Advertising
Advertising

How To Feel Like Your Authentic Self In Social Situations

How To Feel Like Your Authentic Self In Social Situations

Are you someone who feels more of their true self when no one else is around, as opposed to being in the presence of others?

I don’t know about you, but I personally feel more relaxed, laid back, and maybe a bit silly when I am home alone with just me and the dog! I am giddy, unguarded, and YES…I talk to myself, sing to the dog and call her silly names! (I think she likes it.)

Advertising

Young children seem to get it right better than any of us adults do when it comes to being their true authentic self. They sing, laugh, dance & live with an abundance of energy and no worries of whether anyone else is watching or of what anyone thinks of them.

It is none of your business of what others think about you

As adults, we are more on guard than children are, in social situations because conversations with others can lead us to feel assorted emotions with many shades of gray in between. Since we have a desire to bond and be accepted by other people, we self-consciously watch what we say, how we say it and decide whether to be agreeable or complacent. Plus we study the other person’s body language to judge the authenticity of the person and of how the conversation is making us feel at that particular moment.

Advertising

There are certain types of people with a stronger personality, who tend to make others feel inferior by emanating more of an intense negative vibe. It is the friction between their ego fighting against yours that can make you feel uncomfortable or imbalanced either emotionally or physically, bringing you down energetically. Basically…like attracts like, so if someone that you are talking to is miserable, then that can be contagious to you…making you miserable as well!

Remember…It Is never you. It is always them. Some people simply have the inability to make others feel welcomed. Plus, those who are unhappy with themselves sometimes have a way of characterizing other people in a negative light, that they themselves are hiding behind.

Advertising

You have a choice of whether or not to take on the belief of what others think of you. Basically, you need to ignore it or risk feeling any potential imbalance because of it. What others think about you is simply a theory and opinion,…not a fact!  It is up to you to make the decision to dismiss it and to not let it have any impact on you what so ever. In other words, it is none of your business of what others think about you. Period.

Four key factors that affect the way other people can make you feel

  1. The mood that the other person is in, and if they are feeling positive or negative.
  2. Whether they are emanating a sense of fear or love towards you.
  3. The intensity of their personality and whether they have a desire to make others feel inferior or accepted.
  4. Your ability to protect your emotions from another person’s negative vibe.

You may not have the total control of how another person’s energy can make you feel at any given moment, but you can shield yourself by protecting your Aura.

Advertising

TRY THIS…

If necessary, when you are around certain people that you know can drain your energy, either physically or emotionally, put up an invisible protective shield around yourself to guard against other people’s negative input or vibe. (Sort of a way of rejecting or deflecting what other people are reflecting upon you.)

You are the bigger person with a clearer insight knowing how and when to be of comfort to others,…who is in need…and who deserves the comfort that you can give them. Be your true real self! No one can take your power away. You get one life as who you are now! And if no one has told you lately…you are perfect just the way you are!

More by this author

Lorrie Ober

Creative Enthusiast/blogger

Smiling lady 10 Ways To Embrace The Energy Of Words For A More Positive Thought Process Getty Images Reflect On ‘WHY’ To Get To A Healthier You Young woman looking out the window. Embracing a Positive Mindset Get To A Healthier You! How To Feel Like Your Authentic Self In Social Situations

Trending in Communication

1 What Is Your Destiny in Life? How to Mindfully Achieve Your Purpose 2 7 Signs of an Unhappy Relationship That Makes You Feel Stuck 3 10 Things You Can Do Now to Change Your Life Forever 4 Meditation Can Change Your Life: The Power of Mindfulness 5 Understand Your Love Style & Learn to Love: Co Dependent Relationship

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on September 17, 2018

7 Signs of an Unhappy Relationship That Makes You Feel Stuck

7 Signs of an Unhappy Relationship That Makes You Feel Stuck

Relationships are complicated and when you’re unhappy, it can be difficult to tell what’s causing it and what needs to change.

Sometimes it’s as easy as opening up to your partner about your problems, while other times it may be necessary to switch partners or roll solo to get your mind straight.

When you’re in the thick of things, it can be difficult to tell if you’re unhappy in your relationship or just unhappy in general (in which case, a relationship may be just the cure you need).

Here’re signs of an unhappy relationship that is possibly making you feel stuck:

1. You’re depressed about your home life.

No matter what you do in life, you’re going to have good and bad days. Your relationship is no different.

However, no matter what you’re going through at home, you have to feel comfortable in your own home.

If you constantly dread going home because your significant other is there, there’s a problem. Maybe it’s something you already know about, everyone has an argument or just needs some alone time.

Advertising

When that yearning to be alone becomes an insatiable obsession over the course of months and years, it’s time to realize you’re not the exception to the rule.

You’re unhappy in your relationship, and you need to take a look in the mirror and do whatever it takes to make yourself smile.

2. You aren’t comfortable being yourself.

Remember all those things you discovered about yourself when you first got together? The way your partner made you feel when you met that made you fall in love with him or her in the first place.

If they don’t make you feel that way anymore, it’s not the end of the world. If your partner makes you uncomfortable about being you, then her or she is only dragging you down. It’s up to you to decide how to handle that.

You need to be comfortable with who you are. This means being comfortable in your skin and with the way you walk, talk, look, breath, move, and all the other things that make you uniquely you.

If the person who supposedly loves you doesn’t make you feel good about yourself, know that you can do better. They’re not even one in a billion.

3. You can’t stop snooping.

Mutual trust is necessary in any relationship. The only way to get that trust is with respect.

Advertising

I can find you anywhere online, no matter how private and secure you think you are. The odds of you having a password I can’t crack are slim. If we’ve met in person, I could install a remote key logger on your device without even touching it.

Finding your information online hardly takes a clandestine organization. Any idiot with a Wi-Fi-enabled device can cyberstalk you. I’m just the only idiot in the village admitting it.

So now that we know everyone snoops, it’s time to address your personal habits. Governments snoop because they don’t trust us. If you’re snooping on your partner, it’s because you don’t trust them.

It’s ok to have doubts, and it’s perfectly normal to look into anything that looks weird, but keep in mind that data collection is only half of an investigation.

If you find yourself constantly snooping and questioning everything, clearly there’s a trust issue and the relationship likely needs to end.

4. You’re afraid of commitment.

If you’ve been dating longer than a year and you aren’t engaged, it’s never going to happen.

Commitment is important. People will come up with a million ways to describe why they can’t be committed.

Advertising

No matter who you are if you like it, you need to put a ring on it. Find an engagement ring, stick a gemstone in it and marry the person. If you’re not legally able to get married or you don’t believe in it for one reason or another, have a child (or adopt one, however you’re able to) or treat your partner’s family like your own. It’s a huge financial and mental commitment.

If you’re not ready for one or the other after some time, don’t waste anymore of your precious life on the relationship.

Your relationship should be something that propels you forward. If it’s not going anywhere, make it an open relationship and call it what it is—dating multiple people.

5. You imagine a happier life without your partner.

If all you’re doing is imagining a happier life without your partner, it’s a sign that you’re in the wrong relationship. You’re unhappy and you need to get out.

Your partner should be included in your dreams. There’s nothing wrong with wanting a future with someone.

Try to remember what you dreamed of before you got your heart broken by the realities of life, love and the pursuit of human success.

Remember when you would crush on that cute kid in class? You would secretly imagine marrying him or her and going on an adventure—that’s the way life should be.

Advertising

If you’re not at least imagining adventures together, then why are you in that relationship?

6. You resent, rather than love your partner.

When a relationship starts to crumble, you begin to resent your partner for all the things you once loved about him or her.

When you’ve reached this point, your partner has reached at least No. 2 on this list. From your partner’s perspective, your unhappiness with them is picked up as bashing them for being who they are.

If you’re both unhappy in the relationship, it’s better if it ends as quickly and painlessly as possible.

7. You chase past feelings.

It’s okay to reminisce about the past, but if all you do is wish things were like they used to be, it’s a sign you’re not on the right path.

You’re unhappy and, at the very least, you need to have an open dialogue about it. This isn’t necessarily a sign that the relationship should end, but it definitely needs a spark.

When you talk to your partner candidly about what it is you’re looking for, you never know how they’ll react. The risk alone is worth it, good or bad.

Final thoughts

If you’re feeling stuck in your current relationship, it’s time to reflect about it with your partner. Don’t ignore these signs of an unhappy relationship as they will slowly go worse and harm both you and your partner in long-term.

Featured photo credit: josh peterson via unsplash.com

Read Next