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Improve the Appetite of Elderly People With Ease

Improve the Appetite of Elderly People With Ease

Perhaps you are of the older generation of folks, or maybe you are a caretaker for someone who is elderly. Whatever the case may be, it is more than likely that your appetite is not in the best shape. While it is an inevitable sign of the digestive system changing due to old age, it can be difficult to stomach the truth. Pun intended.

In any case, you do not have to be worried about appetite loss because it can always be improved. We are here to help. Below are stress-free ways to improve the appetite of elderly people easily, making it hassle-free to get back into enjoying what you love, e.g. food! Without further ado, let’s begin!

Things to Consider When it Comes to Appetite Loss

Before you start improving your appetite (or that of your elderly patient), you will need to consider the possible reasons why the appetite is lacking in the first place. Essentially, we can attribute a loss in appetite to a few of these factors:

1. Allergies.

Suppose the elderly person has a food allergy that he or she had not known about. Whether it is an allergy to dairy products, wheat, or to seafood – having such an allergy can affect how the stomach processes (or rather, rejects) the food consumed. Being careful when you expose yourself (or your patient) to different foods is the way to go.

2. Portion control.

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Serving either too large or too small of a portion can be a problem, as it can interfere with the digestive tract. Too large of a portion can lead to discomfort and indigestion, while a portion that is too small can leave one unsatisfied and prone to consuming more food later on. Either way, none of them are ideal.

3. Use of spices and herbs.

As you age, your taste buds start to fade, meaning that taste becomes less intense and flavorful. That said, spices and herbs, such as chili powder, cilantro, or even black pepper, might not taste the same as it once did, which, as a result, can discourage elderly people from eating. Lack of flavor means a meal that is less palatable and thus, less desirable.

4. Changes to the digestive system.

Naturally, as people get older, it is not uncommon to start developing problems in terms of digestion. From aspects like constipation and bloating to ulcers, there are a variety of issues that are annoying and even dangerous, but also an inevitable part of life.

How to Improve the Appetite

Now that you know some possible reasons why elderly people have problems with their appetites, it is now time to reverse that trend. Here, we give you a breakdown of possible options that you can do to change the situation:

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1. Make it a routine.

If you have spent a large part of your life with an irregular eating schedule, then it might be a good idea to change those habits and aim for a consistent eating schedule.

For instance, if you normally skip breakfast, then it can be beneficial to try to start to eat in the morning. Not only will this stimulate your appetite, but it will also help you control your appetite for the subsequent meals, i.e. lunch and dinner.

2. Drink plenty of fluids.

Water and other liquids are of the most essential aspects of keeping your health and wellness in tact, in terms of maintaining chemical balances in the body that keep you feeling good and refreshed.

If you are lacking proper hydration, then help yourself to a glass of water to hydrate and re-energize. Aim for a few glasses each day, and you will start to notice your appetite returning to normal as well.

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3. Keep a positive mind.

This is more of a psychological point, but it is not only physical factors that can have an impact to your appetite, but also on your current mental state as well. For instance, people with depression either tend to overeat or eat nothing at all, which then upsets the balance in the digestive system.

That said, if you are feeling just a little bit down, try to do some uplifting activities, like spending time with friends, exercising, or watching your favorite television show. Having a happier outlook on life will make you more likely to resume a normal digestive balance. In addition to that, if you suffer from depression, talking to a therapist can be a good alternative to consider.

4. Social eating.

Adding on from point #3 above, spending time with good friends not only cheers you up, but it can also encourage social eating, where all of you get together and have a nice meal around the table. This is especially great if you do not feel the incentive to eat on your own because having friends to cook and eat with can be a great influence in the way you eat.

Perhaps you can plan out a dinner during the week to get together at the house and enjoy the company of one another. All through food, of course! You can plan out who will make what dish and then bring it over, pot-luck style, for everyone to taste and enjoy. This is also a good way to expand your palate to new flavors and cuisines!

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5. Try cooking different dishes and/or cuisines.

While delicious, cooking steak and potatoes every day over a long period of time can really put you in a rut, not to mention get you tired of the taste quickly. With that being said, why not spice it up?

In other words, expand your cooking skills to other dishes out there: test out a new spaghetti recipe or try your hand at preparing seafood. Or, if you still cannot give up steak and potatoes, try adding different seasonings (herbs, garlic powder, chili powder) to shake up the usual salt-and-pepper standard. Not only will it be more interesting, but also potentially more delicious!

Conclusion

The appetite is a delicate balance between physiological and mental conditions that can change drastically as you get older. However, instead of succumbing to it, stimulate it by reevaluating your lifestyle and cooking new dishes! Pretty soon, you will have a solid appetite to enjoy the pleasures of eating again.

Featured photo credit: Appetite of Elderly People via ascseniorcare.com

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Jessica Natalie

Teacher, Runner

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Published on December 20, 2019

Is Authoritarian Parenting Good or Bad for Your Child?

Is Authoritarian Parenting Good or Bad for Your Child?

Kate sits down to the dinner table and is eager to be a good girl and eat her dinner like her Mom and Dad want her to do. She is a sweet girl who wants the approval of her parents very much. It is not always easy though. During dinner, she stands up and starts to leave the table because she has to use the bathroom. Her Dad yells at her to sit back down. He tells her “we don’t just get up from the dinner table, we wait and ask to be excused after everyone is finished eating.” She begins to protest, wanting to explain that she needs to use the bathroom. Her father becomes more upset with her and yells at her that she is now talking back and she is not allowed to say another word at the dinner table until everyone is finished eating and then she can be excused.

Unfortunately for Kate, she can’t hold it, and she has a little accident because she is too fearful to say a word to her Dad. She doesn’t want to get yelled at anymore. She also knows that in her home, kids don’t have a say. What Mom and Dad say is like words carved into stone. They are strict beyond reason and they will not bend their rules. Therefore, Kate felt that she had no choice in the matter and when she could no longer hold it. There was nothing she could do about it.

Kate’s parents are an example of authoritarian parenting. They are strict, they are not emotionally engaged with their children, and they have very high expectations for their children. This type of parenting style leaves children feeling disconnected from their parents.

Kate wanted to communicate to her parents that she had to use the restroom, but she couldn’t even get her words out because her parents have such strict rules and demands of her. They did not care to hear what she had to say, because upholding their rules was more important to them. In their household, a child’s opinions and feelings do not matter.

This kind of strict parenting is not helpful for children. It can damage a child and leave them with low self-esteem, mental health issues, and doing poor academically among other problems cited by research in Parenting Science.[1]

What Does Authoritarian Parenting Look Like?

In the 1960’s, a researcher and theorist by the name of Baumrind established the well known theory of parenting styles. Those four parenting styles, which are well known today, are authoritarian, authoritative, passive, and neglectful. For proactive parents that are trying hard to be good parents, they will usually lean toward either authoritarian or authoritative.

Authoritarian parenting involves strict parenting and high expectations for children. This can sound reasonable and even like good parenting. However, the strict parenting is often characterized by lack of compassion toward the child, little to no flexibility in rules, and complete control sought over the child’s behavior.

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Parents who use this parenting style believe it is their job to control the will and behavior of their children. An article in Psychology Today explains how authoritarian parents operate:[2]

Authoritarian parents believe that children are, by nature, strong-willed and self-indulgent. They value obedience to higher authority as a virtue unto itself. Authoritarian parents see their primary job to be bending the will of the child to that of authority—the parent, the church, the teacher. Willfulness is seen to be the root of unhappiness, bad behavior, and sin. Thus, a loving parent is one who tries to break the will of the child.

For example, Jake has authoritarian parents. He wants to stay out past curfew on a school night because he has an opportunity to play in a jazz ensemble. He has been playing the saxophone for years and his ambition is to play in a college jazz ensemble.

With Jake still being in high school, his parents have a curfew. On school nights, it is 8:00 pm. This rule is instituted because his parents believe they need to ensure that Jake gets his school work done each night and that he needs to be well rested for school the next day. However, they don’t explain the why of their rules to him, they simply tell him that those are their rules. The jazz ensemble is practicing at 8:00 pm on a Thursday night and they have invited Jake to come play with them. It is a well known group and a huge opportunity for Jake.

Unfortunately, his parents say no. Their authoritarian parenting style is unwavering. He wants to discuss the opportunity and its importance, but his parents will not even entertain the conversation. They stop him mid-sentence and go over their rules again. There is no flexibility.

If Jake’s parents had been authoritative, they would have taken the time to hear out his case and would likely have granted him a later curfew for that one instance. They would see that, although they have a curfew, there are some instances when an opportunity is worth bending the rules. They would ask that he has his homework done before going to play with the group, and that he come home as soon as the practice was finished.

Authoritative parents have rules, but they are also flexible based on reasonable requests for exceptions. The authoritative parents are interested in how their children are thinking and feeling. Conversely, authoritarian parents are not likely to be interested in hearing their child’s thoughts and feelings, because they want to control the will of their child, not come to some middle ground.

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Here are some characteristics of authoritarian parenting:

  • They have strict rules that are unyielding and unwavering. This is often called “heavy handed parenting.”
  • They do not want input from the child about rules. They also feel that the child’s opinion does not matter, because they are the parent thus are the supreme authority over the child.
  • There are severe punishments when rules are broken.
  • There is an emotional disconnection between parent and child, because the parent is not interested in what the child thinks or feels. They are more interested in controlling the behavior of the child and having the child be compliant to their rules.
  • Children are expected to listen to their parents and follow the rules, there are no exceptions. A child that voices their objections will likely be punished for doing so.
  • The parents have high expectations, especially when it comes to compliance of their rules.
  • Parents expect that their child will be obedient and they do not need to explain the “why” of their rules and expectations. Compliance is expected out of sheer obedience, not because the child understands the reasons why the rules are set. Parents do not feel the need to explain why they set their rules.
  • There is a failure to have attached relationships between parent and child because of the overly dominant nature of authoritarian parents and their unwillingness to allow their children to have their own voice or free will.

Authoritarian parents are driven by a belief that they need to control their children. This means controlling their children’s behavior to an extreme. They are inflexible and don’t take into account the child’s desires, emotions, or well-being as being as important to enforcing rules to get the desired outcome. Authoritative parents on the other hand, seek to guide and direct their children instead of control. There is a distinction.

The Problems of Authoritarian Parenting

Authoritarian parenting has many negative consequences to children. Children who are raised in homes with extreme authoritarian parenting are more likely to become dependent on drugs and alcohol, have lower academic performance, and increased mental health issues according to Parenting for Brain.[3] Children who are raised with authoritarian parents are also more likely to have lower self esteem, inability to make decisive choices, and have social skills that are lacking.

When a child is raised to be taught day in and day out that their voice does not matter, then that child will likely be ingrained with that belief. They will not value their own opinions because they have been taught that what they think does not matter and is of no value. This leads to poor self-esteem and low self-worth.

If a child doesn’t believe that their thoughts matter, then what they think about themselves overall is going to be affected. They will not think highly of themselves or believe that what they think, say, or do is of value. This will contribute to low self-esteem long term.

Social skills will suffer because a child who comes from an authoritarian home will be trained to believe that nobody wants to hear their opinion and that relationships are based on compliance.

For example, Judy is raised in an authoritarian home. She is now 18 years old and has her first boyfriend. Anytime that he asks something of her, even if she internally disagrees, she feels that she is supposed to comply and do what he says in order for him to like her and continue wanting to be with her.

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He wants to have sex. She does not feel that she is ready, but she will not voice this to her boyfriend because she doesn’t think that her opinion will matter or that he will want to listen to what she is feeling. She goes along with sex in their relationship to be compliant. She doesn’t want to be punished by disagreeing with not having sex. He says that they are ready for that next step in the relationship and she fears that the consequence of saying no would be that he ends the relationship.

Therefore, she doesn’t even voice her thoughts or feelings on the situation because she doesn’t think they have value or will be heard anyway.

She has been taught by her parents that her opinions and feelings don’t matter. She has learned from the past 18 years with her parents that what matters most is that she is compliant. She gets along with her parents best when she is doing exactly what they want her to do. This is why she feels the need to do the same with her boyfriend.

Going along with his decisions, being compliant, and not voicing her feelings will keep the relationship going and avoid conflict or punishment. The ultimate punishment in her mind would be that he ends the relationship.

With her opinions never being valued by those who she has loved the most (her parents), she has learned that she should not voice her opinion if she wants to keep the other person in the relationship happy. In her mind, because of how she has been raised, compliance overrides all else, and her opinion is meaningless.

However, her boyfriend is not her parents. He is understanding and would want to know how she feels. He wants a long term relationship with her and he loves her so much. His true desire is for her to be happy. He would never want her to have sex if she wasn’t feeling the same way that he was feeling. He would gladly wait and would want to hear what she thinks and feels about taking their relationship to the next level.

Authoritarian parenting methods can inflict great harm on a child. The child becomes emotionally damaged because they grow up believing that their opinions, thoughts, and feelings do not matter. Instead they are taught that compliance and being obedient supersedes all else.

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The Solution

The solution is to move from authoritarian parenting methods to authoritative parenting practices.

Authoritative parenting has been deemed as the best parenting method by researchers, according to Psychology Today. Parents who use authoritative parenting methods have rules for their children, but they are not looking for blind compliance. They recognize that having a relationship with their child is of great importance and therefore valuing the child’s voice, opinions, and thoughts is important.

Authoritative parents seek to guide and direct their children, but they do not seek to control the will of their child.

Parenting Coach Plan explains the foundation of authoritative parenting as the following:[4]

Authoritative parenting can be described as a style of parenting that combines firm limits and clear boundaries with fair and consistent discipline. Authoritative parents are also nurturing, highly-involved, and willing to speak openly with their child regarding expectations and the consequences for failing to meet those expectations. Rules are enforced and fair consequences are put in place for when those rules are broken.

Children raised in authoritative homes follow the rules because they understand the “why” of the rules. They are also bonded to their parents because they are able to talk to their parents openly. This bond helps nurture a positive home environment and a two-way relationship that can last a lifetime.

To learn more about how to be an authoritative parent and how to discipline a child using this parenting method, check out my article:

How to Discipline a Child (The Complete Guide for Different Ages)

Featured photo credit: Xavier Mouton Photographie via unsplash.com

Reference

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