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10 Simple Ways To Deal With Sadness When You Still Need To Work

10 Simple Ways To Deal With Sadness When You Still Need To Work

There’s overwhelming pressure to look happy at work when you’re dealing with sadness. The “mask” you wear can be unbearable.  What happens when you just filed for divorce?  When your children are in trouble? When you’re in trouble?  There is a way to accept your sadness and not let it control you.  The last thing you want is to appear weak or vulnerable in the office.  Here are some ways to help you deal with sadness and stay focused.

1. Be sad.

Don’t force happy. As long as you get the work done on time, no one is going to notice. Aside from crying openly in the office, manage your sadness in other ways:  write yourself an email listing all your sad thoughts, bring a knitted-stress ball to work.  You can stick needles in it during lunch as you imagine the person or thing doing you wrong.  It’s important not to hold this heavy, negative energy in your body.  You may let it out on the wrong person in the next cubicle.

2. Put together a self-care kit & don’t forget it at home.

Your bag is going to be heavy during this time, but for good reason.  Bring a few of your favorite magazines, lavender oil for relaxation, scented hand cream, aspirin, and a few bags of your favorite hot beverage, like coffee, tea or cocoa.  When everything else fails, grab one of these before a meltdown.

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3. Eat well.

Cooking is one of the hardest things to do when sad, so keep it simple, but delicious.  Favorite kid foods can bring back memories of comfortable, safe moments growing up.  Fix a couple of almond butter and strawberry jam sandwiches or a simple grilled cheese with tomato soup.  These pack enough basic nutrition to keep you alive, give you some energy to make eye contact, and help you last until the next break.

4. Listen to audio books.

It’s one of the best ways to keep people off your back.  Pop in a motivational book or the latest novel and drift away.  If you find your mind wandering, turn it off, but keep the plugs in your ears. Passersby will think you’re still listening and will not want to disturb you.

5. Do productive spurts of 45 minutes.

You have little energy for work, when all your energy is working out what’s happening in your life. Break your days up into 45-minute blocks of steady productivity.  After each block, smoke a cigarette, take a walk, or disappear for a few minutes to clear your head.  If you have to stay near the phone, consider letting some calls go to voicemail in between blocks to give you time to clear your head, and start again.

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6. Keep pesky co-workers at bay.

Establish healthy boundaries with talkative types who demand time and energy to act like you’re really interested in what they’re saying. You can use email and skip the face-to-face “check-ins.”

7. Eat at your desk.

Instead of joining the crew for lunch, stay behind.  You can eat in your office or desk and sit with your sadness. Be open to any solutions that arise.  Again, don’t suppress how you feel.  Oftentimes, in the routine of a workday, you may get the answers you need.

8. Get some sun and fresh air.

Leave the office.  If eating lunch at your desk doesn’t work, step outside for some fresh air, and natural vitamin D.  Vitamin D is a natural mood booster, and all it takes is 10 minutes.  The fresh air will soothe your nerves and give you a sense of well-being.

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9. Spend time in the bathroom.

Can’t sit at your desk for lunch or leave the office without someone making a big stink?  Go to the bathroom for a little rest and relaxation.  Not exactly the most serene place, but a notable venue for contemplation.  Stand or sit and do some deep breathing (bring that lavender oil, just in case) and feel your sadness.  Let it out. There’s plenty of tissue on deck.

10. Ask for help.

If you feel overwhelmed, ask a trusted colleague to help.  Perhaps, you can offer to take a shift or finish one of their projects as an exchange.  Keep the work you’re handing over small, and manageable, and use your free-time to focus on less, demanding tasks.

Sometimes the best way to deal with sadness that lasts more than a few days is to take some time off.  They don’t call them “personal days” for nothing.

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Last Updated on October 6, 2020

15 Things Highly Confident People Don’t Do

15 Things Highly Confident People Don’t Do

Highly confident people believe in their ability to achieve. If you don’t believe in yourself, why should anyone else put their faith in you? To walk with swagger and improve your self-confidence, watch out for these fifteen things highly confident people don’t do.

And if you want to know the difference between an arrogant person and a confident person, watch this video first:

 

1. They don’t make excuses.

Highly confident people take ownership of their thoughts and actions. They don’t blame the traffic for being tardy at work; they were late. They don’t excuse their short-comings with excuses like “I don’t have the time” or “I’m just not good enough”; they make the time and they keep on improving until they are good enough.

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2. They don’t avoid doing the scary thing.

Highly confident people don’t let fear dominate their lives. They know that the things they are afraid of doing are often the very same things that they need to do in order to evolve into the person they are meant to be.

3. They don’t live in a bubble of comfort.

Highly confident people avoid the comfort zone, because they know this is a place where dreams die. They actively pursue a feeling of discomfort, because they know stretching themselves is mandatory for their success.

4. They don’t put things off until next week.

Highly confident people know that a good plan executed today is better than a great plan executed someday. They don’t wait for the “right time” or the “right circumstances”, because they know these reactions are based on a fear of change. They take action here, now, today – because that’s where progress happens.

5. They don’t obsess over the opinions of others.

Highly confident people don’t get caught up in negative feedback. While they do care about the well-being of others and aim to make a positive impact in the world, they don’t get caught up in negative opinions that they can’t do anything about. They know that their true friends will accept them as they are, and they don’t concern themselves with the rest.

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6. They don’t judge people.

Highly confident people have no tolerance for unnecessary, self-inflicted drama. They don’t feel the need to insult friends behind their backs, participate in gossip about fellow co-workers or lash out at folks with different opinions. They are so comfortable in who they are that they feel no need to look down on other people.

7. They don’t let lack of resources stop them.

Highly confident people can make use of whatever resources they have, no matter how big or small. They know that all things are possible with creativity and a refusal to quit. They don’t agonize over setbacks, but rather focus on finding a solution.

8. They don’t make comparisons.

Highly confident people know that they are not competing with any other person. They compete with no other individual except the person they were yesterday. They know that every person is living a story so unique that drawing comparisons would be an absurd and simplistic exercise in futility.

9. They don’t find joy in people-pleasing.

Highly confident people have no interest in pleasing every person they meet. They are aware that not all people get along, and that’s just how life works. They focus on the quality of their relationships, instead of the quantity of them.

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10. They don’t need constant reassurance.

Highly confident people aren’t in need of hand-holding. They know that life isn’t fair and things won’t always go their way. While they can’t control every event in their life, they focus on their power to react in a positive way that moves them forward.

11. They don’t avoid life’s inconvenient truths.

Highly confident people confront life’s issues at the root before the disease can spread any farther. They know that problems left unaddressed have a way of multiplying as the days, weeks and months go by. They would rather have an uncomfortable conversation with their partner today than sweep an inconvenient truth under the rug, putting trust at risk.

12. They don’t quit because of minor set-backs.

Highly confident people get back up every time they fall down. They know that failure is an unavoidable part of the growth process. They are like a detective, searching for clues that reveal why this approach didn’t work. After modifying their plan, they try again (but better this time).

13. They don’t require anyone’s permission to act.

Highly confident people take action without hesitation. Every day, they remind themselves, “If not me, who?”

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14. They don’t limit themselves to a small toolbox.

Highly confident people don’t limit themselves to Plan A. They make use of any and all weapons that are at their disposal, relentlessly testing the effectiveness of every approach, until they identify the strategies that offer the most results for the least cost in time and effort.

15. They don’t blindly accept what they read on the Internet as “truth” without thinking about it.

Highly confident people don’t accept articles on the Internet as truth just because some author “said so”. They look at every how-to article from the lens of their unique perspective. They maintain a healthy skepticism, making use of any material that is relevant to their lives, and forgetting about the rest. While articles like this are a fun and interesting thought-exercise, highly confident people know that they are the only person with the power to decide what “confidence” means.

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