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How Long Do You Take In The Shower? It Might Reveal Your Loneliness

How Long Do You Take In The Shower? It Might Reveal Your Loneliness

Who doesn’t love a loooong, steamy shower or luxuriating for hours in a soothing hot bubble bath?

If that question gave you the urge to immediately strip, hop in the tub and spend the next hour enveloped in a toasty cocoon of tranquil water; you may have a deeper issue than just a profound love of cleanliness.

You may be feeling lonely.

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And, what is loneliness?

The Psychology Department at the University of Chicago defines it as:

“The distress that results from discrepancies between ideal and perceived social relationships.”

In other words, it’s about disappointment; you don’t feel as intimately connected to people, or as happy in their presence as you think you should and that upsets you.

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Psychology Today points out that many factors affect how different people respond to loneliness, from how we regulate our emotions about isolation to the level of connection that we feel we need.

And it doesn’t always look the same for everyone. Sometimes it’s not as obvious as a person sighing while staring off into the distance and listening to depressing sappy country music.

Surprisingly, one of the key signs of loneliness isn’t feeling like you don’t have enough friends. Some people who experience loneliness are well connected socially, yet experience a feeling of isolation and disconnection from other humans.

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A Long-Hot Shower or Bath Can Be An Indicator of Loneliness

According to the researchers at Yale University, people who take a long-hot shower or bath may do so to subconsciously ward off feelings of loneliness or social isolation.

“The lonelier a person is, the more showers and baths they take, the hotter the water, and the longer they stay under the water,” said psychologist John Bargh, PhD, a researcher at Yale University.

The research revealed that hot water in a bathtub or from a shower acts as a substitute for a companion and can actually dispel feelings of isolation and exclusion.

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The study was able to uncover a fascinating truth: that feelings of social warmth or coldness can be sparked by experiences of physical warmth or coldness, and vice versa. In other words, if you want to make dinner out with acquaintances warm and less awkward — wear a warm, cozy sweater.

Even more interesting is the notion that something as simple as holding a glass of warm drink can make someone more trusting and generous towards others.​

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    Denise Hill

    Speech Writer/Senior Editor

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    Last Updated on September 20, 2018

    7 Powerful Questions To Find Out What You Want To Do With Your Life

    7 Powerful Questions To Find Out What You Want To Do With Your Life

    What do I want to do with my life? It’s a question all of us think about at one point or another.

    For some, the answer comes easily. For others, it takes a lifetime to figure out.

    It’s easy to just go through the motions and continue to do what’s comfortable and familiar. But for those of you who seek fulfillment, who want to do more, these questions will help you paint a clearer picture of what you want to do with your life.

    1. What are the things I’m most passionate about?

    The first step to living a more fulfilling life is to think about the things that you’re passionate about.

    What do you love? What fulfills you? What “work” do you do that doesn’t feel like work? Maybe you enjoy writing, maybe you love working with animals or maybe you have a knack for photography.

    The point is, figure out what you love doing, then do more of it.

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    2. What are my greatest accomplishments in life so far?

    Think about your past experiences and the things in your life you’re most proud of.

    How did those accomplishments make you feel? Pretty darn good, right? So why not try and emulate those experiences and feelings?

    If you ran a marathon once and loved the feeling you had afterwards, start training for another one. If your child grew up to be a star athlete or musician because of your teachings, then be a coach or mentor for other kids.

    Continue to do the things that have been most fulfilling for you.

    3. If my life had absolutely no limits, what would I choose to have and what would I choose to do?

    Here’s a cool exercise: Think about what you would do if you had no limits.

    If you had all the money and time in the world, where would you go? What would you do? Who would you spend time with?

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    These answers can help you figure out what you want to do with your life. It doesn’t mean you need millions of dollars to be happy though.

    What it does mean is answering these questions will help you set goals to reach certain milestones and create a path toward happiness and fulfillment. Which leads to our next question …

    4. What are my goals in life?

    Goals are a necessary component to set you up for a happy future. So answer these questions:

    Once you figure out the answers to each of these, you’ll have a much better idea of what you should do with your life.

    5. Whom do I admire most in the world?

    Following the path of successful people can set you up for success.

    Think about the people you respect and admire most. What are their best qualities? Why do you respect them? What can you learn from them?

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    You’re the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with.[1] So don’t waste your time with people who hold you back from achieving your dreams.

    Spend more time with happy, successful, optimistic people and you’ll become one of them.

    6. What do I not like to do?

    An important part of figuring out what you want to do with your life is honestly assessing what you don’t want to do.

    What are the things you despise? What bugs you the most about your current job?

    Maybe you hate meetings even though you sit through 6 hours of them every day. If that’s the case, find a job where you can work more independently.

    The point is, if you want something to change in your life, you need to take action. Which leads to our final question …

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    7. How hard am I willing to work to get what I want?

    Great accomplishments never come easy. If you want to do great things with your life, you’re going to have to make a great effort. That will probably mean putting in more hours the average person, getting outside your comfort zone and learning as much as you can to achieve as much as you can.

    But here’s the cool part: it’s often the journey that is the most fulfilling part. It’s during these seemingly small, insignificant moments that you’ll often find that “aha” moments that helps you answer the question,

    “What do I want to do with my life?”

    So take the first step toward improving your life. You won’t regret it.

    Featured photo credit: Andrew Ly via unsplash.com

    Reference

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