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10 Things to Remember If Your Loved Ones Are Scientists

10 Things to Remember If Your Loved Ones Are Scientists

Scientists are a strange lot. If you’re lucky enough to have a scientist as a loved one, you’ve also stared at them and wondered exactly what goes on in their heads. I know this because that’s what my wife tells me. I’ve spent my entire career as a scientist, from nuclear chemist to rocket scientist with multiple US Patents.

Being a scientist, I can tell you that there are times when even we aren’t sure what’s going on in our heads. Being the analytical people we are, we tend to be very introspective, very detail oriented, and, for better or worse, very straight forward.

I’ve been a scientist for over 20 years now, so here is some insight into the scientist’s world.

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1. We see the world through scientific lenses.

Just as artists see the world through an artist’s lens, scientists see the world through scientific lenses. We tend to think analytically, always wondering how things work, and sometimes looking for ways to improve whatever it is we’re looking at. Having this worldview also impacts the language we use to describe things to others and how they understand the way things work. If your loved one is a scientist, learning some of their language will be beneficial in translating their words from science-speak to plain English.

2. We’re slightly nuts.

Scientists often perform very mentally-taxing work. Having to think hard, seemingly all the time, can drive some people mad. Scientists, and good scientists in particular, channel that madness into their sense of humor. In the 20+ years I’ve worked as a scientist, I’ve found that some of the most talented people are also just a little bit crazy.

3. We’re always thinking.

For most scientists, the job doesn’t end when the work day is over. We know that inspiration can come at any time of the day and in any situation. Therefore, we all have a whiteboard in our heads where we mentally take notes, work out problems, design experiments, etc. If you catch us looking up and to the left, just know we’re writing on that mental whiteboard.

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Another side effect of always thinking is that we sometimes verbalize our thoughts to help us process. In the 10 years my wife and I have been together, she’s learned to ask whether I’m talking to her or just talking out loud. In the cases where it’s the latter, my wife knows she really doesn’t have to listen to a word I say, I’m just processing data.

4. We’re resilient.

Scientists know that >90% of their experiments will end up in failure and good scientists don’t let this stop them. Rebounding from endless failures in the laboratory transfers to real life where failures are often greeted with a shrug and a few moments of reflection on lessons learned before moving on to the next plan. Talk to any scientist and they’ll tell you far more “hmm…that wasn’t supposed to happen” stories than “eureka!” stories—and they typically involve unexpected fires, broken glassware, and sometimes even explosions.

5. We can come off as aloof.

Being analytically oriented, we take in data constantly. It doesn’t matter if we’re watching television, at the grocery store, or in social situations. If your scientist, like me, is an introvert by nature, being in their own heads is their safe space. In there we review everything that’s going on around us, analyzing the situation we’re in, and formulating the best solution. The downside to this is that we often come off as aloof, disinterested in what’s going on around us. It’s something almost all scientists struggle with how to engage in the seemingly banal after spending our days pondering how to unlock the secrets of the universe.

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6. We often give complicated answers to simple questions.

Scientists deal in complexity. Because of this, simplicity tends to be elusive. It’s like the old saying goes, “ask him what time it is and he’ll tell you how to build a watch.” For those of you who remember the TV series Cheers, asking a scientist a simple question will often get you a Cliff Claven answer. If you find yourself getting frustrated because your scientist won’t give you a simple answer, remember that, to him/her, the question you asked cannot be answered simply. Be patient with your scientist; they’ll get to the answer you’re looking for—eventually.

7. We can be painfully honest.

Scientists often don’t have time to entertain extraneous nonsense. We’re taught and trained to seek out and identify a problem’s root cause. We view data objectively, without emotion, and simply “calls ’em like we sees ’em.” Keep this in mind before you ask your scientist “what should I do?” They’ll ask you a few direct questions, mull over the information you give them, and usually give you an honest, no B.S. answer. Problem solving has no emotional component to it—most of the time. Because of this, we scientists do tend to deliver our opinions without the tact the situation sometimes needs. Think Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory and you’ll have an idea of how this plays out.

8. We can struggle to be empathetic at times.

After asking a scientist what you should do, be prepared to implement the suggested solution. If you come back to your scientist and ask them what you should do about the same problem, they’ll ask you if you did what they suggested last time you asked. If the answer is no, they’ll be disinterested in helping you out further until you’ve attempted the first solution they gave you. They see no sense in offering another solution when the first one hasn’t even been tried. Plus, we can’t offer a different solution if we don’t know how the first solution fared. It’s not that we don’t care about what you’re going through; it’s just that we see little sense in dwelling on a problem when there are solutions available.

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9. We’re creative problem solvers.

Scientists are innovators. Whether in the research lab, on the manufacturing floor, or around the house, we’re always looking for ways to best solve problems—even those that may not yet exist. Now, sometimes our solutions may be 2-parts Rube Goldberg and 4-parts Steam-punk and seem completely illogical to you, but you can never doubt our creativity! This, however, does not extend across multiple disciplines. There are plenty of times my wife has questioned the complexity of my solution to a problem outside of my expertise—and plenty of times she’s rightfully chuckled at my attempts at building a better mousetrap.

10. We sometimes have difficulty making decisions.

There is a downside to thinking analytically, and its common name is “paralysis by analysis.” Scientists hunger for data and, well, if we feel we don’t have enough data to make a good decision we won’t decide. For example, a few years ago I was searching for a new car. Most people will check a couple websites, test drive a couple models, and they’ll have enough to make their choice. Not me. I had a stack of brochures two feet high and a spreadsheet that cross compared every possible specification of the cars I was interested in. I wanted to be sure I was making the absolute best choice for my money. If your scientist has seemingly endless stacks of printed pages, brochures, or bookmarked product review websites, just know they’re doing all they can to make the best choice they can.

Scientists are a proud folk. We pride ourselves on problem solving, pushing technology forward, and unlocking the secrets of the universe. It’s sometimes difficult to transition from data driven scientist to personable human, particularly when working on a complex issue at our jobs. If you are close to a scientist, you’ll have a loyal, smart, and honest companion to travel the roads of life with,

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Christian Salafia

Rocket-scientist, Nuclear Engineer, Theologian, and creator of the TransformRadio podcast

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Last Updated on July 15, 2019

41 Beautiful Pictures That Show What True Love Is All About

41 Beautiful Pictures That Show What True Love Is All About

Some things in life are hard to describe, yet we can recognize them when we see them.

Love is one of those things.

True love comes in many different forms, but here are some that many of us know well.

True love means supporting those who can’t support themselves

supportive couple

    A young man comforts his date in Times Square, New York City. Image by mbtrama

    strong hug

      A young man holds his significant other close to him. Image by Brad Fults

      running help

        A young track competitor helps one of her injured opponents over the finish line. Image from ViralNova.com

        feeding kitten

          A soldier in the Korean War takes time to feed a baby kitten. Image from US Naval Insititute

          It’s having the perfect selfie partner

          mom and daughter selfie

            A mother and her daughter take a selfie together. Image by Andrew Fysh

            girlfriends

              Two young girls pose for the camera. Image by Rolands Lakis

              selfies

                A happy couple takes a picture together. Image by Kayla Heineman

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                selfie

                  Two best friends take a selfie together. Image by Jason Wahido

                  dude selfie

                    Friends take a selfie together. Image by Glenn Scofield Williams

                    It’s all the warm fuzzies

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                      A young man spends time with his dog on a beach. Image by Magdalena Roeseler

                      DSC06952

                        A pet owner hugs his dog while on a day trip in San Francisco. Image by Taro the Shiba Inu

                        It means having a friend to photobomb you

                        photobomb

                          A boy makes a funny face as he poses for a picture with his brother. Image by Michael Bentley

                          old man photobomb

                            A man photobombs his wife while their grandson snaps a picture. Image by Frank

                            family photobomb

                              Family members photobomb their relatives’ Thanksgiving day family photo. Image by Beth Scupham

                              boyfriend photobomb

                                A friend photobombs the photographer and their friend, the woman in the foreground of this photo. Image by Lachlan Hardy

                                True love means being there even when life gets unbearably hard

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                                shoulder to cry on

                                  A family watches the Vermont National Guard depart for Afghanistan. Image by The U.S. Army

                                  flood dog

                                    During a monsoon in the Philippines, a boy carries his dog to safety. Image by Romeo Ranoco

                                    A woman is rescued from flood waters by a resident standing on top of her car during heavy rain in Chalandri suburb north of Athens

                                      A man helps a woman out of her vehicle during a flood in Chalandri, Greece. Image by John Kolesidis

                                      lunch

                                        A woman has lunch with her husband every day, even after he’s passed away. Image from ViralNova.com

                                        hug

                                          A woman hugs the mother of 6-year-old Noah Ponzer, who was one of the victims of the Sandy Hook shootings. Image by Spencer Platt

                                          rubble

                                            An Oklahoma couple pauses while trying to salvage belongings from a family member’s home after a tornado. Image by Adrees Latif

                                            sister and brother

                                              A girl puts her arm around her little brother as they wait outside of Sandy Hook Elementary after gunshots are fired. Image by Reuters.

                                              headstone

                                                A woman sits at her husband’s grave the day before their wedding anniversary. Image from NBC news

                                                It means taking the time for long goodbyes

                                                110321-N-BT887-100

                                                  A man says goodbye to his son before deploying. Image by Official U.S. Navy Page

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                                                  national guard goodbye

                                                    A South Carolina man says goodbye to his son before deploying for Afghanistan. Image by The National Guard

                                                    saying goodbye

                                                      A Sergeant hugs both of his sons before being deployed to Afghanistan. Image by The National Guard

                                                      And cherishing reunions

                                                      husband home

                                                        A woman hugs her husband as she sees him for the first time since his deployment to Iraq. Image by The U.S. Army

                                                        boyfriend home

                                                          A young  woman hugs her significant other as he returns home for Kuwait. Image by The National Guard

                                                          mother hug

                                                            A mother drops to her knees as she hugs her son on her return home from the Persian Gulf. Image by The National Guard

                                                            True love is letting yourself feel young when they’re around

                                                            elderly women

                                                              Two friends on their smartphones. Image by Robert Neff

                                                              feeling young

                                                                A young couple getting their picture taken. Image by db Photograph

                                                                sprinkler dad

                                                                  A father plays in a sprinkler with his daughter at Millennium Park in Chicago. Image by Ben Forsberg

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                                                                  subway couple

                                                                    A young couple on a subway enjoys sharing time together, while the girlfriend’s father sneaks a photo of them. Image by Gareth Williams

                                                                    wheelchairs

                                                                      A couple holds hands on a fall day. Image by David Amsler

                                                                      It’s letting yourself be silly… just because they’ll enjoy it

                                                                      silly faces

                                                                        A grandfather makes faces at the camera with his granddaughters. Image by Tim Pierce

                                                                        vote for pedro

                                                                          A woman’s father wears a Napoleon Dynamite t-shirt to make his daughter laugh. Image by emdot

                                                                          True love is allowing yourself to show how you really feel

                                                                          date night

                                                                            A young couple kisses in the back of a restaurant in Washington, D.C. Image by Derek Key

                                                                            playing violin

                                                                              Violinist Nancy Dinovo plays at a memorial service for the victims of 9/11. Image by Christopher Morris

                                                                              True love is timeless

                                                                              old friends

                                                                                Friends spending some time together. Image by Cristian Bortes

                                                                                sitting around a fire

                                                                                  A group of friends sits around a campfire eating. Image by New Old Stock

                                                                                  elderly couple

                                                                                    An elderly couple walks down a street together. Image by Matteo Paciotti

                                                                                    Featured photo credit: Matteo Paciotti via flickr.com

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