths are, you can ask your friends and colleagues for feedback, engage in self-reflection, or try these 10 Ways to Find Your Own Personal Strengths.
This step calls for a thorough assessment of your current emotional, psychological, and financial status so that you can develop plans that are realistic and practical.
It’s okay to have ambitious dreams, but your plans have to be realistic. Making use of SMART goals can help you plan your life better.
Ultimately, you’ll want to create specific long-term and short-term goals that you can create milestones for. By doing this, you’ll lay out a specific roadmap to your reinvented self.
3. Try Things Out
Sometimes, we don’t know if solutions actually work until we try them out. This is why it is important to experiment whenever possible, especially if you’re dealing with a career change. You may need to simply experiment in order to find the things you like. This can be the same with hobbies. If you’re not sure what you would like doing, accept invitations from friends to join them in their favorite sport or take a class, like pottery or photography.
By seeing what’s out there in any area of your life, you’ll have a better chance of finding the things you enjoy and the goals you want to create.
4. Manage Your Finances Well
Changes may require a bit of money. If you’re shifting to a new career, you may have to pay for training. If you’re going through a tough divorce or having a hard time dealing with the death of a loved one, you may have to pay for therapy. If you’re moving to a new home, you’ll definitely have to pay a whole lot of expenses.
All of these things are possible, but it will require a bit of money savviness as you learn how to reinvent yourself. If you have that cushion, you’ll feel more comfortable straying from your current path to try new things.
5. Muster Your Courage
Fears and self-doubt may arise when you encounter difficulties and setbacks. Sometimes, they may also come when you’re taking risks. You have to manage these negative emotions well and not allow them to discourage you. Tap into your courage and try doing at least one new thing each week to develop it.
Learn how to deal with your self-doubts to move forward in this article: How Self Doubt Keeps You Stuck (And How to Overcome It)
6. Use Your Support Group
As stated above, you need to build a strong support group before you even start the process of reinventing yourself. Your group will keep you from taking wrong turns and encourage you when you get too weighed down by problems. Don’t be afraid to call them, or even ask them out for coffee if you need to vent about the current difficulties you’re facing.
7. Remind Yourself Every Day of Your Commitment
Write your goals on different-sized cards and scatter them at home and at work in places where you can easily see them. This way, you will constantly be reminded of where you want to be. Remember, writing down your goals helps them stick.
8. Accept Failure, Learn, and Resume Your Journey
Failing is normal, especially when we’re trying out something new. When you fail, simply recognize it, learn from it, and move on. Failure, in the end, is the best way to learn what does and doesn’t work, and you simply won’t be able to learn how to reinvent yourself if you don’t accept the inevitable failures that await you.
If you truly want to learn how to reinvent yourself and live the life you desire, take the advice above and start taking action. It will take time, patience, and plenty of effort to make the change you want happen, but it will be all worth it.
More Tips on How to Reinvent Yourself
- 10 Things You Can Do Now to Change Your Life Forever
- How to Start Over and Reboot Your Life When It Seems Too Late
- 7 Ways to Make Life Changing Decisions
Featured photo credit: Ashley Rich via unsplash.com