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Think Your Work Sucks? 7 Ways to Deal with It

Think Your Work Sucks? 7 Ways to Deal with It

Society as a whole is gradually becoming more open to the concept of seeking out work that you truly enjoy and embracing those opportunities but, for many, work sucks; it may be a place of dissatisfaction rather than one of pure joy.

This can be due to any number of reasons. Perhaps you are in a position solely for the money rather than for the work that you are doing on a daily basis. Maybe you are in an entry-level position that serves as a placeholder until you can get the job that you want. You may even be in a job simply because it was the only option available to you in the moment.

Regardless of why you are in a job you may not be in love with, the truth is that this position is going to remain your reality until you are able to carve another path for yourself.

Ultimately, it is up to you to shape your reality. Would you prefer to show up to work every day with a negative attitude or be present each day with a positive one?

If you have chosen the latter option, here are 7 ways that you can deal with your work situation and change the course of your professional outlook.

1. Figure out Where the Source of Discontent Is Coming From

A lot of people can say that they are not in love with their jobs but not a lot of people can truly tell you why they are unhappy in detail. The problem with this is that you may only be unhappy with a couple of things but, since you are choosing to say that you are unhappy with your job as a whole, you could be missing out on the wonderful parts of your position that make it worthwhile.

Take some time to sit down and hash out where this discontent is coming from. Are you unhappy with the amount of money you are making? Are there people in your workplace who are making your professional life miserable? Are you spending too much time getting to and from your workplace? Are you working too much and are able to properly take care of yourself and other aspects of your life?

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Whatever the issue may be, it is important to take note of these problems as this will help you determine where you are not satisfied in your job, and will give you something to work off of so that you don’t blame your job as a whole for your dissatisfaction. [1]

2. Focus on the Positive Aspects of Your Job

No matter how bleak your current outlook of your job is, the truth is that there are always positive aspects to every professional role, even if you have to look a little bit harder to find them.

These positives can be found in almost any part of the workday and it is up to you to frame them the right way so that you can look forward to them rather than dread them. Some positive aspects may include…

  • A long lunch break and several small breaks that give you time to re-energize.
  • Being close to your house so that you don’t have to stress about extensive travel in the mornings or evenings.
  • A larger salary that allows you to lead the lifestyle you want.
  • Positive employees who pump you up and make you feel ready to tackle the workday.
  • Being able to indirectly help people through the job or service that you are performing.

Although these examples may or may not apply to your own professional life, they serve as a reminder that you can always find great parts of your job if you are looking for them.

Once you find the parts that make you happy, make sure to focus on those throughout your work day to improve your mood and your overall take on work.

3. Discover a Greater Purpose in Your Job

A job is never just a job. Is a job a service that is performed so as to achieve a certain purpose for other people who are willing to pay for it. This means that whatever you are doing is helping someone else with their own needs and to help them improve their own quality of life.

That’s not to say that every job holds the same level of quality in terms of purpose but, your work does matter and it does contribute to something. If you are having trouble finding what this something is, consider the purpose of the company that you work with.

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Perhaps you work for a fast food establishment and you are not able to see your immediate impact based on your role. If this is the case, for example, you could choose to take a look at some of the impact your organization is making and frame it in such a way that your work is helping them to reach those goals.

Purpose allows people to feel more motivated and positive about going to work. There is always an underlying purpose to what it is you’re doing. Find it and work with that purpose in mind!

4. Make the Rest of Your Life More Enjoyable

If you are relatively unhappy with your life and you are going into a job each day that you don’t necessarily enjoy either, your move and your perspective on life isn’t going to improve any time soon. Remaining miserable with your life conditions is no way to live.

While you may not be able to change your situation, you are in control of your life and your attitude. You can make adjustments in your personal life that will help to make your work life more bearable.

Think about what it is that you want out of life and what you can do to increase your current quality of life. Are there goals that you want to reach? Are there things that you want to do more of that you haven’t been pursuing lately? More often than not, our professional life can shift our focus away from our personal lives and, we will lose track of fulfillment in this area.

Changing the way that you live your life can greatly improve your mindset towards your current work situation.[2]

5. Learn More About What You Would Like to Be Doing

People will often think about the fact that they would rather not be doing their jobs but, they don’t often think about what they would be doing instead. If you don’t like your job, it can be proactive to learn more about what your alternative career path would look like.

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If you weren’t working this job, what would your new and improved job look like? What would your position be? What responsibilities would you have? What impact would you make? How much money would you be making? Why would you want this job over your previous one and how it would it improve your current situation?

Don’t just fantasize about your current situation. Figure out what you would rather be doing so that you can take your first step towards a new life when the opportunity presents itself.

6. Create a Plan That Will Help You Reach Your New Career Goals

If you do have a better career path in mind and you simply need to get out of your job and into one that you would prefer, you will need to create a plan that you can work towards regularly — one that will be successful in landing you that new professional role.

Based on the questions you asked yourself in the previous point, find out what it will take to reach the career of your dreams. Do you need any further education to get there? Are there any requirements that you have to meet beforehand? What obstacles do you need to clear along the way?

Take a look at this guide and get more inspirations about how to set carer goals: How to Set Ambitious and Achievable Career Goals (With Examples)

Your plan will vary widely depending upon the difference between your dream job and your current position but, you will get there in time if you work towards these goals every day and take the necessary steps needed to make the transition seamless.

Figure out what you need to do, make a plan and a timeline, and crush your goals!

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7. Take Control of Your Work in the Meantime

Part of making your work suck less is learning the art of acceptance. You cannot change everything about your job overnight and, you need to accept that you will be in your current position until you are able to shift into a position that you truly enjoy.

However, this does not mean that you can’t make your current job more easily acceptable at the moment. Take control of the situation and take control of your work while you still have the job that you are in. Whether this means making the changes in the things you do not like (if you can) or taking control of the work that you are given, changes can be made to better suit your needs.

Get organized, grab your job by the horns, and guide it towards a better tomorrow. After all, this is your reality!

The Bottom Line

While your job cannot change at a moment’s notice, your outlook can and the most valuable tool you have at your disposal is yourself. Use that mighty brain to your advantage and cultivate a better mindset as you plan for the future that you want, rather than choosing to remain negative about your work life.

More Tips for Finding Fulfillment at Work

Featured photo credit: Helloquence via unsplash.com

Reference

[1] Jo Green Coaching: What to Do When Work Sucks
[2] The Art of Charm: What to Do When Your Job Sucks

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Dylan Buckley

Dylan is Lifehack's Motivation Expert specializing in self-development, with extensive experience working for life coaches and startups.

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Published on May 4, 2021

How To Spot Fake People (And Ways To Deal With Them)

How To Spot Fake People (And Ways To Deal With Them)

They say we are the average of the five persons we spend the most time with. For a minute, consider the people around you. Are they truly who your “tribe” should be or who you aspire to become in the future? Are they really genuine people who want to see you succeed? Or are they fake people who don’t really want to see you happy?

In this article, I’ll review why it is important to surround yourself with genuine individuals—the ones who care, bring something to our table, and first and foremost, who leave all fakeness behind.

How to Spot Fake People?

When you’ve been working in the helping professions for a while, spotting fake people gets a bit easier. There are some very clear signs that the person you are looking at is hiding something, acting somehow, or simply wanting to get somewhere. Most often, there is a secondary gain—perhaps attention, sympathy, or even a promotion.

Whatever it is, you’re better off working their true agenda and staying the hell away. Here are some things you should look out for to help spot fake people.

1. Full of Themselves

Fake people like to show off. They love looking at themselves in the mirror. They collect photos and videos of every single achievement they had and every part of their body and claim to be the “best at what they do.”

Most of these people are actually not that good in real life. But they act like they are and ensure that they appear better than the next person. The issue for you is that you may find yourself always feeling “beneath” them and irritated at their constant need to be in the spotlight.

2. Murky in Expressing Their Emotions

Have you ever tried having a deep and meaningful conversation with a fake person? It’s almost impossible. It’s because they have limited emotional intelligence and don’t know how they truly feel deep down—and partly because they don’t want to have their true emotions exposed, no matter how normal these might be.

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It’s much harder to say “I’m the best at what I do” while simultaneously sharing “average” emotions with “equal” people.

3. Zero Self-Reflection

To grow, we must accept feedback from others. We must be open to our strengths and to our weaknesses. We must accept that we all come in different shapes and can always improve.

Self-reflection requires us to think, forgive, admit fault, and learn from our mistakes. But to do that, we have to be able to adopt a level of genuineness and depth that fake people don’t routinely have. A fake person generally never apologizes, but when they do, it is often followed with a “but” in the next breath.

4. Unrealistic Perceptions

Fake people most often have an unrealistic perception of the world—things that they want to portray to others (pseudo achievements, materialistic gains, or a made-up sense of happiness) or simply how they genuinely regard life outside themselves.

A lot of fake people hide pain, shame, and other underlying reasons in their behavior. This could explain why they can’t be authentic and/or have difficulties seeing their environment for the way it objectively is (both good and bad).

5. Love Attention

As I mentioned earlier, the biggest sign that something isn’t quite right with someone’s behavior can be established by how much they love attention. Are you being interrupted every time you speak by someone who wants to make sure that the spotlight gets reverted back to them? Is the focus always on them, no matter the topic? If yes, you’re probably dealing with a fake person.

6. People Pleaser

Appreciation feels nice but having everyone like you is even better. While it is completely unrealistic for most people to please everyone all the time, fake people seem to always say yes in pursuit of constant approval.

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Now, this is a problem for two reasons. Firstly, these people are simply saying yes to things for their own satisfaction. Secondly, they often end up changing their minds or retracting their offer for one reason or another (“I would have loved to, but my grandmother suddenly fell ill.”), leaving you in the lurch for the 100th time this year.

7. Sarcasm and Cynicism

Behind the chronic pasted smile, fake people are well known for brewing resentment, jealousy, or anger. This is because, behind the postcard life, they are often unhappy. Sarcasm and cynicism are well known to act as a defense mechanism, sometimes even a diversion—anything so they can remain feeling on top of the world, whether it is through boosting themselves or bringing people down.

8. Crappy friend

Fake people are bad friends. They don’t listen to you, your feelings, and whatever news you might have to share. In fact, you might find yourself migrating away from them when you have exciting or bad news to share, knowing that it will always end up one way—their way. In addition, you might find that they’re not available when you truly need them or worse, cancel plans at the last minute.

It’s not unusual to hear that a fake person talks constantly behind people’s backs. Let’s be honest, if they do it to others, they’re doing it to you too. If your “friend” makes you feel bad constantly, trust me, they’re not achieving their purpose, and they’re simply not a good person to have around.

The sooner you learn to spot these fake people, the sooner you can meet meaningful individuals again.

How to Cope With Fake People Moving Forward?

It is important to remind yourself that you deserve more than what you’re getting. You are worthy, valuable, precious, and just as important as the next person.

There are many ways to manage fake people. Here are some tips on how to deal with them.

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1. Boundaries

Keep your boundaries very clear. As explained in the book Unlock Your Resilience, boundaries are what keep you sane when the world tries to suffocate you. When fake people become emotional vampires, make sure to keep your distances, limit contact, and simply replace them with more valuable interactions.

2. Don’t Take Their Behavior Personally

Sadly, they most likely have behaved this way before they knew you and will continue much longer after you have moved on. It isn’t about you. It is about their inner need to meet a void that you are not responsible for. And in all honesty, unless you are a trained professional, you are unlikely to improve it anyway.

3. Be Upfront and Honest About How You Feel

If your “friend” has been hurtful or engaged in behaviors you struggle with, let them know—nicely, firmly, however you want, but let them know that they are affecting you. If it works, great. If it doesn’t, you’ll feel better and when you’re ready to move on, you’ll know you tried to reach out. Your conscience is clear.

4. Ask for Advice

If you’re unsure about what you’re seeing or feeling, ask for advice. Perhaps a relative, a good friend, or a colleague might have some input as to whether you are overreacting or seeing some genuine concerns.

Now, don’t confuse asking for advice with gossiping behind the fake person’s back because, in the end, you don’t want to stoop down to their level. However, a little reminder as to how to stay on your own wellness track can never hurt.

5. Dig Deeper

Now, this one, I offer with caution. If you are emotionally strong, up to it, guaranteed you won’t get sucked into it, and have the skills to manage, perhaps you could dig into the reasons a fake person is acting the way they do.

Have they suffered recent trauma? Have they been rejected all their lives? Is their self-esteem so low that they must resort to making themselves feel good in any way they can? Sometimes, having an understanding of a person’s behavior can help in processing it.

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6. Practice Self-Care!

Clearly, putting some distance between the fake person and yourself is probably the way to go. However, sometimes, it takes time to get there. In the meantime, make sure to practice self-care, be gentle with yourself, and compensate with lots of positives!

Self-care can be as simple as taking a hot shower after talking to them or declining an invitation when you’re not feeling up to the challenge.

Spotting fake people isn’t too hard. They generally glow with wanna-be vibes. However, most often, there are reasons as to why they are like this. Calling their behavior might be the first step. Providing them with support might be the second. But if these don’t work, it’s time to stay away and surround yourself with the positivity that you deserve.

Final Thoughts

Remember that life is a rollercoaster. It has good moments, tough moments, and moments you wouldn’t change for the world. So, look around and make sure that you take the time to choose the right people to share it all with.

We are the average of the five people we spend the most time with, so take a good look around and choose wisely!

More Tips on Dealing With Fake People

Featured photo credit: Priscilla Du Preez via unsplash.com

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