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4 Important Things You Lose In Life And Why You Should Be Grateful

4 Important Things You Lose In Life And Why You Should Be Grateful

Losing things is often painted with negative connotations. As humans, we tend to hold onto things in all areas of our lives — our jobs, relationships, friendships, and even our control over situations.

But is this healthy in terms of our wellbeing and overall happiness? Living in the present moment is the best way to obtain a happy and fulfilling life, which means we have to let go of the past and lose things in life in order to grow as a person.

While it’s sometimes difficult, we should never think negatively about changes we face. In fact, we should see them as opportunities to grow and seek new and interesting paths. Here are 4 important things to lose in your life that will expand your mindset, perspective, and ultimately help you become a better person.

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1. Losing Your Direction

Most of us get to a stage in life when we question our motives, our past and present actions, and our true happiness. When we go through this, it can feel extremely overwhelming, sometimes depressing, and we feel lost about what our life purpose really is. Perhaps you question your direction of career or feel you’ve missed out on pursuing your dream because you’re too old. What we need to remember is that it’s these times that are actually there to help us figure out our true path in life; whether we’re on the right one or if we need to find something different.

When we fall into negative situations, they are there to show us that we need to rethink, readjust, and walk down a more suitable and happy road. Don’t ever think that you’re a failure because you haven’t figured it all out yet — everything happens at the right time and it’s these moments in life when we lose direction that we are being told to reprogram because a different path may be more beneficial to us.

If we don’t lose direction every now and then, we don’t get the opportunity to grow, change, and pursue avenues that could lead to ultimate happiness.

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2. Losing Touch With Others

While having many people in our life can bring a great dimension to our wellbeing and happiness, we often hold onto those relationships that no longer serve us. Sentimentality can cause us keep certain people in our lives — they remind us of the good times, they were an intrinsic part of our lives once or shared happy memories. However, over time we change and grow as people — our tastes, attitudes, dreams, and directions in life can change either subtly or dramatically and this can mean drifting away from once-important people.

As sad as this may feel, losing the (what seems like) never-ending connections with our friends can be a valuable life lesson. It teaches us the importance of quality over quantity, it helps us let go of those that don’t bring any growth into our lives, and it can show us that the past is the past but we’re now living in the present.

Holding onto past, fading relationships only stunts us in our efforts to simply be in the present. By losing touch with people and letting them go, we are able to cherish what they contributed rather than feeling a sense of negativity and sadness that they are no longer a bigger part of our lives.

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3. Losing Yourself

Life is all about losing ourselves, changing ourselves, and growing according to our ever-evolving experiences, mindsets, and perspectives. Change is inevitable, but sometimes we can hold onto our old selves, perhaps even wishing we were how we used to be.

The reality is that there is no fixed us. We are constantly adapting to an ever-changing world and our changes are just a sign of progression in this journey of life. To lose yourself means experiencing and opening up to different experiences, such as travelling, studying, moving abroad, or changing careers, and marching head-on into your fears and coming out the other side. Everything we do that challenges the way we think and view the world allows us to lose a small part of our old self and create a new, improved person. This constant evolution allows us to truly find our happiness.

4. Losing Control Over Things

Uncertainty is a fear that most of us have. By dealing with this, we tend to try and control situations or even people. While we’re young, we believe we have much more control in life than we think, but as we get older and we gain more life experiences, we realise that most things in life are out of our control. Life is constantly changing and nothing really stays the same. This means we can either adapt to the changes or they float out of our existence.

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While sometimes we desperately hold onto things such as relationships, jobs, and general life situations, this only serves as a trap that keeps us locked in our comfort zones. When we’re in this space, there is little room to grow or seek other opportunities that we’d otherwise ignore or be unwilling to pursue.

For example, imagine you’re made redundant from your job. While this is initially seen as a bad situation, you come to realise that if you were truly honest with yourself, you weren’t really passionate about your job anymore and this “bad” situation that was out of your control is actually giving you the opportunity to find a job much more suitable and enjoyable — which you may not have done if the redundancy hadn’t happened.

Embracing the fact that you have little control may seem like a scary thought, but it’s these times that open up opportunities for us that we wouldn’t ordinarily take or pursue.

So never be afraid of change and losing things in life. While it may sometimes seem like life is against you in these situations, they are really just amazing opportunities in disguise.

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Jenny Marchal

A passionate writer who loves sharing about positive psychology.

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Last Updated on July 3, 2020

30 Small Habits To Lead A More Peaceful Life

30 Small Habits To Lead A More Peaceful Life

In today’s world, true peace must come from within us and our own actions. Here are 30 small things you can do on a regular basis to increase your overall sense of harmony, peace, and well-being:

1. Don’t go to every fight you’re invited to

Particularly when you’re around those who thrive on chaos, be willing to decline the invitation to join in on the drama.

2. Focus on your breath

Throughout the day, stop to take a few deep breaths. Keep stress at bay with techniques such as “square breathing.” Breathe in for four counts, hold for four counts, then out for four counts, and hold again for four counts. Repeat this cycle four times.

3. Get organized and purge old items

A cluttered space often creates a cluttered spirit. Take the time to get rid of anything you haven’t used in a year and invest in organizational systems that help you sustain a level of neatness.

4. Stop yourself from being judgmental

Whenever you are tempted to have an opinion about someone else’s life, check your intentions. Judging others creates and promotes negative energy.

5. Say ‘thank you’ early and often

Start and end each day with an attitude of gratitude. Look for opportunities in your daily routine and interactions to express appreciation.

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6. Smile more

Even if you have to “fake it until you make it,” there are many scientific benefits of smiling and laughing. Also, pay attention to your facial expression when you are doing neutral activities such as driving and walking. Turn that frown upside down!

7. Don’t worry about the future

As difficult as this sounds, there is a direct connection between staying in the present and living a more peaceful life. You cannot control the future. As the old proverb goes, “Worry is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do, but it won’t get you anywhere.” Practice gently bringing your thoughts back to the present.

8. Eat real food

The closer the food is to the state from which it came from the earth, the better you will feel in eating it. Choose foods that grew from a plant over food that was made in a plant.

9. Choose being happy over being right

Too often, we sacrifice inner peace in order to make a point. It’s rarely worth it.

10. Keep technology out of the bedroom

Many studies, such as one conducted by Brigham and Women’s Hospital, have connected blue light of electronic devices before bed to adverse sleep and overall health. To make matters worse, many people report that they cannot resist checking email and social media when their cell phone is in reach of their bed, regardless of the time.

11. Make use of filtering features on social media

You may not want to “unfriend” someone completely, however you can choose whether you want to follow their posts and/or the sources of information that they share.

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12. Get comfortable with silence

When you picture someone who is the ultimate state of peace, typically they aren’t talking.

13. Listen to understand, not to respond

So often in conversations, we use our ears to give us cues about when it is our turn to say what we want to say. Practice active listening, ask questions, process, then speak.

14. Put your troubles in a bubble

Whenever you start to feel anxious, visualize the situation being wrapped in a bubble and then picture that sphere floating away.

15. Speak more slowly

Often a lack of peace manifests itself in fast or clipped speech. Take a breath, slow down, and let your thoughtful consideration drive your words.

16. Don’t procrastinate

Nothing adds stress to our lives like waiting until the last minute.

17. Buy a coloring book

Mandala coloring books for adults are becoming more popular because of their connection to creating inner peace.

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18. Prioritize yourself

You are the only person who you are guaranteed to live with 24 hours a day for the rest of your life.

19. Forgive others

Holding a grudge is hurting you exponentially more than anyone else. Let it go.

20. Check your expectations

Presumption often leads to drama. Remember the old saying, “Expectations are premeditated resentments.”

21. Engage in active play

Let your inner child come out and have some fun. Jump, dance, play, and pretend!

22. Stop criticizing yourself

The world is a hard enough place with more than enough critics. Your life is not served well by being one of them.

23. Focus your energy and attention on what you want

Thoughts, words, and actions all create energy. Energy attracts like energy. Put out what you want to get back.

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24. Assign yourself “complaint free” days.

Make a conscious decision not to complain about anything for a whole day. It might be harder than you think and the awareness will stick with you.

25. Surround yourself with people you truly enjoy being in the company of

Personalities tend to be contagious, and not everyone’s is worth catching. Be judicious in your choices.

26. Manage your money

Financial concerns rank top on the list of what causes people stress. Take the time each month to do a budget, calculate what you actually spend and sanity check that against the money you have coming in.

27. Stop trying to control everything

Not only is your inner control freak sabotaging your sense of peace, it is also likely getting in the way of external relationships as well.

28. Practice affirmations

Repeat positive phrases that depict the life and qualities you want to attract. It may not come naturally to you, but it works.

29. Get up before sunrise

Personally witnessing the dawn brings a unique sense of awe and appreciation for life.

30. Be yourself

Nothing creates more inner discord than trying to be something other than who we really are. Authenticity breeds happiness.

Featured photo credit: man watching sunrise via stokpic.com

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