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Everyone Is Afraid Of Showing Their Vulnerable Side, But That’s What Makes Us Stronger

Everyone Is Afraid Of Showing Their Vulnerable Side, But That’s What Makes Us Stronger

For most of us, being strong means having strong set of beliefs and principles that cannot be questioned and always keeping calm and unshaken, whatever the situation is. Yet, it seems that we had it wrong all along. Not recognizing one’s vulnerable side actually lessens their chance of personal growth, because they don’t allow a whole another side of their personality to be expressed, recognized and eventually improved.

In the words of Lao Tzu:

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“A man is born gentle and weak; at his death he is hard and stiff. All things, including the grass and trees, are soft and pliable in life; dry and brittle in death. Stiffness is thus a companion of death; flexibility a companion of life. An army that cannot yield will be defeated. A tree that cannot bend will crack in the wind. The hard and stiff will be broken; the soft and supple will prevail.”

If we want to live a fulfilled life of realized potential and personal growth, we need to give in to the vulnerability and allow ourselves to feel weak and fragile, since it is also part of our nature.

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More honest friendships

Our relationships with our loved ones will become more genuine and sincere, once we open up to them and show our “negative” sides we’ve been hiding from them. Being vulnerable with your friends makes your bond even stronger as they get to see that you go through the same difficulties. Sharing and helping each other grow makes you more empathetic, and your friendship much more honest.

Next time you are anxious, scared or insecure, instead of putting on a brave face, let your friends know what you are going through. You will both feel the relief for staying true to your feelings. Moreover, you will be surprised at how much more you have in common, and finally, you will get support and help, possibly for life.

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Getting to know your true self

We’ve been taught that being strong and confident is good while being fragile and insecure is not. It is no wonder that we’ve learned to hide our “faults” so well that we don’t know who we are any more. So many people today are suffering from social anxiety, a condition that can be easily treated and cured. Yet, many are left untreated because of their unwillingness and inability to acknowledge the issue as it would mean that they are exposed, vulnerable and weak.

We have programmed ourselves to deny our weaknesses so much so that we can’t tell the signs when they are right in front of us. Yet, if we really want to work on continuously improving our lives, first step we need to take is to get to know ourselves better by embracing our vulnerability as well.

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Getting out of your comfort zone for self-realization

There is no faster and better way to personal growth than accepting and embracing our insecurities. Think of all those moments when you felt scared and insecure and wanted to run and hide. Those moments were pushing you out of your comfort zone. Most people’s first response would be to stay in familiar territory and not risk being exposed to their insecurities even if this means not reaching their goals and potentials. However, the lessons we refuse to learn will keep on coming until we face them head on.

Breaking familiar patterns isn’t easy, so we need to take baby steps. We should set small, achievable goals first, before we can tackle the big issue. For example, people struggling with social anxiety should start by practicing speaking in front of familiar groups of friends, and then continue with smaller groups of strangers until they reach their goal of being comfortable at speaking in front of larger groups of unfamiliar people. Comfort zone may seem like a safe sanctuary, but they are in fact keeping us from making any personal progress. Embracing our discomfort will help us eliminate it eventually and achieve our greatest goals.

Featured photo credit: https://unsplash.com/ via images.unsplash.com

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Ana Erkic

Social Media Consultant, Online Marketing Strategist, Copywriter, CEO and Co-Founder of Growato

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Last Updated on January 21, 2020

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

If I was a super hero I’d want my super power to be the ability to motivate everyone around me. Think of how many problems you could solve just by being able to motivate people towards their goals. You wouldn’t be frustrated by lazy co-workers. You wouldn’t be mad at your partner for wasting the weekend in front of the TV. Also, the more people around you are motivated toward their dreams, the more you can capitalize off their successes.

Being able to motivate people is key to your success at work, at home, and in the future because no one can achieve anything alone. We all need the help of others.

So, how to motivate people? Here are 7 ways to motivate others even you can do.

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1. Listen

Most people start out trying to motivate someone by giving them a lengthy speech, but this rarely works because motivation has to start inside others. The best way to motivate others is to start by listening to what they want to do. Find out what the person’s goals and dreams are. If it’s something you want to encourage, then continue through these steps.

2. Ask Open-Ended Questions

Open-ended questions are the best way to figure out what someone’s dreams are. If you can’t think of anything to ask, start with, “What have you always wanted to do?”

“Why do you want to do that?”

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“What makes you so excited about it?”

“How long has that been your dream?”

You need this information the help you with the following steps.

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3. Encourage

This is the most important step, because starting a dream is scary. People are so scared they will fail or look stupid, many never try to reach their goals, so this is where you come in. You must encourage them. Say things like, “I think you will be great at that.” Better yet, say, “I think your skills in X will help you succeed.” For example if you have a friend who wants to own a pet store, say, “You are so great with animals, I think you will be excellent at running a pet store.”

4. Ask About What the First Step Will Be

After you’ve encouraged them, find how they will start. If they don’t know, you can make suggestions, but it’s better to let the person figure out the first step themselves so they can be committed to the process.

5. Dream

This is the most fun step, because you can dream about success. Say things like, “Wouldn’t it be cool if your business took off, and you didn’t have to work at that job you hate?” By allowing others to dream, you solidify the motivation in place and connect their dreams to a future reality.

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6. Ask How You Can Help

Most of the time, others won’t need anything from you, but it’s always good to offer. Just letting the person know you’re there will help motivate them to start. And, who knows, maybe your skills can help.

7. Follow Up

Periodically, over the course of the next year, ask them how their goal is going. This way you can find out what progress has been made. You may need to do the seven steps again, or they may need motivation in another area of their life.

Final Thoughts

By following these seven steps, you’ll be able to encourage the people around you to achieve their dreams and goals. In return, you’ll be more passionate about getting to your goals, you’ll be surrounded by successful people, and others will want to help you reach your dreams …

Oh, and you’ll become a motivational super hero. Time to get a cape!

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Featured photo credit: Thought Catalog via unsplash.com

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