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The Thief In All Of Us

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The Thief In All Of Us

Have you ever held back on taking a step towards your career just because you thought of all the bad things that could go wrong?

“What if I failed? What if people never get to appreciate me? What if I die before I ever become known in my career?”

Have you ever changed plans on doing that one thing you felt would finally give you the liberation you seek just because the thought of being rejected invaded your mind? Have you ever denied yourself of totally being in love with someone because you felt you were not good enough for them and that fear kept you from bonding with them? If this sounds like you, then you might have a thief living deep inside your mind, and his or her name is Fear.

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    Fear is an enemy. One that comes to steal our lives from us in broad daylight, while we are wide awake and right in the middle of making a decision that is pivotal to our lives. Fear is most times unjustified, unrealistic, nameless, and unreasoning. I have had my own share of fear moments. Times when all I could see was a monster in the dark, and really I am very optimistic person, but when this thief called fear visits, your personality just doesn’t matter.

    However, I don’t think fear is all that bad. Sometimes, fear keeps us from making a wrong decision. Or, for some people, fear is the very reason they go ahead to achieve that goal they were scared of. The fear of failure pushes them to do extra and achieve more. This is putting the emotion called fear to good use; taking that which poses a threat and using it as a propeller for great achievement. For good.

    But for many, fear keeps us on hold. Fear keeps us captive. Fear stops us from breathing right when we need oxygen most. Fear makes us see the negatives to the situation and blinds us to the very obvious positives. Fear saps the very life out of us.

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      As much as fear appears to be real and big, it is only a product of our subconscious mind. You read that right. There’s nothing in the dark. Fear does not exist anywhere else but in the mind. Those things you are really afraid of are not real, it’s only happening in your mind. They are false evidences appearing real. And like everything else, what you pay attention to soon becomes your reality. Can you see why you need not pay attention to it?

      One thing fear does is steal the fuel for our drive and stops us from living the life we really want. Once you let fear rule over your decisions and choices, you may never get to that point of freedom where you define your life on your own terms. Every time you consider what could go wrong in your life, business, career, or relationship before taking a step, you are limiting your happiness and fulfillment as a person. Living perpetually in fear is as good as being dead. The worst thing that can happen to anyone is to be dead while alive.

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        Fear stops you from living even before you stop breathing. Fear keeps you on the edge and makes you average even when you are born with greatness. It crawls up slowly into your mind and deposits thoughts of doubt in there, creating a darkness that never once existed. Fear tells you cannot be great, though you have greatness in you. Fear tells you that you will fail at that project, but you have all it takes to be excellent at it. Fear tells you not to fall in love again because your partner will leave you just the way others have left, but you know what? You are just a decision away from finally meeting your dream partner. Fear is an enemy because it sells you the wrong perspective with the intent to stop you from living life to its fullest!

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          If you don’t want your life filled with regrets, you need to give up on fear. I haven’t seen one person who lived all their life in total fear and proclaimed they lived a fulfilling and satisfied life. At some point, you have to make a decision to live above your fears. Your fears should not become stumbling blocks to your greatness but a ladder with which you climb to the top of self realization and fulfillment.

          To that end, here are some tips that can help anyone looking to free themselves of this enemy. These tips have worked for me personally and I believe they will be of help to you too.

          1. Identify Your Fears

          What you do not know, you cannot confront. Pay close attention to your inner space, your mind. What are you really afraid of? What pictures do you see in your head? Take a mental view of what goes on in your mind. Stay conscious to your subconscious.

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          2. Talk To Someone

          When negative thoughts build up in your mind, one way to dispel them is to talk to someone. It could be a therapist, a trusted friend, your spouse, your kids, your parents — anybody you feel comfortable talking with. You don’t have to hold all that negative energy in. Talking about it stops the negative thoughts from gaining a foothold in your mind, and this is good if you really want to get rid of fear.

          3. Be Positive

          Negativity is the seed that bears the fruit called fear. Nip it in the bud by remaining positive. Instead of thinking of how bad things can get, think of how good things are and could be. Don’t focus too much on the negative.

          4. Face Your Fears

          Never run away from your fears. Don’t make excuses for them. Face them and sort them out with logic and reason. This will forever dissipate their existence in your mind. Take action. When you face your fears, they become weaker because you begin to see that things are not nearly as bad as what you think they are.

          Don’t let fear stop your awesomeness!

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          Featured photo credit: IB Wira Dyatmika via unsplash.com

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          Last Updated on January 13, 2022

          10 Cheap And Amazing Honeymoon Ideas

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          10 Cheap And Amazing Honeymoon Ideas

          A honeymoon is important.  The wedding is over.  The months, or even years, of stress and planning are finally over.  It’s time for the two of you to relax, settle in, and start enjoying your time together as you embark on your first journey as a family.

          To make the most of this time for the least amount of money, it’s important to focus on what you want out of a honeymoon.  This isn’t your typical list of touristy honeymoon locations everyone goes to.  Rather, it’s a list of cheap honeymoon experiences a couple can enjoy together, regardless of where it’s at.

          1. Camping

          A week long camping trip is a fantastic way to see how you mesh together as a couple.  You’re put in a low impact “survival” situation where it’s just the 2 of you and nature.  You have a chance to see how your new spouse handles themselves when left with the basics of life.  There are amazing national parks all over the United States where you can camp for a week for $20-30, disconnect from technology, and enjoy some of the natural wonders our nation has to offer.

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          2. Staycation

          You don’t have to go anywhere for a honeymoon.  In fact, the tradition of taking a honeymoon vacation is a relatively new one.  Prior to the 19th century, a honeymoon involved staying home together for a month to get to know each other physically.  Think of how blissful it could be to take a full month off work, disconnect from the outside world, and focus entirely on projects together.  You may not be wowing your friends and family with pictures of some exotic location, but they’ll be envious of your escape from the rat race nonetheless.

          3. Island Getaway

          People tend to overspend on their honeymoon vacations to Hawaii, Tahiti, etc.  Going to these places doesn’t have to be expensive.  You don’t need to stay in a 5 star resort when you’re on a Best Western budget.  You’re there to be in the atmosphere of the island, not a hotel room. Book a cheap flight and sleep in a hotel alternative, on the beach or in your car.  It’s the view in paradise that really matters.

          4. Fancy Resort

          Book an expensive resort, spa, or retreat in the city you live in.  While this may seem counterintuitive as a cheap destination, when you consider your savings on airfare and other travel costs, you can afford to be treated like royalty within your own city limits.  If you book a honeymoon package, you’ll end up with a lot of free amenities and extra attention.  There’s no need to fly halfway across the world to live the good life.

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          5. Road Trip

          The journey is often more fulfilling than the actual destination.  If you fly out to some exotic locale, you’ll be stuck on a plane for 8-30 hours.  Rent a luxury car, pick a handful of places you each have always wanted to visit, and go on an adventure.  You can keep food costs down by packing your own snacks, but it’s always a good idea to sample the local delicacies wherever you go, even if it’s only a few states over.

          6. Charter a Boat

          If the ocean is your thing, a week-long cruise can cost you $1500-$3000 per person, depending on the destination.  You also have to factor in travel costs to and from the cruise, alcohol, souvenirs, and on-shore excursions.  You’ll also be surrounded by people.  For the same price (and often much cheaper), you can charter your own boat and enjoy the experience in private.

          7. Las Vegas/Atlantic City

          If gambling is your thing, these are the places to do it.  Which one you choose depends on your preference, budget, and proximity.  The way to make this vacation cheaper is to gamble smart.  Stay away from low odd tables (i.e craps, roulette) and read up on the MIT blackjack strategies to beat the house.  If you do it right, you can win enough for a free trip (and gain a valuable team skill in the process).

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          8. Themed Retreats

          There are weeklong retreats all over the world where you can fully immerse yourselves as a couple into a hobby you’re both passionate about.  Go on a yoga/meditation retreat, a ranch, a vineyard/farm, a backpacking adventure, treasure hunt, or whatever you’re into.

          9. Working Honeymoon

          Your honeymoon doesn’t have to be a vacation.  For a truly memorable experience, dedicate a week to a charity or volunteer organization.  You can drive out to a campground to help restore it in the offseason.  Maybe you’ve always wanted to volunteer to help out your local animal shelter, plant trees, help the homeless, etc.  Use the time to do something together as a couple that will fulfill you spiritually while contributing to the community.  Just because you’re on a honeymoon doesn’t mean you can’t be productive.

          10. Festivals, Fairs & Special Events

          Every city, state, and country has festivals, fairs, and special events.  Find one you’re interested in.  If you time your wedding right, your honeymoon can be a trip to one of these festivals.  Burning Man, SXSW, Bonnaroo, the Renaissance Fair, regional harvest festivals, Mardi Gras, New Years Eve in Times Square, a movie premiere, or whatever you’re into.  If you plan your honeymoon at the right time in the right place, the possibilities are endless.

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          Featured photo credit: Josue Michel via unsplash.com

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