Advertising
Advertising

Going Man – A Short Guide To Your Ultimate Man Cave

Going Man – A Short Guide To Your Ultimate Man Cave

Modern life is a massive battlefield. Seriously. The only difference between these and some more savage, albeit a lot simpler times, is that we no longer ride off into battle to protect our possessions on a mighty steed. Current battles are fought with mortgages, loans, debit cards, and other far less noble-sounding necessary evils. Is life, at least, easier now?

Physically? Probably. Mentally? Not even remotely.

The outcome, however, is just the same. A true warrior-king needs a stronghold where he can recover from wounds and enjoy good old venison, wine, and lutes. A real modern man needs a cave where he can take a short break from outside life and indulge himself a bit.

But, we have to agree that “true man” is a term so broad that it threatens to level us all to the same measures with the subtlety of a steamroller. Let us then take a look at a few different ideas for different warrior-kings of the 21st century.

1. Entrepreneur’s Man Cave

    An entrepreneur’s lifestyle has a fair share of both pros and cons. One of the things we know the most about entrepreneurs, unfortunately, belongs to the latter group of characteristics – their work time is never truly over.

    Advertising

    That is why an entrepreneur’s man cave should be less of a pleasure room and more of a place where they can retire and enjoy their hobbies while still being able to get the job done. What does that mean? A comfortable chair, wall-mounted TV,[1] spacious desk, sofa, and of course, an “executive” mini bar fridge to soothe the tired soul.

    2. Movie-goer’s Man Cave

      Image Credit: jeff beyers

      Every avid movie-goer knows how poor the theater experience can be these days. Cellphones, obnoxious people who can’t stop talking, and the mind-numbing sound of someone chewing popcorn. The answer to this problem is very obvious – build yourself a home theater.

      All you need is a good projector,[2] loudspeaker system (you can get away with 5.1, but try going for 7.1), and a few comfortable recliners[3] (Chandler and Joey-style). Details like movie props, posters, or standees can only make the whole experience more special.

      3. Rockstar’s Man Cave

        If you are, on the other hand, more into music, you can turn your man cave into a small private venue where you can jam with your friends. So, in addition to everything we have come to expect in a man cave by now, it would be a good idea to throw some studio equipment[4] into the equation as well.

        Keep in mind, though, that your neighbors may not share the same passion for music as you. Soundproof your cave so you don’t annoy them. Small, genre-centric details (e.g. rockabilly, 80s pop, heavy metal) are always a welcome addition.

        Advertising

        4. Sportsman’s Man Cave

        There are very few of us who haven’t been, at least few times in life, touched by a sports fever. How does this fever work? You start watching the games, and the more you watch them, more you want to train. The more you train, more you want to watch the games.

        How to stop this fever? Why would you? Instead, decorate one of your rooms with jerseys, trophies, and sports memorabilia. Then move in a huge TV, even bigger couch, and a fridge. Finally, throw in some basic gym equipment[5] (dumbbells, bars, and treadmill) to you satisfy the other side of your inner sports devotee while you are waiting for the next game.

        5. Gentleman’s Man Cave

          Or in other words, a room for the ones with the more refined habits. What does that mean? Out with technology, in with good taste. A proper gentleman’s man cave should feature only a comfortable chair, small table (stylish and timeless pieces are highly preferable), a few wine racks, bookcases, and of course, an espresso machine.

          Remember, you are going for quality, not quantity. If you like to listen to music, move in a gramophone. They feature a large amount of eye-candy, and their sound simply can’t be replaced. Install layered lighting,[6] and you will score a huge design point.

          6. Gamer’s Man Cave

          Advertising


            Let’s say everyone who considers himself a serious gamer already owns a powerful enough PC, extremely comfortable chair, loudspeakers (or headphones), and three-monitor setup. What’s missing to make this promising foundation into a man cave? Well, if you are old enough to actually make a man cave, you were probably growing up in the late ‘90s or early 2000s, so you know online multiplayer can’t hold a candle to local mayhem.

            Now, bring in more of the same, make some room for your friends, pull the cables through the floor and the walls[7] so you don’t trip over them, and your LAN den will be ready to go.

            7. Fantasy Man Cave

            A room for all of us who wander but aren’t lost. Now, pulling off a fantasy-based man cave is somewhat tricky to do, because you have to incorporate a love for books, games, and movies all into one room. Look to the previous paragraphs for help. However, once you are done with boring technicalities, you’ll finally get the chance to populate the room with swords, flags, tapestries, and all sorts of Tolkien-inspired no-goods.[8]

            The things you don’t want to miss are a comfortable rocking chair, and a substantial, Warhammer-friendly wooden table. Hidden doors (bookcase does seem like an excellent cover) are not necessary, but they are a very cool addition.

            8. Traditional Man Cave

              Image Credit: Elizabeth Anderson

              Essentially, a traditional man cave is a room that fits various tastes, but it’s slave to none of them; sort of the first thing that pops into your mind when you put the words “man” and “cave” together. So, what have you imagined? Okay, the usual suspects like the cozy sofa, huge TV, large fridge, and loudspeakers. But what else?

              That’s right, the things like mini bar, billiard table, dart board, even the old-school arcade games. In other words, a traditional man cave should convey a very strong pub-like impression. Does that make pub the man’s lowest common denominator? Why not.

              Advertising

              The modern world is full of twist and turns. Granted, our lives are better than they were a couple of centuries ago, and we know much more ways to have fun than our ancestors did. What we sorely lack is time to have that fun and a place where we won’t be distracted.

              Should we then simply give up and surrender to a daily rut? No, we have to carve ourselves a place where we’ll be happy. Do you feel your life is not as awesome as you would like it to be?

              Then give yourself the best man cave ever.

              Featured photo credit: Elizabeth Anderson via flickr.com

              Reference

              More by this author

              Dejan Kvrgic

              Blogger, Writer

              Haircare 101: Hairstyling Tricks for Both Men and Women 30 Excellent Slow Cooker Recipes For Lazy People 5 Things You Must Know to Find the Best Headphones Bedroom Makeover 101: Enhancing The Most Important Place In Your Home 8 Fun Ways to Make Your Wedding Truly Memorable

              Trending in Lifestyle

              1 How to Control Your Thoughts and Be the Master of Your Mind 2 Why You’re Feeling Tired All the Time (And What to Do About It) 3 10 Powerful Ways to Stop Worrying and Start Living Today 4 Becoming Self-Taught (The How-To Guide) 5 12 Best Foods That Improve Memory and Brain Health

              Read Next

              Advertising
              Advertising
              Advertising

              Last Updated on August 20, 2019

              How to Control Your Thoughts and Be the Master of Your Mind

              How to Control Your Thoughts and Be the Master of Your Mind

              Your mind is the most powerful tool you have for the creation of good in your life, but if not used correctly, can also be the most destructive force in your life.

              Your mind, more specifically, your thoughts, affect your perception and therefore, your interpretation of reality. (And here’s Why Your Perception Is Your Reality.)

              I have heard that the average person thinks around 70,000 thoughts a day. That’s a lot, especially if they are unproductive, self-abusive and just a general waste of energy.

              You can let your thoughts run amok, but why would you? It is your mind, your thoughts; isn’t it time to take your power back? Isn’t it time to take control?

              Choose to be the person who is actively, consciously thinking your thoughts. Become the master of your mind.

              When you change your thoughts, you will change your feelings as well, and you will also eliminate the triggers that set off those feelings. Both of these outcomes provide you with a greater level of peace in your mind.

              I currently have few thoughts that are not of my own choosing or a response from my reprogramming. I am the master of my mind, so now my mind is quite peaceful. Yours can be too!

              Who Is Thinking My Thoughts?

              Before you can become the master of your mind, you must recognize that you are currently at the mercy of several unwanted “squatters” living in your mind, and they are in charge of your thoughts. If you want to be the boss of them, you must know who they are and what their motivation is, and then you can take charge and evict them.

              Here are four of the “squatters” in your head that create the most unhealthy and unproductive thoughts:

              1. The Inner Critic

              This is your constant abuser who is often a conglomeration of:

              • Other people’s words; many times your parents.
              • Thoughts you have created based on your own or other peoples expectations.
              • Comparing yourself to other people, including those in the media.
              • The things you told yourself as a result of painful experiences such as betrayal and rejection. Your interpretation creates your self-doubt and self-blame, which are most likely undeserved in cases of rejection and betrayal.

              The Inner Critic is motivated by pain, low self-esteem, lack of self-acceptance and lack of self-love.

              Why else would this person abuse you? And since this person is actually you– why else would you abuse yourself? Why would you let anyone treat you this badly?

              2. The Worrier

              This person lives in the future; in the world of “what ifs.”

              The Worrier is motivated by fear which is often irrational and with no basis for it. Occasionally, this person is motivated by fear that what happened in the past will happen again.

              3. The Reactor or Trouble-Maker

              This is the one that triggers anger, frustration and pain. These triggers stem from unhealed wounds of the past. Any experience that is even closely related to a past wound will set him off.

              Advertising

              This person can be set off by words or feelings, and can even be set off by sounds and smells.

              The Reactor has no real motivation and has poor impulse control and is run by past programming that no longer serves you, if it ever did.

              4. The Sleep Depriver

              This can be a combination of any number of different squatters including the inner planner, the rehasher, and the ruminator, along with the inner critic and the worrier.

              The Sleep Depriver’s motivation can be:

              • As a reaction to silence, which he fights against
              • Taking care of the business you neglected during the day
              • Self-doubt, low self-esteem, insecurity and generalized anxiety
              • As listed above for the inner critic and worrier

              How can you control these squatters?

              How to Master Your Mind

              You are the thinker and the observer of your thoughts. You must pay attention to your thoughts so you can identify “who” is running the show; this will determine which technique you will want to use.

              Begin each day with the intention of paying attention to your thoughts and catching yourself when you are thinking undesirable thoughts.

              There are two ways to control your thoughts:

              • Technique A – Interrupt and replace them
              • Technique B – Eliminate them altogether

              This second option is what is known as peace of mind!

              The technique of interrupting and replacing is a means of reprogramming your subconscious mind. Eventually, the replacement thoughts will become the “go to” thoughts in the applicable situations.

              Use Technique A with the Inner Critic and Worrier; and Technique B with the Reactor and Sleep Depriver.

              For the Inner Critic

              When you catch yourself thinking something negative about yourself (calling yourself names, disrespecting yourself, or berating yourself), interrupt it.

              You can yell (in your mind), “Stop! No!” or, “Enough! I’m in control now.” Then, whatever your negative thought was about yourself, replace it with an opposite or counter thought or an affirmation that begins with “I am.”

              For example, if your thought is, “I’m such a loser,” you can replace it with, “I am a Divine Creation of the Universal Spirit. I am a perfect spiritual being learning to master the human experience. I am a being of energy, light, and matter. I am magnificent, brilliant, and beautiful. I love and approve of myself just as I am.”

              You can also have a dialogue with yourself with the intention of discrediting the ‘voice’ that created the thought, if you know whose voice it is:

              Advertising

              “Just because so-and-so said I was a loser doesn’t make it true. It was his or her opinion, not a statement of fact. Or maybe they were joking and I took it seriously because I’m insecure.”

              If you recognize that you have recurring self-critical thoughts, you can write out or pre-plan your counter thoughts or affirmation so you can be ready. This is the first squatter you should evict, forcefully, if necessary:

              • They rile up the Worrier.
              • The names you call yourself become triggers when called those names by others, so he also maintains the presence of the Reactor.
              • They are often present when you try to fall asleep so he perpetuates the Sleep Depriver.
              • They are a bully and is verbally and emotionally abusive.
              • They are the destroyer of self-esteem. They convince you that you’re not worthy. They’re a liar! In the interest of your self-worth, get them out!

              Eliminate your worst critic and you will also diminish the presence of the other three squatters.

              Replace them with your new best friends who support, encourage, and enhance your life. This is a presence you want in your mind.

              For the Worrier

              Prolonged anxiety is mentally, emotionally and physically unhealthy. It can have long-term health implications.

              Fear initiates the fight or flight response, creates worry in the mind and creates anxiety in the body.

              You should be able to recognize a “worry thought” immediately by how you feel. The physiological signs that the fight or flight response of fear has kicked in are:

              • Increased heart rate, blood pressure, or surge of adrenaline
              • Shallow breathing or breathlessness
              • Muscles tense

              Use the above stated method to interrupt any thought of worry and then replace it. But this time you will replace your thoughts of worry with thoughts of gratitude for the outcome you wish for.

              If you believe in a higher power, this is the time to engage with it. Here is an example:

              Instead of worrying about my loved ones traveling in bad weather, I say the following (I call it a prayer):

              “Thank you great spirit for watching over _______. Thank you for watching over his/her car and keeping it safe, road-worthy, and free of maintenance issues without warning. Thank you for surrounding him/her with only safe, conscientious, and alert drivers. And thank you for keeping him/her safe, conscientious, and alert.”

              Smile when you think about it or say it aloud, and phrase it in the present tense; both of these will help you feel it and possibly even start to believe it.

              If you can visualize what you are praying for, the visualization will enhance the feeling so you will increase the impact in your vibrational field.

              Now take a calming breath, slowly in through your nose, and slowly out through the mouth. Take as many as you like!

              Replacing fearful thoughts with gratitude will decrease reactionary behavior, taking the steam out of the Reactor.

              Advertising

              For example:

              If your child gets lost in the mall, the typical parental reaction that follows the fearful thoughts when finding them is to yell at them.

              “I told you never to leave my sight.” This reaction just adds to the child’s fear level from being lost in the first place. Plus, it also teaches them that mom and/or dad will get mad when he or she makes a mistake, which may make them lie to you or not tell you things in the future.

              Change those fearful thoughts when they happen:

              “Thank You (your choice of Higher Power) for watching over my child and keeping him safe. Thank you for helping me find him soon.”

              Then, when you see your child after this thought process, your only reaction will be gratitude, and that seems like a better alternative for all people involved.

              For the Trouble-Maker, Reactor or Over-Reactor

              Permanently eliminating this squatter will take a bit more attention and reflection after the fact to identify and heal the causes of the triggers; but until then, you can prevent the Reactor from getting out of control by initiating conscious breathing as soon as you recognize his presence.

              The Reactor’s thoughts or feelings activate the fight or flight response just like with the Worrier. The physiological signs of his presence will be the same. With a little attention, you should be able to tell the difference between anxiety, anger, frustration, or pain:

              • Increased heart rate and blood pressure; surge of adrenaline
              • Shallow breathing or breathlessness
              • Muscles tension

              I’m sure you’ve heard the suggestion to count to ten when you get angry—well, you can make those ten seconds much more productive if you are breathing consciously during that time.

              Conscious breathing is as simple as it sounds; just be conscious of your breathing. Pay attention to the air going in and coming out.

              Breathe in through your nose:

              • Feel the air entering your nostrils.
              • Feel your lungs filling and expanding.
              • Focus on your belly rising.

              Breathe out through your nose:

              • Feel your lungs emptying.
              • Focus on your belly falling.
              • Feel the air exiting your nostrils.

              Do this for as long as you like. Leave the situation if you want. This gives the adrenaline time to normalize.

              Now you can address the situation with a calmer, more rational perspective and avoid damaging behavior.

              One of the troubles this squatter causes is that it adds to the sleep depriver’s issues. By evicting, or at least controlling the Reactor, you will decrease reactionary behavior, which will decrease the need for the rehashing and ruminating that may keep you from falling asleep.

              Advertising

              Master your mind and stop the Reactor from bringing stress to you and your relationships!

              For the Sleep Depriver

              (They’re made up of the Inner Planner, the Rehasher and the Ruminator, along with the Inner Critic and the Worrier.)

              I was plagued with a very common problem: not being able to turn off my mind at bedtime. This inability prevented me from falling asleep and thus, getting a restful and restorative night’s sleep.

              Here’s how I mastered my mind and evicted the Sleep Depriver and all his cronies.

              1. I started by focusing on my breathing—paying attention to the rise and fall of my belly—but that didn’t keep the thoughts out for long. (Actually, I now start with checking my at-rest mouth position to keep me from clenching.)
              2. Then I came up with replacement strategy that eliminated uncontrolled thinking—imagining the word in while breathing in and thinking the word out when breathing out. I would (and do) elongate the word to match the length of my breath.

              When I catch myself thinking, I shift back to in, out. With this technique, I am still thinking, sort of, but the wheels are no longer spinning out of control. I am in control of my mind and I choose quiet.

              From the first time I tried this method I started to yawn after only a few cycles and am usually asleep within ten minutes.

              For really difficult nights, I add an increase of attention by holding my eyes in a looking-up position (Closed, of course!). Sometimes I try to look toward my third eye but that really hurts my eyes.

              If you have trouble falling asleep because you can’t shut off your mind, I strongly recommend you try this technique. I still use it every night. You can start sleeping better tonight!

              You can also use this technique any time you want to:

              • Fall back to sleep if you wake up too soon.
              • Shut down your thinking.
              • Calm your feelings.
              • Simply focus on the present moment. 

              The Bottom Line

              Your mind is a tool, and like any other tool, it can be used for constructive purposes or for destructive purposes.

              You can allow your mind to be occupied by unwanted, undesirable and destructive tenants, or you can choose desirable tenants like peace, gratitude, compassion, love, and joy.

              Your mind can become your best friend, your biggest supporter, and someone you can count on to be there and encourage you. The choice is yours!

              More About Mental Strength

              Featured photo credit: Priscilla Du Preez via unsplash.com

              Read Next