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7 Ways To Make Your Life Much Simpler And Happier

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7 Ways To Make Your Life Much Simpler And Happier

“Any intelligent fool can make things bigger, more complex, and more violent. It takes a touch of genius – and a lot of courage – to move in the opposite direction.” – E. F. Schumacker

In an age where we seem to pride ourselves in being intensely busy and remaining connected through technology 24/7, it is easy to forget that it’s the simple things in life that make us happy.

Sometimes we need to find ways to restore this simplicity in our lives. Here are 7 ways to make your life a lot simpler and happier.

1. Call the person, avoid texting

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    Texting has become a common form of communication, to the point where we have actually forgotten the original purpose of the phone: to actually call a person and speak to them directly. Yes, people, there is actually another person on the other side of that mobile device.

    Through texting, It’s very easy for what you want to say to actually be lost in translation. It’s very easy for misunderstandings to happen. And it’s definitely a lot harder to sort out any relationship problems or business issue you may be having. Aside from being incredibly time consuming, the sense of emotion is removed and you can’t actually tell how the person is feeling.

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    Would it not be a lot easier if you just picked up the phone and called? One would think so. You could instantly let it be known how you feel. Nothing is lost in translation. The emotion is not removed. There are no misunderstandings. It’s quicker, less time consuming (as you won’t be dwelling on the problem through back and forth messages) and more importantly you will be happier in knowing that you are sorting out the problem.

    2. Openly vent your emotions; don’t keep them bottled up

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      Are you the type of person who has the tendency to hide their emotions? You keep everything inside. When you are angry, you don’t let it be known that you are angry. When you are unhappy with someone, you don’t let that person know. When something someone does irritates you, you don’t tell them.

      The problem with this is that it can cause huge stress in your life. It makes you unhappy. Eventually, all these emotions come out, all at once. It’s not pretty. It’s not healthy, both psychologically and physically.

      Rather find ways to channel these emotions constructively. Chat with a friend. Find a safe place. e.g. your room where you can openly let these emotions out. Doing this will in the long run surely make you healthier and a lot happier as a person.

      3. Create your own memories; avoid the comparison game

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        How often do you find yourself, scrolling through Facebook, reading post after post of people doing amazing things? You see people travelling the world. Going on hikes. Relaxing with friends. Going out to lunch in beautiful restaurants. Inside you feel a little jealous and you think to yourself. “Why am I not doing these amazing things.?”

        Well exactly, why aren’t you? Go out and create your own memories, instead of spending your days reading what others are doing. Visit the places you wanted to visit. Read that book you wanted to read. Climb that mountain. Jump in the dam naked.

        Do all those things you want to do and more importantly, stop comparing yourself to others. Avoid the comparison game at all cost. This will not make you happier. What will make you happier is creating your own memories.

        4. Maintain open forms of communication; don’t assume

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          Have you ever guessed what your loved ones or the people you care about are thinking, and been totally wrong? Have you assumed they like something, when in fact this was not the case? Maybe you thought they liked going to a specific restaurant because you have always taken them there, but never actually asked if they enjoyed it?

          Assuming and guessing what people think can create complications down the line. Through maintaining open forms of communication and simply asking your loved one’s questions directly, you avoid miscommunication and ensure a healthier and happier relationship.

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          5. Actions speak louder than words; don’t panic

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            We often find ourselves not comforting our loved ones in times of need because we feel we don’t know how to comfort them. We panic about what to do. And what makes it worse is that sometimes your loved ones don’t even want to talk. What do you do?

            Sometimes all that is needed is for you to be there. As simple as that. They don’t need words. They don’t want to chat. They just want your touch. They just need a hug. Such a simple action can speak one thousand words.

            6. Try something new, don’t hesitate

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              Do you find yourself hesitating over what to do next? Maybe you are scared of trying something new? Maybe you are scared of what people think? There’s an age old saying:

              “It’s better to ask for forgiveness than to ask for permission.”

              This means that it’s better to act decisively and apologise for it later than seek someone’s approval to act and possibly risk delay. So if you want to do something do it. Do what makes you happy. Don’t be scared to try something. Don’t be hesitant. You might just find that through trying that something, that you absolutely love it. That it made you a lot happier as a person.

              And if it didn’t, well that’s fine. You will survive. Move on to the next thing, knowing that you have eliminated one other thing that doesn’t make you happy.

              7. Actively work on your future; stop worrying

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                We often overcomplicate things, by worrying unnecessarily about the future, instead of actively working on it now. Rather spend time on those things you can control right now and stop worrying about the things you cannot control.

                For example, if you want to start your own business, take simple small steps towards achieving that dream that will make you happier.

                There is no guarantee as to exactly how the future will turn out, but through focusing on those small things we can control right now, we are on the right track towards a future that will surely be a lot brighter and happier.

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                More by this author

                Nick Darlington

                Nick is a Multipotentialite, an entrepreneur, a blogger and a traveler.

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                Last Updated on November 18, 2021

                10 Proven Ways to Judge a Person’s Character

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                10 Proven Ways to Judge a Person’s Character

                We all fall into the trap of judging a person’s character by their appearance. How wrong we are! All too often, the real character of the person only appears when some negative event hits them or you. Then you may see a toxic person emerging from the ruins and it is often a shock.

                A truly frightening example is revealed in the book by O’Toole in Bowman called Dangerous Instincts: How Gut Instincts Betray Us. A perfectly respectable, charming, well dressed neighbor was found to have installed a torture chamber in his garage where he was systematically abusing kidnapped women. This is an extreme example, but it does show how we can be totally deceived by a person’s physical appearance, manners and behavior.

                So, what can you do? You want to be able to assess personal qualities when you come into contact with colleagues, fresh acquaintances and new friends who might even become lifelong partners. You want to know if they are:

                • honest
                • reliable
                • competent
                • kind and compassionate
                • capable of taking the blame
                • able to persevere
                • modest and humble
                • pacific and can control anger.

                The secret is to reserve judgment and take your time. Observe them in certain situations; look at how they react. Listen to them talking, joking, laughing, explaining, complaining, blaming, praising, ranting, and preaching. Only then will you be able to judge their character. This is not foolproof, but if you follow the 10 ways below, you have a pretty good chance of not ending up in an abusive relationship.

                1. Is anger a frequent occurrence?

                All too often, angry reactions which may seem to be excessive are a sign that there are underlying issues. Do not think that every person who just snaps and throws his/her weight around mentally and physically is just reacting normally. Everyone has an occasional angry outburst when driving or when things go pear-shaped.

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                But if this is almost a daily occurrence, then you need to discover why and maybe avoid that person. Too often, anger will escalate to violent and aggressive behavior. You do not want to be near someone who thinks violence can solve personal or global problems.

                2. Can you witness acts of kindness?

                How often do you see this person being kind and considerate? Do they give money to beggars, donate to charity, do voluntary work or in some simple way show that they are willing to share the planet with about 7 billion other people?

                I was shocked when a guest of mine never showed any kindness to the weak and disadvantaged people in our town. She was ostensibly a religious person, but I began to doubt the sincerity of her beliefs.

                “The best index to a person’s character is how he treats people who can’t do him any good, and how he treats people who can’t fight back.”

                Abigail Van Buren

                3. How does this person take the blame?

                Maybe you know that s/he is responsible for a screw-up in the office or even in not turning up on time for a date. Look at their reaction. If they start blaming other colleagues or the traffic, well, this is an indication that they are not willing to take responsibility for their mistakes.

                4. Don’t use Facebook as an indicator.

                You will be relieved to know that graphology (the study of that forgotten skill of handwriting) is no longer considered a reliable test of a person’s character. Neither is Facebook stalking, fortunately. A study showed that Facebook use of foul language, sexual innuendo and gossip were not reliable indicators of a candidate’s character or future performance in the workplace.

                5. Read their emails.

                Now a much better idea is to read the person’s emails. Studies show that the use of the following can indicate certain personality traits:

                • Too many exclamation points may reveal a sunny disposition
                • Frequent errors may indicate apathy
                • Use of smileys is the only way a person can smile at you
                • Use of the third person may reveal a certain formality
                • Too many question marks can show anger
                • Overuse of capital letters is regarded as shouting. They are a definite no-no in netiquette, yet a surprising number of  people still use them.

                6. Watch out for the show offs.

                Listen to people as they talk. How often do they mention their achievements, promotions, awards and successes? If this happens a lot, it is a sure indication that this person has an over-inflated view of his/her achievements. They are unlikely to be modest or show humility. What a pity!  Another person to avoid.

                7. Look for evidence of perseverance.

                A powerful indicator of grit and tenacity is when a person persists and never gives up when they really want to achieve a life goal. Look for evidence of them keeping going in spite of enormous difficulties.

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                Great achievements by scientists and inventors all bear the hallmark of perseverance. We only have to think of Einstein, Edison (who failed thousands of times) and Nelson Mandela to get inspiration. The US Department of Education is in no doubt about how grit, tenacity and perseverance will be key success factors for youth in the 21st century.

                8. Their empathy score is high.

                Listen to how they talk about the less fortunate members of our society such as the poor, immigrants and the disabled. Do you notice that they talk in a compassionate way about these people? The fact that they even mention them is a strong indicator of empathy.

                People with zero empathy will never talk about the disadvantaged. They will rarely ask you a question about a difficult time or relationship. They will usually steer the conversation back to themselves. These people have zero empathy and in extreme cases, they are psychopaths who never show any feelings towards their victims.

                9. Learn how to be socially interactive.

                We are social animals and this is what makes us so uniquely human. If a person is isolated or a loner, this may be a negative indicator of their character. You want to meet a person who knows about trust, honesty and loyalty. The only way to practice these great qualities is to actually interact socially. The great advantage is that you can share problems and celebrate success and joy together.

                “One can acquire everything in solitude, except character.”

                Stendhal

                 10. Avoid toxic people.

                These people are trying to control others and often are failing to come to terms with their own failures. Typical behavior and conversations may concern:

                • Envy or jealousy
                • Criticism of partners, colleagues and friends
                • Complaining about their own lack of success
                • Blaming others for their own bad luck or failure
                • Obsession with themselves and their problems

                Listen to these people talk and you will quickly discover that you need to avoid them at all costs because their negativity will drag you down. In addition, as much as you would like to help them, you are not qualified to do so.

                Now, having looked at some of the best ways to judge a person, what about yourself? How do others see you? Why not take Dr. Phil’s quiz and find out. Can you bear it?

                Featured photo credit: Jacek Dylag via unsplash.com

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