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The Hardest Truth People Learn That Makes Them Much More Successful Than The Others

The Hardest Truth People Learn That Makes Them Much More Successful Than The Others

Do you sometimes wonder why some people are much more successful than the others? Are they really more intelligent? Is it something to do with inborn talents? Or is it all a matter of luck?

Most of us know people who seem to lead much better lives than us. They seem to have it so much easier. As if success was just handed to them on a silver platter for them to enjoy. We admire and are often jealous of such acquaintances and colleagues.

The question is, what is it about them that makes them so different and more prone to success? The answer is quite simple. The problem isn’t with them. It’s with us.

And The Hardest Truth Is This:

The hardest truth that we need to know is this: everybody, and yes EVERYBODY sucks at the beginning. And here’s what most people do: they try a little bit, stumble and just give up way too soon. Only those who persist and persevere at all costs are the successful ones.

As this Quora user [1] points out:

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Your first 100 blog posts will suck.

Your first 5 books will suck.

Your first 30 talks in public will suck.

Your first 50 paintings will suck.

Your first 100 songs will suck.

Your first 40 YouTube videos will suck.

Yes, I made all of those numbers up.

And it doesn’t matter.

What matters is to understand that you’ll suck at everything in the beginning.

Just like I suck at everything in the beginning.

Just like everybody else sucks at everything in the beginning.

It all takes time. And persistence. And patience.

Most people rush through life. So they don’t have enough time.

Most people believe in overnight success. So they just stop when it doesn’t happen over night.

Most people get everything they want right away. So if they don’t, they just want something else.

So most people just give up.

And everything sucks..

This Is What You Gotta Do

So there you have it. The secret of life. If you want to be good at something, practice, practice and practice. Do whatever it takes to get there. At first you’re going to stumble, perhaps even injure yourself really bad and almost give up. And that is the crucial moment where you have to decide: do you want to go back to your normal life and remain a failure? Or do you want to try again, fail a little and keep trying till you get there?

Let’s say you’re a writer. Your first novel might not sell well but that doesn’t mean you should go back to a 9 to 5 job that sucks out all your creativity. Even when the rejection letters keep piling, you know you have a long road ahead. If you’re an athelete and you’ve lost miserably in a championship, it means that you’re destined for success- all you have to do is to put in more effort. If you’re a graphic designer and you aren’t getting enough clients- it means you have to be grateful for how far you’ve come and dive deeper into your work and produce more outstanding stuff. Whatever you do, don’t stop trying and don’t stop believing.

And Here Are The Famous People Who Failed

Do you want real life examples  [2] ? Oprah Winfrey was fired from her first TV job as an anchor and now she’s a billionaire with her own TV show. Steven Spielberg was rejected TWICE by the University of Southern California’s School of Cinematic Arts. Walt Disney was told by his newspaper editor that he ‘lacked imagination and had no good ideas’. And Stephen King’s first book Carrie was rejected 30 times before it saw light of day and spawned a franchise.

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So wherever you are and whatever you do, remember this: if you want to be successful, you’re going to suck A LOT at first, but don’t let failure get you down.

Featured photo credit: Ed Gregory via stokpic.com

Reference

[1]Quora: What is the hardest truth you had to accept that made you stronger
[2]http://www.lifehack.org/articles/productivity/15-highly-successful-people-who-failed-their-way-success.html

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The Gentle Art of Saying No

The Gentle Art of Saying No

No!

It’s a simple fact that you can never be productive if you take on too many commitments — you simply spread yourself too thin and will not be able to get anything done, at least not well or on time.

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But requests for your time are coming in all the time — through phone, email, IM or in person. To stay productive, and minimize stress, you have to learn the Gentle Art of Saying No — an art that many people have problems with.

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What’s so hard about saying no? Well, to start with, it can hurt, anger or disappoint the person you’re saying “no” to, and that’s not usually a fun task. Second, if you hope to work with that person in the future, you’ll want to continue to have a good relationship with that person, and saying “no” in the wrong way can jeopardize that.

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But it doesn’t have to be difficult or hard on your relationship. Here are the Top 10 tips for learning the Gentle Art of Saying No:

  1. Value your time. Know your commitments, and how valuable your precious time is. Then, when someone asks you to dedicate some of your time to a new commitment, you’ll know that you simply cannot do it. And tell them that: “I just can’t right now … my plate is overloaded as it is.”
  2. Know your priorities. Even if you do have some extra time (which for many of us is rare), is this new commitment really the way you want to spend that time? For myself, I know that more commitments means less time with my wife and kids, who are more important to me than anything.
  3. Practice saying no. Practice makes perfect. Saying “no” as often as you can is a great way to get better at it and more comfortable with saying the word. And sometimes, repeating the word is the only way to get a message through to extremely persistent people. When they keep insisting, just keep saying no. Eventually, they’ll get the message.
  4. Don’t apologize. A common way to start out is “I’m sorry but …” as people think that it sounds more polite. While politeness is important, apologizing just makes it sound weaker. You need to be firm, and unapologetic about guarding your time.
  5. Stop being nice. Again, it’s important to be polite, but being nice by saying yes all the time only hurts you. When you make it easy for people to grab your time (or money), they will continue to do it. But if you erect a wall, they will look for easier targets. Show them that your time is well guarded by being firm and turning down as many requests (that are not on your top priority list) as possible.
  6. Say no to your boss. Sometimes we feel that we have to say yes to our boss — they’re our boss, right? And if we say “no” then we look like we can’t handle the work — at least, that’s the common reasoning. But in fact, it’s the opposite — explain to your boss that by taking on too many commitments, you are weakening your productivity and jeopardizing your existing commitments. If your boss insists that you take on the project, go over your project or task list and ask him/her to re-prioritize, explaining that there’s only so much you can take on at one time.
  7. Pre-empting. It’s often much easier to pre-empt requests than to say “no” to them after the request has been made. If you know that requests are likely to be made, perhaps in a meeting, just say to everyone as soon as you come into the meeting, “Look guys, just to let you know, my week is booked full with some urgent projects and I won’t be able to take on any new requests.”
  8. Get back to you. Instead of providing an answer then and there, it’s often better to tell the person you’ll give their request some thought and get back to them. This will allow you to give it some consideration, and check your commitments and priorities. Then, if you can’t take on the request, simply tell them: “After giving this some thought, and checking my commitments, I won’t be able to accommodate the request at this time.” At least you gave it some consideration.
  9. Maybe later. If this is an option that you’d like to keep open, instead of just shutting the door on the person, it’s often better to just say, “This sounds like an interesting opportunity, but I just don’t have the time at the moment. Perhaps you could check back with me in [give a time frame].” Next time, when they check back with you, you might have some free time on your hands.
  10. It’s not you, it’s me. This classic dating rejection can work in other situations. Don’t be insincere about it, though. Often the person or project is a good one, but it’s just not right for you, at least not at this time. Simply say so — you can compliment the idea, the project, the person, the organization … but say that it’s not the right fit, or it’s not what you’re looking for at this time. Only say this if it’s true — people can sense insincerity.

Featured photo credit: Pexels via pexels.com

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