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7 Important Things You Have To Start Doing In The Coming Year

7 Important Things You Have To Start Doing In The Coming Year

It seems only yesterday when Pokemon Go was just released; when the Olympics has just started in Rio, when Leonardo DiCaprio, against all odds, has finally won his first Oscar Award. Yet without us realizing, time has flown by without leaving so much as a hint, and once again, we are left with unfulfilled goals and resolutions, questioning what we could have done better this year.

Nonetheless, crying over spilt milk is but a pointless endeavor. As Philip James Bailey put it beautifully in his poem, “We live in deeds, not years; in thoughts, not breaths; In feelings, not in figures on a dial.” It is crucial that we understand that we should set out to achieve something in our limited time, or we might as well not do anything at all. If you are still undecided on what you want to achieve in this new year, you might want to take a look at the following ideas!

1. Focus on your family, your friends instead of your phone.

How much time has passed since you peered down to that glimmering, colourful layer of glass? How long has it been since you take a proper look at your father as he slowly hobbles across the garden, instead of walking straight and brisk as he has always done? When is the last time you took your significant other on a date, without replying to those seemingly endless amount of texts?

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Perhaps it is time. Time to put the phone down, give your mother a hand as she prepares dinner, laugh along with your friends and give your kids a hug and your wife a kiss.

2. Leave or set clear boundaries for the toxic people and manipulators around you.

We have probably all been guilt-tripped before, coerced by the dejected tone of lines like this: “Oh sure, go ahead, I’ll just cope with this all by myself. It’s not like I comforted you two years ago for a whole month after your breakup.” We are aware of how these people always seem to have a problem with everything, blaming the world for not giving them what they want. Then they frame it in a way where you are the only person who would see the truth together with them and support each other.

These people are toxic, because they never see past themselves. They devour your attention and care, leaving you with little energy to care and fend for yourselves. Take the initiative and cut them from your life. If they are close to you, then set up clear boundaries to specify what kind of behavior you would tolerate.

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3. Pack for a trip and travel alone.

Staying in a place for too long turns a person stagnant. Our ideas, mindset become compressed into the small box we call “home”. The benefits travelling offer are enormous – but most importantly, to travel is to escape from the familiar, and acquire new eyes and perspectives. It is to see the same things in a different light, and provoke curiosity even upon seeing the most mundane things. Once we have seen different cultures, practices and people, it frees us of the mould we have fitted ourselves into and makes us a better person.

4. Spend time with people who are there for you.

How many ups and downs have you experienced this year? How many times have you been thankful for having a shoulder to lean on, or someone to hold you and tell you “it’s okay”?

Human beings may be social creatures and have higher intelligence than other animals, yet even we do not offer our help and care to everyone. Therefore, cherish the ones who made time for you, took care of you, and treated you with love and make time for them as well. After all, if they supported you at your worst – they deserve you at your best.

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5. Face your negativities and let them go.

From a tender young age, we were taught to suppress our negative emotions – namely anger, envy, fear, sorrow, and so on. We were told that showing these emotions present a side that people dislike.

However, for many of us who watched Inside Out, it might be easier to comprehend that we need a balance of emotions for us to function normally as human beings. One can only be peaceful with oneself when he/she understands the roots of his/her negativities – and allow them to dissipate in the wind.

6. Pay close attention to your goals.

Too many of us enjoy the thrill of writing down new goals but fail to follow up on them one that period of determination has passed. As a result, plans are never achieved, diets never completed, gym time never increased.

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But not all hope is lost! The trick is to make these goals reachable, and ensure you are motivated to complete them every day. By breaking down your goals into small and achievable tasks, setting due dates and rewarding yourself for each completed task, and measuring your overall progress, you are on a one-way highway towards accomplishing your goals!

7. Focus on yourself.

There is nothing more important than living for yourself. To quote Dr. Seuss, “Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one in you life that’s more important than your own self. Live because you are a miracle for yourself, and for others. Live for your wellbeing, your happiness, and stop comparing your life with others.

A new year has come. But it does not have to be the same as the last one – get up, get out, and get moving!

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Eamon Suen

Student, The Hong Kong University of Science and Technology

Life Is Not Supposed To Be Fair, We’re Supposed to Learn To Live With It If You Want To Be Successful, You May Need To Cut Off Something From Life The Earlier You Understand These Truths Of Happiness The Better Your New Habits Will Stick With These 5 Killer Strategies Accept Where You Are And Happiness Is At Your Fingertips

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Last Updated on February 15, 2019

Why Is Goal Setting Important to a Truly Fulfilling Life?

Why Is Goal Setting Important to a Truly Fulfilling Life?

In Personal Development-speak, we are always talking about goals, outcomes, success, desires and dreams. In other words, all the stuff we want to do, achieve and create in our world.

And while it’s important for us to know what we want to achieve (our goal), it’s also important for us to understand why we want to achieve it; the reason behind the goal or some would say, our real goal.

Why is goal setting important?

1. Your needs and desire will be fulfilled.

Sometimes when we explore our “why”, (why we want to achieve a certain thing) we realize that our “what” (our goal) might not actually deliver us the thing (feeling, emotion, internal state) we’re really seeking.

For example, the person who has a goal to lose weight in the belief that weight loss will bring them happiness, security, fulfillment, attention, popularity and the partner of their dreams. In this instance, their “what” is weight-loss and their “why” is happiness (etc.) and a partner.

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Six months later, they have lost the weight (achieved their goal) but as is often the case, they’re not happier, not more secure, not more confident, not more fulfilled and in keeping with their miserable state, they have failed to attract their dream partner.

After all, who wants to be with someone who’s miserable? They achieved their practical goal but still failed to have their needs met.

So they set a goal to lose another ten pounds. And then another. And maybe just ten more. With the destructive and erroneous belief that if they can get thin enough, they’ll find their own personal nirvana. And we all know how that story ends.

2. You’ll find out what truly motivates you

The important thing in the process of constructing our best life is not necessarily what goals we set (what we think we want) but what motivates us towards those goals (what we really want).

The sooner we begin to explore, identify and understand what motivates us towards certain achievements, acquisitions or outcomes (that is, we begin moving towards greater consciousness and self awareness), the sooner we will make better decisions for our life, set more intelligent (and dare I say, enlightened) goals and experience more fulfilment and less frustration.

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We all know people who have achieved what they set out to, only to end up in the same place or worse (emotionally, psychologically, sociologically) because what they were chasing wasn’t really what they were needing.

What we think we want will rarely provide us with what we actually need.

3. Your state of mind will be a lot healthier

We all set specific goals to achieve/acquire certain things (a job, a car, a partner, a better body, a bank balance, a title, a victory) because at some level, most of us believe (consciously or not) that the achievement of those goals will bring us what we really seek; joy, fulfilment, happiness, safety, peace, recognition, love, acceptance, respect, connection.

Of course, setting practical, material and financial goals is an intelligent thing to do considering the world we live in and how that world works.

But setting goals with an expectation that the achievement of certain things in our external, physical world will automatically create an internal state of peace, contentment, joy and total happiness is an unhealthy and unrealistic mindset to inhabit.

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What you truly want and need

Sometimes we need to look beyond the obvious (superficial) goals to discover and secure what we really want.

Sadly, we live in a collective mindset which teaches that the prettiest and the wealthiest are the most successful.

Some self-help frauds even teach this message. If you’re rich or pretty, you’re happy. If you’re both, you’re very happy. Pretty isn’t what we really want; it’s what we believe pretty will bring us. Same goes with money.

When we cut through the hype, the jargon and the self-help mumbo jumbo, we all have the same basic goals, desires and needs:

Joy, fulfilment, happiness, safety, peace, recognition, love, acceptance, respect, connection.

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Nobody needs a mansion or a sport’s car but we all need love.

Nobody needs massive pecs, six percent body-fat, a face lift or bigger breasts but we all need connection, acceptance and understanding.

Nobody needs to be famous but we all need peace, calm, balance and happiness.

The problem is, we live in a culture which teaches that one equals the other. If only we lived in a culture which taught that real success is far more about what’s happening in our internal environment, than our external one.

It’s a commonly-held belief that we’re all very different and we all have different goals — whether short term or long term goals. But in many ways we’re not, and we don’t; we all want essentially the same things.

Now all you have to do is see past the fraud and deception and find the right path.

Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

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