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8 Life Skills to Help You Improve Your Personality

8 Life Skills to Help You Improve Your Personality

When it comes to polishing your skills and improving your character, the possibilities are endless. If you make good use of the resources, you can learn new skills and develop new ones. Developing the personality can have a lot positive effect on your life and career. There was a belief that nature is permanent and it is not possible to change it. The personality is a typical pattern of behaviors, thinking, and they are unique. With outstanding effort, you can improve your habits and the pattern of thinking.

Here are some tips that will help you improve your personality.

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1. Become a Better Listener

If you are a good listener, you can learn a lot from your surroundings. Being an excellent listener is a very good skill. When you listen to other people, you give them importance. They also pay more attention to you and will become more engaging. It allows people to be more open to you and they will comfortably share any information with you. If someone listens to you intently, it makes you feel important. You provide the same feeling to other people by being a good listener. Try to instill this trait in your personality.

2. Expanding Your Interest

It is always good for the mental health to develop your interests. It will keep the mind fresh, and it will help in cultivating the new interests. It will also make you more attractive to others as you will always have new things to share and talk about. It instills you with more confidence and also provides you with an opportunity to share your views with people who have the same interests as you. You need to be creative and think outside the box. The interests can be literary or physical. You can join book clubs or experiment with creative things like paracord projects.

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3. Becoming a Better Conversationalist

When you know your interests, and are well versed in them, you will have more confidence to talk about them. Having more knowledge means that you can contribute more to the conversation. If you want people to listen to you, it is important that you are an impressive talker. It is not possible to know everything, and if you are good in making conversations, then you will be able to share your knowledge and learn from others as well.

4. Meeting New People

Always make an effort to meet new people. Engaging with people provides you with a lot of experience, and you can learn so much from different people. Meeting new people can expose you to new cultures, ideas, opinions and it expands your mind. Meeting new people makes you more tolerant towards other people. It can broaden your horizons.

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5. Polishing Interpersonal Skills

Interpersonal skills are the core competencies for a successful life. These skills are useful for communicating and interacting on a daily basis. These skills are needed not just for individual interactions, but also in groups. You can work on developing good interpersonal skills. It is not just important in professional life, it is also vital for personal lives. These skills include listening, building connections and persuasion.

6. Developing Leadership Skills

You may have heard the saying that leaders are born, but it is not entirely accurate. If you want to achieve success in your professional life, it is important that you seek to develop and polish your leadership skills. Employees always look forward to improving them because it includes dealing with people and motivating them.

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7. Presentation Skills

If you want to make sure that you can get your message across to other people, you need to have effective presentation skills. These skills are required in almost all fields. You need to have all the necessary skills like speaking and creativity to make the best use of your presentation skills.

8. Treating People With Respect

It is important that when you make promises to people, you fulfill them. Honesty and truthfulness are essential qualities for an effective and good personality. You can only earn respect and admiration of others if you extend the same feelings towards them. If you have integrity and respect, then your personality will shine among many others. Respect others and yourself so that you have an excellent life.

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Last Updated on July 10, 2020

How to Take Control of Your Life with Better Boundaries

How to Take Control of Your Life with Better Boundaries

We all have them—those hurtful, frustrating, offensive, manipulative people in our lives. No matter how hard we try to surround ourselves with positive and kind people, there will always be those who will disrespect, insult, berate, and misuse you if we allow them to.

We may, for a variety of reasons, not be able to avoid them, but we can determine how we interact with them and how we allow them to interact with us.

So, how to take control of your life and stop being pushed around?

Learning to set clear firm boundaries with the people in our lives at work and in our personal lives is the best way to protect ourselves from the negative effects of this kind of behavior.

What Boundaries Are (And What They’re Not)

Boundaries are limits

—they are not threats or ultimatums. Boundaries inform or teach. They are not a form of punishment.

Boundaries are firm lines—determined by you—which cannot be crossed by those around you. They are guidelines for how you will allow others to treat you and what kind of behaviors you will expect.

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Healthy personal boundaries help protect you from physical or emotional pain. You may also need to set firm boundaries at work to ensure you and your time are not disrespected. Don’t allow others to take advantage of your kindness and generosity.

Clear boundaries communicate to others that you demand respect and consideration—that you are willing to stand up for yourself and that you will not be a doormat for anyone. They are a “no trespassing” sign that makes it very clear when a line has been crossed and that there will be consequences for doing so.

Boundaries are not set with the intention of changing other people. They may change how people interact with you, but they are more about enforcing your needs than attempting to change the general behavior and attitude of others.

How to Establish Boundaries and Take Control of Your Life

Here are some ways that you can establish boundaries and take control of your life.

1. Self-Awareness Comes First

Before you can establish boundaries with others, you first need to understand what your needs are.

You are entitled to respect. You have the right to protect yourself from inappropriate or offensive behavior. Setting boundaries is a way of honoring your needs.

To set appropriate boundaries, you need to be clear about what healthy behaviors look like—what healthy relationships look like.

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You first have to become more aware of your feelings and honest with yourself about your expectations and what you feel is appropriate behavior:

  • Where do you need to establish better boundaries?
  • When do you feel disrespected?
  • When do you feel violated, frustrated, or angered by the behavior of others?
  • In what situations do you feel you are being mistreated or taken advantage of?
  • When do you want to be alone?
  • How much space do you need?

You need to honor your own needs and boundaries before you can expect others to honor them. This allows you to take control of your life.

2. Clear Communication Is Essential

Inform others clearly and directly what your expectations are. It is essential to have clear communication if you want others to respect your boundaries. Explain in an honest and respectful tone what you find offensive or unacceptable.

Many people simply aren’t aware that they are behaving inappropriately. They may never have been taught proper manners or consideration for others.

3. Be Specific but Don’t Blame

Taking a blaming or punishing attitude automatically puts people on the defensive. People will not listen when they feel attacked. It’s part of human nature.

That said, you do not need to overexplain or defend yourself. Boundaries are not open to compromise.

Sample language:

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  • “You may not…yell or raise your voice to me…”
  • “I need…to be treated with respect…”
  • “It’s not okay when…you take things from my desk without asking…”
  • “I won’t…do your work…cover for you anymore…”
  • “It’s not acceptable when…you ridicule or insult me…”
  • “I am uncomfortable when…you use offensive language”
  • “I will no longer be able to…lend you money…”

Being able to communicate these without sounding accusatory is essential if you want others to respect your boundaries so you can take control of your life.

4. Consequences Are Often Necessary

Determine what the appropriate consequences will be when boundaries are crossed. If it’s appropriate, be clear about those consequences upfront when communicating those boundaries to others.

Follow through. People won’t respect your boundaries if you don’t enforce them.

Standing our ground and forcing consequences doesn’t come easily to us. We want to be nice. We want people to like us, but we shouldn’t have to trade our self-respect to gain friends or to achieve success.

We may be tempted to let minor disrespect slide to avoid conflict, but as the familiar saying goes, “if you give people an inch, they’ll take a mile.”

It’s much easier to address offensive or inappropriate behavior now than to wait until that behavior has gotten completely out of hand.

It’s also important to remember that positive reinforcement is even more powerful than negative consequences. When people do alter the way they treat you, acknowledge it. Let people know that you notice and appreciate their efforts.

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Final Thoughts

Respect is always a valid reason for setting a boundary. Don’t defend yourself or your needs. Boundaries are often necessary to protect your time, your space, and your feelings. And these are essential if you want to take control of your life.

Start with the easiest boundaries first. Setting boundaries is a skill that needs to be practiced. Enlist support from others if necessary. Inform people immediately when they have crossed the line.

Don’t wait. Communicate politely and directly. Be clear about the consequences and follow them through.

The better you become at setting your own boundaries, the better you become at recognizing and respecting the boundaries of others.

Remember that establishing boundaries is your right. You are entitled to respect. You can’t control how other people behave, but you do have control over the way you allow people to treat you.

Learning to set boundaries is not always easy, but with time, it will become more comfortable. You may eventually find that boundaries become automatic and you no longer need to consciously set them.

They will simply become a natural extension of your self-respect.

Featured photo credit: Thomas Kelley via unsplash.com

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