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10 Things to Remember if You Care Too Much About What Others Think

10 Things to Remember if You Care Too Much About What Others Think

We all care, in one form or another, what others think of us and our choices in life. The funny thing is that it’s usually not a stranger in the street offering their opinion, but more often than not, a family member or a close friend. Someone’s opinion of you can have a huge impact on your life, if you let it. But there’s a huge difference between caring and worrying about what other people think of you.

If you care, it’s more likely to mean that you respect their opinion and view point, and that you’ll consider and review it, but still choose to go your own way. However, if you worry all the time, this takes it a whole lot further and can soon affect your decision making. You may become a people pleaser who listens to every opinion but your own, which, in the long term, can chip away at your self-belief.

It’s human nature to want to be liked and respected, but how much you care about what others think is up to you. With this in mind, I would like to share some reminders about what to remember when you care too much about what others think of you.

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People don’t think about you as much as you think they do.

Most of the people around you think in terms of themselves and what affects them and their lives. You and your choices rarely come anywhere near their radar, and if they do, it’s not as often as you might think. Think about it for a moment: how often do you think about a decision your friend has just made? Okay, maybe for the first few minutes, but I very much doubt you sit there consciously thinking and fretting about it for days on end.

It’s none of your business.

What people think about you is their business and not yours. Even if you find out what their opinion is of you, it cannot change who you are or how you live your life. The only way it change your life is if you let it control you and make other people’s thoughts your priority. You really cannot control what other people think, so give up now and concentrate only on what you think about you.

The one and only unique you.

This is a great one to remember. When you worry about what other people think of you, you start to let it take away your individuality, and you think you should conform in some way. Instead, look at it differently and remember that you are the only version of you: you are unique, special and perfect in your own way. Treasure your uniqueness, get all your hair cut off if you want to, wear some outrageous clothes, and get that piercing you’ve always wanted to get. Be who you are. Respect that and you will be much happier.

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Why does it matter to you anyway?

How does it really affect you and your life if someone disapproves of something you’ve done or said?  Are you going to change every time someone says they don’t like something? I think not. Try to imagine whether a comment about how you look or what you say will really matter to you in a week or so. If you try to look at things in this way, you’ll save a lot of worrying for nothing.

Are you psychic?

If you have ‘special powers’ and are well-versed in using a crystal ball, you’ll know what people are thinking. But the majority of you reading this probably aren’t psychic, so my question is: how do you know what others are thinking? You see, the problem here is your thinking, and what you are assuming they are thinking. Crazy, don’t you think? So unless you can read minds, give up caring about how others think of you.

Accept how other people think of you is their problem, not yours.

How many times have you looked at someone from a distance, judged them by their appearance, and then subsequently met them and changed your whole opinion? Many times, I am sure. You see, you never really get the full picture about someone, not really. So if someone forms an opinion about you without all the information and based on superficial things, then that’s their problem, not yours. Let them worry about it while you get on with your life knowing the full story.

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Choose to be mindful of yourself and present at all times.

This is about working out how you want to feel on a day-to-day basis. Do you want to be consumed with constant thoughts about other people and what they think of you? Stop worrying about a past comment or worrying about something someone ‘might’ do or say in the future. Be ever present in the here and now and remember that you have full responsibility for your own thoughts. It all boils down to how you want to live your life. Do you want to be miserable and a people pleaser, or a happy, good person who understands that some people have opinions, but it’s your choice whether to let it affect you or not. That is life!

Surround yourself with people who accept you.

Being able to count on good friends is important for your health and mind, so perhaps it’s time to avoid spending time with people or family who don’t accept your way of life or the choices you make.  There will always be some people who don’t agree with you, so you can either choose to ignore them or move on without them. Remember to surround yourself with the positive, uplifting and inspiring people who accept you, warts and all.

Everyone cares what others think about them.

You are not alone in this thinking. Everyone else has the same cares, worries and thoughts.  It’s human nature to do this. So next time someone criticizes you, try to imagine it from their point of view. Perhaps you are bringing something out in them that they wish they could do, so their first reaction is to put you down. Be mindful of this and you’ll rest a whole lot easier when you sleep at night.

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Be true to who you are.

Being who you are means being honest and speaking out even if it scares you to death. Today nearly everyone is on social media sites such as Facebook and Twitter. Posting our status updates, our pictures and sharing our most intimate stories seems to be the norm, so if you are going to do it, do it with honesty and integrity. Speak your mind and do not worry what other people think. As long as you aren’t setting out to intentionally hurt anyone, do it with pride.  Above all, don’t fake it. Be who you are and those who care about you will accept you, while those who don’t won’t.  So stop apologizing, stop just existing, and start living!

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Last Updated on September 20, 2018

7 Powerful Questions To Find Out What You Want To Do With Your Life

7 Powerful Questions To Find Out What You Want To Do With Your Life

What do I want to do with my life? It’s a question all of us think about at one point or another.

For some, the answer comes easily. For others, it takes a lifetime to figure out.

It’s easy to just go through the motions and continue to do what’s comfortable and familiar. But for those of you who seek fulfillment, who want to do more, these questions will help you paint a clearer picture of what you want to do with your life.

1. What are the things I’m most passionate about?

The first step to living a more fulfilling life is to think about the things that you’re passionate about.

What do you love? What fulfills you? What “work” do you do that doesn’t feel like work? Maybe you enjoy writing, maybe you love working with animals or maybe you have a knack for photography.

The point is, figure out what you love doing, then do more of it.

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2. What are my greatest accomplishments in life so far?

Think about your past experiences and the things in your life you’re most proud of.

How did those accomplishments make you feel? Pretty darn good, right? So why not try and emulate those experiences and feelings?

If you ran a marathon once and loved the feeling you had afterwards, start training for another one. If your child grew up to be a star athlete or musician because of your teachings, then be a coach or mentor for other kids.

Continue to do the things that have been most fulfilling for you.

3. If my life had absolutely no limits, what would I choose to have and what would I choose to do?

Here’s a cool exercise: Think about what you would do if you had no limits.

If you had all the money and time in the world, where would you go? What would you do? Who would you spend time with?

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These answers can help you figure out what you want to do with your life. It doesn’t mean you need millions of dollars to be happy though.

What it does mean is answering these questions will help you set goals to reach certain milestones and create a path toward happiness and fulfillment. Which leads to our next question …

4. What are my goals in life?

Goals are a necessary component to set you up for a happy future. So answer these questions:

Once you figure out the answers to each of these, you’ll have a much better idea of what you should do with your life.

5. Whom do I admire most in the world?

Following the path of successful people can set you up for success.

Think about the people you respect and admire most. What are their best qualities? Why do you respect them? What can you learn from them?

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You’re the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with.[1] So don’t waste your time with people who hold you back from achieving your dreams.

Spend more time with happy, successful, optimistic people and you’ll become one of them.

6. What do I not like to do?

An important part of figuring out what you want to do with your life is honestly assessing what you don’t want to do.

What are the things you despise? What bugs you the most about your current job?

Maybe you hate meetings even though you sit through 6 hours of them every day. If that’s the case, find a job where you can work more independently.

The point is, if you want something to change in your life, you need to take action. Which leads to our final question …

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7. How hard am I willing to work to get what I want?

Great accomplishments never come easy. If you want to do great things with your life, you’re going to have to make a great effort. That will probably mean putting in more hours the average person, getting outside your comfort zone and learning as much as you can to achieve as much as you can.

But here’s the cool part: it’s often the journey that is the most fulfilling part. It’s during these seemingly small, insignificant moments that you’ll often find that “aha” moments that helps you answer the question,

“What do I want to do with my life?”

So take the first step toward improving your life. You won’t regret it.

Featured photo credit: Andrew Ly via unsplash.com

Reference

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