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10 Signs That Your Single Life Is Happy Even Though You Don’t Feel Like You Are

10 Signs That Your Single Life Is Happy Even Though You Don’t Feel Like You Are

The single life is often viewed as negative, but in reality, living single symbolizes freedom, independence and untapped potential for growth.

The most obvious stigma attached to the single life is that one ominous word: ‘alone.’  Singles do most things alone, but you don’t have to feel lonely in the process. You just have to learn how to take what you have and use it to make a happy, successful life on your own.

If you have some of these signs, you’re actually on the right track to freedom and happiness as a single.

1.  You come home to an empty house/bed.

There’s nobody to greet you when you come home. Instead of wallowing in the silence, use it to recharge. Set up a routine centered around you. Cater to yourself. Pour that ice cold cocktail or iced tea for yourself. Draw a hot bath and turn down the bed sheets just like you would for a significant other. Cooking for one is still cooking for a loved one – yourself.

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Evenings, when you’re all alone is where you can take advantage of that untapped potential. Use this time to relax and pamper yourself. Read a great book. Work out. Brainstorm on how to get ahead in your job. Arrange and maintain your home to your exact preference so that when you come home after a long day, you feel safe, relaxed and comfortable.

2.  You can’t cry on your partner’s shoulder after a ‘bad day.’

Successful people, whether single or partnered, always focus on the positive. Instead of missing a partner to cry with, spend your time mentally preparing for the next ‘bad day.’  Look at things you can implement or avoid next time. Think about the skills you used to deal with your day and find ways to make them even stronger. Most of all, find gratitude in as much as possible. Focus on the good, your strengths and what you can do to improve.

3.  Your schedule only includes you and/or your kids.

You have, right before your eyes, your very own life that you run completely. You have the flexibility to control every aspect of your schedule without having to compromise or work around anyone else! This is freedom! Take it and run with it. Look at your goals, your responsibilities, your needs, your kids’ needs and completely organize your entire schedule around this.

4.  You’re the sole financial provider and decision maker.

This isn’t stressful, this is control! When you’re budgeting, you don’t have to worry about a partner’s needs or desires. It’s all about you and/or your children! You won’t be criticized for a decision you made in a hurry. You won’t be questioned as to why money was spent on something a partner might disagree with. Not only do you have time to invest in yourself, but you have the responsibility to invest in yourself, your kids, your interests and your passions. Consider this a gift and use it wisely!

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5.  You don’t have anybody to help you with the ‘Honey-Do’ list.

Does this sound familiar? You come home after a long day and discover your dogs, once again, have escaped out of the fence that you knocked yourself out trying to secure. There’s no money for a new fence. You go back to square one trying to find a way to prop, ‘jimmy-rig,’ and repair the fence to keep the dogs in. After about ten tries, blood, sweat and tears, it works!  At the same time, your neighbor’s dogs get out one time, her husband fixes the fence and their dogs are secure on the first try.

WHY are you frustrated? YOU solved an ongoing problem by yourself! The neighbor simply relied on her husband. What happens next time both of your dogs get out and the neighbor’s husband is no longer available? You have the knowledge and experience to not only help yourself, but to help your neighbor. This is what life is all about!  ‘Help thy neighbor.’

Apply this situation to every single incident that you have no ‘honey’ to help you with. You’ll soon find that your being single can, and will help others many, many times.

“I am thankful to all those who said no.  Because of them, I did it myself.”-Albert Einstein

6.  You feel awkward at social events where there’s always happy couples.

You stick out like a sore thumb because you don’t have a significant other. Embrace it and use it to your advantage. Share your funny stories of being single with married couples. Promote your business. Instead of feeling like you don’t relate, or don’t fit in, listen with an empathic heart and have gratitude that you’ve endured a broken heart and survived. You have no partner right now to endure these troubles with. You came alone, with no relationship issues and you leave alone, with none either!

7.  You don’t have anyone checking up on you if you’re working late.

Don’t let your mind trick you into thinking ‘nobody cares.’ In reality, you have nobody to answer to. You don’t have to face going home and waiting on your significant other even though you’re exhausted. You have nobody you’re letting down, or deserting. You owe nobody your time except for you and/or your kids. So use your time productively to manifest success.

8.  You have nobody to be spontaneous with.

The idea of spontaneity is acting on impulse. The advantage as a single is that you can be spontaneous without having to accommodate a partner’s preferences. Your spontaneous acts can be derived solely on what you like! So go! Be spontaneous, have fun and cater to your own impulses!

9.  You have no one to focus your love and adoration upon.

Showering love and adoration takes energy. So take your energy and invest your love and adoration into the one person who will always be there with you:  YOU.

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10.  You have to tell people you’re single all the time and hear them say, “I’m sorry,” or give you that look of empathy.

The next time someone gives you those puppy dog eyes and says, “Awww, you’re single. I’m sorry.”  Look at them puzzled and ask them why!  You’re flying solo but it’s not a disease! It’s a blessing.  Solo means ‘YOLO!’  You only live once and as a single, you’re 100% independent. Share your victories of independence with those who try and pity you. As a single, you’re accomplishing everything alone, when many others have a partner to fall back on. This is a victory, not a pity party!

Do you have any of these signs of the single life? If you do, you are on the right track! Take these signs and make them work for you instead of wallowing in self-pity. Make your single life a success, because in reality, the only thing that is for sure in this day and age is that YOU have YOU…until death do you part. Go make it a productive, single life!

Go here for more information on living a single life.

Featured photo credit: Viktor Hanacek via picjumbo.com

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Lynn Silva

Lynn Silva helps solo and entrepreneurs develop mental skills for business.

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Last Updated on March 25, 2020

How to Crush Your Lack of Motivation and Always Stay Motivated

How to Crush Your Lack of Motivation and Always Stay Motivated

How many times have you not achieved your goals and let yourself down due to your lack of motivation? When you’re not wallowing in sadness and self-pity, you are too busy procrastinating till you can’t anymore and before you know it, you are part of vicious cycle of anxiety and stress.

Whether it’s losing weight or bringing your business to fruition – motivation is essential for growth and success in every sphere of our lives.

That said, it is not easy staying motivated. In order to constantly stay motivated, you need to take ownership of your life and consciously make efforts in that direction.

Well, it’s never too late to take matters in your hands and change the course of your life. Here are 11 effective ways to crush your lack of motivation and always stay motivated:

1. Write Your Goals

The power of writing goals down has always been underestimated. Why write when you can remember, right? Wrong.

Our thoughts are all over the place and the first step to achieve your goals is to organize your thoughts. So, write your goals down, however big or small they might be. Make them as specific as possible and assign deadlines to each of them.

As you write them down and revisit them regularly, they get further drilled in your head, taking you closer to your goals. Doing this small exercise helps you to remain focused, motivated and lets you track your progress with ease.

Start today – take to your laptop or a diary and get down to writing what you wish to achieve in life.

2. Beat Procrastination

Your lack of motivation and procrastination go hand in hand. Every time you procrastinate, your motivation levels take a greater hit. The only way to bring an end to this loop is to stop procrastinating.

Next time you find yourself putting off something for ‘later’, stop and assess the reasons behind it. Get to the root of the cause and eliminate it in order to overcome this poor habit of procrastinating which is sabotaging your life and mental health.

Take a look at this guide and learn how to beat procrastination:

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What Is Procrastination (And the Complete Guide to Stop Procrastinating)

When you finally overcome procrastination, you will realize the positive impact it has on your mood and motivation levels.

3. Celebrate Small Wins

In the quest to achieve the bigger goals in life, we often forget to celebrate the smaller wins along the way. An achievement is an achievement – be it big or small, it deserves to be acknowledged and celebrated.

Finished a project on time? Reward yourself. Managed to run on the treadmill for a good one hour? Pat yourself on the back. Found time to meditate? Celebrate it.

It is these small achievements that reinstate that we are on the right path and take us one step closer to the bigger goals.

So, get into the habit of recognizing and appreciating small wins. You will be surprised to see how this practice helps you stay motivated.

4. Practice Gratitude

It’s easier to whine about what we don’t have rather than counting our blessings. Isn’t it?

Making gratefulness a part of your life is a very important step to retain high motivational levels. It revitalizes our spirits and renews our enthusiasm for life.

So, how do you practice gratitude? For starters, keep a gratitude journal to jot down what you are grateful for, express your gratitude to people you love and spread positivity wherever you go. If you need some inspiration to be thankful for, here it is:

60 Things To Be Thankful For In Life

By doing so, you begin to focus more on what you have rather than what you don’t and that is a great start to stay motivated.

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5. Be Optimistic

Life is not always hunky dory. There will be bad days when things aren’t going in your favor, when you feel lost and all you want to do is give up.

At such times, instead of letting negativity take over your life, adopt an optimistic approach to life. Quit overthinking, ask the right questions and focus on finding solutions.

Yes, there will be hurdles along the way but if you hang on to positive affirmations and hopes, the journey will be a lot smoother. So, with every passing day, sow the seeds of positivity and you are sure to build a positive environment around you.

6. Don’t Dwell on the Past

A lot of times, our lack of motivation stems from the habit of dwelling on the past. This gives rise to fear and regrets, preventing us from making progress in the present day.

Dwelling on the past is nothing but a waste of time. Understand that the past is long gone, and you cannot do anything to change that.

What you can do is make your present day worthwhile. Instead of looking back and having regrets, learn from your mistakes, forgive yourself and move on.

So, the next time you find your mind wandering off to the past, be determined to change the way you think and consciously concentrate on living in the present. This guide can help you:

10 Simple Steps To Let Go Of The Past

7. Face your Fears

You can never find motivation where there is fear. Identify the fear that is pulling you back and tackle it.

If you don’t face your fear head on, you cannot expect to conquer it and renew your motivation.

Ask yourself: What is stopping you? What are you scared of?

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Once you accept your fear, you can work on an action plan and think of solutions to overcome it. This article will give you some effective tips on conquering your fears:

How to Overcome Your Irrational Fears (That Stop You from Succeeding)

Seek external help if required but don’t choose to turn a blind eye over your fears – it will only aggravate matters.

8. Visualize your Success

You must have heard the famous quote, ‘see it to believe it’. That is exactly what visualization is about.

One of the most effective self-motivation techniques, visualizing the process to your desired outcome helps you move in a positive direction and achieve your goal.

Close your eyes and focus all your energies on the minutest of details that will take you where you want to reach. Doing this exercise everyday inspires you to keep going and not lose hope. The vision of attaining success will drive you to do better while instilling belief and confidence.

9. Find Inspiration

Can’t seem to find inspiration inwards? Don’t panic. There are plenty of external sources to gain inspiration from.

From motivational books and quotes to speeches, films and apps – it is a good idea to take help from motivational material to rekindle your spirits and regain your motivation.

Everyone is wired differently. For instance, a self-help book might work for your friend, but it might do nothing to move you. So, find what inspires you and turn to it when you are in desperate need for motivation.

Finding inspiration externally fills you with hope and sometimes that is all you need.

10. Enjoy Downtime

You are clearly exhausted with all the running you’re doing in life. So much, that you don’t even have time to stop and think what’s causing you so much unhappiness. All you know is that you are lacking motivation and everyday seems to have become a struggle.

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Now, that’s certainly not how you should live the rest of your life.

You need to schedule downtime for yourself, relax and give your mind and body some rest. Take a vacation, indulge in hobbies, meet some friends, put your hair down and stop with all the overthinking. It is important to do things that make you happy in order to think clearly and stay motivated.

11. Meditate Regularly

Meditation lets you take control of your mind. It improves focus and concentration while helping you relax.

Whenever you have had a tough day or find your thoughts going places, the best way to calm yourself down is by closing your eyes and meditating. It helps you to remove all the unnecessary frills in life and keeps you on the right track.

Include meditation in your daily schedule and you are sure to see an improvement in your productivity and motivation.

The Bottom Line

Practicing these simple exercises isn’t the tough part, what’s tough is religiously doing them every day.

However, don’t expect to get rid of your lack of motivation overnight. There will still be days when you will be low on energy but by making these conscious efforts to stay motivated, you are sure to see a vast change in your perspective and your response to bad days.

So, start today and be committed to making a positive change in your life.

More Tips About Staying Motivated

Featured photo credit: Sonnie Hiles via unsplash.com

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