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Everyone Is Afraid Of Showing Their Vulnerable Side, But That’s What Makes Us Stronger

Everyone Is Afraid Of Showing Their Vulnerable Side, But That’s What Makes Us Stronger

For most of us, being strong means having strong set of beliefs and principles that cannot be questioned and always keeping calm and unshaken, whatever the situation is. Yet, it seems that we had it wrong all along. Not recognizing one’s vulnerable side actually lessens their chance of personal growth, because they don’t allow a whole another side of their personality to be expressed, recognized and eventually improved.

In the words of Lao Tzu:

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“A man is born gentle and weak; at his death he is hard and stiff. All things, including the grass and trees, are soft and pliable in life; dry and brittle in death. Stiffness is thus a companion of death; flexibility a companion of life. An army that cannot yield will be defeated. A tree that cannot bend will crack in the wind. The hard and stiff will be broken; the soft and supple will prevail.”

If we want to live a fulfilled life of realized potential and personal growth, we need to give in to the vulnerability and allow ourselves to feel weak and fragile, since it is also part of our nature.

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More honest friendships

Our relationships with our loved ones will become more genuine and sincere, once we open up to them and show our “negative” sides we’ve been hiding from them. Being vulnerable with your friends makes your bond even stronger as they get to see that you go through the same difficulties. Sharing and helping each other grow makes you more empathetic, and your friendship much more honest.

Next time you are anxious, scared or insecure, instead of putting on a brave face, let your friends know what you are going through. You will both feel the relief for staying true to your feelings. Moreover, you will be surprised at how much more you have in common, and finally, you will get support and help, possibly for life.

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Getting to know your true self

We’ve been taught that being strong and confident is good while being fragile and insecure is not. It is no wonder that we’ve learned to hide our “faults” so well that we don’t know who we are any more. So many people today are suffering from social anxiety, a condition that can be easily treated and cured. Yet, many are left untreated because of their unwillingness and inability to acknowledge the issue as it would mean that they are exposed, vulnerable and weak.

We have programmed ourselves to deny our weaknesses so much so that we can’t tell the signs when they are right in front of us. Yet, if we really want to work on continuously improving our lives, first step we need to take is to get to know ourselves better by embracing our vulnerability as well.

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Getting out of your comfort zone for self-realization

There is no faster and better way to personal growth than accepting and embracing our insecurities. Think of all those moments when you felt scared and insecure and wanted to run and hide. Those moments were pushing you out of your comfort zone. Most people’s first response would be to stay in familiar territory and not risk being exposed to their insecurities even if this means not reaching their goals and potentials. However, the lessons we refuse to learn will keep on coming until we face them head on.

Breaking familiar patterns isn’t easy, so we need to take baby steps. We should set small, achievable goals first, before we can tackle the big issue. For example, people struggling with social anxiety should start by practicing speaking in front of familiar groups of friends, and then continue with smaller groups of strangers until they reach their goal of being comfortable at speaking in front of larger groups of unfamiliar people. Comfort zone may seem like a safe sanctuary, but they are in fact keeping us from making any personal progress. Embracing our discomfort will help us eliminate it eventually and achieve our greatest goals.

Featured photo credit: https://unsplash.com/ via images.unsplash.com

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Ana Erkic

Social Media Consultant, Online Marketing Strategist, Copywriter, CEO and Co-Founder of Growato

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Last Updated on September 20, 2018

7 Powerful Questions To Find Out What You Want To Do With Your Life

7 Powerful Questions To Find Out What You Want To Do With Your Life

What do I want to do with my life? It’s a question all of us think about at one point or another.

For some, the answer comes easily. For others, it takes a lifetime to figure out.

It’s easy to just go through the motions and continue to do what’s comfortable and familiar. But for those of you who seek fulfillment, who want to do more, these questions will help you paint a clearer picture of what you want to do with your life.

1. What are the things I’m most passionate about?

The first step to living a more fulfilling life is to think about the things that you’re passionate about.

What do you love? What fulfills you? What “work” do you do that doesn’t feel like work? Maybe you enjoy writing, maybe you love working with animals or maybe you have a knack for photography.

The point is, figure out what you love doing, then do more of it.

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2. What are my greatest accomplishments in life so far?

Think about your past experiences and the things in your life you’re most proud of.

How did those accomplishments make you feel? Pretty darn good, right? So why not try and emulate those experiences and feelings?

If you ran a marathon once and loved the feeling you had afterwards, start training for another one. If your child grew up to be a star athlete or musician because of your teachings, then be a coach or mentor for other kids.

Continue to do the things that have been most fulfilling for you.

3. If my life had absolutely no limits, what would I choose to have and what would I choose to do?

Here’s a cool exercise: Think about what you would do if you had no limits.

If you had all the money and time in the world, where would you go? What would you do? Who would you spend time with?

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These answers can help you figure out what you want to do with your life. It doesn’t mean you need millions of dollars to be happy though.

What it does mean is answering these questions will help you set goals to reach certain milestones and create a path toward happiness and fulfillment. Which leads to our next question …

4. What are my goals in life?

Goals are a necessary component to set you up for a happy future. So answer these questions:

Once you figure out the answers to each of these, you’ll have a much better idea of what you should do with your life.

5. Whom do I admire most in the world?

Following the path of successful people can set you up for success.

Think about the people you respect and admire most. What are their best qualities? Why do you respect them? What can you learn from them?

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You’re the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with.[1] So don’t waste your time with people who hold you back from achieving your dreams.

Spend more time with happy, successful, optimistic people and you’ll become one of them.

6. What do I not like to do?

An important part of figuring out what you want to do with your life is honestly assessing what you don’t want to do.

What are the things you despise? What bugs you the most about your current job?

Maybe you hate meetings even though you sit through 6 hours of them every day. If that’s the case, find a job where you can work more independently.

The point is, if you want something to change in your life, you need to take action. Which leads to our final question …

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7. How hard am I willing to work to get what I want?

Great accomplishments never come easy. If you want to do great things with your life, you’re going to have to make a great effort. That will probably mean putting in more hours the average person, getting outside your comfort zone and learning as much as you can to achieve as much as you can.

But here’s the cool part: it’s often the journey that is the most fulfilling part. It’s during these seemingly small, insignificant moments that you’ll often find that “aha” moments that helps you answer the question,

“What do I want to do with my life?”

So take the first step toward improving your life. You won’t regret it.

Featured photo credit: Andrew Ly via unsplash.com

Reference

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