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10 Reasons to Date a Guy Who Reads

10 Reasons to Date a Guy Who Reads

Even though almost everyone learns how to read by the time they’re seven years old, it’s difficult to find people who read for fun. These days with smartphones, social media, hundreds of TV stations and streaming services, and more gaming platforms than you can shake a stick at, people are simply finding other ways to entertain themselves. Believe it or not, there are still men who read and here’s why you should seek those people out and date a guy who reads.

1. They tend to be more sophisticated

date a guy who reads

    Men who read are generally more sophisticated than those who do not. Reading allows people to delve into opinions and realities other than their own and thus it helps improve their perspective. That can result in a higher intelligence, more wisdom, more patience, and more composure. Let’s not forget that people who frequently read are part of a culture of people who read and those people tend to enjoy things like good wine, tea, coffee, comfortable furniture, and mood lighting more than other people.

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    2. They’re more intelligent

    When you read a lot, you learn a lot. Just because they read a fantasy novel filled with dragons and elves doesn’t mean that there aren’t a lot of life lessons baked into those pages. You’ll find who people who read a lot of novels have a better vocabulary than those who read either magazines or not at all. They tend to connect the dots better, take hints better, and react better to new information. They also communicate better, which is one of the most important thing in a relationship. We’re not saying a man who reads is prepared for anything but you’ll definitely hear him utter the words, “I don’t know,” a lot less than normal men.

    3. They’re more creative

    Creativity matters in a relationship. After a few years it begins to get difficult to surprise your significant other or keep the romance fresh. When a guy reads a lot, he absorbs the creativity of authors as if through osmosis. Reading all those scenarios and stories in all of those books gives men ideas that they may not have had otherwise. If you’re in it for the long haul, a heavy reader will find ways to keep things interesting. It may not be skydiving or something ridiculous like that, but those epic scavenger hunts that end with the perfect anniversary gift wasn’t something he just dreamed up. He read it somewhere.

    4. His inner child is more alive

    That means he’ll know how to handle kids when you eventually have some. He’ll be the one who tucks in the kids with the perfect storybook in hand, ready to read the kids epic stories of love, adventure, and friendship. And if we’re honest, those are the lessons we want to teach our kids growing up, are they not? Since he loves to read anyway, he won’t mind reading for the kids at bed time. He’ll be the guy who gets into the stories with the fake voices and really cares that the kids are absorbed by the story. You’ll be the woman standing in the hall laughing at your big, lovable lug because, let’s face it, that’s adorable.

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    5. He’ll be a more passionate lover

    Have you ever read a tastefully written sex scene in a novel? They’re descriptive but not overly so and some authors are very imaginative. In the worlds that he visits, people are passionate. As we said earlier, people who read a lot learn from the things that they read. That means when he reads a tasteful, yet passionate sex scene, he learns from it and that only means good things for you.

    6. He’s more patient

    Reading a book takes time. Busy men may stay on that same book for weeks until they finish. For others, they can chew through a few hundred pages in just a few hours. Whether it’s being patient enough to read the same book for a long time or sit down long enough to read a whole book in one go, men who read are more patient. Patience is a skill and it’s one that is honed over years of practice. Readers have more patience, which means he’ll be less likely to just up and leave you for no apparent reason. He’ll be patient enough to work out problems in the relationship and stick around. That’s a trait that’s dying quickly in the newer generations. You’ll be like one of his books, and I guarantee you’ll never see him throw away one of his books.

    7. He will teach you things

    As we’ve stated repeatedly, men who read know things. They’ve read a lot of words and those words contain lessons. Not all books they read are fantasy or drama novels. Sometimes they read how-tos. Not only do they like to read but they like to learn and that means there are probably a considerable number of things that they can teach you about life, love, and maybe even some practical things, like DIY home projects or possibly even your computer or smartphone. As Red Green always said, “If women don’t find you handsome, they should at least find you handy.”

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    8. You are guaranteed private time

    date a guy who reads

      Readers like to read. That sounds like a dumb statement but hear me out. When readers read they don’t like to be disturbed. They’re engaging with the words and painting pictures of vast landscapes and epic scenes in their head. When a man who reads sits down to read, you have time to yourself to do what you want. Take a bath, take a nap, go out shopping for a couple of hours, or do whatever it is you like to do. Book readers aren’t clingy, because if you don’t want to hang out, they have a place to go to chill to wait for you.

      9. He knows what romance is really about

      He’s read books that contain romance. Even fantasy novels crafted for young adult men have romances in them. In the books he reads, the hero and/or heroine and the people they love endure the worst. They endure battles and betrayal, separation and desperation. They stay together (most of the time) and their characters are shining beacons of inspiration for what romance really is. When you find a guy who reads, you’ve found a guy who has seen romance done the right way and that means soon you will too.

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      10. He knows how to take care of things

      Books are made of paper and paper is fragile. It can be destroyed by water, dirt, neglect, abuse, and even time itself. You can be sure that a man who reads knows how to take care of his things because he wants his books to live on so he can read them again. That means there will be coasters on the tables, things will be dusted and cleaned, and he’ll treat his and your stuff with respect. You’re not a thing, but these habits of not abusing or neglecting his treasures will translate into not abusing or neglecting you. That’s a win-win.

      Readers in general are better people for having read about other people who do good things. They have a good example of how they should act and who they should be. But beware: not every reader is like this even if the majority of them are. Not every turtle-neck-toting guy reading a book in a Starbucks is going to match the description on this list and we know that. However, most of them do, and when you find one you’ll see how awesome it can be to date a guy who reads.

      Featured photo credit: http://fc05.deviantart.net/fs70/i/2013/050/c/8/a_reader_lives_a_thousand_lives_before_he_dies____by_ninastarina-d5v6kac.png via DeviantArt

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      Joseph Hindy

      A writer, editor, and YouTuber who likes to share about technology and lifestyle tips.

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      Last Updated on October 14, 2020

      Had a Bad Day? 7 Ways to Rebound From It and Feel Good Again

      Had a Bad Day? 7 Ways to Rebound From It and Feel Good Again

      Today didn’t turn out as you planned, but it doesn’t mean you’re weak. It simply means that you’re human, and you’re not bad just because you had a bad day.

      “Not everyday is a good day but there is something good in every day.” -Alice Morse Earle

      It’s not the end of the world when you find yourself thinking “I had a bad day,” but it can feel like it. You may have had plans that fell apart, experiences that set you back, and interactions that only did harm.

      You may have started the day thinking you could take on it all, only to find you could hardly get out of bed. When you have a bad day, you can forget to look at the good.

      Sometimes, self-care helps us to remember why we are worth it. It helps us to recharge and reset our mindset. It helps us to know that there are still options and that the day isn’t over yet.

      Love yourself today, no matter how hard it’s been. That’s the way to find yourself amidst the hardships you have. That’s how you center yourself and regain focus and live a more meaningful life. Give yourself some credit and compassion.

      Here are 7 ways to rebound from a bad day using self-compassion as a tool. If you had a bad day, these are for you!

      1. Make a Gratitude List

      In a study on gratitude, psychologists Dr. Robert A Emmons and Dr. Michael E. McCullough conducted an experiment where one group of people wrote out gratitude lists for ten weeks while another group wrote about irritations. The study found that the group that wrote about gratitude reported more optimistic mindsets in their lives[1].

      Overall, having a gratitude list improved well-being and made one truly grateful by counting the blessings in their lives.

      Write a list of what you are grateful for if you had a bad day. Make it as long as you like, but also remember to note why you’re grateful for each thing you write.

      What has given you the most joy? What has set you up for better days? Keep a tally of triumphs in mind, especially when you do have the bad days.

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      The day doesn’t define you, and you still have things of value that surround you. These could be material things, spiritual connections and experiences, relationships, basic needs, emotional and mental well-being, physical health, progress towards hopes and dreams, or simply being alive.

      Here are some other simple ways to practice gratitude.

      2. Write in a Journal

      Journaling affects your overall mental health, which also affects physical health and aids in the management of stress, depression, anxiety, and more[2].

      All you need is a pen and paper, or you could do an online, password-protected journal such as Penzu. The key is to get started and not pressure yourself on how polished or perfect it is. You don’t need to have prior experience to start journal writing. Just start.

      Write out everything that is bothering you for 15 minutes. This helps with rumination, processing problems, and can even aid with brainstorming solutions.

      However you approach it, you can find patterns of thinking that no longer serve you and start to transform your overall mental state. This will impact all areas of your life and is a great coping skill.

      3. Meditate

      Meditation can help you overcome negative thought patterns, worrying about the future, dwelling on the past, or struggling to overcome a bad day[3]. It shifts your mentality and helps you focus on the present or any one thing you truly want to focus on.

      Here is an example of a meditation you can do:

      Get into a comfortable position. Close your eyes. Rest your body, release tension, and unclench your jaw. Tighten and release each muscle group in a body scan for progressive muscle relaxation.

      Focus on your breath, taking a few deep breaths. Let your belly expand when you breathe in for diaphragmatic breathing. Empty yourself completely of air, then return to normal breathing.

      Next, focus on the idea of self-love and let it erase negative thoughts. Think about the ways you’ve been judging yourself, with the narratives coming up that your mind may create.

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      Give yourself unconditional love and release judgment. Take your time meditating on this because you matter. This is particularly important if you had a bad day.

      Check out this article for more on how to get started with a meditation practice.

      4. Do Child’s Pose

      Yoga Outlet says:

      “Child’s Pose is a simple way to calm your mind, slow your breath, and restore a feeling of peace and safety. Practicing the pose before bedtime can help to release the worries of the day. Practicing in the morning can you help transition from sleeping to waking.”[4]

      When you do Child’s Pose, it can be between difficult positions in yoga, or it can be anytime you feel you need a rest. It helps you recover from difficulties and relax the mind.

      It also has the physical health benefits of elongating your back, opening your hips, and helping with digestion[5].

      To do Child’s Pose, rest your buttocks back on your feet, knees on the floor. Elongate your body over your knees with both arms extended or tucked back, with head and neck resting on the floor[6].

      Had a bad day? Try Child's Pose.

         

        Do this pose as a gift to yourself. You are allowing yourself to heal, rest, get time for yourself, recover, and recharge. When you’ve had a bad day, it’s there waiting for you.

        5. Try Positive Self-Talk

        Engage in positive self-talk. This is essentially choosing your thoughts.

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        When you have a negative thought, such as “I can’t do this,” replace it consciously with the thought “I can do this.” Give yourself positive affirmations to help with this.

        Negative self-talk fits into four general categories: personalizing or blaming yourself, magnifying or only focusing on the negative, catastrophizing or expecting the worst to happen, and polarizing or only seeing back and white[7].

        When you stop blaming yourself for everything and start focusing on the positive, expecting things to work out, and seeing the areas of grey in life, you reverse these negative mindsets and engage in positive self-talk.

        When you speak words of kindness to yourself, your brain responds with a more positive attitude. That attitude will affect everything you do. It’s how you take care of yourself if you had a bad day.

        Check in with yourself to know when you are having negative self-talk. Are you seeing patterns? When did they start to become a problem? Are you able to turn these thoughts around?

        6. Use Coping Skills and Take a Break

        Use your coping skills. This means not letting your thoughts take control of yourself.

        You can distract yourself and escape a bit. Do things you love. You can exercise, listen to music, dance, volunteer or help someone, be in nature, or read a book.

        It isn’t about repression. It’s about redirection. You can’t stay in thoughts that are no longer working for you.

        Sometimes, it’s okay to get out of your own way. Give yourself a break from the things going on in your head. You can always come back to a problem later. This may even help you figure out the best course of action as sometimes stepping away is the only way to see the solution.

        If you had a bad day, you may not feel like addressing what went wrong. You may need a break, so take one.

        7. If a Bad Day Turns Into Bad Days

        “I believe depression is legitimate. But I also believe that if you don’t exercise, eat nutritious food, get sunlight, get enough sleep, consume positive material, surround yourself with support, then you aren’t giving yourself a fighting chance.” –Jim Carrey

        If you’ve been feeling out of control, depressed, or unstable for more than a few weeks, it’s time to call a mental health professional. This is not because you have failed in any way. It’s because you are human, and you simply need help.

        You may not be able to quickly rebound from a bad day, and that’s fine. Feel what you feel, but don’t let it consume you.

        When you talk to a professional, share the techniques that you have already tried here and whether they were helpful. They may tell you additional ideas or gain insights from your struggles of not being able to rebound from a series of bad days.

        If you’re having more than just a bad day, they will want to know. If you don’t have the answers, that’s okay, too. You just need to try these tools and figure out how you’re feeling. That’s all that’s required of you.

        Keep taking care of yourself. Any progress is progress, no matter how small. Give yourself a chance to get better by reaching out.

        Final Thoughts

        If you had a bad day, don’t let it stop you.

        Know this: It’s okay not to be okay. You have a right to feel what you feel. But there is something you can do about it.

        You can invest in yourself via self-care.

        You are not alone in this. Everyone has bad days from time to time. You just need to know that you are the positive things you tell yourself.

        More Things You Can Do If You Had a Bad Day

        Featured photo credit: Anthony Tran via unsplash.com

        Reference

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