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A Love Letter to Myself

A Love Letter to Myself

I share this with hope that you’ll write your own love letter and be reminded that the only love you need is your own…

Love Yourself/Quinn Dombrowski

    Dear Me,

    You and I go way back, to the beginning. We’re one hundred percent connected in a way no one will–or could ever–understand. We’ve been there, standing together. Sometimes crying in the shower, sometimes snorting through our nose, but it’s always been you and me. Always and forever…

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    Or so it was supposed to be, but some time ago I left you–

    I left you floundering on your own, to rely on love and encouragement and strength from others–from strangers–when it was I who should have held you up. When it was I who should have hugged you and praised you and appreciated you for the wondrous person you are–for all the beauty and life you bring to this world.

    I seldom tell you how much I love you. How much I admire you. How beautiful and caring and intelligent and strong you are. That you are my hero.

    I should have told you to ignore the jeers and snickers. To not care what others think. To not be afraid to be different. To not be ashamed of who you are. Worst of all,  I should have ignored the jeers and snickers. I shouldn’t have cared what people thought. Because in doing so, I said horrible things to shame you. I took you for granted and dishonored you. I said you’re not enough. That if you’d only be a better teacher, a better wife, a better friend, a better writer, a better lover…then I’d love you. If you were more confident, more social, more assertive, then I’d respect you. If you had less sun spots, if you ate less carbs, if you were more adventurous and thick-skinned, if you were a mother, if you achieved your goals, then I’d want you. I’ve said things to you I wouldn’t say to my worst enemy and you’ve taken it, and internalized every calloused word.

    And for that I’ve lost you.

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    I should have been there for you.

    I should have taken care of you.

    I should have fought harder to be the person you deserve.

    I should have protected, defended, and cherished you.

    I’m so incredibly sorry I failed you. I’m sorry for hurting you, for leaving you, for not reminding you every second of every day how wonderful you are. How worthy you are. How brave and kind and powerful you are. Please forgive me.

    YOU are significant.

    YOU are worthy.

    YOU are beautiful.

    YOU are smart.

    YOU are strong.

    YOU are enough.

    Self Esteem by Kiran Foster

      I know you are going through hard times right now. That life hasn’t given you what you hoped and hasn’t turned out the way you thought it would. I know you are disappointed and sometimes feel like a failure or that it is all your fault. But the truth is: YOU are not a failure nor could you ever be. YOU are strong and brave and honest and YOU will overcome. YOU will persevere and come out on the other side more YOU than you’ve ever been before.

      You do not need anyone else’s approval, love, or friendship to be whole.

      Together WE are enough. WE will conquer this new future. I’ve got you and this time I’m not letting go. Ever. This time, I will put you first.

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      I will respect you and honor you and cherish you.

      Love for eternity,

      Me

      If you’re ever feeling down or unworthy, try writing a love letter to yourself. You’ll be surprised all the healing that can take place…

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      Video of the importance of writing a love letter to oneself…

      Featured photo credit: Writing a Letter That I’ll Never Send/Martina via flickr.com

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      Last Updated on November 26, 2019

      How to Motivate Yourself: 13 Simple Ways to Try Now

      How to Motivate Yourself: 13 Simple Ways to Try Now

      Who needs Tony Robbins when you can motivate yourself? Overcoming the emotional hurdle to get stuff done when you’d rather sit on the couch isn’t always easy. But unless calling in sick and waking up at noon have no consequences for you, it’s often a must.

      For those of you who never procrastinate, distract yourself or drag your feet when you should be doing something important, well done so far! But for the rest of you, it’s good to have a library of motivational boosters to move along.

      Despite your best efforts, passion, habits and a flow-producing environment can fail. In that case, it’s time to find whatever emotional pump-up you can use to get started.

      Whether you’re starting a business, trying to los weight or breaking a bad habit, you’ll learn how to motivate yourself with different techniques here:

      1. Go Back to “Why”

      Focusing on a dull task doesn’t make it any more attractive. Zooming out and asking yourself why you are bothering in the first place will make it more appealing.

      If you can’t figure out why, then there’s a good chance you shouldn’t bother with it in the first place.

      2. Go for Five

      Start working for five minutes. Often that little push will be enough to get you going.

      3. Move Around

      Get your body moving as you would if you were extremely motivated to do something. This ‘faking it’ approach to motivation may seem silly or crude but it works.

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      4. Find the Next Step

      If it seems impossible to work on a project for you, you can try to focus on the next immediate step.

      Fighting an amorphous blob of work will only cause procrastination. Chunk it up so that it becomes manageable. Learn how to stop procrastinating in this guide.

      5. Find Your Itch

      What is keeping you from working? Don’t let the itch continue without isolating it and removing the problem.

      Are you unmotivated because you feel overwhelmed, tired, afraid, bored, restless or angry? Maybe it is because you aren’t sure you have time or delegated tasks haven’t been finished yet?

      6. Deconstruct Your Fears

      I’m sure you don’t have a phobia about getting stuff done. But at the same time, hidden fears or anxieties can keep you from getting real work completed.

      Isolate the unknowns and make yourself confident, you can handle the worst case scenario.

      7. Get a Partner

      Find someone who will motivate you when you’re feeling lazy. I have a friend I go to the gym with. Besides spotting weight, having a friend can help motivate you to work hard when you’d normally quit.

      8. Kickstart Your Day

      Plan out tomorrow. Get up early and place all the important things early in the morning. Building momentum early in the day can usually carry you forward far later.

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      Having a morning routine is a good idea for you to stay motivated!

      9. Read Books

      Read not just self-help or motivational books but any book that has new ideas. New ideas get your mental gears turning and can build motivation. Here’re more reasons to read every day.

      Learning new ideas puts your brain in motion so it requires less time to speed up to your tasks.

      10. Get the Right Tools

      Your environment can have a profound effect on your enthusiasm. Computers that are too slow, inefficient applications or a vehicle that breaks down constantly can kill your motivation.

      Building motivation is almost as important as avoiding the traps that can stop it.

      11. Be Careful with the Small Problems

      The worst killer of motivation is facing a seemingly small problem that creates endless frustration.

      Reframe little problems that must be fixed as bigger ones or they will kill any drive you have.

      12. Develop a Mantra

      Find a few statements that focus your mind and motivate you. It doesn’t matter whether they are pulled from a tacky motivational poster or just a few words to tell you what to do.

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      If you aren’t sure where to start, a good personal mantra is “Do it now!” You can find more here too: 7 Empowering Affirmations That Will Help You Be Mentally Strong

      13. Build on Success

      Success creates success. When you’ve just won, it is easy to feel motivated about almost anything. Emotions tend not to be situation specific, so a small win, whether it is a compliment from a colleague or finishing two thirds of your tasks before noon can turn you into a juggernaut.

      There are many ways you can place small successes earlier on to spur motivation later. Structuring your to-do lists, placing straightforward tasks such as exercising early in the day or giving yourself an affirmation can do the trick.

      Bonus: Staying Motivated Forever

      The best way to motivate yourself is to organize your life so you don’t have to. If work is a constant battle for you, perhaps it is time to start thinking about a new job. The idea is that explicit motivational techniques should be a backup, not your regular routine.

      Here are some other things to consider making work flow more naturally:

      Passion

      Do things you have a passion for. We all have to do things we don’t want to. But if life has become a chronic source of dull chores, you’ve got a big problem that needs fixing.

      Not sure what your passion is to get you motivated? This will help you: How to Get Motivated and Be Happy Every Day When You Wake Up

      Habits

      You can’t put everything on autopilot. I’ve found putting a few core habits in place creates a structure for the day.

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      Waking up at the same time, working at the same times and having a similar productive routine makes it easier to do the next day.

      This guide will be useful for you if you’re looking to build good habits: Understand Your Habits to Control Them 100%

      Flow

      Flow is the state where your mind is completely focused on the task at hand. While there are many factors that go into producing this state, having the right challenge level is a big part.

      Find ways to tweak your tasks so they hover in that sweet spot between boredom and maddening frustration.

      Easily distracted and hard to focus? Here’s your solution.

      Final Thoughts

      With all these tips I’ve shared with you, now you know what to do when you’re feeling unmotivated.

      Find your passion and develop a positive mantra so when the next time negativity hits you again, you know how to stay positive and motivated!

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      Featured photo credit: Pexels via pexels.com

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