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Everything Is Neutral, Whether It’s Good Or Bad Is Attached To What You Think

Everything Is Neutral, Whether It’s Good Or Bad Is Attached To What You Think

‘Is the glass half empty or half full?’ is a common example showing that sometimes what matters the most is usually how we perceive events and objects instead of what actually happens. If it rains on a holiday, you can either think it is bad because it ruins your day or you can think it is good because you can do something different. This wisdom will make your life much happier and less stressful.

Worrying Never Fixes Anything

Sometimes we just worry too much. In fact, worrying never fixes anything or it may even make things worse.

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Imagine you woke up late but you had a flight to catch. What’d be the first thing that popped up in your mind? Feeling a bit nervous and a bit worried is normal but if you keep worrying about it, you can never get anything done. Whenever you feel worried, the first thing to do is to ask yourself if there’s anything you can do about it. Say for that flight, if there’s still some time left before the flight departs, you’d better get going. But if it is impossible to catch it, you’d better come up with a Plan B.

Think about the times you spent on worrying, those are times wasted. There’s so much you could have done instead. Worrying solves nothing but only makes the possible impossible.

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Only The End Of The World Is The End Of The World

You should bear in mind that only the end of the world is the end of world. Not because the sun still rises and sets despite things happen, but because what upsets you is not the event but your belief. You think it is the end of the world because everything sucks but in fact you are the only one who holds this view.

If you break up with someone whom you think is the love of your life, you may have the feeling that the world is ending. But listen to what people around you say about this, their words maybe harsh to you but they maybe speaking the truth. They’re looking at the same thing from a different perspective. They may believe that you deserve a better person, or they may think that it is not really that bad. What controls your emotion is the belief you have in your mind.

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Pain Is Only Temporary

Everybody has their ups and downs because that is exactly what keeps people alive. Inevitably there are some moments we may feel painful, and there is nothing wrong to feel the pain.

What we need to know is, pain is only temporary and you have a choice. You can either choose to be indulged in the feeling of sorrow or choose to overcome it. Like if you cut your finger, it is painful because it is the natural reaction of our bodies. It is the pain. But suffering is optional, you can end this pain by applying a bandage or going to the doctor. It takes time for wounds to heal but eventually it will. Look back to what you have been through in life, you know the bad days will pass someday. It is just a matter of time.

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Happiness may be something that most of the people have been chasing for throughout their lives. It can be simple, depending on how you perceive things. What controls your mind controls your life.

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Sheba Leung

Translator. Sport lover. Traveler.

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Last Updated on October 16, 2019

5 Powerful Ways for Building Fulfilling Relationships

5 Powerful Ways for Building Fulfilling Relationships

We all have relationships. We have acquaintances, relatives, colleagues, neighbors and friends. However, for a large percentage of us, many of these relationships are not fulfilling.

They are unfulfilling because they lack real strength; and they lack real strength because they lack real depth.

Unfortunately, in today’s society, we tend to have shallow, superficial relationships with others, and it’s extremely hard for this kind of relationships to provide anything more than faint satisfaction.

I’d like to show you, based on my experience as a communication and confidence coach, how you can add a significant amount of depth, and thus strength, to your relationships and make your social life a whole lot more meaningful.

Here’re 5 simple yet powerful ways for meaningful relationships building:

1. Meet More People

This is an apparent paradox, but the quality of the people you meet has considerably to do with the quantity of people you meet.

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If you don’t know a lot of people and you barely meet one or two new people every season of the year, considering the variety of individuals out there, you won’t meet very often people who are a good match with you in terms of personality, interests and values.

And since this natural match plays a huge part in building strong relationships, you’ll just as seldom have the opportunity to develop strong relationships.

Conversely, if you go out a lot, you meet a lot of new people and you constantly expand your social circle, you’re much more likely to meet people you match up well with, and these people have a tremendous potential to become good friends, reliable partners, etc.

This is why it’s important to meet more people.

2. Talk about the Things That Matter To You

A relationship becomes the strongest when two people discover they believe in the same things and have similar interests. It’s these commonalities regarding values and interests that create the strongest emotional connection.

I’ve noticed that many people keep conversations shallow. They talk about trivial stuff such as the weather, what’s on TV, the lives of various movie stars, but they rarely talk about what really matters to them in life. This is a mistake from my perspective, because it’s the perfect method for a relationship to not develop.

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Talk about the things that truly matter to you and give others a chance to know what you care about and what you believe in. If they believe in the same things and they care about the same things, they’ll eagerly let you know. Thus you’ll find meaningful common ground and you’ll feel more connected.

3. Express Vulnerability

Many people try to come off as perfect. They don’t talk about their failures, they hide their shortcomings and they never say anything that could embarrass them.

This is all just a facade though. You may appear perfect to some, but you know you’re not perfect and they know that too. You’re only human and humans have flaws.

However, by hiding your flaws, what you do succeed in is appearing cold and impersonal. You seem like a marble statue rather than a real person. And this makes it very hard for anyone to connect with you emotionally.

Humans connect with other humans, not with ideals. Keep this in mind and don’t be afraid to let your vulnerability and your humanity show. This is what takes a relationship to the next level.

Take a look at this article and find out Why Showing Vulnerability Actually Proves Your Strength.

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4. Have Integrity

Integrity, as I see it, is the alignment between your thoughts, your words and your actions. When you say what you think and you do what you said you’ll do, you have integrity.

This is a crucial trait because if you have integrity, people can trust you. They can trust you to give them an honest feedback, even when it’s hard to shallow, and they can trust you to keep your promises.

This trust is one of the central pillars of a strong relationship, both in your personal and your professional life. So, as challenging as it can be sometimes, always try to have integrity.

Be honest with the people around you, even when this will initially hurt them. It’s more important for them to trust you than to not feel hurt. And always do what you promised. Even better, think twice before you promise anything, and only promise what you really can and you are willing to do.

5. Be There for Others

Another central pillar of strong relationships is support. Connections between people grow sturdy if they can rely on each other for support when it’s needed, whether that support means a few kind words or several massive actions.

Of course, you can’t be there for everybody, all the time. Your time, energy and other resources are limited. But what you can do is identify the genuinely important people in your life and then seek to be there as much as possible, at least for them.

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Your support will help them practically, and it will comfort them emotionally; which makes one hell of a difference in a relationship.

The Bottom Line

With the right mindset and the right behavior, you can strengthen a wide range of relationships in your life and advance them as far as they can be advanced.

And with strong relationships, not only that you feel more fulfilled, but you feel more connected to the entire world. You feel that your life has real value, you have more fun and you live in the moment. An entire world of opportunities opens up in front of you.

Then your task is to simply walk through the open doors.

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Featured photo credit: Proxyclick Visitor Management System via unsplash.com

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